Worst line you ever told a girl?

[arod15]

What was it? when? and results of that action?
Mine? I was 14 went up to a girl, pulled down my pants and said suck it. She laughed at me and walked away.....

[Vince Young]

Let me SIIYP.

[MrTrik]

You were either an insane idiot or had one heck of a set of balls on you at 14.

[utmt40]

A good friend of mine in High School walked up to a girl with an actual screw in his hand and said "Wanna screw?" The girl and him both kinda laughed it off.

[JMP300z]

"I love you."

-JP

[BOTW]

I used the "I didn't take it out for air" line from Requiem for a Dream not too long ago. It worked, but it felt really, really stupid instead of funny like I wanted.

Too many times I've used: "Ummm, I schaid I thwink joo arre hot. I wanna suadf sdoem areeelnt pooper. What? I'mm not slurrring. [censored] YOU I AM NOT DRUNK YOU WHOORE! Ya, where is your tough guy boyfriend? I'll kick all yer sorry...hey, hey! [censored] you too Mr. tough bouncer guy!" It hasn't worked yet, but I'll keep trying and let you know.

[Alobar]

This isnt the worst line ive told a girl, but my friends make sooo much fun of me for this one. I was drunk and trying to get with this chick. In the convorsation she said people always tell her she looks like kate hudson (which she did have a big resemblance to).

So anyway, later on that night when I was trying to close the deal. I stared her straight on, gave her my sexiest grin and said "You don't look like Kate Hudson, (pause) Kate Hudson looks like you". Very very gay, and my buddy who was there overheard that and immediately started laughing, but even that didnt kill it for her. She ate it up. Which is why I don't care how lame it sounded or how bad my friends ripped on me for it, cuz I went home with her that night.

She turned out to be a psycho headcase tho, so the moral of the story is dont hit on chicks who kate hudson looks like, heh.

[poker-penguin]

Back when I was fit, I used to regularly be a professional sportsman when I went out.

[JaBlue]

Good one, Alobar!

the only thing u have to know is that women have a vagina and they will do everything in there power to make it seem like she dosent want u to bone her, but she does.

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
You were either an insane idiot or had one heck of a set of balls on you at 14.

[/ QUOTE ]
a comnination of two and idiot with balls.

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
"I love you."

-JP

[/ QUOTE ]
always a bad thing to say

[Lawrence Ng]

Yesterday night I went to pick up this girl called Melanie.

As I get out of my car to greet her, I say,

"Oh hello Teresa"

...... ..... .... /images/graemlins/confused.gif

Pwned by myself.

Lawrence

[The Stranger]

"I hate you! I never want to speak to you again!"

[fifteen minutes later, crying]

"I'm sorry baby."

[diebitter]

[ QUOTE ]
the only thing u have to know is that women have a vagina and they will do everything in there power to make it seem like she dosent want u to bone her, but she does.

[/ QUOTE ]

You've never been married, have you?

[Evan]

Did she charge you more?

[HopeydaFish]

[ QUOTE ]

Too many times I've used: "Ummm, I schaid I thwink joo arre hot. I wanna suadf sdoem areeelnt pooper. What? I'mm not slurrring. [censored] YOU I AM NOT DRUNK YOU WHOORE! Ya, where is your tough guy boyfriend? I'll kick all yer sorry...hey, hey! [censored] you too Mr. tough bouncer guy!" It hasn't worked yet, but I'll keep trying and let you know.

[/ QUOTE ]

Funny, I've used that line too many times myself. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[whiskeytown]

it probably sounded a lot like "well, if you wanna get stoned, I have some stuff back at my place" /images/graemlins/grin.gif - (she was a major pothead, and no, I did not score)

RB

[garyjacosta]

I was dating this girl back in college. We had an on and off relationship the better part of 3 years. She graduated a year before me and moved home to Tampa. She was supposed to come visit me the day before Thanksgiving. Well, I had started to date another girl So I was going to call her to break it off with her before she flew out to see me.

Anyway, she decides to fly in 2 days early to surprise me. As soon as she got to my apartment she starts getting undressed and is ready to go. I decided that I wasn't gay, so what the hell.....

As we are laying in bed naked afterwards, I turn to her and say. " I don't think I'm in love with you anymore." Needless to say she went psycho. Threw things at me, destroyed a good bit of my stuff, and flew back home that afternoon.

So 5 days later, I'm at work when my roommate calls me. I turns out my Ex drove to New Orleans from Tampa and took my dog, CD's and favorite pillow with her.

What a bitch.

[Alobar]

[ QUOTE ]
and took my dog...


[/ QUOTE ]

dude she took your dog? I wouldnt have been calling her a bitch, Ida driven out to tampa and [censored] slapped the [censored] outta that ho....literally. And what kinda roomate lets her do that?

[RunDownHouse]

[ QUOTE ]
And what kinda roomate lets her do that?

[/ QUOTE ]
This is an excellent point. Unless she had a key, in which case you're an idiot for not getting her key before you dumped her, your roommate should be castrated for allowing that. I can't imagine they kind of person who would take a man's dog, but no guy I know, much less friend/roommate, would allow it to happen.

[garyjacosta]

The roomate was a girl who used to be best friends with the Ex. She didn't really know what to do. Besides, the Ex brought some guy with her so it's not like she could physically restrain her. She called me and I came home too late.

[SammyKid11]

[ QUOTE ]
And what kinda roomate lets her do that?

[/ QUOTE ]

The kind that BONED her before she left with his dog.

[SammyKid11]

Damn. Got that reply in too late.

[Alobar]

[ QUOTE ]
The roomate was a girl who used to be best friends with the Ex. She didn't really know what to do. Besides, the Ex brought some guy with her so it's not like she could physically restrain her. She called me and I came home too late.

[/ QUOTE ]

but you still drove to tampa and slapped the [censored] [censored] outta her right? What kinda guy bangs some broad then right after tells her he isnt in love with her but then isnt man enough to get his dog back??? Hell I'd go to war for my dog on the same level of magnitute as if someone kidnapped my GF or raped my mother or something.

[RunDownHouse]

So what happened? Did you just chalk the dog up as a loss? Did you roadtrip to retrieve it, not unlike Big Bird in "Follow that Bird?"

I'm curious as hell.

[Alobar]

[ QUOTE ]


I'm curious as hell.

[/ QUOTE ]

no kidding. If I dont get some resolution out of this im gunna be upset. I've actually been delaying my run just cuz I wanna find out the answer.

Yes, I am lame.

[brendons31]

I've always found the "i'm a pro poker player" line doesn't work too well. When I say it i can see them thinking "this guy has a gambling problem". Its a line which has had very limited success.

[Alobar]

[ QUOTE ]
I've always found the "i'm a pro poker player" line doesn't work too well. When I say it i can see them thinking "this guy has a gambling problem". Its a line which has had very limited success.

[/ QUOTE ]

which is why you should make stuff up. Ive been everything from an underwater welder, to the regional distrabution manager for Bobs Big Boy

[RunDownHouse]

Ever gone with architect, or marine biologist?

[Alobar]

[ QUOTE ]
Ever gone with architect, or marine biologist?

[/ QUOTE ]

Naw, I'm not as cool as george.

[Lawrence Ng]

[ QUOTE ]
Did she charge you more?

[/ QUOTE ]

No your mom didn't.

Lawrence

[arod15]

another regretable one occured at 16. I was making out with a girl and after a few subtle attempts to take of her pants i went another route. I took mine off and said "i took mine off now you take off yours" reponse.... Laughter and she said "that wouldnt work on anyone" No score dang it....

[DcifrThs]

wow, you look very eastern european. do you have any hungarian in you?

oh, well would you like some?

-Barron

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
wow, you look very eastern european. do you have any hungarian in you?

oh, well would you like some?
unoriginal but i've heard it before


-Barron

[/ QUOTE ]

[garyjacosta]

[ QUOTE ]
So what happened? Did you just chalk the dog up as a loss? Did you roadtrip to retrieve it, not unlike Big Bird in "Follow that Bird?"

I'm curious as hell.

[/ QUOTE ]

I let her keep the dog. It was my last semester of college and I didn't know where I was going to be afterwards, so I figured letting her have it would at least be +EV for the dog.

I've only talked to the Ex once since this happened. She showed up drunk at my door during Mardi Gras at 8 AM that next year. It was a short and awkward conversation. Haven't seen her or the dog since.

[DcifrThs]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
wow, you look very eastern european. do you have any hungarian in you?

oh, well would you like some?
unoriginal but i've heard it before


-Barron

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

i never said i created the line. just adopted it to my ethnicity.

and in response to my post, you quoted it and added your opinion in the text of the original quote saying: unoriginal but you've heard it before.

uh, what? usually when you say, X followed by but, the rest contradicts the X.

-Barron

[Tyler Durden]

Last night I finally hooked up w/ a girl that I've been friends w/ for a few months...lying in bed she said "i never knew you liked me" and i drunkingly said "you're pretty and you're fun....pretty fun"

i thought it was hilarious.

[Tyler Durden]

Suck me beautiful

[nothumb]

When I was very young (definitely under 13, not sure how young exactly) I told a relatively nice looking girl in her late teens that I wanted to 'hit it from the back.'

I had recently been introduced to the term and didn't know much about it's connotation, usage, etc, just that it sounded cool.

She was not impressed.

NT

[x2ski]

[ QUOTE ]
Last night I finally hooked up w/ a girl that I've been friends w/ for a few months...lying in bed she said "i never knew you liked me" and i drunkingly said "you're pretty and you're fun....pretty fun"

i thought it was hilarious.

[/ QUOTE ]

Fantastic /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[cdxx]

"your hair smells so good." she still won't let me live that one down.

[diebitter]

[ QUOTE ]

As we are laying in bed naked afterwards, I turn to her and say. " I don't think I'm in love with you anymore." Needless to say she went psycho.

[/ QUOTE ]

Shoulda said it whilst doing her doggy style, and held on tight. It's as good as a rodeo!

[morgan180]

[ QUOTE ]
Last night I finally hooked up w/ a girl that I've been friends w/ for a few months...lying in bed she said "i never knew you liked me" and i drunkingly said "you're pretty and you're fun....pretty fun"

i thought it was hilarious.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is funny.

[2005]

[ QUOTE ]
I've always found the "i'm a pro poker player" line doesn't work too well.

[/ QUOTE ]

Works pretty well on strippers...

Seriously though, it's worked pretty well for me regardless, I guess it's the danger/rebel to society factor working

[bustedchucks]

i was in a bar and seen this girl standing in the corner drinking her beer very quickly and looking sorta uncomfortable. not great looking, but good enough for me so i got two beers and went over and offered her one. she thanked me and we talked for a bit and then i said
"are you getting tired?"
"no," she replied, "why do you ask"
"oh, no reason, hey (pointing to her beer) drink up!"

note to self: implied roofies jokes dont get you laid

[bugstud]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I've always found the "i'm a pro poker player" line doesn't work too well.

[/ QUOTE ]

Works pretty well on strippers...

Seriously though, it's worked pretty well for me regardless, I guess it's the danger/rebel to society factor working

[/ QUOTE ]

I do not have similar success. I also am not as charming or affluent, so YMMV

[gulebjorn]

[ QUOTE ]
What was it? when? and results of that action?

[/ QUOTE ]

"Wanna go upstairs?" as the only thing I had said all night to the girl in question.

Results: we went upstairs. She was ugly. I was drunk.

Edit: I forgot the when-part. About five years ago. In college, obviously.

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
Last night I finally hooked up w/ a girl that I've been friends w/ for a few months...lying in bed she said "i never knew you liked me" and i drunkingly said "you're pretty and you're fun....pretty fun"

i thought it was hilarious.

[/ QUOTE ] ahahah nice one

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
i was in a bar and seen this girl standing in the corner drinking her beer very quickly and looking sorta uncomfortable. not great looking, but good enough for me so i got two beers and went over and offered her one. she thanked me and we talked for a bit and then i said
"are you getting tired?"
"no," she replied, "why do you ask"
"oh, no reason, hey (pointing to her beer) drink up!"

note to self: implied roofies jokes dont get you laid

[/ QUOTE ]
wow we have a criminal within us two plus twoers
ha like it

[arod15]

This one i think is good. A real attractive girl dancing on a bar (i was 20 in college) came up to be grabbed my face and said "wanna buy me a drink cutie?" i replied "your not that cute!" Please never buy a girl a drink who asks for it you have about a 1% chance of scoring. Now if you have been dancing with her made out with her and then she askes do it and make it a double (whisper in the bartenders ear)

[cadillac1234]

'I sure wish I was a squirrel'
'Why?'
'Because I'd love to bust a nut in your hole'

Results Below
<font color="white">-86'd from Club Terminator in 1991 </font>

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
A good friend of mine in High School walked up to a girl with an actual screw in his hand and said "Wanna screw?" The girl and him both kinda laughed it off.

[/ QUOTE ]

i did this a few times when i was like 14.

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
'I sure wish I was a squirrel'
'Why?'
'Because I'd love to bust a nut in your hole'

Results Below
<font color="white">-86'd from Club Terminator in 1991 </font>

[/ QUOTE ]
That is real funny too bad it ididnt work

[Mayhap]

"I wish I was a pair of your socks."
"Why?"
"So I could ramble through your drawers."
*slap*

[Huhmare]

"do you go here often?"

[touchfaith]

Hi

[oneeye13]

[ QUOTE ]
Now if you have been dancing with her made out with her and then she askes do it and make it a double (whisper in the bartenders ear)

[/ QUOTE ]

creepy

[mblax10]

Suck me beautiful

[morgan180]

[ QUOTE ]
Suck me beautiful

[/ QUOTE ]

i laughed.

[ddubois]

[ QUOTE ]
i was in a bar and seen this girl standing in the corner drinking her beer very quickly and looking sorta uncomfortable. not great looking, but good enough for me so i got two beers and went over and offered her one. she thanked me and we talked for a bit and then i said
"are you getting tired?"
"no," she replied, "why do you ask"
"oh, no reason, hey (pointing to her beer) drink up!"

note to self: implied roofies jokes dont get you laid

[/ QUOTE ]
I vote this the winner.

[Goodnews]

[ QUOTE ]
Ever gone with architect, or marine biologist?

[/ QUOTE ]

and call yourself art vandalay?

[tonypaladino]

Not mine, but a coworker:

[ QUOTE ]
My mom is out of town, so maybe if you come over, I'll let you suck my dick.

[/ QUOTE ]

[Mangatang]

[ QUOTE ]
So what happened? Did you just chalk the dog up as a loss? Did you roadtrip to retrieve it, not unlike Big Bird in "Follow that Bird?"


[/ QUOTE ]

Holy [censored]! I thought I was the only one to ever reference this movie before. /images/graemlins/grin.gif You must have children too, huh?

After seeing this movie dozens of times (actually hearing it in the background dozens of times), I actually like the songs in it. It's quite hypnotizing.

[Wes ManTooth]

I heard someone say this last night...

"I am no Fred Flintstone but I will make your bedrock"

[morgan180]

are you a karate instructor? cause girl, you're looks are kickin.

[arod15]

How drunk were you....

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
Not mine, but a coworker:

[ QUOTE ]
My mom is out of town, so maybe if you come over, I'll let you suck my dick.

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]
what lady could turn that down?.....

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
I heard someone say this last night...

"I am no Fred Flintstone but I will make your bedrock"

[/ QUOTE ]
Results? probably a laugh perhaps a slap but certainly no ass...

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
are you a karate instructor? cause girl, you're looks are kickin.

[/ QUOTE ]
sigh....

[Cancer Merchant]

[ QUOTE ]
I heard someone say this last night...

"I am no Fred Flintstone but I will make your bedrock"

[/ QUOTE ]

Baby, you can call me milk 'cause I'll do your body good.

[cdxx]

[ QUOTE ]
Let me SIIYP.

[/ QUOTE ]

i love firefox, because it lets me block annoying and/or sick avatars like yours.

[arod15]

I forget but i know thats from a movie

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Let me SIIYP.

[/ QUOTE ]

i love firefox, because it lets me block annoying and/or sick avatars like yours.

[/ QUOTE ]
Maulik do you even talk to girls.......

[Cancer Merchant]

[ QUOTE ]
I forget but i know thats from a movie

[/ QUOTE ]

Damn, thought it was original.

On the upside, I did get a good laugh from the poor gal that I inflicted it on.

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I forget but i know thats from a movie

[/ QUOTE ]

Damn, thought it was original.
Nope its been around for quite some time. I just cant pin point it.
On the upside, I did get a good laugh from the poor gal that I inflicted it on.

[/ QUOTE ]

[judgesmails]

I was in college at a party and very drunk. Approached the hottest girl in the house who was standing with a group of her friends.

Me, "Want to go back to my place, eat spaghetti and f@#k?" (f@#k?)

Her (with stunned look on her face) "Uh.... no."

Me, "Why, don't you like spaghetti?"

I was then asked to leave.

[hyde]

[ QUOTE ]
I was in college at a party and very drunk. Approached the hottest girl in the house who was standing with a group of her friends.

Me, "Want to go back to my place, eat spaghetti and f@#k?"

Her (with stunned look on her face) "Uh.... no."

Me, "Why, don't you like spaghetti?"

I was then asked to leave.

[/ QUOTE ]

Asked to leave??? that was fvcking adorable....
too risque for a college party? very lame party.

[Vavavoom]

Worst line I heard used....:

Guy (To A Random Girl) : "You must be a parking ticket....Cos, U've got FINE written all over you" !

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I was in college at a party and very drunk. Approached the hottest girl in the house who was standing with a group of her friends.

Me, "Want to go back to my place, eat spaghetti and f@#k?"

Her (with stunned look on her face) "Uh.... no."

Me, "Why, don't you like spaghetti?"

I was then asked to leave.

[/ QUOTE ]

Asked to leave??? that was fvcking adorable....
too risque for a college party? very lame party.

[/ QUOTE ]
while in college i was taking a girl home i actualyl got a score. But she then perceeded to say "you have to feed me spagetti first" so i cooked then hit it. Must have been that guy;s logic.....

[Escape]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I was in college at a party and very drunk. Approached the hottest girl in the house who was standing with a group of her friends.

Me, "Want to go back to my place, eat spaghetti and f@#k?"

Her (with stunned look on her face) "Uh.... no."

Me, "Why, don't you like spaghetti?"

I was then asked to leave.

[/ QUOTE ]

Asked to leave??? that was fvcking adorable....
too risque for a college party? very lame party.

[/ QUOTE ]
while in college i was taking a girl home i actualyl got a score. But she then perceeded to say "you have to feed me spagetti first" so i cooked then hit it. Must have been that guy;s logic.....

[/ QUOTE ]

How chubby was she?

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
Worst line I heard used....:

Guy (To A Random Girl) : "You must be a parking ticket....Cos, U've got FINE written all over you" !

[/ QUOTE ]
ha that wont even work in the UK sad world we live in.

[hotdog da 2rd]

once i was chatting it up w/ this cutie at a party and threw out the "you are definitly the prettiest girl in the room" line, out of nowhere a friend of hers came up to us and i suddenly realized i used that same line on the friend a couple hrs ago. all i remembered was them whispering and giggling and me wanting to dive under a rock. /images/graemlins/blush.gif

How'd you like to earn $14 the hard way?

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
How'd you like to earn $14 the hard way?

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh!

[rory]

Hey there your mom is sick and asked me to pick you up at school. That's a nice dress.

[mslif]

[ QUOTE ]
Hey there your mom is sick and asked me to pick you up at school. That's a nice dress.

[/ QUOTE ]

So wrong....

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Hey there your mom is sick and asked me to pick you up at school. That's a nice dress.

[/ QUOTE ]

So wrong....

[/ QUOTE ]

Very, very wrong. /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[Voltron87]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

As we are laying in bed naked afterwards, I turn to her and say. " I don't think I'm in love with you anymore." Needless to say she went psycho.

[/ QUOTE ]

Shoulda said it whilst doing her doggy style, and held on tight. It's as good as a rodeo!

[/ QUOTE ]


this is hilarious

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

As we are laying in bed naked afterwards, I turn to her and say. " I don't think I'm in love with you anymore." Needless to say she went psycho.

[/ QUOTE ]

Shoulda said it whilst doing her doggy style, and held on tight. It's as good as a rodeo!

[/ QUOTE ]

Good idea, maybe throw a donkey punch in there at the end for effect.

[steelcmg]

I didnt tell a girl this but one of my friends did. We still bust his balls about it all the time.
He said " I wish i could clone u so i could have one of u and ur BF could have the other.

[Duffman]

Put your mouth on it.

It was while we were hooking up and she started jerkin it. I thought it was a sweet line at the time.

[AndysDaddy]

There was this girl I really liked, but we were forever "just friends". One night I'm at her place watching a video. When it ended I got ready to leave, and she was cleaning up, getting ready to go to bed. I said (knowing it was corny, and just for the laugh) "Want me to tuck you in tonight?" It should have been a stupid line, but much to my surprise she said yes. It was incredible.
--
Scott

[arod15]

thats hot.

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
I didnt tell a girl this but one of my friends did. We still bust his balls about it all the time.
He said " I wish i could clone u so i could have one of u and ur BF could have the other.

[/ QUOTE ]
hahaha i wonder what girls say to this [censored].

[arod15]

[ QUOTE ]
Did she charge you more?

[/ QUOTE ]
what? trying to understand.

[jackdaniels]

He was replying to this:

Yesterday night I went to pick up this girl called Melanie.

As I get out of my car to greet her, I say,

"Oh hello Teresa"

...... ..... ....

Pwned by myself.

Lawrence

It's like on page 2 of this 10 page thread... You just realized you didn't understand it?

<font color="white"> He is implying that Lawrence was with a hooker </font>

[arod15]

ha

[arod15]

lol

[arod15]

whats a poker penguin?

[diebitter]

[ QUOTE ]
whats a poker penguin?

[/ QUOTE ]
Yep, that's a terrible line.