Are my friends retarded?

[kurosh]

I got bored a few days ago and the fighting a dog thread inspired me, so in my livejournal I made this entry. I thought it was obvious that this was a joke.

[ QUOTE ]
I need some advice. Notice how I haven't posted any poker updates lately? Well... I lost a lot of money. I'm actually in debt. Going to that poker hall the guy in my anger management class recommended was a bad idea. I owe 20k to one of the guys there. I didn't know it at the time, but they're a rather shady bunch. I found out he runs a pitbull fighting ring, along with god knows what else. Anyhow, he wants the 20k in 2 weeks. Yes, I realize I'm an idiot for borrowing 20k from a random person in a shady underground poker hall full of old businessmen, that's beside point. When someone just offers you 20k, it's kinda hard to not take it.

I told him I didn't have it and there was no way I could make it in 2 weeks. He says I can either give him the 20k OR, get this, I can fight one of his pitbulls. Apparently it's not that unusual but it's hard to find people to do it. I'd have to go up to Chicago but I think that's the least of my problems. Taking on an attack trained dog shouldn't be that hard, right? I'm about 5'7" 130lbs. I must have at least 50lbs on it, intelligence, more natural weapons (he only has his jaw) and reach.

Anyone? Opinions? I think I can take it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Every single one of my friends believed it. Isn't it obvious that story is made up? I mean, come on, a death match with a pitbull for 20k?

Yesterday, my mom came into my room and started asking me if I was in trouble. She went into a speech on how my parents love me more than anyone and they can help me, etc. I tell her I'm fine. She then accuses me of being in debt and losing all my money. She starts yelling at me about how these people will kill me if I don't pay them. I'm under the influence of... something. I have to control myself from laughing so I hold my head in my hands and lean on my desk. I'm assuming this looks like a very guilty pose. She won't stop talking about how she will help me and I should get a loan from the bank to pay them off. Eventually, she tells me to look her in the eye and tell her. This same influence would make it blatantly obvious if I looked her in the face, so, obviously, I can't do that. I end up leaving without looking her in the face, going to steak n shake and stuffing myself silly.

Moral of the story, my mom is a dumbass and apparently reads my livejournal. It pisses me off that she does it without telling me, called me a liar and won't say why she thinks I'm in debt. I need ideas on my next entry to drive her crazy. I'm considering talking about my new boyfriend or coke habit.

[tbach24]

It should be this:

"This will be my last post for a couple weeks, I'm heading off to Chicago, I hope to see you all soon"

followed in 2 weeks by this:

"WOW THAT WAS EXILIERATING!!!! I won my way through the pitbull fighting ranks and earnt 100k before killing everybody and stealing their cocaine."

[IggyWH]

Move out of your mothers house maybe?

[Eurotrash]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm considering talking about my new boyfriend or

[/ QUOTE ]


wait, I thought you were looking for fake/made-up stories to post

[GoblinMason (Craig)]

Tell here it's a joke?

Also, Link to comments?

-Craig

[SippinSoma]

Tell your mom the truth.

[kurosh]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
um, are you retarded? seriously, if you fight a pitbull, it's going to tear you the [censored] apart. i suggest you come up with the money and never act so stupid ever again.

[/ QUOTE ]kurosh:AT MOST, it's a 70lb DOG. i'm a 130lb HUMAN. i will kick it in the head. end of story.

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I've gotta say, I haven't really heard of anything so stupid. Your best bet at this point is to Party Poker your [censored] ass off, and hope for the best. Fighting Dogs are starved and vicious, and WILL seriously injure you.

[/ QUOTE ]kurosh:wtf? why does no one have faith in me. I AM BIGGER, STRONGER AND SMARTER.

[/ QUOTE ]:\ Bigger, anyway.

[/ QUOTE ]download some of those "when animals attack" videos if you don't believe that a 70 lb. dog can [censored] you up.

[/ QUOTE ]kurosh:have you read the news lately? a 70 year old man killed a leopard with his bare hands. leopard > pitbull. if a 70 year old man can kill a leopard, i sure as hell can [censored] up a pitbull.

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
hmmm yikes. i suggest that you get yourself out of this mess the same way you got in. have you other means of earning cash through your ridiculous poker skills? rely on what's gotten you this far, and use it. good luck man.

[/ QUOTE ]

I let people in on it after this point because a couple were freaking out and worrying about me a lot.

[tbach24]

That was so awesome until you let them into it. Weak dude.

[kurosh]

Ok, but, isn't this blatantly a joke? It's not just one or two people who fell for this, it's EVERYONE.

[vulturesrow]

[ QUOTE ]
Ok, but, isn't this blatantly a joke? It's not just one or two people who fell for this, it's EVERYONE.

[/ QUOTE ]

You need smarter friends. And tell your mom the truth.

[Eurotrash]

[ QUOTE ]
Ok, but, isn't this blatantly a joke? It's not just one or two people who fell for this, it's EVERYONE.

[/ QUOTE ]


it seems pretty obvious to me that this is a jopke, so to speak

[scotty34]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I've gotta say, I haven't really heard of anything so stupid. Your best bet at this point is to Party Poker your [censored] ass off, and hope for the best. Fighting Dogs are starved and vicious, and WILL seriously injure you.

[/ QUOTE ]kurosh:wtf? why does no one have faith in me. I AM BIGGER, STRONGER AND SMARTER.

[/ QUOTE ]:\ Bigger, anyway.

[/ QUOTE ]

pwned

[Victor]

you should be able to talk to your mom stoned. its not that hard.

also, you should tell her the truth. its not cool to drive your mom crazy. someday you will realize how much moms worry and will feel bad for all the times you gave grief.

[scotty34]

[ QUOTE ]
Ok, but, isn't this blatantly a joke? It's not just one or two people who fell for this, it's EVERYONE.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think we all realize its a joke because of two reasons. One is we read OOT and read that dog fighting thread. Two is we are poker players, and have a better understanding of how this life works. Many people who aren't really into the whole poker scene view it as very scary, and where you would run into a lot of shady characters and situations (which in some cases may be true).

[Stuey]

The simple fact that people that "know" you thought you were badass enough to try fighting the dog should make you very proud. They clearly think you are capable of anything. Very nice.

[OtisTheMarsupial]

OK, so if EVERYONE believed it, then either

1) ALL your friends and family are stupid and will believe anything or
2) you have been known to do really stupid things in the past, thus they have reason to believe it

Now really, which do you think is more probable?

[jgunnip]

I think the whole story is made up, no livejournal, no mom freaking out... anyway..

IF it is true, then..

[ QUOTE ]
Every single one of my friends believed it.

[/ QUOTE ]

O MY GOD

[shant]

[ QUOTE ]
Tell your mom the truth.

[/ QUOTE ]

[beeyjay]

these chics i know asked me about how poker was going a while ago and my drunk ass rambled off a story similar to this and a few days later I was hearing from a bunch of people that they heard i was in trouble and wanting to know if everything was going to be alright. people are dumb.

[jakethebake]

Post about how you're earning the money in the men's room down at the bus station. Or someone is hiring you to "hit" their spouse or something. Or some mention of your mom's life insurance policy.

[kyro]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Ok, but, isn't this blatantly a joke? It's not just one or two people who fell for this, it's EVERYONE.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think we all realize its a joke because of two reasons. One is we read OOT and read that dog fighting thread. Two is we are poker players, and have a better understanding of how this life works. Many people who aren't really into the whole poker scene view it as very scary, and where you would run into a lot of shady characters and situations (which in some cases may be true).

[/ QUOTE ]

That's weak. I can guarantee you if I never played poker or read OOT I would have laughed at his initial entry.

[morgant]

ummmm, wtf? I surmise you are a kid because you are living at your moms, but, why cant she read your live journal, you are making a public jornal for ANYONE to read. Why cant she?

She is your mom for crying out loud, why would you try to torture her more with your bs. Also with the way you play poker, I can understand why they believe you would be 20k in debt.

Your friends are fine, you are clearly the retarded one.

[TheIrishThug]

feel free to mess with ur friends and drag it out as long as u can, but i see no reason y u were not up front with ur mom

[MMMMMM]

[ QUOTE ]

Moral of the story, my mom is a dumbass and apparently reads my livejournal. It pisses me off that she does it without telling me, called me a liar and won't say why she thinks I'm in debt. I need ideas on my next entry to drive her crazy. I'm considering talking about my new boyfriend or coke habit.

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, you could post about how you went to the casino with $500 to play blackjack, hoping to win enough to cover your $20,000 debt, and ran it up to $73,000 in 6 hours--and then lost it all back, including your original $500.

But really you only have one mom and should be nice to her even if she is a dumbass.

[man]

[ QUOTE ]
Moral of the story, my mom is a dumbass

[/ QUOTE ]
you spelled "cares about me and I am really, really bad at coming clean with stupid stuff that I do" wrong.

it's not that hard, dude. and yes your friends are naive, but you have to admit that once one person believes it, it becomes easier for the next person to believe it and so on. silly groupthink.

[jakethebake]

Oh come on, people. If you can't play a good joke on your mom, who can you?

[gamblore99]

Your kinda taking your mom for granted. You are making her suffer a lot. In the past I have gone out all night and come back the next day to find her sitting up shaking/in tears. its suffering. tell her the truth.

It's really really funny your friends believed that. nice work there.

[morgant]

i dont think you guys understand the high variance take a shot poker kurosh plays. his being stuck 20k that he doesnt have isnt improbable in the least.

jake, playing a joke on mom is always ok, but he is doing it out of spite in a vindictive nature because she read his PUBLIC live journal...

pot, kettle, black

[bronzepiglet]

[ QUOTE ]
I let people in on it after this point because a couple were freaking out and worrying about me a lot.

[/ QUOTE ]

It's kind of bizarre that you felt you needed to tell your friends after they started worrying a lot, but not your mom, who was clearly worried out of her mind.

She's probably the only one who will care about you no matter what... and she was the only one trying to cough up $20k to get you out of this hypothetical mess (not that kids can come up with that).

If this is for real I'd tell her immediately and beg for forgiveness. If I were her I would take your computer away for 6 months for ruining my life for a few days.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
jake, playing a joke on mom is always ok, but he is doing it out of spite in a vindictive nature because she read his PUBLIC live journal...

[/ QUOTE ]

Yea. I wasn't really clear on why he thought everyone in the world except his mom should read his blog.

[OtisTheMarsupial]

[ QUOTE ]
you spelled "cares about me and I am really, really bad at coming clean with stupid stuff that I do" wrong.


[/ QUOTE ]
brilliant!

[kurosh]

My mom accused me of being a liar and wouldn't tell me why she thinks it. When she comes clean with me and tells me she reads my blog, then I'll tell her.

[vulturesrow]

[ QUOTE ]
My mom accused me of being a liar and wouldn't tell me why she thinks it. When she comes clean with me and tells me she reads my blog, then I'll tell her.

[/ QUOTE ]

I hope one day you have a kid who is as much of a s<font color="black">hit</font> as you are.

[poker-penguin]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
My mom accused me of being a liar and wouldn't tell me why she thinks it. When she comes clean with me and tells me she reads my blog, then I'll tell her.

[/ QUOTE ]

I hope you never breed

[/ QUOTE ]

FYP

[SpearsBritney]

I'm calling B.S. on the mom thing too.

[Chaostracize]

That's pretty much awesome.

[jakethebake]

So is your mom hot, kurosh? What would she be willing to do if someone showed up at your house saying you owed them a lot of money?

[kurosh]

Only if you like big and hairy foreign women.

[kurosh]

Jake, I have to say, I think you're very sexy.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
Jake, I have to say, I think you're very sexy.

[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/wink.gif

[chaas4747]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Jake, I have to say, I think you're very sexy.

[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/wink.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Who's the chic Jake?

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
Who's the chic Jake?

[/ QUOTE ]

Either the latest gimmick account or Merctec's girlfriend. (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&amp;Number=2726691&amp;page=1&amp;view=colla psed&amp;sb=5&amp;o=14&amp;fpart=1)

[Deftoner]

[ QUOTE ]
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[ QUOTE ]
My mom accused me of being a liar and wouldn't tell me why she thinks it. When she comes clean with me and tells me she reads my blog, then I'll tell her.

[/ QUOTE ]

I hope you never breed

[/ QUOTE ]

FYP

[/ QUOTE ]

Hilarious.

[jgunnip]

[ QUOTE ]
My mom accused me of being a liar and wouldn't tell me why she thinks it. When she comes clean with me and tells me she reads my blog, then I'll tell her.

[/ QUOTE ]

If the story is true at all...then this line of thinking is fine. If shes not gonna be front with you then there's no need for you to tell her it was a joke. However, purposely trying to fool her out of spite is a bit over the line imo/

[jakethebake]

HOLY CRAP! Has anyone actual seen his livejournal blog thingy? /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[vulturesrow]

[ QUOTE ]
HOLY CRAP! Has anyone actual seen his livejournal blog thingy? /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[/ QUOTE ]


Got a link? /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
Got a link? /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Well it's at livejournal.com and his name is "kurosh".

[vulturesrow]

Now I understand why there is so much dead money in poker these days. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
Now I understand why there is so much dead money in poker these days. /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

You read some of it? Holy Crap! Right?

[vulturesrow]

Yeah I read it. 10 minutes of my life I'll never get back.