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Cunning Linguist
09-30-2005, 01:38 PM
So I've been dating this girl since early september and she announced to me the other day that she is still a virgin. In case it is pertinent, she turned 19 in August and I am 23. There is nothing wrong with this girl, no deformities or ugliness, in case you're wondering. She told me last night she wants to bone (not quite verbatim).

This piece of information puts forth a difficult moral dilemma for me.
You see, I like this girl, sort of. She likes me a whole f'n lot. She also thinks I like her much more than I actually do. I enjoy spending time with her, and she's attractive to me, but I don't see this lasting very long. I doubt it lasts until Halloween. I do wish I liked her more, there's just something missing.

This girl likes me much more than she should after only one month. If I pop her cherry, she's probably going to think we're going to be together forever (she's a bit clingy) and tell me she loves me, etc. etc.

So, am I a pussy for not jamming her?
Would you take a girls virginity if you really didn't think it wouldn't last?

PS. Assume you're not a desprit, sex-depraved OOT'iot.

M2d
09-30-2005, 01:40 PM
[ QUOTE ]
This girl likes me much more than she should after only one month. If I pop her cherry, she's probably going to think we're going to be together forever (she's a bit clingy) and tell me she loves me, etc. etc.

[/ QUOTE ]
run
far
quickly

jakethebake
09-30-2005, 01:40 PM
SIIHP

LetYouDown
09-30-2005, 01:40 PM
[ QUOTE ]
PS. Assume you're not a desprit, sex-depraved OOT'iot.

[/ QUOTE ]
You really lowered your sample size with that request.

PoBoy321
09-30-2005, 01:41 PM
[ QUOTE ]

So, am I a pussy for not jamming her?

[/ QUOTE ]

Do you mean, do I think you're a pussy for not taking advantage of a girl who's infatuated with you and willing to give up something that she's been saving her entire life for someone special, who she wrongly thinks is you?

codewarrior
09-30-2005, 01:41 PM
Yes. Yes you should. Dumbass.

MrTrik
09-30-2005, 01:41 PM
[ QUOTE ]
S
So, am I a pussy for not jamming her?

[/ QUOTE ]

Affirmative.

pearljam
09-30-2005, 01:41 PM
It depends on your basic life principles, if you care about this girl and generally try to be a good person you really shouldnt do it. If you want to be a self centered prick the rest of your life go ahead and tap it though.

09-30-2005, 01:41 PM
Doing this will add minimum 6 months on to your relationship if you don't plan on being a d!ck about it. 4 months if you are a smooth-talker. 3 months if you are smooth and start working your magic ASAP.

If she wants to do it just to get it over with, then by all means, be the one.

PoBoy321
09-30-2005, 01:43 PM
[ QUOTE ]

If she wants to do it just to get it over with, then by all means, be the one.

[/ QUOTE ]

I will completely agree with this, but based on the OP, it doesn't seem like it's the case, although in fairness, it's likely that her infatuation is just as a result of her desperate need to get laid.

Shajen
09-30-2005, 01:43 PM
Dude, you need to extricate yourself from this situation as soon as you can.

She'll get more clingy the farther you try to distance yourself from her, so expect it and be aware.

There is nothing very cool about devirginizing a chick. I've done it a couple times, and other than the "I took her virginity" it pretty much wasn't very good.

Would you take a girls virginity if you really didn't think it wouldn't last?

I have, and it wasn't worth it. Headaches galore.

Indiana
09-30-2005, 01:43 PM
Dont do it man. Dont do it. I'm sorry about playing the moral police but a little play aint worth feeling guilty for the next 50 yrs. Personally Id feel better about paying a prostitute.

Indy

bdohaney
09-30-2005, 01:43 PM
Dude... Either you do, or someone else will... So... I am going to need her name, address and phone #.

09-30-2005, 01:44 PM
don't do it man....if she's waited this long, let her first time be with someone who actually cares about her and wants to be with her. you can have random sex with some other girl. she's already clingy, if you have sex with her, you're going to give her even more psychological problems...it will be alot easier to end things with her if you don't sleep with her

imported_The Vibesman
09-30-2005, 01:44 PM
[ QUOTE ]
PS. Assume you're not a desprit, sex-depraved OOT'iot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Bah. Ya lost me.

Reqtech
09-30-2005, 01:46 PM
Some guy is going to come around and make her hate men. Might as well be you.

Patrick del Poker Grande
09-30-2005, 01:46 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

So, am I a pussy for not jamming her?

[/ QUOTE ]

Do you mean, do I think you're a pussy for not taking advantage of a girl who's infatuated with you and willing to give up something that she's been saving her entire life for someone special, who she wrongly thinks is you?

[/ QUOTE ]
She's got to learn some time.

hoopsie44
09-30-2005, 01:48 PM
Very tough laydown.

steelcmg
09-30-2005, 01:48 PM
Hit that and right after u blow a load dump her. This should put her into the real world.Its never as perfect for the girls first time as they think it will be.

touchfaith
09-30-2005, 01:51 PM
punt

renodoc
09-30-2005, 01:51 PM
I think Steel's avatar should give you some inspiration for this girl.

jakethebake
09-30-2005, 01:51 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Do you mean, do I think you're a pussy for not taking advantage of a girl who's infatuated with you and willing to give up something that she's been saving her entire life for someone special, who she wrongly thinks is you?

[/ QUOTE ]

There's a flipside to that. He's going to dump her w/o having sex with her. She's going to be on the rebound and find some total jerk that doesn't care anything about her. It sounds like she's a nice girl and you care about her. There's nothing wrong with making her first time a nice experience, even if the relationship doesn't last forever.

Brock Landers
09-30-2005, 01:52 PM
If you want to have very uncomfortable, overly emotional, and probably unsatisfying sex followed by her getting MUCH more clingy and very hard to dump, then GO FOR IT SPORTO!

M2d
09-30-2005, 01:55 PM
[ QUOTE ]
There's a flipside to that. He's going to dump her w/o having sex with her. She's going to be on the rebound and find some total jerk that doesn't care anything about her. It sounds like she's a nice girl and you care about her. There's nothing wrong with making her first time a nice experience, even if the relationship doesn't last forever.

[/ QUOTE ]
then, you come back and hit it for some no-strings sex. the first time pressures are off, so the potential guilt is gone. plus, maybe she'll learn a thing or two and make the experience fun for OP.

PoBoy321
09-30-2005, 01:55 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Do you mean, do I think you're a pussy for not taking advantage of a girl who's infatuated with you and willing to give up something that she's been saving her entire life for someone special, who she wrongly thinks is you?


[/ QUOTE ] There's a flipside to that. He's going to dump her w/o having sex with her. She's going to be on the rebound and find some total jerk that doesn't care anything about her. It sounds like she's a nice girl and you care about her. There's nothing wrong with making her first time a nice experience, even if the relationship doesn't last forever.

[/ QUOTE ]

It's a valid point, but I think that going into it knowing full well that you're going to dump her right after isn't much better. At least if she has sex with some random jerk, she knows she's having sex with some random jerk, she doesn't think that she's having sex with the love of her life who, in reality, wants to get rid of her the first chance he gets.

Sephus
09-30-2005, 01:56 PM
why the [censored] do you care what we would do? seriously. what's the point of posting this?

it sounds like you think this is a moral question. you really want OOT to help guide you morally? you care if OOT thinks something makes you a pussy?

PITTM
09-30-2005, 01:57 PM
ram it and jam it!!!

rj

HopeydaFish
09-30-2005, 01:58 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Hit that and right after u blow a load dump her. This should put her into the real world.Its never as perfect for the girls first time as they think it will be.

[/ QUOTE ]

You left out the part about "accidentally" SIIHP. Oooh...and if he can see his way to contracting some kind of STD beforehand to pass on to her, that'll be the coup de grace /images/graemlins/smile.gif

In all seriousness, she sounds like a nice girl...but very naive and lovestruck. Don't do it unless your feelings start to change for her and you think that there might be some kind of future that extends more than a few months. You sound like you have a conscience, and doing this to her would weigh on you. Besides, the sex probably won't be good, considering how inexperienced she is.

diebitter
09-30-2005, 01:59 PM
Just pop her, for goodness sakes. Do it gently, be respectful, make it pleasant for her, but ease up on the frequency of seeing her very gradually. This makes you a nice guy, and you'll feel good about it, and she won't feel too bad either.

whiskeytown
09-30-2005, 01:59 PM
dude.....go watch Wedding Crashers -

live and learn - I would NOT hit that - even if the girl was a knockout, if I wasn't ready for her to fall in love and get serious....

UNLESS she's about to go to college - something about virginity and a woman...she hangs onto it in High School like it was gold, and then before she goes off to college she wants that puppy GONE and buried.

RB

TheWorstPlayer
09-30-2005, 01:59 PM
I've done it. It was good. Do it.

PokerGoblin
09-30-2005, 02:07 PM
First off I respect your morality about this.

This is what I would do:

I would say:

"I think you're a cool chick who deserves a wonderful experience for your first time. As good as it makes me feel that you think of me this way, I think you should know that if we do it, it doesn't necessarily validate the relationship like you think it is going to. We haven't been dating that long, and I personally don't necessarily think this going to be a long term thing and I don't want to take advantage of you. If you want to have sex, I am not going to turn you down, but I don't want you to have false expectations about our relationship."

You've been honest with yourself, now be honest with her and put the ball in her court with all the facts. If she's still cool with it with after you've put the relationship in the proper perspective, give it to her. That way you'll be able to live with yourself no matter what the outcome.


The 'Goblin will now go back to his regularly scheduled obnoxiousness.

PG

mmbt0ne
09-30-2005, 02:07 PM
http://www.visitnumber54.co.uk/images/pound%20sign.jpg

http://www.donkeys.net/images/SantanaRightWa.jpg

http://www.madlantern.com/clipart/clips/construction/hammer.gif

diebitter
09-30-2005, 02:10 PM
[ QUOTE ]
First off I respect your morality about this.

This is what I would do:

I would say:

"I think you're a cool chick who deserves a wonderful experience for your first time. As good as it makes me feel that you think of me this way, I think you should know that if we do it, it doesn't necessarily validate the relationship like you think it is going to. We haven't been dating that long, and I personally don't necessarily think this going to be a long term thing and I don't want to take advantage of you. If you want to have sex, I am not going to turn you down, but I don't want you to have false expectations about our relationship."

You've been honest with yourself, now be honest with her and put the ball in her court with all the facts. If she's still cool with it with after you've put the relationship in the proper perspective, give it to her. That way you'll be able to live with yourself no matter what the outcome.


The 'Goblin will now go back to his regularly scheduled obnoxiousness.

PG

[/ QUOTE ]
ya, make her feel cherished and special, but not yet the love of your life (or you hers) before you jump on her bones and pork her brains out.

PoBoy321
09-30-2005, 02:12 PM
Is that supposed to be "Pound that ass"? I don't think that's a common idiom.

Weatherhead03
09-30-2005, 02:13 PM
[ QUOTE ]
I've done it. It wasn't all its cracked up to be. Don't it.

[/ QUOTE ]

chuddo
09-30-2005, 02:13 PM
[ QUOTE ]
why the [censored] do you care what we would do? seriously. what's the point of posting this?

it sounds like you think this is a moral question. you really want OOT to help guide you morally? you care if OOT thinks something makes you a pussy?

[/ QUOTE ]

sephus, with threads like these a lot of the time OP isn't asking oot to vote and decide for him, but is curious about how others view the situation.

it also generates discussion as people would go about it differently.

if it weren't for the random thread like this, 100% of the focus would be devoted to "Lindsay Lohan vs. Taco Bell Chalupas vs. Schindler's List vs. The Beatles".

PoBoy321
09-30-2005, 02:14 PM
[ QUOTE ]
http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00076HUUK.01-AQU00LJPJXM94._SCMZZZZZZZ_.jpg

http://www.donkeys.net/images/SantanaRightWa.jpg


[/ QUOTE ]


FYP

mmbt0ne
09-30-2005, 02:14 PM
</font><blockquote><font class="small">En réponse à:</font><hr />
Is that supposed to be "Pound that ass"?

[/ QUOTE ]

You're ~60% of the way there...

samjjones
09-30-2005, 02:15 PM
Do it, and immediately start acting like the biggest a-hole on the planet afterwards. She will then begin associating sex with feelings of being used, and will either 1) become a lesbian eventually, or 2) become the biggest ho-bag in your neighborhood. Either way, we win.

Richie Rich
09-30-2005, 02:16 PM
[ QUOTE ]
This piece of information puts forth a difficult moral dilemma for me.
You see, I like this girl, sort of. She likes me a whole f'n lot. She also thinks I like her much more than I actually do. I enjoy spending time with her, and she's attractive to me, but I don't see this lasting very long. I doubt it lasts until Halloween. I do wish I liked her more, there's just something missing.

This girl likes me much more than she should after only one month. If I pop her cherry, she's probably going to think we're going to be together forever (she's a bit clingy) and tell me she loves me, etc. etc.

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
So, am I a pussy for not jamming her?
Would you take a girls virginity if you really didn't think it wouldn't last?

[/ QUOTE ]

Haven't read the other posts, yet. But I think you just answered your own question.

09-30-2005, 02:16 PM
Get a friend of yours to talk to her about it. Keep the virgin away from your closet and your friends diaphragm though.

Namdrahsirhc
09-30-2005, 02:16 PM
Theres 2 ways to go about this and they all depend on what kinda person you are.

1. SIIHP - If you say that she's clingy now, wait till after the first time. She'll be in love and you'll be stuck, unless youre a dick

2. Don't SIIHP - Just go your seperate ways and maybe get a BJ or something.

Aside: This is from my personal experience, as i am in a relationship with a similar girl. I'm 20 and she just turned 19. She was a virgin when I met her, and she isn't now. I don't really love her but she loves me (she says so anyway). However, I just don't have the heart to break up with her, and the sex is good, so im stuck

diebitter
09-30-2005, 02:17 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I've done it. It wasn't all its cracked up to be. Don't it.

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]
I dunno. It's a bit tight the first 2 times, but then you got pussy that fits you perfectly. There's a lot to be said for that. Actually, I hate to be boring, but stick to the missionary/her on top but facing you for a while as well, cos once you start changing, it will get a little stretched out of shape, and you'll miss the snug fit.

SGS
09-30-2005, 02:18 PM
No you can't do it for two reasons. Number one is she likes you way more than you like her and by [censored] her you cement the feeling she has and she thinks you feel the same way. Number two she likes you a ton and if you do [censored] her she will cling to you like none other and think she loves you. Not a good situation for poon if you ask me.

SGS

krimson
09-30-2005, 02:21 PM
How the hell does someone with the name "cunning linguist" have to ask if he should hit it?!?!?

RunDownHouse
09-30-2005, 02:23 PM
I'm with Jake and Patrick on this one. In all seriousness, you'll probably be doing her a favor.

KaneKungFu123
09-30-2005, 02:23 PM
express these sentiments to her, she'll probally hop on anyways.

shant
09-30-2005, 02:32 PM
I was in this exact same situation and I popped it. The repercussions were nowhere near as bad as I had envisioned. We broke up like 3 months later and it wasn't a big deal.

The Truth
09-30-2005, 02:36 PM
I've been in your spot 3 times. I did it the first 2 times. 1st was god awful, she went crazy when we broke it off. 2nd one I ended up having to stay with her 8 months longer than I wanted too.

Sex aint THAT much fun.

-blake

TheWorstPlayer
09-30-2005, 02:38 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I've done it. It wasn't all its cracked up to be. Don't it.

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]
I dunno. It's a bit tight the first 2 times, but then you got pussy that fits you perfectly. There's a lot to be said for that. Actually, I hate to be boring, but stick to the missionary/her on top but facing you for a while as well, cos once you start changing, it will get a little stretched out of shape, and you'll miss the snug fit.

[/ QUOTE ]
I agree with this. I did this and then found out she was pretty freaky which was great. And since I was her first, there was always that special connection. The sex was great.

STLantny
09-30-2005, 02:40 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Dude, you need to extricate yourself from this situation as soon as you can.

She'll get more clingy the farther you try to distance yourself from her, so expect it and be aware.

There is nothing very cool about devirginizing a chick. I've done it a couple times, and other than the "I took her virginity" it pretty much wasn't very good.

Would you take a girls virginity if you really didn't think it wouldn't last?

I have, and it wasn't worth it. Headaches galore.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yep, what he said, more trouble than its worth.

Chief911
09-30-2005, 02:44 PM
There needs to be pics posted before a correct assessment can be made.

09-30-2005, 02:46 PM
This is so easy. Just do whatever you want. If you want to bang her for a while and therefore extend the relationship than go for it.

Obviously if you feel like it's a chore to bang her than it isn't worth it for that reason. But this whole cherry-popping thing is retarded.

Listen: She said she wants to have sex. She means it. If you dump her now then she will get a new bf and in a month tell him she wants sex. She isn't friggan saving it for the man of her dreams anymore.

Just do what you want. That said, I'd have sex with her and see if I could teach her to do things the way I like. Might prolong the relationship.

P.S. All the idiots who said you would regret taking her virginity for the next 50 years when it doesn't work out are complete imbeciles.

wayabvpar
09-30-2005, 02:47 PM
[ QUOTE ]
http://www.visitnumber54.co.uk/images/pound%20sign.jpg

http://www.donkeys.net/images/SantanaRightWa.jpg

http://www.madlantern.com/clipart/clips/construction/hammer.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

OMG, I nearly choked to death laughing. POTD, easily.

mslif
09-30-2005, 02:50 PM
Here is my $.2.
Be honest with her, tell her that you care about her but that you are not in love with her. If she still wants you to do it after that, go for it.

JayLear
09-30-2005, 02:53 PM
[ QUOTE ]
So, am I a pussy for not jamming her?

[/ QUOTE ]
Oh, yeah.

[ QUOTE ]
Would you take a girls virginity if you really didn't think it wouldn't last?

[/ QUOTE ]
Oh, hell yeah!

[ QUOTE ]
PS. Assume you're not a desprit, sex-depraved OOT'iot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh...never mind.

asofel
09-30-2005, 03:01 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Here is my $.2.
Be honest with her, tell her that you care about her but that you are not in love with her. If she still wants you to do it after that, go for it.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think the danger here is that she'll still want to go through with it and saying "i warned you" won't steer him clear of the consequences that seem almost certainly imminenet. You can be honest with someone and do the right thing, putting responsibility on their shoulders, and still have to deal with [censored] in the end.

MCS
09-30-2005, 03:05 PM
[ QUOTE ]
So, am I a pussy for not jamming her?

[/ QUOTE ]

No.

[ QUOTE ]
Would you take a girls virginity if you really didn't think it wouldn't last?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes.

I think you should just tell her how you feel about things. Then if she still wants to bone, you can do it with a clear conscience.

mslif
09-30-2005, 03:06 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Here is my $.2.
Be honest with her, tell her that you care about her but that you are not in love with her. If she still wants you to do it after that, go for it.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think the danger here is that she'll still want to go through with it and saying "i warned you" won't steer him clear of the consequences that seem almost certainly imminenet. You can be honest with someone and do the right thing, putting responsibility on their shoulders, and still have to deal with [censored] in the end.

[/ QUOTE ]

I agree with you and it is a choice that the OP will have to make. As Shant also said previously, the consequences might not be as bad as everyone anticipates. It is definitely a gamble.

uw_madtown
09-30-2005, 03:08 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Here is my $.2.
Be honest with her, tell her that you care about her but that you are not in love with her. If she still wants you to do it after that, go for it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yup.

You basically have four options:

1) Break up with her -- if you're talking about this ending within a month, and that's really how you feel, probably the best option. She won't necessarily end up with some jerk. Having sex with her and breaking up within a few weeks is going to be messy.

2) Do what Gorie said.

3) If you think the relationship still has some potential, then go ahead and do it. This will extend the relationship by at least 3 months, but if you aren't totally averse to that -- if you think you might still grow to like her more than you do -- this isn't a bad thing. If you think there's still potential for something long term, this isn't a bad option.

4) Hit that. Link her to this thread. Post AIM convos, blogs, pictures. OOT hilarity ensues. But you're probably going to hell.



Based on what you've said, I'd say break up with her. The whole "I don't see this lasting til October" really shows that you're not very interested here. She sounds like she'll get clingy, which will make you distance yourself, etc etc. If you're set on this ending sometime soon, you're better off ending it now. Be honest with her and hope for the best.

Reef
09-30-2005, 03:09 PM
fold preflop

Girchuck
09-30-2005, 03:15 PM
How are you going to pop her cherry by SIIHP?

VarlosZ
09-30-2005, 03:36 PM
[ QUOTE ]
You see, I like this girl, sort of. She likes me a whole f'n lot. She also thinks I like her much more than I actually do.

[/ QUOTE ]

Popping her cherry under false pretenses is not cool. Explain that you 'like her, sort of' (but say it nicer than that, of course), and see how she feels.

bernie
09-30-2005, 04:22 PM
No.

The sex is usually bad, she usually cries (and bleeds), you can't get rid of her afterwards as she'll be even more clingy. Too much work and crap to deal with.

b

jakethebake
09-30-2005, 04:23 PM
[ QUOTE ]
How are you going to pop her cherry by SIIHP?

[/ QUOTE ]

it was an alternative plan.

Sephus
09-30-2005, 04:24 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
why the [censored] do you care what we would do? seriously. what's the point of posting this?

it sounds like you think this is a moral question. you really want OOT to help guide you morally? you care if OOT thinks something makes you a pussy?

[/ QUOTE ]

sephus, with threads like these a lot of the time OP isn't asking oot to vote and decide for him, but is curious about how others view the situation.

it also generates discussion as people would go about it differently.

if it weren't for the random thread like this, 100% of the focus would be devoted to "Lindsay Lohan vs. Taco Bell Chalupas vs. Schindler's List vs. The Beatles".

[/ QUOTE ]

oh yeah this thread totally breaks new ground for OOT.

TheBlueMonster
09-30-2005, 04:24 PM
[ QUOTE ]
This girl likes me much more than she should after only one month. If I pop her cherry, she's probably going to think we're going to be together forever (she's a bit clingy) and tell me she loves me, etc. etc.

[/ QUOTE ]
that's exactly what will happen

savman
09-30-2005, 04:29 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Dude, you need to extricate yourself from this situation as soon as you can.

She'll get more clingy the farther you try to distance yourself from her, so expect it and be aware.

There is nothing very cool about devirginizing a chick. I've done it a couple times, and other than the "I took her virginity" it pretty much wasn't very good.

Would you take a girls virginity if you really didn't think it wouldn't last?

I have, and it wasn't worth it. Headaches galore.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yep, what he said, more trouble than its worth.

[/ QUOTE ]

i couldnt agree more. clingy girl will transform to psyco bitch the minute u tap it and try and leave anytime in her lifetime.

BobboFitos
09-30-2005, 05:28 PM
siihp

theben
09-30-2005, 05:30 PM
[ QUOTE ]
If I pop her cherry, she's probably going to think we're going to be together forever (she's a bit clingy) and tell me she loves me, etc. etc.


PS. Assume you're not a desprit, sex-depraved OOT'iot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Then the answer is clearly a big NO

if shes a really clingly type person, you are asking for a TON of crap to deal with just to get some. if you are not desparate, there is absolutely no need to deal with her crap. obviously, you could bone her then totally ingore her, but that would be one of the worst things you could possibly to do another human being and certainly garantee you a spot in hell if it actually existed

theben
09-30-2005, 05:33 PM
dont only view this from a "nice guy" POV. also view this from a more selfish, avoiding hassles POV. if you do this, you run into a whole load of [censored]. it may not be worth the hassle

SoloAJ
09-30-2005, 05:47 PM
[ QUOTE ]
At least if she has sex with some random jerk, she knows she's having sex with some random jerk, she doesn't think that she's having sex with the love of her life ...

[/ QUOTE ]

I think you're SERIOUSLY underestimating a greater part of the female population in this age range. They are often so delusional in their own world they don't recognize reality. Why do you think so many random jerks get laid all the time? Girl bones random jerk.....Girl cries when he tells her to piss off.....Girl see a new guy who is a "much better person" than the last...and he turns out to be a random jerk. So goes the cycle.

That said, I don't think you can do it unless you are honest first.

Also, I don't know...what are the emotional repercussions to SIIHP? I mean...will she still be clingy then? I would think if she hates it he gets to SIIHP and have her despise him at the same time. Win/win. Just a thought...I don't approve...

Discuss.

Cunning Linguist
09-30-2005, 05:58 PM
Thanks for the replies. Some of the advice was surprisingly good.

To all of you who said to tell her how i really feel, then possibly jam her anyways, you are very wise. If she doesn't take well to the news, then we break up and that is not a terrible result either. In any case, I'd rather withhold sex until I have a better idea of which way I want to go with her. As I said in OP, I'm really hoping there is more to her than I have seen so far, she has potential.

If I can't control myself in the heat of the moment and end up doing it, I promise a full uncensored trip report of both cherry popping sex and the mess that will ensue if I do decide to break up with her afterwards. It's the least I can do.

antidan444
09-30-2005, 06:13 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Here is my $.2.
Be honest with her, tell her that you care about her but that you are not in love with her. If she still wants you to do it after that, go for it.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think the danger here is that she'll still want to go through with it and saying "i warned you" won't steer him clear of the consequences that seem almost certainly imminenet. You can be honest with someone and do the right thing, putting responsibility on their shoulders, and still have to deal with [censored] in the end.

[/ QUOTE ]

Bullshit.

If I explain to her where I'm coming from, and she makes the choice to still want her cherry popped, and afterwards she tries to pull that [censored], I'm gone without a second of guilt, because she knew the deal in advance.

If that makes me a prick, so be it.

KingCon
09-30-2005, 06:14 PM
Tell her you want to try anal first to prove that she really loves you,pop her anal cherry, then dump her.

09-30-2005, 06:48 PM
You would have to be out of your mind not to do this.

Boris
09-30-2005, 06:53 PM
he does care about her and he does want to be with her. But only until Halloween. I say hit it.

09-30-2005, 07:09 PM
[ QUOTE ]
I promise a full uncensored trip report of both cherry popping sex and the mess that will ensue

[/ QUOTE ]

The word choice here, brilliant, imo

gabbahh
09-30-2005, 08:37 PM
Whether you do her or not, sez a lot about u.
If u take advantage of her u r a loser(IMNSHO).
If u r honest and tell her what u feel for her, then u r a man.
If ya wanna score go to bar and find your 1 night stand.

wonderwes
09-30-2005, 10:16 PM
I would like to think this is a simple answer. You do this, her mind for the rest of her existence will have your name and face burned into memory.

You either care for the girl, or are just waiting for something better. So answer that question, and you got yo answer.

MyTurn2Raise
09-30-2005, 10:29 PM
do it....think of who else might pop her cherry. At least you obviously care for the girl. If you spurn her, she might lower her standards and go for a lesser man. Give her the good, deep dicking she deserves.

ebaudry
09-30-2005, 10:46 PM
Since you could really damage someone's life through something like this, I would approach it as truthfully as possible, saying something that lets her know that you need to have your relationship be a little less serious. You could try to also mention that you would be willing to be "friends with benefits", but that you understand if that would be uncomfortable for her.

I would assume that no matter what you decide to say though, that if you are her first, and she is the clingy-type, that sex is NOT worth it. I f'king love sex, and that scenario simply needs to be turned down if you don't want to have a relationship for a while. Not because it's messed up to sleep with her (who can say?), but because you'll end up hurting her really bad (or really she'll hurt herself, but she'll use you to do it), and that downside ain't worth the upside.

Good luck in any event.

09-30-2005, 10:52 PM
http://www.davethompson.org.uk/images/tinky_winky.jpg

Don't do it!

MarkL444
09-30-2005, 10:52 PM
[ QUOTE ]
So, am I a pussy for not jamming her?

[/ QUOTE ]

no.

Stuey
09-30-2005, 11:35 PM
To many replies to read but here is my answer.

Yes do it.

Here are my reasons.

1. Girls lie she might not even be a virgin. Me and a friend of mine took the same chicks virginity 2 years apart.

2. Virginity becomes a burden to girls after they are 18. You might let her down by breaking it off with her after you do the deed. But if you are not a jerk about it she will be better off as she will be freed of the burden of virginity in her next relationship.

3. I never know how much I like a girl until we have sex. You might end up sticking with her as the sex might bring you closer to her in ways you didn't consider. Plus she might change or open up more after the sex and you might find that very attractive.

Do it you will do worse things I surely have.

jba
10-01-2005, 12:02 AM
[ QUOTE ]
First off I respect your morality about this.

This is what I would do:

I would say:

"I think you're a cool chick who deserves a wonderful experience for your first time. As good as it makes me feel that you think of me this way, I think you should know that if we do it, it doesn't necessarily validate the relationship like you think it is going to. We haven't been dating that long, and I personally don't necessarily think this going to be a long term thing and I don't want to take advantage of you. If you want to have sex, I am not going to turn you down, but I don't want you to have false expectations about our relationship."

You've been honest with yourself, now be honest with her and put the ball in her court with all the facts. If she's still cool with it with after you've put the relationship in the proper perspective, give it to her. That way you'll be able to live with yourself no matter what the outcome.


The 'Goblin will now go back to his regularly scheduled obnoxiousness.

PG

[/ QUOTE ]

this is terrific advice, if you want dry balls

10-01-2005, 01:31 AM
[ QUOTE ]
If I pop her cherry, she's probably going to think we're going to be together forever (she's a bit clingy) and tell me she loves me, etc. etc.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yep.

Clarkmeister
10-01-2005, 01:34 AM
In college I had my roomate's younger sister come to town. Her friend and I started hooking up. She was a few years younger than I (IIRC I was 22 she was 19). She mentioned she was a virgin right in the middle of things starting to cook and I backed off, not wanting to deal with that baggage.

Three months later she had quit school and run off with some dude who knocked her up a few weeks later. Best decision I ever made.

diebitter
10-01-2005, 01:50 AM
[ QUOTE ]
If I can't control myself in the heat of the moment and end up doing it, I promise a full uncensored trip report of both cherry popping sex and the mess that will ensue if I do decide to break up with her afterwards. It's the least I can do.

[/ QUOTE ]

At last, the entertainment's arrived.

The Dude
10-01-2005, 03:27 AM
Don't do it. There are plenty of other girls that don't carry baggage to have sex with. Find one of them, or find someone you're willing to try staying with long enough to work through the baggage.

gildwulf
10-01-2005, 01:58 PM
[ QUOTE ]
"I think you're a cool chick who deserves a wonderful experience for your first time. As good as it makes me feel that you think of me this way, I think you should know that if we do it, it doesn't necessarily validate the relationship like you think it is going to. We haven't been dating that long, and I personally don't necessarily think this going to be a long term thing and I don't want to take advantage of you. If you want to have sex, I am not going to turn you down, but I don't want you to have false expectations about our relationship."

[/ QUOTE ]

Saying this will most likely get you three things:

1) crying
2) no sex
3) more crying

ptmusic
10-01-2005, 02:12 PM
If you can be open to the possibility that YOU might really be interested in her afterwards (it does happen to guys too you know), then go for it.

If you are totally sure there is no chance you'd ever last with her, then don't. You will regret it. But ask yourself - why is there no chance? What is really wrong with her? You said "nothing". If that's true - you're an idiot for not opening your mind up to future possibilities.

-ptmusic

Jersey Nick
10-01-2005, 02:25 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
"I think you're a cool chick who deserves a wonderful experience for your first time. As good as it makes me feel that you think of me this way, I think you should know that if we do it, it doesn't necessarily validate the relationship like you think it is going to. We haven't been dating that long, and I personally don't necessarily think this going to be a long term thing and I don't want to take advantage of you. If you want to have sex, I am not going to turn you down, but I don't want you to have false expectations about our relationship."

[/ QUOTE ]

Saying this will most likely get you three things:

1) crying
2) no sex
3) more crying

[/ QUOTE ]
Which is waaaay better than:
1) Akward messy painful sex (for her) so-so sex (for him)
which will lead to:
2) An unwanted deep emotional attachment
after months of rejection she will become:
3) A stalker

gildwulf
10-01-2005, 03:01 PM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
"I think you're a cool chick who deserves a wonderful experience for your first time. As good as it makes me feel that you think of me this way, I think you should know that if we do it, it doesn't necessarily validate the relationship like you think it is going to. We haven't been dating that long, and I personally don't necessarily think this going to be a long term thing and I don't want to take advantage of you. If you want to have sex, I am not going to turn you down, but I don't want you to have false expectations about our relationship."

[/ QUOTE ]

Saying this will most likely get you three things:

1) crying
2) no sex
3) more crying

[/ QUOTE ]
Which is waaaay better than:
1) Akward messy painful sex (for her) so-so sex (for him)
which will lead to:
2) An unwanted deep emotional attachment
after months of rejection she will become:
3) A stalker

[/ QUOTE ]

Did I recommend having sex with this girl in my post?

EMcWilliams
10-02-2005, 12:35 AM
Thank Steven Tyler for this one...

"Sex is like a gun...you aim, you shoot, haha, you run"

Cunning Linguist
10-02-2005, 10:17 AM
Cherry popped.
Thanks for trying.

May post a trip report later.

jakethebake
10-02-2005, 10:19 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Cherry popped.
Thanks for trying.

May post a trip report later.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm pretty sure we all knew which way this would go before anyone ever posted.

Slow Play Ray
10-02-2005, 10:19 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Cherry popped.
Thanks for trying.

May post a trip report later.

[/ QUOTE ]

congrats!

Yeti
10-02-2005, 10:21 AM
[ QUOTE ]

If I can't control myself in the heat of the moment and end up doing it, I promise a full uncensored trip report of both cherry popping sex and the mess that will ensue if I do decide to break up with her afterwards. It's the least I can do.

[/ QUOTE ]

Don't let us down, son.

gildwulf
10-02-2005, 10:28 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Cherry popped.
Thanks for trying.

May post a trip report later.

[/ QUOTE ]

http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b305/gildwulf/cherry.jpg

wtfsvi
10-02-2005, 11:02 AM
Uhm, be honest with her? If she still wants to sleep with you after she knows you're not in love with her, go ahead.

diebitter
10-02-2005, 11:07 AM
If you keep doing her, can you please post reports on the state/tightness etc of pussy. Include any notes on positions, frequency, nature of the action (soft?hard?), and how this seems to affect pussy.

I have a scientific interest.

jakethebake
10-02-2005, 11:08 AM
[ QUOTE ]
Uhm, be honest with her? If she still wants to sleep with you after she knows you're not in love with her, go ahead.

[/ QUOTE ]

You're a little late.

wtfsvi
10-02-2005, 11:12 AM
Uhm. This makes me look stupid. Didn't read your the posts before I posted /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

Haha, well.

wtfsvi
10-02-2005, 11:13 AM
Yeah, saw that. Made me look kinda stupid.

10-02-2005, 12:26 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Cherry popped.
Thanks for trying.

May post a trip report later.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm glad you didn't puss out like the OOTiots wanted you to. Tell her your feelings, ha! weak.

Felix_Nietsche
10-02-2005, 12:43 PM
Dude... Either you do, or someone else will...
************************************************
Grow some balls and tell her you like her, like spending time with her, and you want to bone her (use the language she used with you when she hinted about it), but you would feel bad about it if things didn't work out because I'm sure you want to do it with the right person.

The beauty of this is 70% of women would probably jump you right there and you can enjoy the experience guilt free. I an totally serious about this. Just be ready to follow thru the 30% of the time they thank you for your honesty but then don't want to **** you.

It is a MAN's world out there if you have a set of BALLS. Quit pussy-footing around and tell her how you feel.

augie00
10-02-2005, 12:59 PM
stay away

cocked&locked
10-02-2005, 01:04 PM
OP says:

[ QUOTE ]
I promise a full uncensored trip report of both cherry popping sex and the mess that will ensue if I do decide to break up with her afterwards. It's the least I can do.

[/ QUOTE ]

and

[ QUOTE ]
Cherry popped.
Thanks for trying.

May post a trip report later.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm no saint, and far be it from me to lecture on morality, but how in the hell can anybody that says these things claim to have any feelings for the girl, or have any common decency.

The original question was fair enough (in content - not in tact), but geesh, you treat her like a common hooker. You are scum.

Ok - let the flames begin.

gorie
10-02-2005, 01:34 PM
[ QUOTE ]
I'm no saint, and far be it from me to lecture on morality, but how in the hell can anybody that says these things claim to have any feelings for the girl, or have any common decency.

The original question was fair enough (in content - not in tact), but geesh, you treat her like a common hooker. You are scum.

Ok - let the flames begin.

[/ QUOTE ]
i agree with you.

jakethebake
10-02-2005, 01:36 PM
[ QUOTE ]
I'm no saint, and far be it from me to lecture on morality, but how in the hell can anybody that says these things claim to have any feelings for the girl, or have any common decency.

The original question was fair enough (in content - not in tact), but geesh, you treat her like a common hooker. You are scum.

Ok - let the flames begin.

[/ QUOTE ]

This was funny.

Cunning Linguist
10-02-2005, 05:07 PM
[ QUOTE ]
i agree with you.

[/ QUOTE ]

Me too.

Dariel86
10-02-2005, 05:28 PM
I was in an exactly same kind of situation. I did not bone here.

ToGreyStreet
10-02-2005, 10:19 PM
[ QUOTE ]
Very tough laydown.

[/ QUOTE ]

touche my friend, but you gotta lay it down

RunDownHouse
10-02-2005, 10:26 PM
An important note: anyone posting in this thread under the age of 24 or so needs to state that at the top of their post. Their advice will be discounted. Anyone under 20 should be disregarded completely.

I'm 23.