View Full Version : Ethical question for OOT
Hi,
I am a frequent poster here but choose to post this under this gimmick account.
I live in a average standard block with 8 flats, priced around 200-300k. About a year ago my neighbour living two stairs above me told me that xxx was considering buying his apartment for about 300k. xxx is a high-profiled female singer whose videos are shown appx. 10 times daily at MTV and almost always makes it to the top 10 in sexiest women contests. A little hard to believe that she was going to move to our rather average block and not some hollywood mansion, but her father bought the apartment (I figure it was to make it harder to trace) and she moved in. She put only her first name on the doorbell and no name sign on her door. So obviously she was looking for a anonymous place of living.
Having her living there has been a rather funny experience. She is never leaving her flat withot being dressed like she was going to a photoshoot (when you are unshaved and put on some used clothes to go to buy bread, meeting her that way is a bit embarrassing /images/graemlins/smile.gif). I have flirted a bit with her and she is very nice and kind (no arrogance at all). When we had our annual backyard shineup she apologized to everyone for not being able to take part and some weeks later I found her doing gardening in the backyard. I told her it is nice that somebody takes responsibility and she said she had been so busy recording and touring that she had not had a day off for months but now she finally had one.
Here comes the ethical question. I have advertized my flat for sale, and I have not gotten any satisfactory bids. I guess that if I would tell that she lives in the building I would probably get a lot of offers. But I imagine that this way; the highest offer would be likely to come from either a crazy fan, a lunatic stalker or some lowlife paparazzi and her hideout from all the fuzz surrounding her whereever she goes would be destroyed. She is actually very lucky to have had 7 neighbours that have kept their mouth shut.
Am I too nice not playing this card, or is it an ethical nobrainer?
PS. When I told her I was moving, without pausing she said "oh no", like in the "I was hoping something could happen between us"-way. That raised my self-consciousness to a new level /images/graemlins/smile.gif. However, having dated a celebrity earlier and seen the backside of that I will never do it again.
does everyone like my new avatar? stuey made it.
NLSoldier
10-01-2005, 06:52 AM
if she is jessica simpson my bid is 1,000,000.
jason_t
10-01-2005, 06:54 AM
It will be easier for us to decide what's right if you tell us who it is.
NLSoldier
10-01-2005, 06:56 AM
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It will be easier for us to decide what's right if you tell us who it is.
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and who you are.
Burn your bridges and go for the money. I mean, you are leaving the place and will never have to see her again. She can always buy a new place if she has to.
Wait wait wait, are you on a kiss-hello basis or not? I hate those kiss-hellos. I never know quite how to react. Makes me uncomfortable.
dcasper70
10-01-2005, 07:12 AM
I don't think there's anything unethical about playing this card. You own a property and you have the right to advertise it in any way you see fit in order to generate a bid that you're comfortable with.
The fact that you're posting this tells me that you aren't comfortable with it. IMO this is good, it shows that you are not a completely self centered prick.
This woman went out of her way to remain anonymous in regards to this living situation, and you want to respect that. Good for you! Most people wouldn't hesitate to profit from this opportunity. You, on the other hand, show some semblance of character.
She probably loves the fact that she has a quiet place where she can just be left in peace for even short periods of time. Every person should have this luxury.
OK, now that I got that painfully gay crap off my chest...
You know that sooner or later one of the other vermin in the block will spill the beans. Wait for that, then sell. This will also give you a good amount of time to SIIHP, SIBHT, PIIHM, etc, etc...
Hey, you may have character, but you're not perfect! /images/graemlins/laugh.gif
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Wait wait wait, are you on a kiss-hello basis or not? I hate those kiss-hellos. I never know quite how to react. Makes me uncomfortable.
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Just on a hello basis, no kissing /images/graemlins/smile.gif. Wanted to take her out to a cafe but I don't want my face in those celebrity magazines.
jason_t
10-01-2005, 07:21 AM
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Just on a hello basis, no kissing /images/graemlins/smile.gif. Wanted to take her out to a cafe but I don't want my face in those celebrity magazines.
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Would you just admit you can't get her instead of making up lame excuses?
Thanks for the advice, however I need to sell now as I have already moved to another flat, waiting is thus not an option.
What makes it a bit hard is that I think it will not be easy for her to find the same somewhere else. She was just very lucky finding a building with ordinary people, where people keep their mouth shut. I guess she wants some kind of ordinary life, since she actually cleans the stairs etc. herself.
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Wanted to take her out to a cafe but I don't want my face in those celebrity magazines.
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And you decided not to marry her because it would make doing your taxes more complicated. /images/graemlins/wink.gif
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Just on a hello basis, no kissing /images/graemlins/smile.gif. Wanted to take her out to a cafe but I don't want my face in those celebrity magazines.
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Would you just admit you can't get her instead of making up lame excuses?
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/images/graemlins/smile.gif Might well be. But I dated a celebrity earlier and when I look back at it, it was the worst time of my life. In a relationship the man needs to feel a bit smarter and stronger than the woman, not like the loser nobody understands why she is hanging out with (as I felt then).
I stopped doing kiss-hellos in my building, and now practically everyone treats me as if I committed a war-crime.
private joker
10-01-2005, 07:53 AM
I liked this thread better when it was called...
http://my.netian.com/~mfjbrsh/hill.jpg
Well she can, I am not implying that this one has fallen for me, but somehow I have always managed to get chicks way above my league. I asked a very sexy girl (top 1%) about it and she said that it is so rare that any man has the guts to approach her, nobody had done it to her in years, so that whoever did it had a great chance of success just from showing the courage.
Dave G.
10-01-2005, 08:52 AM
Since she's not a snob and doesn't act better than everyone, you should let her live in peace. I think it would be pretty crappy to use that as a selling point. Ask yourself this: do you think you could approach her about this and ask for her approval? If the answer is no, then don't do it behind her back.
Everyone needs time away from their busy life, time away from all the stress, and that's her place. You'd hate it if someone took that away from you when you just wanted a chance to relax.
But at least make sure you bang her before you leave.
Edit: I guess the name you chose is part of your question, you're asking if you're being too much of a nice guy. Now I know the wisdom about scoring chicks is never to be a nice guy and that's true, but that doesn't mean you have to be a selfish prick either. Do the right thing. Then bang her.
The Truth
10-01-2005, 08:58 AM
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I stopped doing kiss-hellos in my building, and now practically everyone treats me as if I committed a war-crime.
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nice.
-blake
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I think it would be pretty crappy to use that as a selling point.
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In real estate it is all about location, location, location, and sometimes that includes who your neighbors are. Why should he accept less than the true value of his property by concealing a truthful fact about this desirable location?
Jimbo
10-01-2005, 09:09 AM
She is a look-alike, an imposter. You had better take the money and run before the property value decreases so advertise away.
How on earth would this famous celebrity be able to conceal her identity for even a few days? Something is rotten in Denmark.
Dave G.
10-01-2005, 09:10 AM
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In real estate it is all about location, location, location, and sometimes that includes who your neighbors are. Why should he accept less than the true value of his property by concealing a truthful fact about this desirable location?
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Because it's the right thing to do.
Don't name her.
Is this in London? Initials RS by any chance?
The Armchair
10-01-2005, 10:20 AM
Tell her about your dilemma and ask her if she knows of anyone else who wants a hideaway apartment.
jakethebake
10-01-2005, 10:31 AM
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I liked this thread better when it was called...
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I liked it less when it was called that.
Dear toonicegay,
Killing silently is a tall order, but a quick look at an anatomy chart will show that the larynx is an easy enough target—providing you can make a stealthy submerged approach, sneak up on your victim, and catch him unaware. Once that's accomplished, grasp his hair as close to the scalp as you're able to and yank his head back while using your Ka-Bar combat knife to make a lateral cut across his throat. Make sure you sever both the carotid artery and jugular vein while piercing the windpipe, and press hard; the larynx is a tough, rubbery piece of tissue.
I don't understand why you won't say the name. No one knows where you live, so what's the danger? This is such bs.
theben
10-01-2005, 11:30 AM
go for it. shes a celeb, it comes with the territory
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I don't understand why you won't say the name. No one knows where you live, so what's the danger? This is such bs.
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Because it has no relevance to the ethics of this.
If keeping quiet is going to cost you $50,000, you would be a moron to keep quiet. You didn't sign any secrecy oath.
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I think it would be pretty crappy to use that as a selling point.
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In real estate it is all about location, location, location, and sometimes that includes who your neighbors are. Why should he accept less than the true value of his property by concealing a truthful fact about this desirable location?
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Somehow you are right. A lot of people advertise with affluent neighbourhood, famous people living nearby etc... I think I would do too if I knew that somebody famous lived in the area. It is that she behaves very symphatetic and friendly and she might lose life quality that makes me wonder. If she had been a snob or I did not like her I would not hesitate. Guess that shows it is a selfish issue after all, I am trying to make myself feel good about my actions.
Thanks for all advice, still as split on my decision though /images/graemlins/frown.gif.
What has come to my mind now is that she actually makes a living out of publicity though and thus should not expect that much privacy (it is the argument the paparazzis use though /images/graemlins/crazy.gif).
Jdanz
10-01-2005, 12:02 PM
not only are you going to make life harder for her, but you'll make life harder for everyone else living in the building who will have to live with someone willing to pay a high price to stalk someone.
You screw everyone in what seems like a very nice building over in a huge way.
You certainly will be an [censored] if you do use her status but you'll likely get some money for it.
It's an ethical no brainer insomuch as it's simply the wrong thing to do, but most people will be unethical for a certain price. Is this your price? From the tone of your responses i'd imagine it's not.
Pyromaniac
10-01-2005, 12:08 PM
everyone defines this differently, so you'll have to add your own framework. but:
if she were "your friend", how would you feel about it?
That seems to be the grey area here. I'm guessing. She's not a complete (and/or arrogant) stranger. She's not a good/close friend, either. If she were one of those two, I think you'd have an easier answer.
Money isn't everything. And yet, money can be *quite a lot*, too, especially when the lack of it is stopping you from having the sort of freedom you might want.
I'm not sure what I would do in the same situation. But I think that's largely irrelevant. What matters is what you do. (I will say, though, that it sounds like you're starting to just rationalize...)
Here's a thought. If you can do it without coming across as an ass. Why not tell her you're having a hard time selling your place. Ask her if she knows anyone who's looking for a place. Or if her father would like to buy it and sublet it. Or whatever. Be the genuine nice guy about it and see what happens. (Obviously you have to be totally open about it. Otherwise it just comes across as a blackmail attempt. Which I'm not suggesting.)
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but you'll make life harder for everyone else living in the building who will have to live with someone willing to pay a high price to stalk someone.
You screw everyone in what seems like a very nice building over in a huge way.
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Haven't thought of this aspect before, actually. Some of the other residents there have been very helpful to me in tough times (much more than you can really expect from your neighbours). It tipped the scale, I have made up my mind.
Thanks.
Pyromaniac
10-01-2005, 12:14 PM
really good points. ultimately, if you're looking out for someone other than just yourself, this is sort of the way to think about things. to say, "okay, how can I sell my place and not screw up the nice building that I'm leaving?"
because, too, you're just as likely to sell it to someone random who's going to be an ass once he moves in, too. Perhaps it's more important *who* you sell to than *how much*. But maybe if you ask around the building someone else there will know someone cool to join the community.
*shrug* I know this is all so much easier to say, as not-the-person-dealing-with-it, than to do.
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That seems to be the grey area here. I'm guessing. She's not a complete (and/or arrogant) stranger. She's not a good/close friend, either. If she were one of those two, I think you'd have an easier answer.
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You hit the nail on the head. But a few of the other ones living there are not in the grey area, they are my geniune friends (actually one of them is the person I trust the most on this planet). So as another poster pointed out, I would do bad against them, and I won't, so the decision is thus made.
PokerBob
10-01-2005, 01:05 PM
why the hell would you move?
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I don't understand why you won't say the name. No one knows where you live, so what's the danger? This is such bs.
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Because it has no relevance to the ethics of this.
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Oh, I didn't know we were still going on with this ethics bs. If you honestly came to OOT to decide what your ethical actions should be then you're an idiot.
Jdanz
10-01-2005, 01:09 PM
why? there some pretty insightful people on 2+2.
GuyOnTilt
10-01-2005, 01:17 PM
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why? there some pretty insightful people on 2+2.
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Don't mind him. He's just grumpy his team is about to blow their season.
GoT
Justin A
10-01-2005, 01:18 PM
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That seems to be the grey area here. I'm guessing. She's not a complete (and/or arrogant) stranger. She's not a good/close friend, either. If she were one of those two, I think you'd have an easier answer.
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You hit the nail on the head. But a few of the other ones living there are not in the grey area, they are my geniune friends (actually one of them is the person I trust the most on this planet). So as another poster pointed out, I would do bad against them, and I won't, so the decision is thus made.
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I think you're doing the right thing.
BottlesOf
10-01-2005, 01:23 PM
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If you honestly came to OOT to decide what your ethical actions should be then you're an idiot.
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Clarkmeister
10-01-2005, 01:30 PM
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Dear toonicegay,
Killing silently is a tall order, but a quick look at an anatomy chart will show that the larynx is an easy enough target—providing you can make a stealthy submerged approach, sneak up on your victim, and catch him unaware. Once that's accomplished, grasp his hair as close to the scalp as you're able to and yank his head back while using your Ka-Bar combat knife to make a lateral cut across his throat. Make sure you sever both the carotid artery and jugular vein while piercing the windpipe, and press hard; the larynx is a tough, rubbery piece of tissue.
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Very well done.
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Oh, I didn't know we were still going on with this ethics bs. If you honestly came to OOT to decide what your ethical actions should be then you're an idiot.
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If I would make a poll, or make something like "OOT decide for me" I would be an idiot. Asking for input and then considering if it makes sense is a different story. In fact it was to great help, I noticed this question really has bothered me a lot lately and I feel better now. Needed someone to tell me "you greedy [censored], do what's right", and my friends did not have the guts to do that.
astroglide
10-01-2005, 01:39 PM
you shouldn't tell anybody but us (if this is actually true)
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why? there some pretty insightful people on 2+2.
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Don't mind him. He's just grumpy his team is about to blow their season.
GoT
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3-0 in the top of the first. Suck it!
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If you honestly came to OOT to decide what your ethical actions should be then you're an idiot.
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Listening to OOT advice is going to cost this guy $50,000.
I nominate him for OOT Fish of the Year.
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Listening to OOT advice is going to cost this guy $50,000.
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Did you just decide to pluck this number out of thin air?
I can't believe there's any debate on this. I also can't believe your friends wouldn't flatly give you the correct answer.
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Listening to OOT advice is going to cost this guy $50,000.
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Did you just decide to pluck this number out of thin air?
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Well the OP said the price range is around 200-300K, and he is not getting any good offers. So 50K seems a good guess until the OP gives us a better figure.
OK. I was thinking around $20k below the asking price, if not less.
I still believe it would be a low thing to do to 'out' this woman who is obviously trying very hard to fit in at this place and enjoy a low-key lifestyle.
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Well the OP said the price range is around 200-300K, and he is not getting any good offers. So 50K seems a good guess until the OP gives us a better figure.
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Actually I have no clue how big the effect would be. I was starting to imagine a scenario where 2 or more people with cash would start fighting to get it, at least somebody wanting to buy it to brag.
masse75
10-01-2005, 02:25 PM
How is Bea Arthur doing? Tell her I said hi.
Blarg
10-01-2005, 02:35 PM
This is an ethical no brainer. Don't tell anyone; it would be a scumbag thing to do in general, but especially so since you say the woman is both nice in general and has been nice to you personally. She doesn't deserve betrayal or having her privacy exploited for profit.
What's more, as you note, there's even the chance of drawing someone creepy or dangerous. How would you feel if you sold to some weirdo who wound up raping her or in any way threatening her or any other people in the building?
mmbt0ne
10-01-2005, 02:39 PM
My initial guesses were Hilary Duff or Ashlee Simpson. However, I thought this guy sounded British, what between "flat" and "neighbour," so Yeti's Rachel Stevens guess is pretty good too.
newfant
10-01-2005, 03:07 PM
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Boys’ bits
Despite the Sport Relief stuff you won’t be seeing a Rachel Stevens exercise video any time soon. She confesses that - despite having a posh gym in her apartment building - she’s not very athletic and has been slacking off. “I’ve no excuse,” she tells us sheepishly. “But you know - busy life!”
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http://www.somethingjewish.co.uk/articles/1037_revealing_rachel.htm
Leave it to OOT. We'll out the bitch for you.
gildwulf
10-01-2005, 03:14 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Dear toonicegay,
Killing silently is a tall order, but a quick look at an anatomy chart will show that the larynx is an easy enough target—providing you can make a stealthy submerged approach, sneak up on your victim, and catch him unaware. Once that's accomplished, grasp his hair as close to the scalp as you're able to and yank his head back while using your Ka-Bar combat knife to make a lateral cut across his throat. Make sure you sever both the carotid artery and jugular vein while piercing the windpipe, and press hard; the larynx is a tough, rubbery piece of tissue.
[/ QUOTE ]
I laughed for about 5 minutes. Nice Onion reference.
tonypaladino
10-01-2005, 03:16 PM
It is completely uneccesary to have a gimmick account for this question.
How dare you? How dare you trade on (http://www.thesuperficial.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=4432) Rachel Steven's fame? She's actually one of the few decent celebrities out there. So in your mind it's OK to expose a celebrity to stalkers if it means you might earn a few extra bucks?
You disgust me.
ThaSaltCracka
10-01-2005, 09:40 PM
shut the [censored] up.
Jerk.
You guys are losers. No way Rachel would have anything to do with any of you needlepenises. The first poster has probably never even talked to her.
ThaSaltCracka
10-01-2005, 10:49 PM
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Jerk.
You guys are losers. No way Rachel would have anything to do with any of you needlepenises. The first poster has probably never even talked to her.
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damn, you are cold. 99% of the people on this board don't even know who the [censored] she is.
MyTurn2Raise
10-01-2005, 11:59 PM
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Jerk.
You guys are losers. No way Rachel would have anything to do with any of you needlepenises. The first poster has probably never even talked to her.
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who the [censored] is she? Until she does it in the modern world, she's a nobody. Probably dated a soccer guy.
TheCroShow
10-02-2005, 01:48 PM
she was part of a british pop group, they had their own tv show. their shows aired on canadian tv, she's pretty freakin hot. rachel > alba
Clarkmeister
10-02-2005, 01:53 PM
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Jerk.
You guys are losers. No way Rachel would have anything to do with any of you needlepenises. The first poster has probably never even talked to her.
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Then there's no issue with him advertising that she lives in the building, eh?
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