Leaving for school...slight dilemma

[drexah]

Goin to prep. school to do a PG year and am leaving tomorrow...started a relationship at the beginning of the summer (around 5 mo.) and really like this girl.

Although its not like im going to college, and will be back on a lot on weekends , it will be by far the longest time spent apart so far in our relationship (we hung out basically every day this summer.) So, she is still in school (younger than me), and has class until 2.

This is where it gets complicated...I was planning on taking her out to Boston as a surprise, although I had told her i really wanted to hang out with her the night before i left. She works, and was scheduled to work tommorrow night 6-9, so she took it off a couple days ago, and then tells me today her friend asked her to fill in for her and "forgot" it was my last night and said sure. I am like WTF you 'forgot' and she just says yes like it is absolutely nothing. So...she said she would come over after school.

what is my move...Just bang her and send her home for 'forgetting' it was my last night, or be forgiving and go see her at work/say bye to her when she gets off of work?


better kipin?

[kipin]

Return.. button.. broken?

[smokingrobot]

[ QUOTE ]
what is my move...Just bang her and send her home for 'forgetting' it was my last night

[/ QUOTE ]

i thought you said you really liked her?

so do you?

[drexah]

i threw that in there to satisfy the stereotypical OOT'er, otherwise i thought i'd probably just get flamed. I would never do that, and yes i do really like her.

[jokerthief]

Prep School? How old are you?

[drexah]

turned 18 in June. I did [censored] in high school...barely graduated...probably should of been on adderall i would of got straight A's. Anyway, it's better than going to community college, i have the money, and i am playing soccer and lacrosse, and might play in college.

[smokingrobot]

long distance sucks.

my first gf went to ohio for college and i was stuck back home in hs, we ended up breaking up not too long after.

2nd gf, i went to college, she was in hs, although a year later she went to college 30 minutes from mine.

3rd gf moved to dc, now shes back in philly.

so i have tons of long distance experience and believe me, it sucks.

you're going to spend a [censored] load of time on the phone im sure.

tell you wanna stick it out if you like her. you will need time to yourself though to make friends, adjust to new surroundings etc. you may even find yourself wishing you didnt.

its a tough decision, and i dont know if the answer will be made clear in this discussion.

im a big proponent of making my own mistakes to learn from, but you really should do some soul searching.

but long distance can work out too, you said you'd see her on the weekends.

have you asked her how she felt about it? maybe she's wondering the same thing you are.

[smokingrobot]

i was on adderall. it helped except it turns you into a zombie/robot.

[coffeecrazy1]

Word to the wise: Do not slow down for this girl. If it was not a big enough deal for her to make sure she had work off, then you know where you stand. People's actions count astoundingly more than their words.

[drexah]

[ QUOTE ]
Word to the wise: Do not slow down for this girl. If it was not a big enough deal for her to make sure she had work off, then you know where you stand. People's actions count astoundingly more than their words.

[/ QUOTE ]

Very true, however, this girl is VERY bad at communicating her feelings/talking in general. Today when she told me i got in sort of a weird mood and she asked me shortly after what was wrong, to which i explained that if it was her last day i would never "forget" and work the night before..and she basically had no idea what to say because in all honesty i believe she did forget, she just doesn't think/worry about [censored] at all and is extremely easy going, we talked already about how im leaving and her whole thing was just like "we will see what happens but i really like you and am going to give it my best effort to make things work" heh...really assuring comments..

[drexah]

one of the main reasons i want to stay with her, not just because i like her a lot and feel like just ending things would be a complete waste of the past 5 months, but my school is only an hour away, i have class mon-sat, sat. being a 'half day' so it is my impression (it is very strict there, no parties, etc.) i will be coming home almost every weekend. Also, i get a shitload of breaks, and the major ones (thanksgiving, xmas, march) are like 3-4 weeks, and i also have a ridiculous amount of 'long weekends' where i'll be home...so i will be home alot and just want to chill with her.

[smokingrobot]

you seem like you're trying to convince yourself.

if you want to, do it.

or let me say this another way, you seem like you really want to stick it out, then do it. whats the worst that could happen?

[smokingrobot]

yah the whole forgetting thing is kinda wack.

All I really want is to love you, babe
Make your body feel like heaven, babe
I just wanna satisfy ya, babe
That's all I want, that's all I want
I just wanna give ya somethin', babe
Just wanna keep it comin', babe
I just wanna make you happy, babe
That's all I want, that's all I want.

[drexah]

heh, is it just me or can i use this as a perfect way to make her feel bad and SIIHP? comes to mind because today when hanging out with her i was talking about doin her from behind but it came out more along the lines of 'i want to siiyp' and she didnt really say anything for a few seconds before i was like 'oh i didnt mean that' and she she was just like 'oh ok.'

[drexah]

[ QUOTE ]
All I really want is to love you, babe
Make your body feel like heaven, babe
I just wanna satisfy ya, babe
That's all I want, that's all I want
I just wanna give ya somethin', babe
Just wanna keep it comin', babe
I just wanna make you happy, babe
That's all I want, that's all I want.

[/ QUOTE ]


are you trapped in the closet? you might want to pm bigsteve.

[smokingrobot]

this has some awesome potential here. nh, to whoever this is.

[drexah]

[ QUOTE ]
you seem like you're trying to convince yourself.

if you want to, do it.

or let me say this another way, you seem like you really want to stick it out, then do it. whats the worst that could happen?

[/ QUOTE ]

i've been told before that i am trying to "force" it to work...i guess it's because ive always really wanted a gf and now i have it, but she is very inexperienced (i'm her first real bf/devirg'd her) and im just trying change her to how i want her.

Yea i want to stick it out, especially since im going to be working my ass off at school and come home on weekends and just wanna chill with her...i guess nothing 'too' bad could happen, although i'd probably tweak if she called me and said she like F'd another dude. Not sure if that or if she said she just wants to be with someone is worse. No use worrying though, i'm just glad im playing sports to distract me.

[drexah]

100$ says it's kipin...

[smokingrobot]

i hate planning things and im a disorganized person, so thoughts about my schedule the day after today are pretty much nonexistent. that said, if it were me, i'd just ride it out. see where it goes.

you'll be home enough to spend time with her if you're serious, and if that declines, you're away enough to not have it be a burden on your daily life.

[kipin]

[ QUOTE ]
100$ says it's kipin...

[/ QUOTE ]

You'd be wrong.

[drexah]

Update: gf came through in the clutch... really surprised me...Called me after she got out of school at 2 and said she found someone to work for her, i ended up hanging out with her from then until 10 when she had to go...had a good time, although my 9 year old sister came downstairs when i had just got her naked and i was laying on top of her w/o my shirt on...kinda killed the mood and weirded her out but it ended alright.

[MyTurn2Raise]

you do know that you are most likely screwed because long distance never works

[Wetdog]

[ QUOTE ]
Update: gf came through in the clutch... really surprised me...Called me after she got out of school at 2 and said she found someone to work for her, i ended up hanging out with her from then until 10 when she had to go...had a good time, although my 9 year old sister came downstairs when i had just got her naked and i was laying on top of her w/o my shirt on...kinda killed the mood and weirded her out but it ended alright.

[/ QUOTE ]

Jebus! Is this American Grafitti gone Bernies? I keep waiting for "and then she goes, she goes, like..."

[drexah]

"never"?

damn you're optimistic.

but yes, i know that long distance relationships often do not work out, however, did you even read my other posts in this thread? i am going an hour away, and will be coming home probably on average 2 weekends a month through this school year, not even including the ridiculous amount of 3-4 day long weekends we have, and the 3-4 week breaks in nov/dec/mar. also, my situation won't really allow me to meet a lot of girls, let alone ever having the chance to hook up with them. and i am confident she wants to work things out and we will stay together. but thanks for your comments.

[mason55]

Since you are not going off to college but jusut doing a PG year where you'll be studying all the time, this isin't a bad deal. Maybe you can find a piece on the side for while you're at school? If not, sticking it out is probably the best choice as you obvoiusly care about her.

[drexah]

[ QUOTE ]
Since you are not going off to college but jusut doing a PG year where you'll be studying all the time, this isin't a bad deal. Maybe you can find a piece on the side for while you're at school? If not, sticking it out is probably the best choice as you obvoiusly care about her.

[/ QUOTE ]


exactly what i was thinking. thx mason..one of the few times i've seen an OOT'er actually optimistic and positive about a subject like this, heh /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[DasLeben]

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