Taking a girl out, but she has a BF..

[handsome]

Background: This is a girl that I met two summers ago. I was really fond of her for a few months. We kicked it every other day or so and started a meaningful relationship (rare for me). At that time she was very innocent, so the most we ever did was make out, though I really wanted to stick it in her pooper. Anyhow, at the end of the summer she had to go back to home in Korea (she is American born, but her dad is in the korean military or some [censored]) and I haven't seen her since.

Well, she's been back in New York for several months to go to college. I should also mention she found a boyfriend a few weeks after she left me and that she turned slutty with him, almost shamelessly. She admitted to several sexual acts with her boyfriend as if I meant nothing to her. Of course this got me bitter and jealous (please keep this in mind)

Now.. the homewrecker part of me really wants to "win her back" and another part of me wants me to lay off and let her enjoy her relationship. She has the afternoon off for tomorrow so I'm taking her out, with no definite plans. This is where you guys come in.

I can either:
a) charm her on a long subway ride to manhattan, take her to a nice restaurant and make her feel very special
b) pick her up in my car, take her out for some inexpensive thai food and drop her off at home

Option A: She doesn't get that type of treatment from anyone. I know that I am much more charming and charismatic than her boyfriend, so this option would certainly make her think twice about going back to him. Implied odds, if you will...

Option B: this option would make for a cheap "date" to prolong our friendship. However, there is nothing romantic about thai food, and you know the rest.

Of course, I'm open for suggestions... option C, anyone?

[Blackjack]

Romantic feeling in Thai Food.. meaning the irrestistable urge to take a huge wet dump after you've eaten it?

[Blackjack]

The pooper option is definitely off tommorow night if you eat Thai Food.

[Hiding]

c: split the bill anywhere, be friends now and be honest.

If the slutty side bothers you now, what about 5 months from now when you are with her and thats all you can think of is her with some dude doing crap you never imagined? Deal with the obsession then look at somthing more than friends. Just my thoughts from previous experiences in my life.

[mason55]

If she's slutting out to her bf you're not charming her away from him. If you really think you have a chance (and I don't) take her out, get her drunk, and [censored] her.

SEriously. That's the best you're going to get. Don't get emotionally attached to a slut. there's 3 billion girls in the world. most of them are sluts. just [censored] them. eventually you'll find one that isn't a slut but she'll still cheat on you.

[Blackjack]

Bad experiences with trusting women Mason?

[mason55]

[ QUOTE ]
Bad experiences with trusting women Mason?

[/ QUOTE ]

what makes you say that /images/graemlins/wink.gif

i'm enjoying the single life. don't worry about me.

[theredpill6]

Why does it bother you that she had sex with another guy after leaving you ?

And why the hell did she tell you what she did with her new boyfriend ? This relationship is weird.

[mason55]

[ QUOTE ]
Why does it bother you that she had sex with another guy after leaving you ?

And why the hell did she tell you what she did with her new boyfriend ? This relationship is weird.

[/ QUOTE ]

I assume this was supposed to go to the OP. And I agree. Just [censored] her. Don't try to have a relationship. It's that simple.

God i feel like this board is full of 8 year olds.

[PoBoy321]

Your best option is to take her up to Webster Ave. in the Bronx, drop her off in front of a liquor store and let her fend for herself.

[Stuey]

[ QUOTE ]
This relationship is weird.

[/ QUOTE ]

Every relationship I ever had was weird at some point. Good chance it was because I was in it! /images/graemlins/wink.gif

All I have to add is that I have noticed there are several women who like to trade up and or never want to be single even for a day. They are always lining up a better/different guy to switch to.

Now I don't mean the boyfriend she got was better than you. I am saying she needed someone so she took the nearest guy. And now she might be looking to trade back.

So I say do it. And enjoy it, but don't get attached to her because she is not worth keeping long-term imo. But why not hit it?

edit: this is to the OP I just wanted to quote you red as I like the line. /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[mason55]

The answer to 90% of questions about girls is "The Ladder Theory"

[Felix_Nietsche]

.............take her to a nice restaurant. No way Jose! Save this for a woman who is your GF and deserves it. This woman does NOT qualify. At the minimum for a woman your regularly sleeping with.

Take her to a NORMAL restaurant. I've found spending less money on women yeilds better results with regard to coitus.

[CardSharpCook]

[ QUOTE ]
c: split the bill anywhere, be friends now and be honest.

If the slutty side bothers you now, what about 5 months from now when you are with her and thats all you can think of is her with some dude doing crap you never imagined? Deal with the obsession then look at somthing more than friends. Just my thoughts from previous experiences in my life.

[/ QUOTE ]

As an older wiser member of this forum (just turned 25), I must share with you the wisdom of my years.... When you take a girl to a restuarant, you don't split the flipping bill. You pay, because you are a gentleman. Hell, the same goes with male friends, the only difference is you take turns paying. Splitting the dinner bill is something you did in HS because you got paid $5 an hour working at McDonalds.

As for this girl.... Dude, just be her friend. If it is meant to be, it will be. You enjoy spending time with her so... enjoy spending time with her.

CSC

[mason55]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
c: split the bill anywhere, be friends now and be honest.

If the slutty side bothers you now, what about 5 months from now when you are with her and thats all you can think of is her with some dude doing crap you never imagined? Deal with the obsession then look at somthing more than friends. Just my thoughts from previous experiences in my life.

[/ QUOTE ]

As an older wiser member of this forum (just turned 25), I must share with you the wisdom of my years.... When you take a girl to a restuarant, you don't split the flipping bill. You pay, because you are a gentleman. Hell, the same goes with male friends, the only difference is you take turns paying. Splitting the dinner bill is something you did in HS because you got paid $5 an hour working at McDonalds.

As for this girl.... Dude, just be her friend. If it is meant to be, it will be. You enjoy spending time with her so... enjoy spending time with her.

CSC

[/ QUOTE ]

If you want to just be her friend then take her out to lucnh, pay for it, then take her home.

If you want to [censored] her, take her to DINNER. Make some casual converstaion to determine if you're going to get laid. If you ARE going to get laid, pay for dinner and take her back to your place. if you're not getting laid pay for dinner, drop her at home and never talk to her again.

as i said before, there's WAY too many girls in the world to waste all this time worrying about one that already has a boyfriend and might not be into you any more.

[tpir90036]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In risposta di:</font><hr />
...this option would certainly make her think twice about going back to him....

[/ QUOTE ]
Did she leave him in the first place? Do you think she is interested in bailing her boyfriend for you?

If you think she would cheat on him or dump him at the drop of a hat then she is probably not worth it....unless you are simply trying to get to her piss fenders.

[Blackjack]

No need to pay retail for used baggage.

Blackjack

[mason55]

[ QUOTE ]
No need to pay retail for used baggage.

Blackjack

[/ QUOTE ]

Depends on the intentions. If he's at dinner and finds out he's getting laid for sure it's worth paying for dinner to take a pussy in the bush (is that how the saying goes???). If I meet a girl at a bar I won't usually pay for her drinks but if I'm out to dinner with a girl who I know is going to [censored] me i'll buy her dinner. If I want to be friends I'll pay because I'd buy any of my friends lunch. The only time I"d consider making her pay is if I REALLY didn't care about her any more. in that case i'd just ditch her with the check.

[1800GAMBLER]

[ QUOTE ]
Bad experiences with trusting women Mason?

[/ QUOTE ]

He has a point. She's slutting out to a guy. You take her out. She cheats on him goes with you. You get together. You have no reason to believe she wouldn't cheat on you. 3 months later you just worry and it spoils a shitty relationship. Drop this girl.

[thisispathetic]

Option C - Grow the FUC up!

[CardSharpCook]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Bad experiences with trusting women Mason?

[/ QUOTE ]

He has a point. She's slutting out to a guy. You take her out. She cheats on him goes with you. You get together. You have no reason to believe she wouldn't cheat on you. 3 months later you just worry and it spoils a shitty relationship. Drop this girl.

[/ QUOTE ]

No, she's not "slutting herself out to this guy" she's telling our man, Handsome that this is what she is doing. This means one of two things: She tells him this because she knows that he still wants her, so she wants him to "get it" that she is very much "with" this guy... OR she is a little bit ashamed and NEEDS acceptance, probably willing to jump in the sack with Handsome so long as he seems to both want her and he understands and accepts that she has had a LOT of sex with someone else. Damned if I know which one is right, but that is what I see.

Anyway, let us know what happens.

[CardSharpCook]

[ QUOTE ]
Option C - Grow the FUC up!

[/ QUOTE ]

this is pathetic. Take your own advice.

[gorie]

why does everyone keep calling her "slutty" for having sex with her boyfriend.

??????

[thisispathetic]

Happy 13th birthday Csc

[CardSharpCook]

[ QUOTE ]
why does everyone keep calling her "slutty" for having sex with her boyfriend.

??????

[/ QUOTE ]

see OP: [ QUOTE ]
I should also mention she found a boyfriend a few weeks after she left me and that she turned slutty with him, almost shamelessly. She admitted to several sexual acts with her boyfriend as if I meant nothing to her.

[/ QUOTE ]

Isn't that what sluts do? Have sex with their boyfriends? Good girls wait 'til marriage.

Seriously, I don't get it either and would love Handsome to explain a little here.

[Los Feliz Slim]

Dating a really innocent girl and then having her turn into Ms. Caligula five minutes after you break up is a Top 10 sucky event. It's the sexual equivalent of loosening the stuck-on lid on a jar of pickles so somebody else can open it up reap the rewards. Except much worse and totally different.

[theredpill6]

[ QUOTE ]
sexual equivalent of loosening the stuck-on lid on a jar of pickles so somebody else can open it up reap the rewards.

[/ QUOTE ]

Nice.

[Phoenix1010]

Agree, I'm confused by that as well. I think maybe he meant that she lost her innocence and sex became not such a big deal to her anymore. That's what happens when they lose their virginity... doesn't make anyone slutty. If that's how you feel about girls, you're going to have to find a virgin to deflower to ever not be bothered in your relationship. I also don't get the "almost shamelessly" add on; what should she be ashamed of?

To the OP, she has a boyfriend, she's off-limits. If she has some long lost love for you that lasted from your casual relationship however long ago, let her break it off with her BF first. This is not your place to actively try to "win her back." If you actively try to woo her away, or worse follow Mason's advice and try to get some casual sex out of her, you deserve a severe ass kicking.

-Phoenix

[1800GAMBLER]

[ QUOTE ]
No, she's not "slutting herself out to this guy"

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
I should also mention she found a boyfriend a few weeks after she left me and that she turned slutty with him

[/ QUOTE ]


Obviously there is a gray area since we don't know what she said, it could be nothing slutty, but i doubt that since someone who likes her a lot said she is being slutty.

Anyhow, that arguement is totally pointless if this girl is willing to cheat on her bf for our hero. I wouldn't take any girl who has cheated/would be willing to sleep with me will with someone else. Eff that.

[handsome]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I should also mention she found a boyfriend a few weeks after she left me and that she turned slutty with him, almost shamelessly. She admitted to several sexual acts with her boyfriend as if I meant nothing to her.

[/ QUOTE ]

Isn't that what sluts do? Have sex with their boyfriends? Good girls wait 'til marriage.

Seriously, I don't get it either and would love Handsome to explain a little here.

[/ QUOTE ]

I didn't wanna be specific about her sluttiness, but it involves her having sex in her school auditorium, gymnasium and several other public places (with an audience involved), as well as having sex over a dozen times in a day. There are a couple of other things but I'd rather not divulge.

Anyway I decided I'm going with option B. I'll lechoo guys know if I stick it in her pooper.

[mason55]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I should also mention she found a boyfriend a few weeks after she left me and that she turned slutty with him, almost shamelessly. She admitted to several sexual acts with her boyfriend as if I meant nothing to her.

[/ QUOTE ]

Isn't that what sluts do? Have sex with their boyfriends? Good girls wait 'til marriage.

Seriously, I don't get it either and would love Handsome to explain a little here.

[/ QUOTE ]

I didn't wanna be specific about her sluttiness, but it involves her having sex in her school auditorium, gymnasium and several other public places (with an audience involved), as well as having sex over a dozen times in a day. There are a couple of other things but I'd rather not divulge.

Anyway I decided I'm going with option B. I'll lechoo guys know if I stick it in her pooper.

[/ QUOTE ]

Can I get her number?

[BeerMoney]

[ QUOTE ]
If she's slutting out to her bf you're not charming her away from him. If you really think you have a chance (and I don't) take her out, get her drunk, and [censored] her.

SEriously. That's the best you're going to get. Don't get emotionally attached to a slut. there's 3 billion girls in the world. most of them are sluts. just [censored] them. eventually you'll find one that isn't a slut but she'll still cheat on you.

[/ QUOTE ]

U won't get any better advice than this.

[Awesemo]

Buying her dinner is definitely not going to "charm" her. If anything, she will just get more turned off. Why do you feel it is important to take her to dinner? She would probably enjoy a more unconvential date. Just take her to do something fun, and try to have an enjoyable time with her.

[marsvolta619]

I dated a girl senior year in high school. She was a virgin but she gave good head. She was the coolest girl, we were awesome together. Right before we started dating, she broke up with her 25 year old boyfriend. We got along so good we were like best friends and all that. Well, turns out she never really stopped being with that guy, and they ended up meeting and having sex after I would drop her off from dates and whatnot. Her best friend had to tell me, but "she really loves you and just uses him for sex." Yay for me.

So a year later in college, I see her. A lot! You know why? She was [censored] over half of my football team. On away games, I would hear them talking about getting their dicks sucked by her the night before. She even got gangbanged by a few of them. But I still had feelings for her, I wanted to save her. I thought I loved her(stupid 18 year old love). But I never talked to her again because I didn't want to get involved with that mess.

My point of this is if you still have feelings for her but get ill thinking about what she became, stay away. What good is taking her to lunch/dinner going to accomplish? You know where the conversation is headed.

[DBowling]

[ QUOTE ]
I dated a girl senior year in high school. She was a virgin but she gave good head. She was the coolest girl, we were awesome together. Right before we started dating, she broke up with her 25 year old boyfriend. We got along so good we were like best friends and all that. Well, turns out she never really stopped being with that guy, and they ended up meeting and having sex after I would drop her off from dates and whatnot. Her best friend had to tell me, but "she really loves you and just uses him for sex." Yay for me.

So a year later in college, I see her. A lot! You know why? She was [censored] over half of my football team. On away games, I would hear them talking about getting their dicks sucked by her the night before. She even got gangbanged by a few of them. But I still had feelings for her, I wanted to save her. I thought I loved her(stupid 18 year old love). But I never talked to her again because I didn't want to get involved with that mess.

[/ QUOTE ]

this story makes me sad

[Phoenix1010]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I dated a girl senior year in high school. She was a virgin but she gave good head. She was the coolest girl, we were awesome together. Right before we started dating, she broke up with her 25 year old boyfriend. We got along so good we were like best friends and all that. Well, turns out she never really stopped being with that guy, and they ended up meeting and having sex after I would drop her off from dates and whatnot. Her best friend had to tell me, but "she really loves you and just uses him for sex." Yay for me.

So a year later in college, I see her. A lot! You know why? She was [censored] over half of my football team. On away games, I would hear them talking about getting their dicks sucked by her the night before. She even got gangbanged by a few of them. But I still had feelings for her, I wanted to save her. I thought I loved her(stupid 18 year old love). But I never talked to her again because I didn't want to get involved with that mess.

[/ QUOTE ]

this story makes me sad

[/ QUOTE ]

This is why I can never have a daughter.

[handsome]

Nice story. I guess it's time for me to find some new prey.

BTW, I just got back from our "date" and she doesn't look half as good as she used to. Next time I'll remember to take pics.

[Yeti]

No pooper then?

[DiamondDave]

What do you think she thinks you'll do after she tells you such things?