french girl

[bholdr]

I just rented an apartment to a french girl that's in town for six months working for the chamber of commerce. What is it with french women? She dresses kind of plainly, wears no make up, and has a sorta plain-jane hairstyle, etc... but she's still H-O-T. more beautiful than hot, really, and more pretty than beautiful, now that i think of it, but VERY pretty.

sparkling eyes, etc... Unfourtunatly, my business association with her (as the building super) precludes the possibility of an... interaction. *sighs*

got any witty things i can say in french, etc?

...and she's at my door asking me to help move a futon. It's not my job, but how can i refuse?
damn fine.

[shakingspear]

The only thing I ever really knew how to say in French was au coin de la rue. It means on the corner of the street. I said it to a sub once and she almost threw me out of class because she thought I was calling her a hooker.

So give it a try.

[MEbenhoe]

[ QUOTE ]
I just rented an apartment to a french girl that's in town for six months working for the chamber of commerce. What is it with french women? She dresses kind of plainly, wears no make up, and has a sorta plain-jane hairstyle, etc

[/ QUOTE ]

because girls who look good without makeup, fancy clothes, or fancy hair are the best girls of all.

[sexypanda]

Try: "Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?"

Perhaps try singing it. Works every time.

[Stuck]

Yeah, and if that doesn't work try "Mocha Chocolata ya ya". They're a sucker for that one.

[xadrez]

Je suis le bombe atomique!

[sexypanda]

Seriously, you could try:

Bonjour - hi
Ca va? - what's up? how are you?
Ca va bien - I'm good
Merci - thank you
De rien - you're welcome (It was nothing)
If she asks "parlez-vous francais?"
You can say: "un peut" (a little) or "seulment pour vous" (only for you)

I took french for like 6 years (but that was a long time ago), so if you need anything else let me know.

[Ulysses]

[ QUOTE ]
Unfourtunatly, my business association with her (as the building super) precludes the possibility of an... interaction. *sighs*

[/ QUOTE ]

WTF? You are the super of an apartment, not the CEO of some Fortune 500 corporation worried about hooking up w/ some hot underling.

Hell, Bill Clinton was the f'ing PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA and he still had his intern blow him.

So, I think you can let this one slide.

[pryor15]

oo-la-la

actually, you could watch amelie or something and see what you could come up w/

or better yet, tell us how we can "accidentally" run into her, should we be in the area

[jakethebake]

Au Mon Cheri...

http://pages.prodigy.net/ehammer/pepe.jpg

[gumpzilla]

When I first started in grad school, I was out with some of my colleagues and we met a couple of female philosophy grad students. One was a pretty hot French girl. I [censored] you not, the first thing one of my friends said to her was, "So, what's up with French maids?" (This same guy also attempted to defuse an awkward situation once where the dorkiest guy we know told a random black guy in the smoking room at a bowling alley to "Keep it real" by saying "Excuse my friend, he doesn't know how to talk to African-Americans." I walked into the room after this happened and the vibe was unreal. I was told the details later.) I still laugh thinking about it.

[offTopic]

collez-le dans son pooper

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
got any witty things i can say in french, etc?

[/ QUOTE ]
Don't do it. You're sure to botch the hell out of the pronunciation. Your only hope for this angle is that she sees it as funny and/or flattering that you're trying. In that case, you can get by with the simplist things - parlez-vous francais, etc. Call her 'mon petite chou' (my little cabbage) or 'mon cheri' (my darling). It's been a while, so I don't know how dated these phrases are.

[drewjustdrew]

If she sneezes say "a votre sante" (pronounced saant - hard A) - to your health

If it is raining really hard say "il pleut comme un vache qui pisse" - it's raining like a pissing cow

"qu'est-ce qui se passe" (pronounced quickly "keskee spaass") what's going on?

"comment va tu" - (silent "t" in comment) - how are you (really how do you go)

"pas de rien" (silent "s" ) - it was nothing

"mon crayon est large et jaune" - my pencil is big and yellow

if she says something you don't believe, say "mon oeil" (pronounced kinda like oy) - my eye

[stabn]

[ QUOTE ]
collez-le dans son pooper

[/ QUOTE ]

awesome.

[ChicagoTroy]

There is nothing unethical about you dating her.

[lucas9000]

Il n'y a pas de femmes frigides. Il n'y a que de mauvaises langues…
L'intelligence, on croit toujours en avoir assez, vu que c'est avec ça qu'on juge…
Si la merde avait de la valeur, les pauvres naîtraient sans trou du cul
Fait du bien a Bretrand il te le rend en caguant!

[schwza]

[ QUOTE ]
"Excuse my friend, he doesn't know how to talk to African-Americans."

[/ QUOTE ]

awesome.

[fluff]

Let me be the first to say:

http://www.basketballboards.net/forum/images/smilies/ttiwwop.gif

Edit:

Oh and also, "Can you help me move my futon?" is code for "Stick it in my pooper!" in French, so I think you're good to go.

[Stuck]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
collez-le dans son pooper

[/ QUOTE ]

awesome.

[/ QUOTE ]

Shouldn't it be 'sa pooper'?

[asofel]

[ QUOTE ]
Il n'y a pas de femmes frigides. Il n'y a que de mauvaises langues…
L'intelligence, on croit toujours en avoir assez, vu que c'est avec ça qu'on juge…
Si la merde avait de la valeur, les pauvres naîtraient sans trou du cul
Fait du bien a Bretrand il te le rend en caguant!

[/ QUOTE ]

I'll nail ya against the fridge, baby. I'll nail ya with my moving words. Your intelligence, and wonderful wide ass, I want to love with my huge manhood. If [censored] awaits on my valour, I'll find a new way for some nutrients. If however your name is actually Bertrand, I'll rend apart your pooper!

I have a gift for languages.

[sexypanda]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
collez-le dans son pooper

[/ QUOTE ]

awesome.

[/ QUOTE ]

Shouldn't it be 'sa pooper'?

[/ QUOTE ]

I think that depends on whether the noun "pooper" is masculine or feminine, not the person. I don't know what sex "pooper" is though.

[Rduke55]

Je suis un idiot essayant de vous impressionner.

Or something like that.

[lucas9000]

Vous me plaisez, il y a quelque chose en vous qui m'attire et que j'aime bien.

[OtisTheMarsupial]

Où est la bibliothèque?

[lucas9000]

j'aime de grandes fesses et je ne peux pas me trouver

[masse75]

[ QUOTE ]
...and she's at my door asking me to help move a futon. It's not my job, but how can i refuse?
damn fine.

[/ QUOTE ]

Congrats. You're well on your way to being played.

[offTopic]

"J'étais le meilleur dans le comté en 1995. J'ai eu quinze attirails pour des pertes."


(I don't know if pooper is masculine or feminine, though derriere is, apparently masculine (surprising)...I'm just typing stuff into babelfish.)

[gorie]

[ QUOTE ]
Où est la bibliothèque?

[/ QUOTE ]
awesome, after reading the original post that was my first thought. la bibliothèque is #1.

second was "mangez la pomme avec moi" not as cool but these are the only words i remember from 3 years of high school french.

[DavidC]

[ QUOTE ]

"J'étais le meilleur dans le comté en 1995. J'ai eu quinze attirails pour des pertes."


(I don't know if pooper is masculine or feminine, though derriere is, apparently masculine (surprising)...I'm just typing stuff into babelfish.)

[/ QUOTE ]

Okay, I could be wrong, but does:

"J'étais le meilleur dans le comté en 1995."

mean: "I was 'All County' in '95."

?

[bukkrukk]

[ QUOTE ]

Okay, I could be wrong, but does:

"J'étais le meilleur dans le comté en 1995."

mean: "I was 'All County' in '95."

?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah... or something like that.

[bukkrukk]

When you´re done moving futons...

Suce ma bite sal pute! - Suck my dick, you dirty whore.

[offTopic]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

"J'étais le meilleur dans le comté en 1995. J'ai eu quinze attirails pour des pertes."


(I don't know if pooper is masculine or feminine, though derriere is, apparently masculine (surprising)...I'm just typing stuff into babelfish.)

[/ QUOTE ]

Okay, I could be wrong, but does:

"J'étais le meilleur dans le comté en 1995."

mean: "I was 'All County' in '95."

?

[/ QUOTE ]

The above was the result when I entered, "I was the best in the county in 1995. I had fifteen tackles for losses." into babelfish. I didn't think babelfish would be able to interpret "all-county" correctly.

[Blarg]

She's not strong enough to move a futon? Uh...sure.

Sounds to me like she's trying to give you an opening, so to speak. Seriously, anyone can move a futon.

Suggested move? Tell her you love what you've heard about bathing "the French way" -- meaning, pretty much never, just spraying on cologne to cover the stink. And if she's going to be doing any driving on a manual, tell her that cars work the opposite way here -- almost all the gears are for going forward.

[Subfallen]

[ QUOTE ]

Bill Clinton was the f'ing PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA and he still had his intern blow him.

[/ QUOTE ]

[poker-penguin]

[ QUOTE ]
collez-le dans son pooper

[/ QUOTE ]

Glue it in her pooper?

Nice misuse of Babelfish.

[Benal]

French, from France? Be weary of the hairyness /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Raze tu tes jambes? "Do you shave your legs?"

Est tu razee sous les bras? "Are your pits shaved?"

"raze" is pronouced raaaz with the "a" sounding like the "a" in "party".

And dont forget to always roll your "R" in French... I've given up teaching my wife French cause she just can't roll those damn Rs.

[OtisTheMarsupial]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
collez-le dans son pooper

[/ QUOTE ]

Glue it in her pooper?

Nice misuse of Babelfish.

[/ QUOTE ]

ROTFL!
I thought that looked fishy.

[oreogod]

[ QUOTE ]
Unfourtunatly, my business association with her (as the building super) precludes the possibility of an... interaction. *sighs*

[/ QUOTE ]

Wow, that is one chicken-sh*t of an excuse.

People who tend to fumble when confronting women or know they have no chance, usually bring this up as an excuse to not try and bang the hot babe.

Dont be a pussy, my friend, ask her out. The only turn off to some european girls is the bearded snatch. Many of the french have no affinity for the landing strip. (my experience with 2 of the 3 french women Ive been with. German girls, I like much better for this reason. Again, based only on my experience, so this may be a generalization)

[FatMan]

In the words of the Georgia Satellites,"tu jour amour avec mon ami."

[offTopic]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
collez-le dans son pooper

[/ QUOTE ]

Glue it in her pooper?

Nice misuse of Babelfish.

[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/confused.gif I used it to translate "stick it in her pooper" to an internet messageboard...you know, where it doesn't really matter if the translation is correct.

What is the proper use of babelfish?

[STLantny]

Here's how to impress her:
1. go to blockbuster
2. rent some jerry lewis movies
3. mimic everything you have learned from the movies
4. Stick it in her pooper flavin

[DavidC]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
collez-le dans son pooper

[/ QUOTE ]

Glue it in her pooper?

Nice misuse of Babelfish.

[/ QUOTE ]

/images/graemlins/confused.gif I used it to translate "stick it in her pooper" to an internet messageboard...you know, where it doesn't really matter if the translation is correct.

What is the proper use of babelfish?

[/ QUOTE ]

Someone set up us the bomb

(planted the bomb)

[Amid Cent]

[ QUOTE ]
Yeah, and if that doesn't work try "Mocha Chocolata ya ya". They're a sucker for that one.

[/ QUOTE ]

VNH. I just coughed my muffin all over my desk.