Bar Trip Report... [Archive] - Two Plus Two Older Archives

jakethebake

06-18-2005, 02:07 PM

So I'm still hung over from the bar last night, and it was crazy. I went to a bar by my house after busting out of a MTT at the casino last night. The place was packed but there was one barstool open that just ahppened to be right next to five absolutely smoking hot chicas, maybe 21-23 years old. Actually I guess only 4 of them were smoking hot, one was kinda meh.

So I sit down and it's pretty obvious they're already drunk. They were just getting ready to do a round of blowjobs off the bar. This one latin girl had huge tits with very little attempt to really cover them and she ended up with er drink spilling down her cleavage. So the other girl big-titted blonde starts licking it off.

There was one girl that didn't like blow jobs so she just gets a rock glass full of whipped cream and starts eating it in this really slutty-looking way. Then she licks out some and her friend sucks it off her tongue.

They're all kinda giggling, and it's obvious they're just hot drunk college girls, not really lesbos or anything.
Anyway, I got a beer and I'm just sitting there watching. Whipped cream girl's name was Danielle and she started talking to me a little bit. Pretty cool girl.

Anyway, one of them has some stuff called lip venom. It's some kinda lip gloss that's supposed to make lips fuller by enlarging the blood vessels or something. So one of them gets the brilliant drunken idea that this would feel pretty good on their nipples. Yes, there was exposed nipplage as they applied it there at the bar. So they're all giggling about how it tingles and their nipples are all hard.

Then one of them gets the even more rilliant idea that this stuf would feel really good downstairs. So they all run to the bathroom. they come back a few minutes later giggling. They sit down and start squirming around in their chairs, and talking about how good it feels.

But then it starts to burn and they're all jumping up and down yelling. So I ask the bartender for a pitcher of ice and they all start rubbing it all over each other. More exposed nipplage, no clear viewage downstairs, just glances.

Anyway this whole time I'm just laughing and watching. They knew I was watching and are just teasing the hell out of me. One girl hopped on my lap and squirmed around at one point. One girl had me drop a handfull of ice down her pants...lol.

Well those were the highlights. I left at like 3 am and two of them were still there. The others went home. No I didn't put it in anyone's pooper. No I didn't ask for phone numbers. Damn marriage social conventions. Who thought up this whole monogamy thing anyway?

Oh well, all in all a pretty fun night.

Malachii

06-18-2005, 06:08 PM

Eh. Sucks that you're married /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

tbach24

06-18-2005, 06:09 PM

How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

ThaSaltCracka

06-18-2005, 06:11 PM

sounds like a fun night. To bad you are an old fart.

ThaSaltCracka

06-18-2005, 06:12 PM

[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

pwned.

2+2 wannabe

06-18-2005, 06:13 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

pwned.

[/ QUOTE ]

did you say pwned to your own joke?

ThaSaltCracka

06-18-2005, 06:13 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

pwned.

[/ QUOTE ]

did you say pwned to your own joke?

[/ QUOTE ]yes. I have earned that honor.

tbach24

06-18-2005, 06:14 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

[/ QUOTE ]

No I mean I could be an old man and go and hit on the chicks and get laid by 4 hotties and a meh one and it technically wouldn't be Jake because it was me.

2+2 wannabe

06-18-2005, 06:15 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

pwned.

[/ QUOTE ]

did you say pwned to your own joke?

[/ QUOTE ]yes. I have earned that honor.

[/ QUOTE ]

ok sir

ThaSaltCracka

06-18-2005, 06:17 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

[/ QUOTE ]

No I mean I could be an old man and go and hit on the chicks and get laid by 4 hotties and a meh one and it technically wouldn't be Jake because it was me.

[/ QUOTE ]wtf.

tbach24

06-18-2005, 06:19 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

[/ QUOTE ]

No I mean I could be an old man and go and hit on the chicks and get laid by 4 hotties and a meh one and it technically wouldn't be Jake because it was me.

[/ QUOTE ]wtf.

[/ QUOTE ]

Was I not concise enough or is it an odd idea?

ThaSaltCracka

06-18-2005, 06:21 PM

its an odd idea.

Brainwalter

06-18-2005, 06:21 PM

jakethebake

06-18-2005, 06:28 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

[/ QUOTE ]

No I mean I could be an old man and go and hit on the chicks and get laid by 4 hotties and a meh one and it technically wouldn't be Jake because it was me.

[/ QUOTE ]

Jake wouldn't be cheating, but you would.

[/ QUOTE ]

Geez. One of my best bar trips in years and you guys turn it into a meaning of self discussion. /images/graemlins/mad.gif

kerssens

06-18-2005, 06:31 PM

A story like this lets me know dreams CAN come true! /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Brainwalter

06-18-2005, 06:35 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
How about you and I switch lives when you're about to go to the bar.

[/ QUOTE ]soo...that would mean you couldn't get into said bar.

[/ QUOTE ]

No I mean I could be an old man and go and hit on the chicks and get laid by 4 hotties and a meh one and it technically wouldn't be Jake because it was me.

[/ QUOTE ]

Jake wouldn't be cheating, but you would.

[/ QUOTE ]

Geez. One of my best bar trips in years and you guys turn it into a meaning of self discussion. /images/graemlins/mad.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Sorry. Good story, needed a better ending. Lol @ your avatar though.

fluorescenthippo

06-18-2005, 06:44 PM

this is a very good story

CardSharpCook

06-18-2005, 06:48 PM

Submit to Penthouse, but work on the ending.

raisethatmofo

06-18-2005, 07:31 PM

CardSharpCook

06-18-2005, 08:15 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I know all of you are saying that you'd enjoy this and "wow what a wonderful night" and [censored]. But I wouldn't enjoy this. I'm a heterosexual guy but damn that's torture. I wouldn't enjoy this for the same reason I don't like strip clubs. You go there and are literally tortured for a few hours and you have to get yourself off later. Where's the enjoyment in that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

This is why we need to work on the ending. Also, undeniable animal attraction is a really nice feeling. It makes you feel ALIVE and like a man. Not a big fan of strip clubs either, but I love it when sexy shti like this happens in the world around me. I can't help but crack a really huge smile.

CSC

oreogod

06-18-2005, 10:49 PM

http://www.forumspile.com/Hijack-Duke_Nukem_Mission.jpg

HopeydaFish

06-18-2005, 10:59 PM

In situations like these, it is important to go all-in on the meh one. It reduces variance, plus she'll let you stick it in her pooper.

bosoxfan

06-19-2005, 12:00 AM

I'm confused. Is this the old bar or the new bar? Did you give up on the new bar? You need to be more specific.

If someone else had written this yours would have been the first reply saying this thread is worthless without pics.

Jakesta

06-19-2005, 12:10 AM

Jake, stop making stories up.

ThaSaltCracka

06-19-2005, 05:38 AM

jakethebake

06-19-2005, 10:49 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I'm confused. Is this the old bar or the new bar? Did you give up on the new bar? You need to be more specific.

[/ QUOTE ]
Different bar. This one is by the house. The other is near work.

[ QUOTE ]
If someone else had written this yours would have been the first reply saying this thread is worthless without pics.

[/ QUOTE ]
Unfortunately I didn't have a camera with me, although one of them did. If I ever see them there again, I'll ask about the pics..especially since there was a pretty hot one of one of the girls on my lap.

jakethebake

06-19-2005, 10:50 AM

[ QUOTE ]
Jake, stop making stories up.

[/ QUOTE ]

Does that sound like a story somneone could make up?

jakethebake

06-19-2005, 10:58 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I know all of you are saying that you'd enjoy this and "wow what a wonderful night" and [censored]. But I wouldn't enjoy this. I'm a heterosexual guy but damn that's torture. I wouldn't enjoy this for the same reason I don't like strip clubs. You go there and are literally tortured for a few hours and you have to get yourself off later. Where's the enjoyment in that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

It was moslty about it just being so funny. These girls were hilarious. Also, if you have no appreciation for a sexy girl w/o being able to put it in her pooper i feel sorry for you. You're missing out.

B00T

06-20-2005, 01:30 AM

Good story.

Lip Venom sucks. My gf wears it thinking it really does something. It is a craptacular product. She also bought one from Sephora, a store brand I think which did a little puffing but it still was not worth the $40 that it costs.

It definitely isnt worth her asking you ever 5 minutes, "how bout now?" when she tries something new.

Don't encourage your significant others to purchase this crap.

jakethebake

06-20-2005, 08:13 AM

[ QUOTE ]
Sorry. Good story, needed a better ending.

[/ QUOTE ]

Should I have made something up?