Sports Noobs against Pros - spawned from tdarko's tennis thread

[bravos1]

OK.. thought this deserved it's own thread...

Here are the rules:

Pick a sport in which you feel any noob (read as : this person has never played this sport before) would have any flying chance at against a pro. Assume noob is an overall decent athlete though.

The game has to be more than just a one time thing like, first to make a free throw, noob shoots first. But things like 10 penalty shots against a goalie in soccer are reasonable.

Here are some possible criteria for various sports.

Tennis - Win one game in 3 sets
Baseball - 3 or more fairballs hit (no bunting) in 27 outs.
Basketball - score 2+ baskets in a race to 15 winner takes out.
Table Tennis - score 2 pts in a 21 pt match
Bowling - within 200 pts in a 3 game match.
Boxing - last 5 rounds
Golf - win 2 holes out of 18, for a total noob even one would be too much I guess.

Let's get creative. Also what would be the worst odds against any pro?

Let's start then...

Someone already mentioned a shootout against a soccer goalie and I think it may be one of the best... pretty much a crapshoot.

Biggest longshot? Probably something like chess if we want to consider that. But oh the possibilites for fun...just for the pleasure of watching.. a 5 round boxing match. Yes, the noob could get lucky, but even getting lucky and hitting the pro, it would still be very unlikely that anything would happen except having the noob get pounded on afterwards.. How about some mixed martial arts fighting like the UFC? That would be great... /images/graemlins/grin.gif

So post your sport and criteria.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

The answer is here (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=3351162&page=0&view=colla psed&sb=5&o=14&fpart=1)

[beta1607]

[ QUOTE ]
Bowling - within 200 pts in a 3 game match.


[/ QUOTE ]

This is the only one a noob would even have any shot at.

[tbach24]

Golf and boxing are out of the question. There's no way that anyone could do those.

[JaBlue]

I'm an athletic dude but not a professional sportsman.

I wouldn't be able to:

score a point in a one on one match against an NBA player

hit a fair ball coming 90+mph (75-80 straight I can hit, but 90 with movement or 80 curve I have no chance).

score a goal against a goalie

win a hole against a golfer

not die playing football

come close to beating a swimmer or track/field athlete

Basically, an untrained amateur has no chance to beat a pro in any sport I can think of.


Maybe if you call competitive eating a sport, the amateur might have a shot.

[bravos1]

[ QUOTE ]
The answer is here (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=3351162&page=0&view=colla psed&sb=5&o=14&fpart=1)

[/ QUOTE ]
Did you not read my full title? That thread is all over the place.. amatuers vs professionals, wagering amounts, tdarko's tennis skills, odds, etc. etc., making it unwieldly a bet to read/follow.

[swede123]

Jablue is right. There is no sport where a complete novice would stand any chance against a pro. Not a single one.

Swede

[bravos1]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm an athletic dude but not a professional sportsman.

I wouldn't be able to:
score a goal against a goalie


[/ QUOTE ]

This I disagree with, a penalty kick against a soccer goalie from anyone who can kick a ball reasonably well would hit the net at least 20% I would guess.

[ QUOTE ]

Maybe if you call competitive eating a sport, the amateur might have a shot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Doubtful, but maybe.. But it sure would be hard to find a true noob at eating.. /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[Huskiez]

[ QUOTE ]
Maybe if you call competitive eating a sport, the amateur might have a shot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Against Kobayashi? No chance.

[swede123]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'm an athletic dude but not a professional sportsman.

I wouldn't be able to:
score a goal against a goalie


[/ QUOTE ]

This I disagree with, a penalty kick against a soccer goalie from anyone who can kick a ball reasonably well would hit the net at least 20% I would guess.



[/ QUOTE ]

While I agree with this you can't call penalty shots a good indication of soccer playing. Likewise, many relative amateurs would stomp Shaq and similar NBA players in a free throw contest, but what does that mean as far as overall hoops skills?

Swede

[bravos1]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'm an athletic dude but not a professional sportsman.

I wouldn't be able to:
score a goal against a goalie


[/ QUOTE ]

This I disagree with, a penalty kick against a soccer goalie from anyone who can kick a ball reasonably well would hit the net at least 20% I would guess.



[/ QUOTE ]

While I agree with this you can't call penalty shots a good indication of soccer playing. Likewise, many relative amateurs would stomp Shaq and similar NBA players in a free throw contest, but what does that mean as far as overall hoops skills?

Swede

[/ QUOTE ]

True, but there are also many amatuers that can beat a random golf pro even after 18 holes. It happens every year in the open events. This is why I stated noob and not amatuer. I doubt that any person that has never shot a freethrow could outshoot even Shaq from the line (debatable). But even if you think about it from an amatuer since, you could take a highschool player and he could potentially beat Shaq in one one one if Shaq was required to dribble and run, etc, but we are not talking about amatuers like LeBron James and Freddy Adu before they turned pro.

[jdl22]

It may be possible to last five rounds in a fight if someone was very fit and did nothing but run around the ring trying not to get hit. If someone actually tried to fight it would not work at all obviously.

[bravos1]

[ QUOTE ]
It may be possible to last five rounds in a fight if someone was very fit and did nothing but run around the ring trying not to get hit. If someone actually tried to fight it would not work at all obviously.

[/ QUOTE ]

Like So?? (http://www.boxingscene.com/media/uploads/13005/lol.gif)

[beckham9]

perhaps table tennis could be done. the boxing would be the hardest by far i would assume. and running away would not work. you see that avatar someone has with the dude who runs over to the ropes and is followed an knocked out?

[mason55]

[ QUOTE ]
perhaps table tennis could be done.

[/ QUOTE ]

bwahaha that would be one of the toughest.

[Dynasty]

[ QUOTE ]
perhaps table tennis could be done.

[/ QUOTE ]

Haven't you ever seen Forrest Gumb. No way a noob could keep up.

As far as boxing goes, the question is whether a noob could last one minute rather than five rounds.

[daveymck]

The only sport I can think of would be motor racing of some sort, wouldnt be close starting together but with some sort of handicap maybe less poweful car or somthing would have a chance. Maybe drag racing?

[asofel]

[ QUOTE ]
The answer is here (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=3351162&page=0&view=colla psed&sb=5&o=14&fpart=1)

[/ QUOTE ]

that's really [censored] funny

[asofel]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Maybe if you call competitive eating a sport, the amateur might have a shot.

[/ QUOTE ]

Against Kobayashi? No chance.

[/ QUOTE ]

i'd like to cast a vote in the "negative chance" column

[Sykes]

[ QUOTE ]
perhaps table tennis could be done.

[/ QUOTE ]

not even a chance. I would wager everything I own and will ever own on the professional in this match. Hell, if the professional was not goofing around and playing his A game, the noob would not even get a single point.

[send_the_msg]

BADMINTON!!!! that is all.

[stabn]

Is there pro curling? Someone might have a chance of getting lucky in that.

[smb394]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Bowling - within 200 pts in a 3 game match.


[/ QUOTE ]

This is the only one a noob would even have any shot at.

[/ QUOTE ]

[Sephus]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
perhaps table tennis could be done.

[/ QUOTE ]

not even a chance. I would wager everything I own and will ever own on the professional in this match. Hell, if the professional was not goofing around and playing his A game, the noob would not even get a single point.

[/ QUOTE ]

i'd go as far to say that the only times the noob would even actually hit the ball onto the pro's side would be on his own serves.

I know this isnt a sport, but poker is probably one of the few games an amatuer actually stands a chance in against a pro.

as for someone mentioning mixed martial art, you could handicap the pro by handcuffing him and dissallowing kicks knees of anysort, and the amatuer would still get worked on straight headbutts.

[ptmusic]

[ QUOTE ]
BADMINTON!!!! that is all.

[/ QUOTE ]

You're nuts. Badminton is one of the most demanding sports around, stamina-wise.

Sports where an athletic noob might have a shot: luge and bobsled.

-ptmusic

[Taraz]

[ QUOTE ]

Tennis - Win one game in 3 sets


[/ QUOTE ]

No chance. Have you ever seen a 120 mph serve? The noob would have to score 4 points in a game. That's just not happening.

[ QUOTE ]

Baseball - 3 or more fairballs hit (no bunting) in 27 outs.


[/ QUOTE ]

Take a random person to the batting cages and have them swing at the 60mph softballs. It's hilarious. No chance a noob hits anything moving 70+ mph with any kind of movement, let alone a 90 mph fastball.

[ QUOTE ]

Basketball - score 2+ baskets in a race to 15 winner takes out.


[/ QUOTE ]

This is more ludicrous than hitting a baseball if that's possible. I'm nowhere close to being a professional and my friends who play ball a couple times a month can't score a point on me. I've actually made multiple $100 bets on this one with people who play basketball and I haven't lost yet. Soooo . . . no chance.

[ QUOTE ]

Table Tennis - score 2 pts in a 21 pt match


[/ QUOTE ]

Has anyone ever tried to return a good table tennis serve? I knew this guy who was the worst player on his high school team in Singapore. I'm not the greatest ping pong player, but it took me over 10 tries to get his serve to just land on the other side of the table. I can't even imagine what playing a pro would be like.

[ QUOTE ]

Bowling - within 200 pts in a 3 game match.


[/ QUOTE ]

This has a chance of happening. If the pro plays really poorly he'll probably get around 700 or so. I guess 500 is doable if you go on a run.

[ QUOTE ]

Boxing - last 5 rounds


[/ QUOTE ]

I would pay to see this one.

[ QUOTE ]

Golf - win 2 holes out of 18, for a total noob even one would be too much I guess.


[/ QUOTE ]

This one might be the hardest of all. Hitting a golf ball cleanly is hard enough for all those rich folk who pay thousands for lessons. Someone picking up a club for the first time has no shot.

Oh and to everyone who thinks scoring on a penalty kick in soccer is that easy, think again. Kicking a soccer ball into the corner of a goal isn't as easy as it looks. And you'd have to get some pace on the ball. I'd say making 1 in 10 might be doable, but that's about as close as you're gonna get.

I honestly can't think of a single sport that would be possible. Pros have spent their entire lives perfecting what they do. It's crazy how good you can get at something. Just imagine if you were playing a heads up NL hold em match against someone who's never played poker before . . . only there are no suckouts.

[pankwindu]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
perhaps table tennis could be done.

[/ QUOTE ]

not even a chance. I would wager everything I own and will ever own on the professional in this match. Hell, if the professional was not goofing around and playing his A game, the noob would not even get a single point.

[/ QUOTE ]

i'd go as far to say that the only times the noob would even actually hit the ball onto the pro's side would be on his own serves.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yep, a pro will have the noob spraying returns everywhere but on the table. There is approximately zero chance of the noob getting a single point.

I think a hardbat game would be better - less spin. Still not sure the noob could get a point, though.

[pankwindu]

How about pool? Could a noob pocket 2 or 3 balls in, say, 3 racks of nine-ball? Could get lucky on a break. Other than that, luck can leave the pro in a bad spot any time, but they would shoot a good safety and still make it tough on the noob. Pro could get an unlucky scratch, virtally ensuring the noob 1 ball.

[FouTight]

In the unmentionable card game a total amature can take out an entire field of players, including many professionals...

It's on ESPN, it's a sport...

[LetYouDown]

Poker is not a sport. I can't even believe that people debate this. ESPN also has the Spelling Bee. Is that a sport? Neither is chess, for that matter.

Regardless, when I initially brought this question up, I was curious which sport the amateur had the LEAST likely chance. Yes, that may be the difference between 1/10000 and 1/10000000. I think it's a much more interesting question when posed that way.

Oddly enough, the one person who said table tennis (hopefully jokingly), gave my answer to the opposite question.

[FouTight]

[ QUOTE ]
Poker is not a sport. I can't even believe that people debate this. ESPN also has the Spelling Bee. Is that a sport? Neither is chess, for that matter.

Regardless, when I initially brought this question up, I was curious which sport the amateur had the LEAST likely chance. Yes, that may be the difference between 1/10000 and 1/10000000. I think it's a much more interesting question when posed that way.

Oddly enough, the one person who said table tennis (hopefully jokingly), gave my answer to the opposite question.

[/ QUOTE ]

FIrstly, I disagree with your defination of sport, but thats neither here nor there.

I also disagree with your assesment of table tennis as the hardest sport for a non player (if I understand the question correctly) to compete against a pro in. I think golf has to be the hardest, because for someone without practice to go hit a ball, well, they will clearly be taking a 12 every hole... I think that with table tennis, they at least have a chance to hit the ball on the other side of the table.

Baseball, also very hard, went to the batting cages hitting what was apparently 75mph toss, and hit probably one ball that would be fair out of 15, and it was a soft grounder to short (which I would not have beaten out)

If you insist on only including athletic events as sports, then thats a bit tough, they are pros for a reason.

[LetYouDown]

Not my definition: Sport (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=sport). To call poker or chess a sport, is absurd. To be a sport, Stephen Hawking cannot play.

[pankwindu]

For absolute least likely chance, I would say golf and boxing are pretty close. There's a (very) small chance of lucking out in the other ones.