Mike Tyson versus...

[SomethingClever]

Name a person, and the following poster will debate whether or not that person could beat Mike Tyson in a boxing match.

I'll start.

Ben Wallace. 6'9", 240.

http://graphics.jsonline.com/graphics/sports/buck/img/jun04/ben613.jpg

[JDErickson]

http://images.art.com/images/PRODUCTS/large/10042000/10042164.jpg

[stankybank]

Tyson wins.

How about Tyson vs. Him (http://www.mmareview.com/mmareview-profile-bob_sapp.htm)

[SomethingClever]

[ QUOTE ]
Tyson wins.

How about Tyson vs. Him (http://www.mmareview.com/mmareview-profile-bob_sapp.htm)

[/ QUOTE ]

Sapp would crush Tyson.

However, I think Big Ben has a chance too. How will Tyson even reach his face?

Pee Wee versus Tyson? Eh... pick 'em.

[1p0kerb0y]

Mike loses in the fourth. What about him? (http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:xj0cd1w3cPsJ:www.poker-images.com/images/newimages/BB01299.jpg)

[tbach24]

Big Ben would destroy Tyson. Wallace is a BEAST

[CallMeIshmael]

Ditka!!!

http://hollandsentinel.com/images/010600/ditka.jpg

[The Stranger]

Mary-Kate Olson

http://www.gmx.net/images/302/676302,h=238,pd=2,w=179.jpg

[Phoenix1010]

The Olsens purge all over Tyson's face, but he remains unfazed. He bites Mary Kate's head off, waits ten years for Ashley to have children, and then eats her kids.

How about Mike versus Detective John Kimble?

http://img122.echo.cx/img122/7568/arnoldyell0mf.jpg (http://www.imageshack.us)

[A_C_Slater]

[ QUOTE ]
Ditka!!!

http://hollandsentinel.com/images/010600/ditka.jpg

[/ QUOTE ]


Alright. Dikta versus a hurricane, who wins?

[Sponger15SB]

[ QUOTE ]
Alright. Dikta versus a hurricane, who wins?

[/ QUOTE ]

Hold on, Hold on, Hold on. The name of the Hurricane is Hurricane Ditka.

[Sponger15SB]

[ QUOTE ]
Big Ben would destroy Tyson. Wallace is a BEAST

[/ QUOTE ]

Uh, no. Tyson would stomp him so hard.

Anyone without a background in some form of fighting would get murdered no matter how big they are.

[The Stranger]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Big Ben would destroy Tyson. Wallace is a BEAST

[/ QUOTE ]

Uh, no. Tyson would stomp him so hard.

Anyone without a background in some form of fighting would get murdered no matter how big they are.

[/ QUOTE ]

TBach says so much ignorant crap that I finally just put him on ignore. I'm not a member of the "cool people" list, but somebody might want to recommend TBag to the group.

[Alobar]

Tyson vs. ernie reyes jr

[CallMeIshmael]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Alright. Dikta versus a hurricane, who wins?

[/ QUOTE ]

Hold on, Hold on, Hold on. The name of the Hurricane is Hurricane Ditka.


[/ QUOTE ]


Anybody have any predictions on Da Bears game this weekend?

[The Stranger]

A fern.

http://www.ct-botanical-society.org/ferns/fernpics/osmundacinn.jpg

[Sponger15SB]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Alright. Dikta versus a hurricane, who wins?

[/ QUOTE ]

Hold on, Hold on, Hold on. The name of the Hurricane is Hurricane Ditka.


[/ QUOTE ]

Anybody have any predictions on Da Bears game this weekend?

[/ QUOTE ]

Bears. 79-0. Da bears defense is like a wall. You can't go through it.

[SomethingClever]

[ QUOTE ]
Anyone without a background in some form of fighting would get murdered no matter how big they are.

[/ QUOTE ]

No. At a certain point, size and strength (not to mention general athletic skills. It's not like Wallace would be defenseless in the ring) will outweigh fighting skills. Let's say it's not boxing, it's UFC. Does this change your opinion at all?

Or how about Shaq? As long as the ref didn't allow Tyson to use Shaq's nuts as a speed bag, it's not even close. Shaq wins.

[tbach24]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Big Ben would destroy Tyson. Wallace is a BEAST

[/ QUOTE ]

Uh, no. Tyson would stomp him so hard.

Anyone without a background in some form of fighting would get murdered no matter how big they are.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wallace has a HUGE reach, is very strong and very quick. I'm pretty sure that these three things are very important in boxing.

[SpearsBritney]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Big Ben would destroy Tyson. Wallace is a BEAST

[/ QUOTE ]

Uh, no. Tyson would stomp him so hard.

Anyone without a background in some form of fighting would get murdered no matter how big they are.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wallace has a HUGE reach, is very strong and very quick. I'm pretty sure that these three things are very important in boxing.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes, but so is being a boxer

[tbach24]

Neither of them are boxers anymore.

[SpearsBritney]

saw that one coming

[touchfaith]

"I was just trying to think of the most harmless thing I could think of..."

http://i14.ebayimg.com/01/i/04/38/cd/af_1_b.JPG

Stay Puff in a landslide...

[Phoenix1010]

This is just silly. A trained fighter has an absolutely enormous advantage over any untrained schmuck, no matter how big they happen to be. Do you realize that fighters train for years learning proper footwork, proper timing, proper defense, and proper punch form, among a multitude of other details? Do you realize how imperative it is to have a grasp of those skills if you're going to have any kind of chance to be effective in the ring? The difference in size, strength, and endurance would have to be incredibly large to make up for the difference in skill between a trained veteran fighter and complete noob basketball player. That is not the case with Tyson and any NBA player.

[SomethingClever]

[ QUOTE ]
Do you realize that fighters train for years learning proper footwork, proper timing, proper defense, and proper punch form, among a multitude of other details?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes. But do you realize how washed-up and undersized Tyson is?

[SpearsBritney]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Do you realize that fighters train for years learning proper footwork, proper timing, proper defense, and proper punch form, among a multitude of other details?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes. But do you realize how washed-up and undersized Tyson is?

[/ QUOTE ]

Doesn't matter. He'll definately retain MORE than enough to beat a basketball player. No matter how big.

[SomethingClever]

Michael Clarke Duncan. 6'5", 300 lbs.

http://members.aol.com/aleong1631/greenmile2.jpg

[SpearsBritney]

[ QUOTE ]
Michael Clarke Duncan. 6'5", 300 lbs.



[/ QUOTE ]

Yes, he'll make quite a "thud".

[touchfaith]

Hmm, lets see...

Tyson, trained street punk
Basketball player, a fit street punk

It could be close...Is there any mother insulting involved?

[SpearsBritney]

[ QUOTE ]


It could be close...Is there any mother insulting involved?

[/ QUOTE ]

No, children eating's as far as it will go. And no, it wont be close.

[Voltron87]

wont any nonboxer have almost zero chance actually landing a punch on tyson?

[SomethingClever]

[ QUOTE ]
wont any nonboxer have almost zero chance actually landing a punch on tyson?

[/ QUOTE ]

I really can't believe how one-sided this is.

Did anyone else notice that Tyson lost to Kevin McFreakingBride last night?

He can barely be called a boxer.

[SpearsBritney]

[ QUOTE ]
wont any nonboxer have almost zero chance actually landing a punch on tyson?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes, it's very hard to throw punches in an unconscious state.

[SpearsBritney]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
wont any nonboxer have almost zero chance actually landing a punch on tyson?

[/ QUOTE ]

I really can't believe how one-sided this is.

Did anyone else notice that Tyson lost to Kevin McFreakingBride last night?

He can barely be called a boxer.

[/ QUOTE ]

Kevin McFreakingBride >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> BasketFreakingBall Player

[The Stranger]

okay. how about Mary-Kate, Pee-Wee and the fern versus Tyson in a handicap match.

[woodguy]

Stay Puff in 7

http://www.big-freaky-sean.ws/mt/images/mouse.jpg




Regards,
Woodguiy

[The Stranger]

is that Master Splinter?

[SomethingClever]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
wont any nonboxer have almost zero chance actually landing a punch on tyson?

[/ QUOTE ]

I really can't believe how one-sided this is.

Did anyone else notice that Tyson lost to Kevin McFreakingBride last night?

He can barely be called a boxer.

[/ QUOTE ]

Kevin McFreakingBride >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> BasketFreakingBall Player

[/ QUOTE ]

KMFB recently lost to a guy who went 1-15 in his last 16 fights. The 1 win was against KMFB.

[woodguy]

[ QUOTE ]
is that Master Splinter?

[/ QUOTE ]

Live and in the flesh.

[Diplomat]

There are some details that need to be sorted out first though. For example, are they allowed to kick? Bite? Head-butt?

Nevermind, Tyson is good at most of those anyway. /images/graemlins/wink.gif

Seriously though, the rules of the match change everything.

-Diplomat

[SpearsBritney]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
wont any nonboxer have almost zero chance actually landing a punch on tyson?

[/ QUOTE ]

I really can't believe how one-sided this is.

Did anyone else notice that Tyson lost to Kevin McFreakingBride last night?

He can barely be called a boxer.

[/ QUOTE ]

Kevin McFreakingBride >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> BasketFreakingBall Player

[/ QUOTE ]

KMFB recently lost to a guy who went 1-15 in his last 16 fights. The 1 win was against KMFB.

[/ QUOTE ]

Regardless, he is a trained boxer. To say that an untrained fighter would stand a chance at beating a former world champion is like saying a fish is just as likely to win as a pro because they can both sit down at a table. The subtle advantages are beneath the surface. (And in the end, not so subtle)

[beckham9]

I just want everyone who thinks big ben would have a chance to think of the typical NBA fight.....i mean at least 90% of all punches thrown do not come anywhere near....they just always seem kinda pussy to me.
Only exception of course is artest going into stands, but the guy he was "throwing haymakers at" (they always used that saying right after the fight) was about a foot and 60 pounds lighter than him, so of course he beat his ass.

[touchfaith]

Whens the last time Mike got hit in the face with bare knuckles?

[Russ McGinley]

... The 2+2 Forums

http://img13.echo.cx/img13/2654/2plus21ew.jpg

[M2d]

http://planetwill.jt.org/media/video/98-12-12-brasky.jpg
To Bill Brasky!!

[CallMeIshmael]

I havent read the entire thread. But, it appears that people *actually* believe that non-boxer's could take on tyson.

You guys have to be, in some way, joking.

[ggbman]

In all seriousness, and i know he lost to McBride, but no untrained boxer would beat him in a boxing match. In, a brawl, Big Ben might have a chance.

[steaknshake925]

[ QUOTE ]
This is just silly. A trained fighter has an absolutely enormous advantage over any untrained schmuck, no matter how big they happen to be. Do you realize that fighters train for years learning proper footwork, proper timing, proper defense, and proper punch form, among a multitude of other details? Do you realize how imperative it is to have a grasp of those skills if you're going to have any kind of chance to be effective in the ring? The difference in size, strength, and endurance would have to be incredibly large to make up for the difference in skill between a trained veteran fighter and complete noob basketball player. That is not the case with Tyson and any NBA player.

[/ QUOTE ]

exactly. i cant believe people actually think ben wallace will have a chance against Tyson. tyson is a professional fighter. just because big ben is big and muscular and athletic doesnt mean he can fight. its like saying an olympic high-jumper champion can come in and beat tracy mcgrady one on one. its just not realistic.

[tbach24]

Give Wallace adequate time and I think he'd do it.

Kevin McBride is slow and stupid and beat Tyson.

Wallace is an absolute beast of a human.

[brassnuts]

40 midgets.

[SomethingClever]

[ QUOTE ]
Wallace is an absolute beast of a human.

[/ QUOTE ]

[Blarg]

Boxers have a very peculiar set of skills and unusual builds.

Being athletic, even at a professional level, doesn't mean you have a good chance against even a mediocre boxer.

It's a little like saying, a professional basketball player would probably have a good chance of beating an olympic swimmer who wasn't good enough to win any medals anymore.

They're REALLY different skill sets.

[Clarkmeister]

[ QUOTE ]
Boxers have a very peculiar set of skills and unusual builds.

Being athletic, even at a professional level, doesn't mean you have a good chance against even a mediocre boxer.

It's a little like saying, a professional basketball player would probably have a good chance of beating an olympic swimmer who wasn't good enough to win any medals anymore.

They're REALLY different skill sets.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, yeah yeah. But seriously. Tyson or a crocodile?

[Tron]

[ QUOTE ]
Give Wallace adequate time and I think he'd do it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes, this is very important, how long do they have to train?

[tbach24]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Give Wallace adequate time and I think he'd do it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes, this is very important, how long do they have to train?

[/ QUOTE ]

8-9 months? I don't know how long boxers usually train but that seems to be the intervals between major boxer's fights.

Tyson doesn't look good after his training and since Wallace is already a magnificant specimen of strength and agility, I'm sure he'd be able to pick up on boxing techniques quickly.

[SomethingClever]

[ QUOTE ]
Being athletic, even at a professional level, doesn't mean you have a good chance against even a mediocre boxer.

[/ QUOTE ]

Okay, but remember how big a deal these guys make about weight classes.

When Roy Jones was talking about fighting some heavyweights, a lot of people thought he would just get flat killed.

And this is a guy that just OWNED his own weight for a number of years. By owned I mean pwned, of course. And people thought he couldn't beat guys that were maybe 20 lbs heavier.

Some of the people I listed have like 10" to 12" on Tyson and anywhere from 40 to 100 lbs. That's pretty significant, regardless of ability.

Also, factor in training time, and the fact that Tyson is a washed up loser and, well, the choice is clear: Screech takes him in 3 rounds guaranteed.



http://img.iskon.hr/kl/2002/06/26/0002028s.jpg

[Clarkmeister]

[ QUOTE ]
Screech takes him in 3 rounds guaranteed.


[/ QUOTE ]

ok. Next round. Screech or a wombat?

[Blarg]

The thing is, a huge guy with great reach quickly loses those advantages once a short guy gets on the inside. You don't have anywhere near the leverage, and only a very short space in which to develop explosive power, and a very small target selection, when you've got to pop short punches in on yourself as compared to when you're throwing them out at a guy who's actually in a comfortable fighting range. Even there, you're best as a headhunter.

Once the fight gets taken in close, you don't have an advantage any more with long limbs, and the ball's completely in the other guy's court. You have to be a much better fighter than he is. I doubt any basketball players out there are much better fighters than Tyson is, so they'd better be brilliant at keeping him outside, because it's over almost instantly if Tyson gets past a punch and in close.

[Diplomat]

Screech > Wombat but draws poorly and gets flattened by ryno.

-Diplomat

[chesspain]

[ QUOTE ]
Yeah, yeah yeah. But seriously. Tyson or a crocodile?

[/ QUOTE ]

I'ld hate to get bitten...so I'll have to choose the crocodile.

[Sully]

http://images.chron.com/content/news/photos/02/10/27/oneal.jpg

If Shaq made a serious (12 - 18 mo) training effort, he could be promoted as a serious Heavyweight contender. Boxing is so screwed up that he could fight for the title on Pay-Per-View and it would be the best Heavyweight fight that has come along in five years.

I'm not saying that he is a legitimate fighter....I'm saying that these days, Heavyweight Boxing resembles Jerry Springer more than it does the Sweet Science.

And I would pay $100 to see Shaq fight the champ WAY before I'd pay to see the "champ" fight another journeymen.

[Clarkmeister]

[ QUOTE ]
Screech > Wombat but draws poorly and gets flattened by ryno.

-Diplomat

[/ QUOTE ]

Only if Ryno survives the long awaited rematch with Lion.

[bottomset]

are we talking 05 Tyson or 86 Tyson

because not a single person listed so far has the balls to step in the ring with the 86 version, and not 1 would last 3minutes against him

nowadays who knows

[SomethingClever]

[ QUOTE ]
are we talking 05 Tyson or 86 Tyson

[/ QUOTE ]

Clearly the 05 model.

I'm sure the 86 Tyson would shatter every single one of Ben Wallace/Screech/Pee Wee Herman's bones within 20 seconds.

[jakethebake]

I couldn't find IndieMatty's old avatar. Close enough...

http://img60.exs.cx/img60/2446/e8-afroninja.gif

[jcmack13]

I think the clear question is how many five-year-olds could Tyson take on in the ring at once. No eating.

[tbach24]

That's easily the most awesome thing I've ever seen.