If You Could Give Any Advice to Yourself @ 16...

[GrandmaStabone]

Situation:
You can somehow travel back in time to spend 5 minutes with yourself at 16 years old.

Most people seem to wish they could go back through childhood/school with the knowledge/confidence they possess now.

Specifically, what advice would you try to get across - and why do you feel you would have been better served in life by possessing it?

[Yeti]

Be more confident, less geeky, tell more people to fk off, and nail some birds.

[-Skeme-]

Brush your teeth, kid. Good thread, btw.

[jakethebake]

Waste of time. I never listened to advice when I was young.

[-Skeme-]

The Roman Empire was still thriving when you were young.

[wayabvpar]

BUY MICROSOFT STOCK. In 1986, it was still affordable, and hadn't split 500 times.

[M2d]

"There's this new company called Microsoft..." perfect timing for me.

[tbach24]

Don't click on "Other Other Topics"

[-Skeme-]

JINX

[M2d]

you beat me to it. evidently, we're about the same age.

[M2d]

[ QUOTE ]
JINX

[/ QUOTE ]
had I known then about microsoft, I'd buy you a coke today.

[Alobar]

Id tell myself who won all the major sports championships for the next 10 years, and what stocks to invest in /images/graemlins/smile.gif

Anything I could prolly tell myself at 16 that I wished now I could change, myself at 16 wouldnt make that change after a 5 minute convo. So Id tell him to go buy some sklansky/malmuth books and learn poker, to not take AP english my senior year, and to not be a scared little virgin bitch when I get confronted by my french teacher in her nightie, Id say be a man and tap that ass.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
not be a scared little virgin bitch when I get confronted by my french teacher in her nightie, Id say be a man and tap that ass.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is a story we need to hear the rest of.

[Shajen]

Me talking about the 16 yo me's current girl: She'll cheat on you. But that's cool. You'll meet a really hot chick and her easy skank friend. Go ahead and nail the skank friend, but dump her before any drama can start. Then have a relationship with the hot chick. (Wait, this actually happened) /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Around the age of 24, diverisy your stock. Save more, party less. Trust me.

(In 1998 I spent $35k partying. In 2001 I came >.< to losing everything.)

[Tron]

http://www.mtv.com/shared/media/news/images/r/RZA/sq-rza-1102-mtv-ex-jc.jpg

"You gots to diversify yo bonds, nigga."

[Yeti]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
not be a scared little virgin bitch when I get confronted by my french teacher in her nightie, Id say be a man and tap that ass.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is a story we need to hear the rest of.

[/ QUOTE ]

[sexypanda]

Life isn't out to get you, stop being such a pussy.

The measure of a man has nothing to do with whether he's captain of a sports team, how many girls he's hooked up with, or anything else superficial. It has to do with the respect he gives to people and commands from them at the same time. It's understanding responsibility and willingness to take on challenges.

Find what you love doing, whatever that is, and do it. That's the key to happiness, not money or anything else superficial. Chasing money will just lead you to an empty meaningless life.

Confidence comes with finding what you love and succeeding in it, everything else comes after that, including the money, women, etc.

[sexypanda]

Oh and this...

[ QUOTE ]
Don't click on "Other Other Topics"

[/ QUOTE ]

[M2d]

aren't you currently 16?

[Bradyams]

- Don't drive like an idiot you're goin to kill yourself

- In one year you will discover alcohol at a new level. You need to refrain from drinking so much or else you'll kill yourself

- Stop spending your money on useless [censored]. You don't need a $1500 car stereo

[tbach24]

[ QUOTE ]
aren't you currently 16?

[/ QUOTE ]

17 and I just remembered I discovered OOT at 17. I'll start thinking again.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
- Stop spending your money on useless [censored]. You don't need a $1500 car stereo

[/ QUOTE ]

Wow! How much do your pants cost?

[poker-penguin]

I'd probably tell my 16 year old self that nothing is as important as you (I) think it is.

Also that he should get his geeky computer friend and make an online poker site (in 1996 I could have beaten Diksht)

[tbach24]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
aren't you currently 16?

[/ QUOTE ]

17 and I just remembered I discovered OOT at 17. I'll start thinking again.

[/ QUOTE ]

I got it!! Better dieting and more regular exercise.

[Alobar]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
not be a scared little virgin bitch when I get confronted by my french teacher in her nightie, Id say be a man and tap that ass.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is a story we need to hear the rest of.

[/ QUOTE ]

I had a huge thing for my french teacher in high school. She was in her mid 30s, but still really attractive. I took her french class all 3 years in HS. I was her favorite student. She used to let me out of class to go run errands for her. She even used to give me off campus passes so I could go do stuff for her. When I was a senior I started mowing her lawn and doing yard work for her (upon her request).

Right after I graduated she asked me if I still wanted to run errands for her. So I used to go over to her house and shed give me a grocery list and crap like that. It was the 3rd time I did that for her, I came back from the store and she was in her room sitting on her bed in her nightgown. She asked if I wanted to stay awhile and talk. Back then, I had practically zero experience with women, wasnt very confident and really akward. I used to whack off to this lady like every other day, actually being confronted with the possibility that I fantasized about wasnt something I was prepared for. I totally choked. I stammered some excuse on why I had to leave, and fumbled my way out the door. It was about a week later I got really sick (was sick for almost a year) so I couldnt mow her lawn anymore or run errands for her, so I missed getting a second chance at not being a giant pussy. She called me on the phone a few times while I was sick to see how I was doing, and she sent a card, but I never really saw her again.

[Los Feliz Slim]

That makes me sad.

[-Skeme-]

Haha, damn, she had you buying her food and mowing her lawn and [censored]. That's great. You're a real workhorse, Alo.

You should call her up.

[chaas4747]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
not be a scared little virgin bitch when I get confronted by my french teacher in her nightie, Id say be a man and tap that ass.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is a story we need to hear the rest of.

[/ QUOTE ]

I had a huge thing for my french teacher in high school. She was in her mid 30s, but still really attractive. I took her french class all 3 years in HS. I was her favorite student. She used to let me out of class to go run errands for her. She even used to give me off campus passes so I could go do stuff for her. When I was a senior I started mowing her lawn and doing yard work for her (upon her request).

Right after I graduated she asked me if I still wanted to run errands for her. So I used to go over to her house and shed give me a grocery list and crap like that. It was the 3rd time I did that for her, I came back from the store and she was in her room sitting on her bed in her nightgown. She asked if I wanted to stay awhile and talk. Back then, I had practically zero experience with women, wasnt very confident and really akward. I used to whack off to this lady like every other day, actually being confronted with the possibility that I fantasized about wasnt something I was prepared for. I totally choked. I stammered some excuse on why I had to leave, and fumbled my way out the door. It was about a week later I got really sick (was sick for almost a year) so I couldnt mow her lawn anymore or run errands for her, so I missed getting a second chance at not being a giant pussy. She called me on the phone a few times while I was sick to see how I was doing, and she sent a card, but I never really saw her again.

[/ QUOTE ]

This may be the sadest story I have ever heard. /images/graemlins/frown.gif

[wacki]

why were you sick?

Also, give her a call. Even if you don't hook up it will make her feel good letting her know how nervous you got.

[TStoneMBD]

id tell myself:

to start reading twoplustwo like i do now

dont cut corners with money. spend it on things that will pay dividends in the future.

find some motivation.

move out of the house as fast as you can afford it.

dont you dare work that job your parents have been telling you that you need to get.

read more.

college isnt as bad as you think it is. but dont go right into college once you get out of highschool, take some time off first. (now i wouldnt go to college because i dont need to and it wouldnt help my 20 year plan.)

try to figure out exactly what goals you want to accomplish in your life, but make sure that they are goals that you will love to accomplish and goals that make you happy during the long stretches of hard work. you dont want to turn into one of those people who never know where they are headed.

stop breaking off friendships like a little bitch when you get bored. you never make stable ties with close friends and youll regret that later on. good friends are hard to come by.

try to get out into the community more and build foundations with people. youve always been someone who walks through life by himself as a pioneer, and still will be when youre 20 (im 20 now), but this will make you miserable if you dont find a way to change that.

try to find happiness in small things. never lose that passion youve had for women and the way youve cared for your girlfriends. you dont want to turn into that guy who treats women disposably even though you will.

editted to add:

eat better and exercise regularly.

dont listen to the advice of people who you dont trust. you know better and are better off without it.

compliment people more, i mean at least sometimes.

[[censored]]

1. You are going to meet this girl when you are 20 and in the Army, avoid her she is nothing but trouble and will cause you alot of pain for many yesars

2. Avoid using credit, life is muxh easier without it

3. Let's make a financial plan now, invest every dime you make while in the Army

4. The history of the tech bubble

5. Start working out

[B Dids]

"Hey dumbass, when she says 'do you want to go back to my place' she doesn't mean to just talk and [censored]".

[Alobar]

[ QUOTE ]
why were you sick?

Also, give her a call. Even if you don't hook up it will make her feel good letting her know how nervous you got.

[/ QUOTE ]

The me getting sick thing is a looong story im not gunna get into,

As for calling her, I used to think about doing it alot back when I was like 22. I went by her house one time when I was home for the summer in college, with the intention of saying hello (dunno if I actually would have done it), but it was pretty obvious they didnt live there anymore. It wouldnt have been hard to find her number or addy tho as it was a pretty small town, but I never did.

I think I was always just kinda scared she wouldnt remember who I was, which I know is pretty dumb. And in college I gained alot of experience so I dunno if it would have even been the same, isntead of like this super fantasy come true, it would have been just having sex with a middle aged woman, and I think I didnt want to ruin the memory. That and its not like she said "why dont you come in here and [censored] my brains out", so who knows, maybe she just got up from a nap or something, and I'd look like a huge douche for implying otherwise. Tho looking back with what I know now, I'ts pretty obvious that if I wasnt so scared id have a whole different story to tell.

[wacki]

Dude, she meant a lot to you and you obviously meant something to her. When people get old they also get lonely. Give her a call and go out for coffee as old friends. Tell her you have a girlfriend if you don't want to feel too uncomfortable.

Just do it, I think it will do both of you some good.

[jcx]

What's the point? My 16 year old self would have probably told me to F off.

[Blarg]

Don't leave home before you graduate, and don't believe anything your folks say about money.

I would have been better served because I was on the three year graduation plan at home, and based on financial assurances from my folks they instantly went back on as soon as I left home, that turned into, shall we say, a substantially longer time frame that was peppered with quite a hefty share of every kind of difficulty and absurdity.

My life would have been oriented completely differently if my folks had just been straight with me up front, and my schooling, at least, would have been ridiculously cheap and easy, with tremendously good results(I was in the honors program at the time, taking more honors courses than anyone in the entire university). As it was, finishing up turned out to be a very rough experience, with grades that were quite good but not at the outstanding level I was producing formerly.

I also would have had more time to deeply develop what to that point had been the most enjoyable thing and greatest accomplishment -- my martial arts -- under an ideal instructor who was very open and giving. I think it was very clear to both of us that he felt he was losing something hard to replace when I could no longer be his student since I left the state to continue college elsewhere, and that I knew I was losing something precious I might actually never replace.

I'd tell myself to believe what I saw, not what I hoped or was told or reassured, and to watch my foundation and strengthen it, because I was on a much thinner edge than I ever imagined.

[spamuell]

Trying to use humour to soften the blow of a breakup is not a good idea. In particular, avoid the phrase, "welcome to dumpsville, population: you." <font color="white"> POTD</font>

[offTopic]

[ QUOTE ]
It was the 3rd time I did that for her, I came back from the store and she was in her room sitting on her bed in her nightgown. She asked if I wanted to stay awhile and talk.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ms. Krabappel!

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y150/offTopic2p2/edna2.jpg

[PoBoy321]

1) I would tell myself to avoid every bitchy girl I've ever known, get involved with all the really nice, cute girls I've never done anything with, and to make sure that I don't screw up that one time I almost hooked up with a black chick.

2) DERB

3) Don't stop working out when you go to college.

EDIT:
4) Drinking is the best bad thing you'll ever do.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
I had a huge thing for my french teacher in high school. She was in her mid 30s, but still really attractive. I took her french class all 3 years in HS. I was her favorite student. She used to let me out of class to go run errands for her. She even used to give me off campus passes so I could go do stuff for her. When I was a senior I started mowing her lawn and doing yard work for her (upon her request).

Right after I graduated she asked me if I still wanted to run errands for her. So I used to go over to her house and shed give me a grocery list and crap like that. It was the 3rd time I did that for her, I came back from the store and she was in her room sitting on her bed in her nightgown. She asked if I wanted to stay awhile and talk. Back then, I had practically zero experience with women, wasnt very confident and really akward. I used to whack off to this lady like every other day, actually being confronted with the possibility that I fantasized about wasnt something I was prepared for. I totally choked. I stammered some excuse on why I had to leave, and fumbled my way out the door. It was about a week later I got really sick (was sick for almost a year) so I couldnt mow her lawn anymore or run errands for her, so I missed getting a second chance at not being a giant pussy. She called me on the phone a few times while I was sick to see how I was doing, and she sent a card, but I never really saw her again.

[/ QUOTE ]

That's a sad story. I think you should get drunk and then call her.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
I also would have had more time to deeply develop what to that point had been the most enjoyable thing and greatest accomplishment -- my martial arts -- under an ideal instructor who was very open and giving. I think it was very clear to both of us that he felt he was losing something hard to replace when I could no longer be his student since I left the state to continue college elsewhere, and that I knew I was losing something precious I might actually never replace.

[/ QUOTE ]

Alobar, Blarg....How many of you guys had these little things with teachers anyway? /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[ThaSaltCracka]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I also would have had more time to deeply develop what to that point had been the most enjoyable thing and greatest accomplishment -- my martial arts -- under an ideal instructor who was very open and giving. I think it was very clear to both of us that he felt he was losing something hard to replace when I could no longer be his student since I left the state to continue college elsewhere, and that I knew I was losing something precious I might actually never replace.

[/ QUOTE ]

Alobar, Blarg....How many of you guys had these little things with teachers anyway? /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[/ QUOTE ]LMAO, NH.

[FourKing Hell]

lmao

[1800GAMBLER]

/images/graemlins/frown.gif

[Blarg]

Hahah! No, not THAT kind of teacher thing!

There are some horizons -- and sphinctres -- that I'm glad never got broadened.

[mmbt0ne]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">En réponse à:</font><hr />
(In 1998 I spent $35k partying. In 2001 I came &gt;.&lt; to losing everything.)

[/ QUOTE ]

Find Shajen in 2 years, and hang out with him.

[zephed]

Convince my younger self that girls I liked would do me. Stop being such a timid pussy, and get in their pants. It was true, and I see it now.

Avoid credit.

Don't skip classes in college.

Don't sell your bug.

[AZK]

what's up with the POTD at the end of your response?

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
what's up with the POTD at the end of your response?

[/ QUOTE ]
Check back tomorrow.

[tbach24]

[ QUOTE ]
what's up with the POTD at the end of your response?

[/ QUOTE ]

link (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&amp;Number=2679598&amp;page=1&amp;view=colla psed&amp;sb=5&amp;o=14&amp;fpart=1)

[Rob Blackburn]

I think my list could be about 10 pages long, the more important ones....

Don't drink and drive ever, but most importantly don't do in on July 4th of 1993. High school is not as fun when you don't have a license anymore.

In 1996 one of your good friends will ask you to go with him to Cali to program for a startup, go and you will never have to work again.

If you do start that music importing business, sellout before the UPS strike in 97

Study harder in school.

And you can never get laid enough, so get laid more.

[StevieG]

Al Steiner preaches the wisdom (http://storiesonline.net/library/st_get.php?id=30059&amp;c=1372)

[touchfaith]

I would go back and tell myself....

<font color="red"> WEAR A RUBBER! </font>

I win.

Great thread

[BadBoyBenny]

Wacki is speaking the truth here. Find her and make contact. This is a terrible loose end from your past. Even if she is middle aged now, she sounds exciting... You never know what kind of things would result.

[Guy Incognito]

Buy some weights, stock up on protein, and stop being horribly skinny.

Don't go to an overpriced college that you can't afford without going deeply into debt. State schools will be free in 2 years.

High school social problems only become marginally less significant in college and the real world. Deal with them now.

[wonderwes]

Sometimes I really wish I had this option

- Go to a different college than I did choose
- Invest in all the tech stocks
- Tell myself to learn how to play cards at 16 instead of starting at 21
- Get myself off all soft drinks
- Get in better shape

[TheDachshund]

27 Year old me: Listen up man, I have some important stuff you gotta hear.
16 Year old me: Holy [censored]!! Is that….it can’t be…….noooooooo way.
27 Year old me: Yea, its me. Ok heres the deal…there will be this company called……hey what are you doing…are you even listing to me? this is important.
16 Year old me: Hit this, just got it this afternoon.
27 Year old me: DUDE LISTEN UP, what I am about to tell you will change both our lives……….
16 Year old me: Quit being such a pussy, man wtf happened to us we used to be so cool and you fuct it up…….just hit it, trust me.
27 year old me: ……………..*cough*…………*hack*……….*cough*…………


16 Year old me: hahahahahaha told ya you would like it.
27 Year old me: …….thats some….killer [censored] dude………..
16 Year old me So what did you come here to tell me about?
27 Year old me: uhhhhhhhhhhhh…… I forget man….roll another one.


27 year old me:……so then after 7 years of college we get married, you get a job as an……
16 Year old me: Dude, check it out…..look……
27 Year old me: Holy [censored]!! Is that….it can’t be…….noooooooo way.

35 Year old me: *sigh* You both disappoint me.

[mason55]

Don't get addicted to porn, you'll lose your girlfriend and get your ass kicked by the swim team.

[AZK]

brilliant.

[PokerFink]

Alobar, I'm so sorry for you. I understand, I would have choked in the exact same way. You should call her, you will both get a laugh talking about it now.

Also, I can't stop thinking about the movie The Graduate now.

[poker-penguin]

[ QUOTE ]
Don't get addicted to porn, you'll lose your girlfriend and get your ass kicked by the swim team.

[/ QUOTE ]

POTD

[blatz]

Forget everything you've been told. Drink more, chase ladies, run away from home for no better reason than adventure. Never be ashamed or embarassed, humiliate yourself, if you think it would be amusing. You won't care about the opinions of these boneheads you go to school with once you see the world outside of your small town.

If I got all of this out of my system by the time I was 18, I probably would not still acting out like this 12 years later, when I should know better.

Not that I'm complaining, just wonder how different I'd be.

[AsiaKurosawa]

Don't have sex with him/her if *you* don't want to. It's okay if you do though, let go of the guilt (no matter what mom says).

Drop the "I'm afraid of math" bullsh!t, stop cowering behind things you are already good at.

Stop hanging out with the kids doing speed in the darkroom during 1st period photo.

Stop settling.

You won't marry or be with any guy/gal from high school. Or, at least-- you shouldn't. You'll meet much more stimulating and satisfying people (in terms of long term relationships) once you get to college. That being said, be a kid and just have some fun.

Your sister will grow up and be more straightedge than you.

Don't let G use the bong in your car. He'll spill it all on the backseat. That being said, stop smoking cloves in your car-- it smells like ham in there now.

Get a freaking oil change once in a while! Please!!

Don't let C move in with you.

Science will be the coolest thing you'll never get once you graduate-- stop being a wuss and buckle down. You don't really need to play more tetris.

PLUR is bullsh!t. Just go for the speakerhumping and human contact and thrill of mud travelling and caked up to your thighs in toobig pantlegs.

[SmileyEH]

I would just tell him that its all going to be ok.

-SmileyEH

[Vavavoom]

In no particular order.....I would have told me...:

* Never ever turn down s*x....U will regret it in the future......
* Finish your degree......
* Work hard first time round at school so u don't have to go back a year....
* Take your driving test @ 17 not 4 years later....
* Walk to the train station on October 2nd 2004, don't drive there....
* DO NOT sleep with any girls in gran Canaria in April 2003..(to avoid any unnecessary tests down the sexual health clinic and subsequent treatments...)

Although, ultimately...I'm happy with everything I have done...Not to be cliched - But "Everything happens for a reason"...so I wouldn't change anything.....apart from maybe the occasional winning lottery ticket thrown in for good measure......

[Mike Cuneo]

Fold PF

[tworooks]

When unlocking the bathroom door at football practice, start using the keys on the right instead of the keys on the left.

[IronDragon1]

Quit being a bitch and come on

[mslif]

Don't believe what guys say.. They just want to get into your pants!

[PokerBob]

Bang Sarah B. and Kelly F., regardless of how annoying they were in high school.

[PokerBob]

[ QUOTE ]
I used to whack off to this lady like every other day,

[/ QUOTE ]

IF this is the actual frequency, then you were not a normal kid.

[Popinjay]

Stop watching TV, playing video games, and wasting time in general. Think more, read more, do more.

[Lawrence Ng]

Alobar..... /images/graemlins/frown.gif

[Lawrence Ng]

[ QUOTE ]
don't believe anything your folks say about money.


[/ QUOTE ]

Exactly. This almost royally [censored] me over.

Lawrence

[imported_CaseClosed326]

Hey kid, dump her, like now. I know you just started going out, but it all goes down from here.

Oh yeah start drinking with your friends you pussy.

[sexdrugsmoney]

SIIHP.

[cpitt398]

bang every chick you possibly can for the next 5 years.

[MarkL444]

[ QUOTE ]
Stop watching TV, playing video games, and wasting time in general. Think more, read more, do more.

[/ QUOTE ]

this is exactly what i would say. i would also make sure i got started on poker so that i would be way better by now. /images/graemlins/cool.gif

[Duke]

Skip senior year and start college at USC. It's not a good school, but nobody cares. You'll be in and out before you know it.

Study physics, since that's what you like. Not CS, since you know that already.

You're going to meet this girl when you're 21. Run. Fast. Do not look back.

Other than a list of tech stocks to buy, or a list of long shots in horse races, or the year the Angels won the World series, or to take a piece of Greg Raymer in 2004, or other things for financial gain, I think that's about it.

~D

[siccjay]

Be confident with chicks.

There a billion ways to get rich off the internet. Look for them now.

Pay attention when driving moms car 5 days after you get your license.

If you are going to go to college FINISH IT, but you don't really need it.

[turnipmonster]

quit worrying so much about things you can't control and focus on things you can.

work hard at things you love, and direction will follow. it's important to work hard at things you're not good at, but remember to use the things you are good at.

have goals, but don't get too caught up in them, they will change and aren't always what they seem anyways.

--turnipmonster

[VBM]

i would tell myself to raise hell about Sept 11 b4 it happened.

[samjjones]

Call out sick from work on September 11, 2001.

[amoeba]

that sounds about right.

[jdoe]

Advertising and marketing make us work jobs we don't like to buy things we don't need
to impress people that do not matter.