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View Full Version : Adventures of the Commode, The Short Version...


09-24-2001, 10:21 PM
Has Mother Nature ever called to you during a poker game. Sure she has and it's a darn good thing most Casinos take care to give us a clean and a electronically flush able environment. Of course there are those, who use the stalls and are to lazy to lift the seat. What gives with these aimless squirt gun jockeys? Do they spray their homes in the same fashion as they disrespect their fellow gamblers? Did they flunk bathroom etiquette, are they afraid to aim because they fear they will go blind? These trailer park baboons are disgusting!


Now when Mother Nature calls and all the stalls are taken but one. Sure enough it has to be the one stall last used by a blind baboon with a crooked water pistil. When Mother Nature calls she means business, no time to search the Casino for other options. So we are forced into latrine duty. With very few cleaning utensils and precious little time to complete the cleaning job. However, poker players are resourceful humans, we wipe up the mess with the tools at hand. Making sure none of the disgusting liquid touches our hands.


Then we line the seat with the handy sanitized paper seat cover as our final line of defense against butt infection. We turn our back side to the commode, drop our trousers, then slowly lower our posterior and then it happens. The electronically flush able commode is triggered and the sanitized paper protector flushes down the commode. We slam on the breaks to save our butts from the cold germ invested bare seat. Damn that was close! So we turn around complete the process for the second time and gently begin to sit. Then the all seeing electric eye zaps our protection from under our back sides again. Some times it takes a few trail runs to get our timing just right.


SPM,...could there be a guy with a button playing with our heads...

09-24-2001, 10:39 PM
You know some of us read this forum while catching a quick late night bite to eat.


May I suggest introducing a little more roughage into your diet? Perhaps this will create a rhythym in your daily routine and allow you take care of the 3 S's (shit, shower, shave) in the A.M.


For now, I'll just put this dinner which my wife was nice enough to heat up for me, back in the fridge.

09-24-2001, 10:44 PM
this one was a little anal...gl

09-25-2001, 02:36 AM
...at least we didn't get the long version


Generally a fan of SPM but this was a bit out there.

09-25-2001, 09:46 AM
democracy does have it's problems... heh