View Full Version : worst places to get a boner
I find it pretty annoying to get one at the gym because it's a lot more noticeable through gym shorts than a pair of jeans, how bout you? The city bus and any family gathering are also bad.
imported_The Vibesman
08-04-2005, 01:02 PM
On my forehead. Hate getting them there.
Claunchy
08-04-2005, 01:02 PM
What are you, 13?
In jail. While showering.
DarkForceRising
08-04-2005, 01:04 PM
The locker room around a bunch of other dudes.
codewarrior
08-04-2005, 01:04 PM
How sad. Anyplace I get a boner would be noticeable. Getting one in jeans is impossible, unless you wear them down around the bottom of your ass crack like the younglings do.
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What are you, 13?
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obviously...cant u see my pic
Edge34
08-04-2005, 01:05 PM
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How sad. Anyplace I get a boner would be noticeable. Getting one in jeans is impossible, unless you wear them down around the bottom of your ass crack like the younglings do.
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I'm thinking you need to let the little one breathe a little bit...
asofel
08-04-2005, 01:06 PM
I don't think he needs to be 13 actually to have this happen. I seem to have an issue with buses. Just this morning I was half asleep on a bus, we get to my stop and dammit...hand in front, uhhh, i'm fixing my watch....down here for some reason.....routine... don't know why it happens, definitely seems to be a pattern....
Brainwalter
08-04-2005, 01:08 PM
In your butt.
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In your butt.
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true true
NoTalent
08-04-2005, 01:23 PM
In church right before communion
Blarg
08-04-2005, 01:47 PM
While watching gay porn naked with your parents. That is SO embarassing.
pokerdirty
08-04-2005, 01:56 PM
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On my forehead. Hate getting them there.
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http://www.lifeinwidescreen.com/siihp/head.jpg
i had a french class in h.s. with all girls... i got one and had to go write something on the chalk board
MrTrik
08-04-2005, 05:53 PM
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i had a french class in h.s. with all girls... i got one and had to go write something on the chalk board
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Impressive. How did you hold on to the chalk?
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i had a french class in h.s. with all girls... i got one and had to go write something on the chalk board
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Impressive. How did you hold on to the chalk?
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thinking about sports is usually pretty effective
tdarko
08-04-2005, 06:02 PM
not exactly a definate place but i have worked a chub a few times watching my gf's hot mom run on the treadmill...i need to stop thinking about this!
JoePro
08-04-2005, 06:05 PM
I hear ya.. Used to fall asleep and wake up with a boner ALL THE TIME riding he bus.
jacki
08-04-2005, 06:22 PM
In your ass.
tworooks
08-04-2005, 06:26 PM
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In your ass.
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It was funny the first time.
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In your ass.
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It was funny the first time.
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seriously....
Klepton
08-04-2005, 07:00 PM
it's actually an optical illusion...the pleats in the pants...i'm gonna go return them now...don't act like you're not impressed
tworooks
08-04-2005, 07:01 PM
One of the greatest movies ever made
kipin
08-04-2005, 07:01 PM
In your rear-end.
LOLZzzz!!111
kipin
08-04-2005, 07:02 PM
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One of the greatest movies ever made
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Isn't this from Curb Your Enthusiasm... a TV show, not a movie?
oneeye13
08-04-2005, 07:13 PM
elephant walking in a frat initiation
warlockjd
08-04-2005, 08:22 PM
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Isn't this from Curb Your Enthusiasm... a TV show, not a movie?
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Thje quote is Anchorman. CYE had a similar situation
James Boston
08-04-2005, 08:30 PM
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i'm gonna go return them now... to the...pants store...
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FYP
That's the funniest part of the line. You can't leave it out.
jacki
08-04-2005, 08:33 PM
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In your ass.
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It was funny the first time.
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seriously....
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i didn't read the whole thread before posting.
Give me my cigarette and put me in front of the firing squad now.
phil_ivey_fan
08-04-2005, 08:52 PM
I just pull the age ol "up n tuck".
and if you are getting one at the gym while you are working out, you are doing something wrong. When you workout, your muscles (the ones being worked...I know the penis is a muscle) are pooling the majority of your blood into their bellies; hence there is less blood to fill the penis.
kurosh
08-04-2005, 09:00 PM
This has never happened to me and I've never seen it happen, but if it happened during wrestling (the actual sport), I'm pretty sure you'd get your ass kicked.
hoopsie44
08-04-2005, 09:03 PM
Jammed in your dumper.
The Stranger
08-04-2005, 09:06 PM
I'm sure various parts of a physical exam rank right up there.
Riskwise
08-04-2005, 09:14 PM
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In your ass.
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It was funny the first time.
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seriously....
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i didn't read the whole thread before posting.
Give me my cigarette and put me in front of the firing squad now.
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http://img244.imageshack.us/img244/2742/flame0oi.jpg
jacki
08-04-2005, 09:46 PM
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Jammed in your dumper.
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Congratulations! You're more retarded than me.
Sephus
08-04-2005, 09:49 PM
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I know the penis is a muscle
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just because a guy on TV lifted a bucket of paint with his wang doesn't mean it's a muscle.
arod15
08-04-2005, 10:18 PM
If your a wrestler right before a match in those unitards they make you wear thats gay....
Tyler Durden
08-04-2005, 10:24 PM
I don't see why it's a problem...just throw your hand down there and pipeline it (stick your penis straight up so it's resting against the wasitband). problem solved. you guys are morans. all of you.
Sephus
08-04-2005, 11:19 PM
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I don't see why it's a problem...just throw your hand down there and pipeline it (stick your penis straight up so it's resting against the wasitband). problem solved. you guys are morans. all of you.
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this is of course the best solution but not a perfect one.
joeski19
08-04-2005, 11:33 PM
Hugging Grandma.
HopeydaFish
08-05-2005, 12:30 AM
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Hugging Grandma at Grandpa's funeral.
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FYP
Dominic
12-03-2005, 09:24 PM
probably when you get thrown into a holding cell with a bunch of hard-ass dude after being arrested because you got drunk and took your pants off.
radek2166
12-03-2005, 09:56 PM
Never? Unless In jail or in the shower with a bunch of guys and maybe the locker room.
smoore
12-03-2005, 10:01 PM
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I don't see why it's a problem...just throw your hand down there and pipeline it (stick your penis straight up so it's resting against the wasitband). problem solved. you guys are morans. all of you.
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I guess some guys just don't have the reach.
Around alot of 8yo girls. Just watched alfie.
In the shower at highschool. If it happens to you you will be immortalized.
There was a dude in 1985 named Mike Swanson who had it happen to him. We still bring up that story and it is still funny.
Do they still shower in groups in highschool or is it all private now?
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In the shower at highschool. If it happens to you you will be immortalized.
There was a dude in 1985 named Mike Swanson who had it happen to him. We still bring up that story and it is still funny.
Do they still shower in groups in highschool or is it all private now?
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Come on, this used to be a poker site. Nobody on here could possibly be of highschool age!
~D
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I find it pretty annoying to get one at the gym because it's a lot more noticeable through gym shorts than a pair of jeans, how bout you? The city bus and any family gathering are also bad.
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Hands down, at the doctor when you're about to have your junk examined, unless your doc is a hot chick
David04
12-03-2005, 11:44 PM
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Do they still shower in groups in highschool or is it all private now?
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Almost all are group showers.
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In your ass.
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It was funny the first time.
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seriously....
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i didn't read the whole thread before posting.
Give me my cigarette and put me in front of the firing squad now.
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http://img244.imageshack.us/img244/2742/flame0oi.jpg
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the middle of a firey inferno, also a terrible place to get a boner
JackWilson
12-04-2005, 02:25 AM
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I don't think he needs to be 13 actually to have this happen. I seem to have an issue with buses. Just this morning I was half asleep on a bus, we get to my stop and dammit...hand in front, uhhh, i'm fixing my watch....down here for some reason.....routine... don't know why it happens, definitely seems to be a pattern....
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I'm pretty sure someone explained this as having to do with the vibrations you feel on a bus.
Cyrus
12-04-2005, 02:44 AM
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Hugging Grandma at Grandpa's funeral.
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Good point. How many have done it right after or during a funeral service ?
I'm telling you, young 'uns, there's some serious saianteefick research on the subject!
I never have, but everytime I go, I always think how awkward it would be to get a boner while the doctor is touching my balls.
I'm also thinking of finding a hot female doctor and trying to get a boner as a conversation starter while she checks my balls.
MonkeeMan
12-04-2005, 04:58 AM
Hard for her to talk with a mouth full of junk.
masse75
12-04-2005, 12:08 PM
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I know the penis is a muscle... hence there is less blood to fill the penis.
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Actually, it's an organ, not a muscle, but your point is taken.
eviljeff
12-04-2005, 12:15 PM
in this thread
http://www.pacifier.com/~mvcs/MVCS%20Pictures/Playground%20Kindergarten.JPG
Cancuk
12-04-2005, 01:28 PM
In a guys ass.
eviljeff
12-04-2005, 02:52 PM
when around sex party mom (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=0&Number=3967226&page=0&fpart=all &vc=1)
TheMainEvent
12-04-2005, 03:01 PM
Personally, just randomly getting a boner in public without it being from somebody touching it is a problem I stopped having when I was like 17. I guess that means I'm headed to ED land.
PokerGoblin
12-04-2005, 03:04 PM
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The locker room around a bunch of other dudes.
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Does this happen to you often?
DcifrThs
12-04-2005, 03:07 PM
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One of the greatest movies ever made
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Isn't this from Curb Your Enthusiasm... a TV show, not a movie?
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mr burgendy, you have massive erection.
Barron
at a waterpark
crowded+noshirt+cant just hold it with waistband+hot girls in bikinis = very bad place to be when you havent had any in a while
"mr burgendy, you have massive erection."
its the pants, an optical allusion, im about to take them back to the ..pants store right now
How about in church. Don't think anyone said that one yet
CORed
12-04-2005, 03:47 PM
One of the few good things about getting older is that I rarely get an erection unless I really want one. One of the bad things is sometimes it doesn't happen even when I want it to happen. Oh well, that's what they make those little blue pills for. But I do remember the teens and 20's when any random thought about sex could trigger an instantaneous erectin that could only be relieved by finding a private place to rub one out.
When i was in school, a buddy of mine was in a two man play being done in front of pretty much our entire department. His costume was shirtless with sweat pants, the other actor was male. Opening night, it took all of five minutes for him to get to full mast, and he did the only thing he could, kept performing and ignored the extrusion. The play was half an hour. Who needs the little blue pill.
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Opening night, it took all of five minutes for him to get to full mast
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was he trying to get it up?
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Opening night, it took all of five minutes for him to get to full mast
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was he trying to get it up?
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Negatory.
Landon_McFly
12-05-2005, 03:32 AM
reminds me of that show loveline with dr. drew. i remember an episode where a guy called in that was concerned about is brother because his little brother was betting money with friends at school who could get a boner first.
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