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View Full Version : A tale of caution


09-12-2005, 03:17 AM
So, today I get a phonecall from some random guy that says that his friend said I like to play cards and he was having a home game. Me and my 2 friends go over to the place and after 30 minutes realize that this is a very easy game and we are having fun, etc.

I go upstairs to use the restroom and just before I unzip my pants, I decide to fart and then feel something warm. I think "Oh [censored]. This is not happening. I've laughed at people's stories about this. This can't be happening to me."

Well, sure enough. There was feces in my boxers. I kinda panic and then decide to just wipe my ass and then I kinda dry the boxers and then try to rinse them in the sink. I then look around for somewhere I can dispose of this. I don't see any trashcans. I go out and sneak into the kitchen, and then bury it at the very end of the trashcan and then go back to the pokergame and sit down, feeling very uncomfortable. I've never sharted before, and I've never gone commando either. This is a really bad experience. I decide this game isn't really worth it and tell them I have to go for a group meeting and then get the hell out of there.

For all those people that fart everyday without thinking twice (like I used to), beware. The shart is real and can strike anyone anywhere.

NLSoldier
09-12-2005, 03:19 AM
[ QUOTE ]
So, today I get a phonecall from some random guy that says that his friend said I like to play cards and he was having a home game. Me and my 2 friends go over to the place and after 30 minutes realize that this is a very easy game and we are having fun, etc.

I go upstairs to use the restroom and just before I unzip my pants, I decide to fart and then feel something warm. I think "Oh [censored]. This is not happening. I've laughed at people's stories about this. This can't be happening to me."

Well, sure enough. There was feces in my boxers. I kinda panic and then decide to just wipe my ass and then I kinda dry the boxers and then try to rinse them in the sink. I then look around for somewhere I can dispose of this. I don't see any trashcans. I go out and sneak into the kitchen, and then bury it at the very end of the trashcan and then go back to the pokergame and sit down, feeling very uncomfortable. I've never sharted before, and I've never gone commando either. This is a really bad experience. I decide this game isn't really worth it and tell them I have to go for a group meeting and then get the hell out of there.

For all those people that fart everyday without thinking twice (like I used to), beware. The shart is real and can strike anyone anywhere.

[/ QUOTE ]

I thought I sharted today while I was peeing but the wipe test came out clean. that was a close call.

Eurotrash
09-12-2005, 03:19 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I think "Oh [censored]..."

[/ QUOTE ]



haha

edfurlong
09-12-2005, 03:20 AM
Thats pretty hot.

Brainwalter
09-12-2005, 03:36 AM
so what's your plan, not fart anymore? Go to the toilet every time? I'm having trouble finding a moral to this tale.

Hal 2000
09-12-2005, 03:41 AM
[ QUOTE ]
I DECIDE to fart

[/ QUOTE ]

This, I believe, was your fatal mistake. If it doesn't come pretty easily, then you're in potential mud-drawing territory

09-12-2005, 03:41 AM
How can you not tell when [censored] will come out? either you have congested bowels or you dont.

Brainwalter
09-12-2005, 03:47 AM
[ QUOTE ]
How can you not tell when [censored] will come out? either you have congested bowels or you dont.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not all will heed this cautionary tale.

tom441lbk
09-12-2005, 03:47 AM
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
So, today I get a phonecall from some random guy that says that his friend said I like to play cards and he was having a home game. Me and my 2 friends go over to the place and after 30 minutes realize that this is a very easy game and we are having fun, etc.

I go upstairs to use the restroom and just before I unzip my pants, I decide to fart and then feel something warm. I think "Oh [censored]. This is not happening. I've laughed at people's stories about this. This can't be happening to me."

Well, sure enough. There was feces in my boxers. I kinda panic and then decide to just wipe my ass and then I kinda dry the boxers and then try to rinse them in the sink. I then look around for somewhere I can dispose of this. I don't see any trashcans. I go out and sneak into the kitchen, and then bury it at the very end of the trashcan and then go back to the pokergame and sit down, feeling very uncomfortable. I've never sharted before, and I've never gone commando either. This is a really bad experience. I decide this game isn't really worth it and tell them I have to go for a group meeting and then get the hell out of there.

For all those people that fart everyday without thinking twice (like I used to), beware. The shart is real and can strike anyone anywhere.

[/ QUOTE ]

I thought I sharted today while I was peeing but the wipe test came out clean. that was a close call.

[/ QUOTE ]


about to be charge for murder 2, b/c i almost died while laughing

09-12-2005, 03:48 AM
http://img372.imageshack.us/img372/3890/c0502226011100bg7dj.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

09-12-2005, 03:51 AM
The wipe test is all that some have left really. It's the only thing keeping them from slipping to a shiity, filthy, putrefaction of existence.

Brainwalter
09-12-2005, 04:14 AM
[ QUOTE ]
http://img372.imageshack.us/img372/3890/c0502226011100bg7dj.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

[/ QUOTE ]

Is this in response to my post?