The Stupidest Things In Sports - NFL Division

[Bill Murphy]

1. Talking about the importance of a "Left Tackle". The idea here, of course, is that the LT protects the QB's blindside. A *right-handed* QB's blinside. The two players widely considered to be the best offensive tackles in history, Anthony Munoz & Art Shell, both played in front of LEFT-HANDED QB's (Esiason & Stabler). Mind ay all the hubbub over Tony Boselli a few years back? Mark Brunell=Lefty.

I refuse to watch the NFL as it is, in fact, unwatchable(and certainly unlistenable, save for Michaels, Madden, & Jimmy Johnson; Bradshaw=must be shot on sight), and in the immortal words of crybaby-no ring RoyW, I could give a sh1t who wins the WSOF each year, but I always follow the draft for Schadenfrude(sp?) reasons.

Just wis over tae espn.com and they was blathering on aboot mah boy Jordan Gross(fae right here in UT /forums/images/icons/laugh.gif ) and what a great LT he is, but maybe he'll have to play RT in the pros.

JAYSUS CRAHST! I mind ay once some cvnt pointing the Shell/Munoz bit out to Paul "Dr. Z" Zimmerman in his online column. His reply? "Hmm, interesting, you're right; Boomer & The Snake WERE paws." And this guy's in the HOF & is on the selection commitee?!

2. 40 yd dash times, esp. for linemen & QB's

3. Reps on the 225 bench.

The overall stupidest thing in sports, tho, as hinted at above, is believing anything a college basketball coach says.

[Zeno]

A bit off topic but you touched on it. I'll give some handy advice on how to watch sports on TV, My way:

1. Watch all sports programs with the mute on. All the important information is on the screen anyway.

2. Put on some music that goes with the style of sport that you are watching.

3. You can then also doing some reading, on sports, poker, or perhaps Marcus Tullius Cicero or Oscar Wilde, or even a porno mag if that is your taste.

4. Have some beer, chips, and good salsa. (Obvious, I know)

5. Always lie down on the couch so you have an eye on the TV and your reading material, have side tables for extra goodies, cooler for beer (no moving off the couch) etc.

6. Set up the living room for maximum efficiency and strategic layout for the TV, Music Center, couch, extra tables, cooler etc.

7. If you have a wife - Kick her out of the house, tell her to go see her new boyfriend.

8. Never believe anything said by a coach in any sport.


Happy viewing.

-Zeno

[HDPM]

A lot of stupid things go on of course, but one stupid thing is taken for granted and is a fundamental part of the game. And that's the chains. You have a hungover blind ref who doesn't really care see a 230 pound running back charge into a wall of huge linemen in a short yardage situation. There's a big pile. The ref guesses where the ball is and puts hs foot down like he knows. Then the chains are brought in to measure first down to the millimeter. And they never tell us how the chains are calibrated. It's this precise, scientific veneer placed on total eyeball guesswork. Now it is a more charming practice than putting sensors and stuff in the ball or using lasers or whatever and measuring by real scientific instruments. But it is really dumb when you think about it at all.

P.S. I think the psych tests at the combine have to be worse than the bench or 40's for linemen.