How to make someone feel better.

[steelcmg]

So last night my GF calls me up and is upset about her mom. Her mom likes to make her feel bad and always is saying stupid sh it without thinking. She does this to alot of people including me but i just dont care. Im not sure if she gets a kick out of it or just is clueless. Her mom also seems to favor her sister alot more then her. Like she always talks to her sister alot different and always talks about her to people. She also was on a kick of comparing me to her sisters husband. Untill i stoped that.

So my question is how do i make my GF feel better about the situation when i totally agree with how she was feeling about her mom last night. She really started to relize something i have noticed for sometime now. Should i have agreed with her that her mom is a total bitch? or would it have been better to try and tell her that her mom loves her and its all in her head BLA BLA BLA.

[ChipWrecked]

As a married man, I would point out that you want to be careful about statements you make re: your partner's family. While they may be true and she may agree with you at the time, she might come back later and stick you with the fact that you dissed her mom.

Better to try to comfort her w/o making any direct statements about her mother.

[jakethebake]

I would not do either of these. Whatever you do don't agree her mom is a bitch. That will just bite you in the ass later when she and her mom have made up. Also, she can say it. It's her mom, not yours. Don't try to convince her it's in her head either if you don't believe it is.

Try to get her to look past it. We don't get to pick our parents. They are what they are. We generally love them despite their faults. It's just something she'll have to live with. We can let them know that some behavior will not be tolerated. But they are who they are. They raised us and it gives them a little leeway.

Generally, I would just make sure the girl has a shoulder to cry on. Someone to listen. Tell her you're sorry she's sad about this. Try to find something to take her mind off it.

[diebitter]

Just pretend to listen and do non-specific sympathetic stuff - look troubled when she's upset and babbling etc. DO NOT COMMENT in any way on what's happening.

This is doubly true if you're listening to [censored] about 1 half of a couple as spouted the the other half.

[steelcmg]

This whole combo happened over the phone so i listened and made some comments but i dont think i really dissed her mom i agreed that i have noticed she likes to make people feel bad. I really dont think her mom relizes she does it.

[ChipWrecked]

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As a married man, I would point out that you want to be careful about statements you make re: your partner's family. While they may be true and she may agree with you at the time, she might come back later and stick you with the fact that you dissed her mom.

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I would not do either of these. Whatever you do don't agree her mom is a bitch. That will just bite you in the ass later when she and her mom have made up.

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Word up, young brother. Check out how fast the old married guys with scars on their asses said the same thing.

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[steelcmg]

[ QUOTE ]
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As a married man, I would point out that you want to be careful about statements you make re: your partner's family. While they may be true and she may agree with you at the time, she might come back later and stick you with the fact that you dissed her mom.

[/ QUOTE ]

I would not do either of these. Whatever you do don't agree her mom is a bitch. That will just bite you in the ass later when she and her mom have made up.

[/ QUOTE ]

Word up, young brother. Check out how fast the old married guys with scars on their asses said the same thing.

/images/graemlins/wink.gif

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Yea i think i have alot to learn about these types of things.