I am such a [censored] loser.....

[whiskeytown]

I go to play an open stage tonight, cause I have it off...

I meet a cute girl who is flirting slightly...I take her to a bar afterwards...

I offer to drive her back to my place and cuddle - I bump into a minivan on my way and as near as I can tell, I bump a minivan cause I have a busted taillight...

she's asleep on my futon/bed right now - passed out - we kissed and suggested we would at least cuddle -

but she's asleep on the futon, and I'm being mr. nice guy and getting stoned/staying in the recliner...

luser or not?

RB

[mason55]

loser. just wake her up. [censored] her. jesus.

[Kyle]

SIIHP

you also posted on 2+2 with a chick you brought home at your house. Hmmmm maybe thats something to think about /images/graemlins/wink.gif

[asofel]

[ QUOTE ]
I go to play an open stage tonight, cause I have it off...

I meet a cute girl who is flirting slightly...I take her to a bar afterwards...

I offer to drive her back to my place and cuddle - I bump into a minivan on my way and as near as I can tell, I bump a minivan cause I have a busted taillight...

she's asleep on my futon/bed right now - passed out - we kissed and suggested we would at least cuddle -

but she's asleep on the futon, and I'm being mr. nice guy and getting stoned/staying in the recliner...

luser or not?

RB

[/ QUOTE ]

wait, you "agreed" to cuddle? there's nothing wrong with you just chillin, especially if she's drunk/passed out. are you worried about sleeping in your own bed? i don't think that she'd expect you do to otherwise....hopefully by now you're nice and baked and getting into your own bed...

[whiskeytown]

no, it ain't the same as when she kissed me passionatly out in the parking lot...

for one, I backed into a [censored] MINIVAN!!!!

for second, she thought my apt. building smelled

for three, she thought my apt. smelled

for four, when I said I'd be outside in the recliner, she said, ok, instead of come here...

no, this is the right choice,

honestly, I don't think I'm as lucky as I will be at 140am..

I deserve to get [censored] in the worst way....not the good way, the bad, bad, bad, bad way...I really deserve it...

RB

[tdarko]

[ QUOTE ]
I go to play an open stage tonight, cause I have it off...


[/ QUOTE ]
cool
[ QUOTE ]
I meet a cute girl who is flirting slightly...I take her to a bar afterwards...


[/ QUOTE ]
nice
[ QUOTE ]
I offer to drive her back to my place and cuddle

[/ QUOTE ]
huh? /images/graemlins/confused.gif
[ QUOTE ]
she's asleep on my futon/bed right now - passed out - we kissed and suggested we would at least cuddle -


[/ QUOTE ]
why are you so set on cuddling?
[ QUOTE ]
getting stoned/staying in the recliner...


[/ QUOTE ]
hey at least you're getting something out of this /images/graemlins/smirk.gif

[tdarko]

[ QUOTE ]
for one, I backed into a [censored] MINIVAN!!!!


[/ QUOTE ]
why does this matter?

[shant]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
for one, I backed into a [censored] MINIVAN!!!!


[/ QUOTE ]
why does this matter?

[/ QUOTE ]
Yeah, I didn't get the emphasis on this point.

[asofel]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
for one, I backed into a [censored] MINIVAN!!!!


[/ QUOTE ]
why does this matter?

[/ QUOTE ]
Yeah, I didn't get the emphasis on this point.

[/ QUOTE ]

dude, its a [censored] MINIVAN!!!11

[shant]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
for one, I backed into a [censored] MINIVAN!!!!


[/ QUOTE ]
why does this matter?

[/ QUOTE ]
Yeah, I didn't get the emphasis on this point.

[/ QUOTE ]

dude, its a [censored] MINIVAN!!!11

[/ QUOTE ]
http://webpages.charter.net/samurai-ko_kitty/images/tshirt_designs/OMG.gif

[tonypaladino]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
for one, I backed into a [censored] MINIVAN!!!!


[/ QUOTE ]
why does this matter?

[/ QUOTE ]

[whiskeytown]

I possibly (don't think I did) backed into a vehicle...

if I did and left, that's a crime...if I didn't that suggests I'm not safe to drive...

that was one hour ago - it was not a private parking lot - someone could have conceivably gotten a license plate..[censored]...what her name could blackmail me, and either way, my taillight is broke, translation I need a new left headlight rear plate before I drive....

I was just so goddamn lonely, man..

RB

[Clarkmeister]

[ QUOTE ]
I am such a [censored] loser.....

[/ QUOTE ]

Hard to argue with. Not only your pathetic "let's go cuddle" routine, but the fact that your apartment smells and you can't drive really help seal the deal, something your loser self couldn't come close to doing.

[tdarko]

[ QUOTE ]
I possibly (don't think I did) backed into a vehicle...

if I did and left, that's a crime...if I didn't that suggests I'm not safe to drive...

that was one hour ago - it was not a private parking lot - someone could have conceivably gotten a license plate..[censored]...what her name could blackmail me, and either way, my taillight is broke, translation I need a new left headlight rear plate before I drive....

I was just so goddamn lonely, man..



[/ QUOTE ]
haha your so baked man. keep talking whiskey, your paranoia is very entertaining. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[mason55]

dude, you are wasted.

go FUCK THAT GIRL!!!!!!!

seriously. stop feeling sorry for yourself. she is at your apartment. and you are posting on 2p2. Just go try. what's the worst that happens? She says no!! OMG LOLZ LOLLERSKATES!!!!!!!!!

Seriously. just go for it. nothing to lose everything to gain.

[Dynasty]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I am such a [censored] loser.....

[/ QUOTE ]

Hard to argue with. Not only your pathetic "let's go cuddle" routine...

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, I think a penalty is called for.

I've taken care of it.

[mason55]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I am such a [censored] loser.....

[/ QUOTE ]

Hard to argue with. Not only your pathetic "let's go cuddle" routine...

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, I think a penalty is called for.

I've taken care of it.

[/ QUOTE ]

brilliant

[this guy]

Dude just hit it while she's sleeping.

[tdarko]

sensitive whiskey will most certainly regret this post in the morning.

[newfant]

Post again when you've achieved penetration and we'll guide you through it.

[whiskeytown]

no. I've made the right choice...

RB

[mason55]

take pics at least?

[tdarko]

[ QUOTE ]
no. I've made the right choice...


[/ QUOTE ]
posting or cuddling?

[whiskeytown]

nope....

some outmoded stupid sort of christian morality which I've forgotten keeps my ass planted in the recliner....getting stoned, getting [censored], and not caring...

but it's better then being one of THOSE assholes...

RB

[whiskeytown]

I see that...

and yes, boo hoo, and yet, at the same time, to hell with it....

[censored] beats reality TV and hookers......

RB

[tonypaladino]

[ QUOTE ]
Dude just hit it while she's sleeping.

[/ QUOTE ]

sick

just sick

[asofel]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Dude just hit it while she's sleeping.

[/ QUOTE ]

sick

just sick

[/ QUOTE ]

he's serious too. trust me...i know from experience...

[LethalRose]

[ QUOTE ]
Dude just hit it while she's sleeping.

[/ QUOTE ]

dude didnt you see that movie kids?

[mason55]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Dude just hit it while she's sleeping.

[/ QUOTE ]

dude didnt you see that movie kids?

[/ QUOTE ]

caaaaasper the friendly ghost

[tdarko]

[ QUOTE ]
caaaaasper the friendly ghost

[/ QUOTE ]
the dopest ghost around...

[whiskeytown]

I'm serious too...

anyone that would do what he suggested in my spot, I'd cut their [censored] throat...plain and simple...

I am serious if I knew they did it.

RB

[The Yugoslavian]

Dude, what about just goin' back and hangin' out? Obviously you are in need of some human interaction and you're not gonna get it on OOT. You don't need to SIIHP or bang her or anything really.....just chill, if that passionate kiss comes back, then it's on like Donkey Kong (or whatever, that doesn't need to be the point).

If not, then at least OOT has less material on you for the future, /images/graemlins/wink.gif.

Wake up!! You got a cool chick in your room! Be a gentleman and give her some [censored] company.

Yugoslav

[mason55]

Seriously... If nothing else... Get the eff off of OOT and go cuddle with her. Then come back tomorrow and tell us you SIIHP. Just go get some real human interaction.

[whiskeytown]

nah...she passed about 90 min. ago - we won't hear from her till tomorrow, and she won't wanna be woken up by nothing till 2pm tomorrow, (her alarm rule, not mine...)

nah...she MIGHT respect me for being the gentleman, but either way, [censored] it...it's what I want to do for myself..

RB

[NLSoldier]

[ QUOTE ]
nah...she passed about 90 min. ago - we won't hear from her till tomorrow, and she won't wanna be woken up by nothing till 2pm tomorrow, (her alarm rule, not mine...)

nah...she MIGHT respect me for being the gentleman, but either way, [censored] it...it's what I want to do for myself..

RB

[/ QUOTE ]

you already beat off right after she passed out, didnt you.

[roxtar]

[ QUOTE ]
nope....

some outmoded stupid sort of christian morality which I've forgotten keeps my ass planted in the recliner....getting stoned, getting [censored], and not caring...

but it's better then being one of THOSE assholes...


[/ QUOTE ]

Sooooo right on so many levels. Beating a charge for leaving the scene of an accident is much easier than beating a rape charge. Aside from it being the "right" thing to do it's also the smart thing to do. /images/graemlins/smirk.gif

[Eurotrash]

your play on this fine night:



http://img59.exs.cx/img59/1992/brilliant7lb.jpg

This whole thread is fairly entertaining, but I don't really understand what you are talking about whiskey, anyone care to give me the rundown?

Where's the connection between the van and the girl?

[Reef]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
nah...she passed about 90 min. ago - we won't hear from her till tomorrow, and she won't wanna be woken up by nothing till 2pm tomorrow, (her alarm rule, not mine...)

nah...she MIGHT respect me for being the gentleman, but either way, [censored] it...it's what I want to do for myself..

RB

[/ QUOTE ]

you already beat off right after she passed out, didnt you.

[/ QUOTE ]

I thought that was a given

[KDawgCometh]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I am such a [censored] loser.....

[/ QUOTE ]

Hard to argue with. Not only your pathetic "let's go cuddle" routine...

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, I think a penalty is called for.

I've taken care of it.

[/ QUOTE ]

brilliant

[/ QUOTE ]

[KDawgCometh]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
nah...she passed about 90 min. ago - we won't hear from her till tomorrow, and she won't wanna be woken up by nothing till 2pm tomorrow, (her alarm rule, not mine...)

nah...she MIGHT respect me for being the gentleman, but either way, [censored] it...it's what I want to do for myself..

RB

[/ QUOTE ]

you already beat off on her right after she passed out, didnt you.

[/ QUOTE ]

fyp, he's at least gotta do something to her right

[Dynasty]

[ QUOTE ]

some outmoded stupid sort of christian morality which I've forgotten keeps my ass planted in the recliner....getting stoned, getting [censored], and not caring...

but it's better then being one of THOSE assholes...


[/ QUOTE ]

Actually, I agree. You certainly shouldn't be taking advantage of her while she's passed out. That's nothing less than rape.

But, posting about it earned you the title for 24 hours. After that, it's your call.

[ptmusic]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
nah...she passed about 90 min. ago - we won't hear from her till tomorrow, and she won't wanna be woken up by nothing till 2pm tomorrow, (her alarm rule, not mine...)

nah...she MIGHT respect me for being the gentleman, but either way, [censored] it...it's what I want to do for myself..

RB

[/ QUOTE ]

you already beat off right after she passed out, didnt you.

[/ QUOTE ]

If he's too drunk now, he'll be leaving a load in the sink as soon as she's gone in the morning.

-ptmusic

[Aytumious]

[ QUOTE ]

If he's too drunk now, he'll be leaving a load in the sink as soon as she's gone in the morning.

-ptmusic

[/ QUOTE ]

You beat off into the sink???

[Apathy]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

If he's too drunk now, he'll be leaving a load in the sink as soon as she's gone in the morning.

-ptmusic

[/ QUOTE ]

You beat off into the sink???

[/ QUOTE ]

YA WTF?!? Dynasty this guy needs a new title as well.

[sexdrugsmoney]

luser

[SammyKid11]

[ QUOTE ]
Post again when you've achieved penetration and we'll guide you through it.

[/ QUOTE ]

This easily-overlooked post is the most brilliant thing in this thread.

[ghostface]

looser, make her

[axioma]

[ QUOTE ]
Post again when you've achieved penetration and we'll guide you through it.

[/ QUOTE ]

BIMO

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Post again when you've achieved penetration and we'll guide you through it.

[/ QUOTE ]

BIMO

[/ QUOTE ]

You guys!


Seriously Whiskey I would have cuddled with you. I think. Did you brush your teeth? Your clothes didn't smell funny did they? Okay here's a tip because I feel sorry for you. Women love a guy in a freshly laundered shirt. A freshly laundered very thin cotton shirt. Now if you were wearing that how could she possibly turn you down?



(for what it's worth I like your stupid Christian morality)

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
no, it ain't the same as when she kissed me passionatly out in the parking lot...

for one, I backed into a [censored] MINIVAN!!!!

for second, she thought my apt. building smelled

for three, she thought my apt. smelled

for four, when I said I'd be outside in the recliner, she said, ok, instead of come here...

no, this is the right choice,

honestly, I don't think I'm as lucky as I will be at 140am..

I deserve to get [censored] in the worst way....not the good way, the bad, bad, bad, bad way...I really deserve it...

RB

[/ QUOTE ]

this was your mistake. when you said this she probably thought you didn't want her.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Dude just hit it while she's sleeping.

[/ QUOTE ]

sick

just sick

[/ QUOTE ]

he's serious too. trust me...i know from experience...

[/ QUOTE ]

you fell asleep around him?

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
Dude just hit it while she's sleeping.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not funny. Waker her up, whiskey.

[Slow Play Ray]

damn this is a funny thread.

[lu_hawk]

if you let her sleep then you can nail her next time you hang out. if you wake her up and act creepy she will not want to see you again. let her be.

[dcasper70]

you got any ether?

[jakethebake]

The op was six hours ago. What does whiskey do when he wakes up and finds the body he left in the refrigerator?

[RunDownHouse]

This is definitely one of the best threads we've had in a while. 5 stars.

[Shajen]

Dude,

Don't be that guy with the smelly place.

Clean that [censored].

Also, you rejected her when you said you'd sleep on the recliner. Come on man, she went to your place "to cuddle".

(is that what the kids are calling [censored] these days?)

WOWOWOWOWOWOWOW

[BottlesOf]

Well that's a rational measured response.

[MelchyBeau]

http://www.homemadesimple.com/febreze/image/products/bottle_org.jpg

Melch

[siccjay]

[ QUOTE ]
if you let her sleep then you can nail her next time you hang out. if you wake her up and act creepy she will not want to see you again. let her be.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd be willing to bet my life he never even kisses this chick again.

[touchfaith]

So you were too drunk to even notice if you hit another car or not, but yet you still put another person into your car and drove drunk.

Lame.

[mslif]

definitely not a looser. You made the right choice.

[Clarkmeister]

Get defensive all you want, your original loser self-analysis is correct. From starting off with the "let's cuddle" bit all the way through to you abandoning her to go into another room of your smelly home, you clearly never gave yourself a chance to succeed.

All cognitive dissonance aside, you clearly wanted to hit it and butchered this situation as badly as you could've. Getting defensive about those who suggest you hit it while she's sleeping is silly as those suggestions are obviously a joke.

Don't lose sight of the fact that you simply need a better gameplan (and a cleaner house) next time. Chicks don't dig guys who expect to fail. At least fake being confident and a big part of that is not setting yourself up to have a wounded ego by banging into other cars or having subpar cleanliness/hygene. Because if you are really so lacking in confidence that your starting point is "cuddling" of all things, you certainly can't afford any ego damage at all if you are to have any hope of sealing the deal.

[/Dr. OOT]

[turnipmonster]

BOOOM!

[SomethingClever]

Clark is correct here, whiskey.

Here's what you do. Run to the store and buy some cleaning supplies. Clean the [censored] out of your apartment while she sleeps. Jet into the bedroom and throw yourself onto the bed next to her. Fall asleep.

Wake up, pretend like you don't remember what happened.

[ChipWrecked]

[ QUOTE ]
Chicks don't dig guys who expect to fail. At least fake being confident

[/ QUOTE ]

Yup. 'Fake it til you make it' applies in lots of situations, because it works.

[Dominic]

what's with this cuddle crap?? Cuddling is for people who are in a relationship. And any girl who has ever gotten into my bed knows that we are having sex. Or she shouldn't get into ny bed.

Come on, Dude. You're one of my favorite people on OOT - stop being a pussy and start being the guy who's a little bit of an [censored] but all the girls wanna bang. I know you have it in you.

[B Dids]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Dude just hit it while she's sleeping.

[/ QUOTE ]

dude didnt you see that movie kids?

[/ QUOTE ]

No, but I've seen the porno with SonDoobiest.

[SL__72]

Man, you're gonna get hauled off to jail.

[ptmusic]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

If he's too drunk now, he'll be leaving a load in the sink as soon as she's gone in the morning.

-ptmusic

[/ QUOTE ]

You beat off into the sink???

[/ QUOTE ]

YA WTF?!? Dynasty this guy needs a new title as well.

[/ QUOTE ]

About a decade ago, I saw a surprise performance of Andrew Dice Clay in the smallest room at the Comedy Store in L.A. He was working on new material for his upcoming arena tour (this was the peak of his career).

There were only about 20 of us in the audience. He walked over to a table and started picking on a double dating foursome.

"Which couple has been f'ng for a while?" (a couple raises hands).

(He looks at the other couple) "Ok, so you're on a blind date or something?" (the other couple nods).

"Here's what's going on... Each guy wants to f the other girl. You two already f'ing are going to f tonight after my show.

But you (looks at the blind date guy) are going to get a little peck on the lips, say goodnight, go home with a boner thinking about your friend's girlfriend, and leave a load in the sink."

-ptmusic

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
About a decade ago... Andrew Dice Clay...(this was the peak of his career).

[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/confused.gif

[BeerMoney]

Why do you have to let the whole world know every time you hook up? I knew what this post was going to be before I opened it.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]

Why do you have to let the whole world know every time you don't hook up? I knew what this post was going to be before I opened it.

[/ QUOTE ]

[whiskeytown]

the girl is gone - she's in her car driving home - nothing happened

I have to try to get 5 hrs sleep before going to work, and all I can think about is being a [censored] dumbass and clipping a car and running off cause I was scared I was over the legal limit.-

I deserve to go down hard for this one, guys, - God I hope my guardian angels have one more miracle for me.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
nothing happened....I have to try to get 5 hrs sleep before going to work

[/ QUOTE ]

What the hell have you been doing all this time? /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[Shajen]

[ QUOTE ]
the girl is gone - she's in her car driving home - nothing happened

I have to try to get 5 hrs sleep before going to work, and all I can think about is being a [censored] dumbass and clipping a car and running off cause I was scared I was over the legal limit.-

I deserve to go down hard for this one, guys, - God I hope my guardian angels have one more miracle for me.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wait a minute...you bumped into the minivan while driving down the road? Not in the parking lot?

Are you [censored] retarded? (Harsh, but true. Don't drink and drive man) Dude, that [censored] ain't cool. No wonder she didn't want to have anything to do with you, she probably [censored] her pants on the drive home and was embarrassed.

[whiskeytown]

no, I bumped it in a parking lot -

I know it's [censored] stupid - and I've been lucky, and I hope I'm just lucky once more -

swear to God, if I get thru this with no bad consequences I'll even change my online name to reflect something different. -

RB

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y2/B00T/508fe351.jpg


##### YOU BLEW IT#####

[jackdaniels]

[ QUOTE ]
http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y2/B00T/508fe351.jpg


##### YOU BLEW IT#####

[/ QUOTE ]

This could be a good one. Keep it up.

[PITTM]

i could get used to this gimmick account...

rj

[KramerTM]

[ QUOTE ]
SIIHP

you also posted on 2+2 with a chick you brought home at your house. Hmmmm maybe thats something to think about /images/graemlins/wink.gif


[/ QUOTE ]

LOL

[TStoneMBD]

http://img18.imageshack.us/img18/3275/nh3od.jpg

nh