OK, Who Did it?

I was in the elevator the other day escorting my aunt and uncle to the airport terminal. There were 8 of us in the elevator. Me, my aunt, my uncle, my mom, some chubby guy, his less chubby friend, an old asian lady, and some middle aged indian lady. It seemed like a normal elevator ride until i hear the words...

Ok, Who did it? says my mom. It took me a few seconds to realize it, but when i did, OH OH I just died inside. It smelled like dieing rhinos covered in horse feces. No where to Run! No where to Hide! and another 15 or so seconds until we reached the ground floor. There was only one thing to do! Figure out who the damn perpetrator was! So I looked around and observed everyones reactions:

My mom - giving everybody the eye with that `who did it?` look

My aunt - looks left and bites her lip to prevent from laughing

My uncle - chuckles quietly

Indian lady - Stares at the digital elevator display thingy and tippy toes up and down.

Chubby guy - continually shakes his head left to right

His friend - bends over and starts coughing and laughing hysterically.

Asain lady - Completely oblivious to everything around her. Even the smell.

Me - Well i didn't do it. You crazy?!

Take a guess, I know who did it. Let's see if you can figure it out. Poll ends in exactly 3 days.

[Joshssj4]

Whoever smelled it dealt it, through logical reasoning it was your mother.

[offTopic]

He/She who smelt it, dealt it.

[Benal]

It's obvious that it's your mother.

[Talk2BigSteve]

I say the Indian lady bouncing on her tippy toes...she was probably squeezing her ass cheeks together to prevent the further onslaught of leatal Curry Powder Gas.

Big Steve /images/graemlins/cool.gif

[Hamish McBagpipe]

[ QUOTE ]
I just died inside.

[/ QUOTE ]

Obviously you are dying from embarrasment. You stink.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

The chubby guy's friend gave him away.

[swede123]

[ QUOTE ]
I say the Indian lady bouncing on her tippy toes...she was probably squeezing her ass cheeks together to prevent the further onslaught of leatal Curry Powder Gas.

Big Steve /images/graemlins/cool.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

It depends whether the Indian lady is a dot-indian or a feather-indian. My money's on the asian lady, she probably didn't even know she did it and some people don't seem to be able to smell their own.

Swede

[Luzion]

[ QUOTE ]
The chubby guy's friend gave him away.

[/ QUOTE ]

I vote for chubby guy too.. My experience shows me that he who smelt it, dealt it is rarely correct.

[private joker]

I'm surprised Uncle has so few votes. The quiet chuckle is that of a man who is amused by the stench he just unleashed. Sometimes when I rip ass in a confined space and everyone starts gagging and weeping, I can't help but emit a quiet chuckle of schadenfreude.

Also, if the OP "knows" who did it, then he would have to get verification from someone later on -- therefore it's someone related to him, not the Indian lady or chubby guy.

[Blarg]

Indian lady. Spicy food eaters extraordinaire, and from my limited experience, profoundly indifferent about personal odors.

[TStoneMBD]

noone laughs hysterically in that situation. something is up. i voted for the chubby guy's friend but now i realize that it was the chubby guy.

[kyro]

[ QUOTE ]
I was in the elevator the other day escorting my aunt and uncle to the airport terminal. There were 8 of us in the elevator. Me, my aunt, my uncle, my mom, some chubby guy, his less chubby friend, an old asian lady, and some middle aged indian lady. It seemed like a normal elevator ride until i hear the words...

Ok, Who did it? says my mom. It took me a few seconds to realize it, but when i did, OH OH I just died inside. It smelled like dieing rhinos covered in horse feces. No where to Run! No where to Hide! and another 15 or so seconds until we reached the ground floor. There was only one thing to do! Figure out who the damn perpetrator was! So I looked around and observed everyones reactions:

My mom - giving everybody the eye with that `who did it?` look

My aunt - looks left and bites her lip to prevent from laughing

My uncle - chuckles quietly

Indian lady - Stares at the digital elevator display thingy and tippy toes up and down.

Chubby guy - continually shakes his head left to right

His friend - bends over and starts coughing and laughing hysterically.

Asain lady - Completely oblivious to everything around her. Even the smell.

Me - Well i didn't do it. You crazy?!

Take a guess, I know who did it. Let's see if you can figure it out. Poll ends in exactly 3 days.

[/ QUOTE ]

[DMBFan23]

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quiet chuckle of schadenfreude

[/ QUOTE ]

thanks, I learned somethign today. cool word

[private joker]

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quiet chuckle of schadenfreude

[/ QUOTE ]

thanks, I learned somethign today. cool word

[/ QUOTE ]

"Germans have a word for everything."

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quiet chuckle of schadenfreude

[/ QUOTE ]

thanks, I learned somethign today. cool word

[/ QUOTE ]

"Germans have a word for everything."

[/ QUOTE ]

How do you pronounce that?

[Hal 2000]

"Wafting, wafting. Oh, everyone likes their own brand, don't they? That's magical. Smells like carrots and throw-up. Oh, that could gag a maggot. Smells like hot sick, ass in a dead carcass. Even stink would say that stinks. You know when you're in an apartment building, and you smell other peoples' cooking, and you say "What are they cookin'?" That, plus crap...

[Talk2BigSteve]

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noone laughs hysterically in that situation. something is up. i voted for the chubby guy's friend but now i realize that it was the chubby guy. Do You See Why?

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FYP

Big Steve /images/graemlins/cool.gif

[Blarg]

[ QUOTE ]
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quiet chuckle of schadenfreude

[/ QUOTE ]

thanks, I learned somethign today. cool word

[/ QUOTE ]

"Germans have a word for everything."

[/ QUOTE ]

And it's usually 30 letters long.

[private joker]

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How do you pronounce that?

[/ QUOTE ]

Schadenfreude: "SHAH-den-Froy-duh." Schadenfreude.

[gorie]

if you know who did it , it's most likely one of the people in your family (or you and you are proud of that stink bomb, too).

i voted asian lady but that was before i started wondering how you know the answer of who really did it. it's not like the asian lady or the fat guy fessed up after you left the elevator... or did they ?

the suspense is killing me.!

[pokerdirty]

[ QUOTE ]
Poll ends in exactly 3 days.

[/ QUOTE ]

3 days? you do know the average attention span of an 00tiot is about 37 seconds, right?

[Rockatansky]

Wow. You're like Nancy Drew, but for elevator farts.

[BillNye]

easy

Chubby guy - continually shakes his head left to right

His friend - bends over and starts coughing and laughing hysterically.

chubbys friend bends over and starts laughing, he wouldnt do that if it was himself, and he wouldnt bend over if it was a stranger, he knew it was his friend.

chubbo shakes his head like he cant believe that he produced something so great.

[touchfaith]

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Me - Well i didn't do it. You crazy?!

[/ QUOTE ]

Proof enough for me.

You did it.

[DasLeben]

[ QUOTE ]
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quiet chuckle of schadenfreude

[/ QUOTE ]

thanks, I learned somethign today. cool word

[/ QUOTE ]

Avenue Q pwns. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[BOTW]

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My aunt - looks left and bites her lip to prevent from laughing

[/ QUOTE ]

Avoidance and disinterest. Weak means strong.

I'll post results tomorrow afternoon.

[shant]

This is a great post from someone with so few posts. Keep it up.

[Vavavoom]

Chubby guy

[Spaded]

I did vote for the chubby guy's friend, but now that i think about it, if I were the chubby guy's friend and i did not rip the S.B.D., i still would have ended up busting out laughing.

Flatulence is god's gift to comedy. I can't help but to start cracking up when i am in a quiet room full of people and i'm wondering what it would be like if a juicy one was floppily ripped from the loose bowels of an anonymous individual. Or when a personal trainer is helping a man lift a large weight into the air and the man suddenly cuts one, weakening his muscles beacuse his brain is no longer in concentration due to his unexpected hysteria, and the weights drop like a stone.

Anyway, it was the aunt.

[craig r]

[ QUOTE ]
I did vote for the chubby guy's friend, but now that i think about it, if I were the chubby guy's friend and i did not rip the S.B.D., i still would have ended up busting out laughing.

Flatulence is god's gift to comedy. I can't help but to start cracking up when i am in a quiet room full of people and i'm wondering what it would be like if a juicy one was floppily ripped from the loose bowels of an anonymous individual. Or when a personal trainer is helping a man lift a large weight into the air and the man suddenly cuts one, weakening his muscles beacuse his brain is no longer in concentration due to his unexpected hysteria, and the weights drop like a stone.

Anyway, it was the aunt.

[/ QUOTE ]

I was talking to my ex the other day about farting. Why is it that no matter how old you get that sht is just as funny as when you were 4. Most other jokes you knew as a kid aren't funny anymore. Yet farting still remains a classic. Especially when the girl does it.

craig

p.s. Side question..does anybody ever feel the need to fart more during sex than at other times?

[siccjay]

I say it's Chubby Guys friend and Chubby Guy is shaking his because he knows that his friend did it. If I farted and someone said that my reaction would be the same as the friend.

[speirs]

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This is a great post from someone with so few posts. Keep it up.

[/ QUOTE ]

[speirs]

Oh and it's the Indian Lady busy squeezing out another one.

[Vish]

I'm going to approach this as a poker player: I read other people by paying attention to my own habits. What, then, would I do if I had farted in the elevator? I would pretend to be disgusted and shake my head. Hence, it's the chubby guy.

[Schneids]

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My aunt - looks left and bites her lip to prevent from laughing

[/ QUOTE ]

Avoidance and disinterest. Weak means strong.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is my thought too. People who look left (and down a smidge) are hiding something.

[BZ_Zorro]

Regardless of who did it, the chubby guy makes an excellent scapegoat. My money's on him.

[kyro]

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My aunt - looks left and bites her lip to prevent from laughing

[/ QUOTE ]

Avoidance and disinterest. Weak means strong.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is my thought too. People who look left (and down a smidge) are hiding something.

[/ QUOTE ]

This contest is over, if only because the guy with the avatar of Mario plowing the princess has spoken.

[Los Feliz Slim]

I voted Uncle, but I'm sure it's the Aunt. Uncle probably is very familiar with the Aunt's flatulence, increasing his level of amusement.

[astroglide]

i can't believe how most people don't realize "who smelt it dealt it" was invented by somebody who farted. they fart, somebody notices, and they use that to deflect the blame. it is by no means fact, and the people who say it are usually the ones who farted.

[JayLear]

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i can't believe how most people don't realize "who smelt it dealt it" was invented by somebody who farted. they fart, somebody notices, and they use that to deflect the blame. it is by no means fact, and the people who say it are usually the ones who farted.

[/ QUOTE ]

Seems like a pretty convenient stance you're taking on this.

[ChipWrecked]

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"who smelt it dealt it"

[/ QUOTE ]

Southern variant: Smeller's the feller.

[Ser William]

It has to be the chubby guy's friend. Think about it from his point of view. Normally if no one said anything you would just sit there and pray that you could get out of the elevator with dignity intact. But as soon as the mom says something, you have to just bust out laughing. The chubby guy is shaking his head because he probably gets accused of this kind of thing a lot, and often with good reason. This time however he is shaking his head out of embarrassment at his friend's actions, like saying "God you dork I can't believe you ripped one in public".

It was the chubby guy's friend, in the elevator, with the candlestick.

Was it my mom?
Sorry but logical reasoning doesnt apply this time.

Was it me? my aunt? my uncle?
You may have made the case that since i knew who it was that it had to be someone in my family. Sorry, but that logic is wrong.

So that leaves 4 people, Indian Lady, Asian lady, Chubby guy, and his friend.

Was it the Asian lady? I can see why some of you would pick her, but she really did lack the sense of smell.

Was it the indian lady? Sorry. She did look suspicious, but i don't think she had any spicy food that day.

That leaves two, the chubby guy and his friend.

There's a reason why the chubby guy shook his head. He knew that his good friend just laid a big one in the elevator. It was even more apparent when he looked at his friend and muttered the words "that is so wrong". Of course if i told you this it would be too obvious.

So that makes Mr. Chubby boy's friend our winner.

Congratulations to everyone who got it right.

[LoaferGee12]

[ QUOTE ]
It has to be the chubby guy's friend. Think about it from his point of view. Normally if no one said anything you would just sit there and pray that you could get out of the elevator with dignity intact. But as soon as the mom says something, you have to just bust out laughing. The chubby guy is shaking his head because he probably gets accused of this kind of thing a lot, and often with good reason. This time however he is shaking his head out of embarrassment at his friend's actions, like saying "God you dork I can't believe you ripped one in public".

It was the chubby guy's friend, in the elevator, with the candlestick.

[/ QUOTE ]

*applause*

[kyro]

[ QUOTE ]
Was it my mom?
Sorry but logical reasoning doesnt apply this time.

Was it me? my aunt? my uncle?
You may have made the case that since i knew who it was that it had to be someone in my family. Sorry, but that logic is wrong.

So that leaves 4 people, Indian Lady, Asian lady, Chubby guy, and his friend.

Was it the Asian lady? I can see why some of you would pick her, but she really did lack the sense of smell.

Was it the indian lady? Sorry. She did look suspicious, but i don't think she had any spicy food that day.

That leaves two, the chubby guy and his friend.

There's a reason why the chubby guy shook his head. He knew that his good friend just laid a big one in the elevator. It was even more apparent when he looked at his friend and muttered the words "that is so wrong". Of course if i told you this it would be too obvious.

So that makes Mr. Chubby boy's friend our winner.

Congratulations to everyone who got it right.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wow, such promise. And you end it with such lameness.

[Hal 2000]

If you can't lay a fart in an elevator, you take life way too seriously.

[gorie]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Was it my mom?
Sorry but logical reasoning doesnt apply this time.

Was it me? my aunt? my uncle?
You may have made the case that since i knew who it was that it had to be someone in my family. Sorry, but that logic is wrong.

So that leaves 4 people, Indian Lady, Asian lady, Chubby guy, and his friend.

Was it the Asian lady? I can see why some of you would pick her, but she really did lack the sense of smell.

Was it the indian lady? Sorry. She did look suspicious, but i don't think she had any spicy food that day.

That leaves two, the chubby guy and his friend.

There's a reason why the chubby guy shook his head. He knew that his good friend just laid a big one in the elevator. It was even more apparent when he looked at his friend and muttered the words "that is so wrong". Of course if i told you this it would be too obvious.

So that makes Mr. Chubby boy's friend our winner.

Congratulations to everyone who got it right.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wow, such promise. And you end it with such lameness.

[/ QUOTE ]
dude, it's not like he can control who the real farter was.
i thought it was a fun thread. i haven't gotten any sleep in 2 days all i kept thinking was "who WAS it ??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[Sheepscot]

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Wow, such promise. And you end it with such lameness.

[/ QUOTE ]
dude, it's not like he can control who the real farter was.
i thought it was a fun thread. i haven't gotten any sleep in 2 days all i kept thinking was "who WAS it ??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[/ QUOTE ]

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[private joker]

[ QUOTE ]
It was even more apparent when he looked at his friend and muttered the words "that is so wrong".

[/ QUOTE ]

This evidence does not satisfy me. People often deflect responsibility to someone by accusing them. Once I was driving in a car with my girlfriend and a habitual farting friend sitting shotgun. My friend fired a stink bomb at 60mph and my girlfriend in the back seat immediately noticed. "Ewww!" she said. My friend suppressed a smile and pointed at me, saying, "He did it! Dude, that is not cool. Not cool at all. Open a goddamn window!"

Now, my girlfriend was wise enough to know that my friend doth protest too much and thus was clearly the culprit. But it goes to prove that merely by telling your friend that what "he" did was "so wrong" does not rest the case.

[TheWorstPlayer]

This is true. In fact, some people will drop disgusting bombs and then turn to their friends and go 'oh my god! that was so wrong...' as if to apologize or in pride or whatever.

How can this thread get over 50 replies...ridiculous. I gotta get out of here.

Many

[kyro]

[ QUOTE ]
I gotta get out of here.

Many

[/ QUOTE ]

MB, this is the only correct statement you've ever made.

[chisness]

why am i not surprised that the asian was clueless about her surroundings?

[ptmusic]

[ QUOTE ]
The chubby guy's friend gave him away.

[/ QUOTE ]

I say it's his friend. He coughs, cracks up, then blurts out "it was me" and keeps cracking himself up. Meanwhile, chubby guy was shaking his head left and right because he has been smelled his friend before, and chubby guy can't believe his friend has done it again.

-ptmusic

[ptmusic]

I had just read the first few when I replied. But I got it right - I am on some kind of a godsend roll: first the extremely difficult rocks riddle, then the "it's like a puzzle with pans" challenge, then this!

I am so talented.

-ptmusic

[Matty]

We need a new moderator whose sole job is to edit the original post (and title) of threads like these with the updated results. I need resolution, yet I have no attention span.

[private joker]

[ QUOTE ]
We need a new moderator whose sole job is to edit the original post (and title) of threads like these with the updated results. I need resolution, yet I have no attention span.

[/ QUOTE ]

But we'll never know who did it. That's the annoying thing. OP doesn't really know for sure.

[AncientPC]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I was in the elevator the other day escorting my aunt and uncle to the airport terminal. There were 8 of us in the elevator. Me, my aunt, my uncle, my mom, some chubby guy, his less chubby friend, an old asian lady, and some middle aged indian lady. It seemed like a normal elevator ride until i hear the words...

Ok, Who did it? says my mom. It took me a few seconds to realize it, but when i did, OH OH I just died inside. It smelled like dieing rhinos covered in horse feces. No where to Run! No where to Hide! and another 15 or so seconds until we reached the ground floor. There was only one thing to do! Figure out who the damn perpetrator was! So I looked around and observed everyones reactions:

My mom - giving everybody the eye with that `who did it?` look

My aunt - looks left and bites her lip to prevent from laughing

My uncle - chuckles quietly

Indian lady - Stares at the digital elevator display thingy and tippy toes up and down.

Chubby guy - continually shakes his head left to right

His friend - bends over and starts coughing and laughing hysterically.

Asain lady - Completely oblivious to everything around her. Even the smell.

Me - Well i didn't do it. You crazy?!

Take a guess, I know who did it. Let's see if you can figure it out. Poll ends in exactly 3 days.

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

[trying2learn]

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I gotta get out of here.

Many

[/ QUOTE ]

MB, this is the only correct statement you've ever made.

[/ QUOTE ]

[lu_hawk]

it's usually the dog. was there a dog around?