cheating

[gorie]

[fnord_too]

You really should have a second poll, "have you ever been cheated on?"

[kyro]

I know you haven't been here long, but this poll has been done many times before. It usually sparks some interesting conversation.

[gorie]

oops! oh well /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[Soul Daddy]

No. I once broke up with a girl just before leaving for Spring Break so it wouldn't be cheating if I hooked up.

[Jack of Arcades]

The relationship would have to be pretty messed up for me to do so, I think.

I have been someone that a girl cheated on her fiance with..

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

I came close once. If I would've known then what I realized a little while after, I probably would've. Or actually, I probably would've broken up for the other chick, which would've made it not cheating.

[kyro]

but, like the simpsons/family guy quote threads, they're always fun to read about again /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[BusterStacks]

I think a better poll would be "have you ever NOT cheated?"

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
I think a better poll would be "have you ever NOT cheated?"

[/ QUOTE ]
I would answer yes to this one, assuming that you mean that the opportunity was very real and I had to actually make a decision not to cheat, as opposed to "you guys are all such assholes that you've probably cheated on every girl, but have you ever had a girlfriend you haven't cheated on". Well, I guess I'd answer yes to that one too, but the first interpretation is more interesting.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

I'm a bit overly-verbose tonight. Maybe it's an effect of the assraping I just took by a table full of mouthbreathers coldcalling their way to rivering 2-outers every hand I played.

[ClaytonN]

No, and never.

[jason_t]

[ QUOTE ]
I know you haven't been here long, but this poll has been done many times before. It usually sparks some interesting conversation.

[/ QUOTE ]

Here's one (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=1955204&page=&view=&sb=5& o=&fpart=1&vc=1).

[Shillx]

Hard to cheat when you have never had a GF...

But no I would never consider cheating if I did.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
Hard to cheat when you have never had a GF...

[/ QUOTE ]
Wow... I sense another classic-OOT-style thread coming up.

[gorie]

anyone wanna fess up to the "kinda"s and explain what "kinda" means ?

[sublime]

anyone wanna fess up to the "kinda"s and explain what "kinda" means ?

my guess would be dead and the goat incident

[ClaytonN]

Here's a hint:

Anyone who put kinda should go under "yes".

[BottlesOf]

ok many people in this poll are not being honest.

[Matty]

Only 18%? You all are insane. For the most part I stay out of relationships now because I know I'll end up cheating. This poll can't possibly be representative of the entire population.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
anyone wanna fess up to the "kinda"s and explain what "kinda" means ?

[/ QUOTE ]
I'll give you my "close, but not quite", which could potentially be interpreted as a "kinda". I was dating this girl in college. I went on an internship in another state for the summer, where I met this very cool chick. We both obviously had feelings for each other, but I had a girlfriend and she had a boyfriend. We hung out a lot, got to be real close, we talked about all our personal stuff, stuff that I didn't talk about with my girlfriend, etc. We pretty much had a 'moment' where we were this close to kissing - it was the exact movie-style guy and girl finally having the right moment kind of thing.

I guess we essentially cheated mentally/emotionally, just not quite physically. That's kind of a girly interpretation of cheating, but whatever.

[Matty]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
anyone wanna fess up to the "kinda"s and explain what "kinda" means ?

[/ QUOTE ]
I'll give you my "close, but not quite", which could potentially be interpreted as a "kinda". I was dating this girl in college. I went on an internship in another state for the summer, where I met this very cool chick. We both obviously had feelings for each other, but I had a girlfriend and she had a boyfriend. We hung out a lot, got to be real close, we talked about all our personal stuff, stuff that I didn't talk about with my girlfriend, etc. We pretty much had a 'moment' where we were this close to kissing - it was the exact movie-style guy and girl finally having the right moment kind of thing.

I guess we essentially cheated mentally/emotionally, just not quite physically. That's kind of a girly interpretation of cheating, but whatever.

[/ QUOTE ]Wow- my idea of "kinda" is "oral".

[gorie]

my boyfriend did the "kinda" cheating thing.. comparable to what you described .. as far as i know though it was just all on the computer (though we both knew the girl in person previously). i'll never really know if he really anything in person or not and in a way i guess i'd rather not know.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
anyone wanna fess up to the "kinda"s and explain what "kinda" means ?

[/ QUOTE ]
I'll give you my "close, but not quite", which could potentially be interpreted as a "kinda". I was dating this girl in college. I went on an internship in another state for the summer, where I met this very cool chick. We both obviously had feelings for each other, but I had a girlfriend and she had a boyfriend. We hung out a lot, got to be real close, we talked about all our personal stuff, stuff that I didn't talk about with my girlfriend, etc. We pretty much had a 'moment' where we were this close to kissing - it was the exact movie-style guy and girl finally having the right moment kind of thing.

I guess we essentially cheated mentally/emotionally, just not quite physically. That's kind of a girly interpretation of cheating, but whatever.

[/ QUOTE ]Wow- my idea of "kinda" is "oral".

[/ QUOTE ]
Exactly. That's why my "kinda" is really more of a girl's interpretation of "kinda". My interpretation is probably closer to yours, although I guess I'm more of a "If you answered 'kinda', then you really should've answered yes" kind of guy. It's either you cheated or you didn't and my "kinda" was a non-cheat. I'd say oral is cheating, though.

[jdl22]

[ QUOTE ]
we talked about all our personal stuff, stuff that I didn't talk about with my girlfriend, etc.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not sure why but this strikes me as a bit odd. Are you referring to specific things about your girlfriend here that you wouldn't discuss in a frank manner with her, or other topics you aren't comfortable talking to her about?

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
we talked about all our personal stuff, stuff that I didn't talk about with my girlfriend, etc.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not sure why but this strikes me as a bit odd. Are you referring to specific things about your girlfriend here that you wouldn't discuss in a frank manner with her, or other topics you aren't comfortable talking to her about?

[/ QUOTE ]
The latter. We just talked about more stuff.

[SackUp]

[ QUOTE ]
my boyfriend did the "kinda" cheating thing.. comparable to what you described .. as far as i know though it was just all on the computer (though we both knew the girl in person previously). i'll never really know if he really anything in person or not and in a way i guess i'd rather not know.

[/ QUOTE ]

Internet cheat that's awesome! He was doing some dirty cybering eh?? LOL!!

[jdl22]

While I'm not normal, I'm willing to discuss basically anything with a variety of people, I would take this as a sign that things aren't going well at all with the gf. It seems this was the case based on your comments. I think that your willingness to discuss more things with someone else would be a much bigger sign of trouble than either of you actually having sex with someone else.

Again, I think discussing problems in the relationship with girls that are friends is different. It's actually quite helpful.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

Right. This is exactly right and I agree completely. Like I said, I probably had more business being with the summer friend than the girlfriend.

[Jakesta]

Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever. I've been cheated on and it feels AWFUL. I have had girls come to me before and ask me to when I have been with girls, and I have always turned them down. It has not been easy sometimes, but I have managed.

Cheating is rampant in our society and it is truly one of the worst things that you can do to your significant other.

[James282]

Take this poll again with the same people ten years down the road and I guarantee the "yes" column is over 50. Most men do it at some point, especially in college, and I think the demographic of this forum reflects people who are young and have been in very few relationships.
-James

[Jakesta]

James282, I have no doubt that you would be right. Our society's morals are decaying, and the media is playing a large role. Now before you think that I am some right-wing moralist, I'm not. I have no problem with people doing consensual things that they want to do. I just have problems with people doing things that hurt people as bad as cheating. I know that I will never do it, and you are right that I have been in very few relationships. I'm only in my fourth ever, right now. But cheating is an awful thing.

[oreogod]

[ QUOTE ]
Wow- my idea of "kinda" is "oral".

[/ QUOTE ]

Its pretty much a given that you are cheating if your d!ck is currently inserted in any other girls wet orfice, who is not currently going by the title of girlfriend.

[oreogod]

[ QUOTE ]
I have no doubt that you would be right. Our society's morals are decaying, and the media is playing a large role.

[/ QUOTE ]

Oui. This is not new...this has been happening over the entire span of human history. Also as such, morals are an everchanging viewpoint.

Example: Gays. Okay in greek and rome, bad now. In fact the greeks never had a word for "female" or "woman"...they believed everyone was male, hence men having sex with other men was completely common place and morally acceptable by society.

The morals of the future may even sicken you, whether they get so completely conservative that they suffocate you or so loose you are appalled.

Media or not, society's do rise and fall and their morals go with them. Who knows what things will be like centruies from now. The media thing is usually a nice cop out, but videogames and movies do not kill people or make them have gay sex or do hate crimes, it takes an actually person, to make the desicion. Taking the homosexuality out of it (I dont see a problem with it) -- to kill someone or do a hate crime involves screwed up thinking by someone who was already demented to begin with. That or stupidity I suppose.

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
ok many people in this poll are not being honest.

[/ QUOTE ]

[Jakesta]

I have no problem with gays. They should do what makes them happy. I'm just saying that cheating is encouraged in our media. We see it in shows all the time, and it's gotten so bad that just adultery alone is not a basis for a divorce request in some states. I've heard statistics saying that 50% of marriages involve cheating.

[oreogod]

But you do realize that cheating has been ongoing for centuries, way before mass media. And I would say it happened quite a bit back then.

I think if u are going to cheat you are going to cheat. Media never influenced my desicion. (with an ex, not my current girlfriend. I did it because I wanted to, she was hot, and I wanted to do someone new. But it should also be noted my feelings for my ex werent that great.)

[TimM]

Something in between these two.

no, but i probably would
no. i would never even consider it.

I'd like to think I'd never consider it, so I chose that one, but you never know. I'm no saint though, I've been with two women who were cheating on someone, and talked to several married women online who wanted to meet me. I guess I'm pretty good at listening to them complain about their husbands or boyfriends, and that leads to them wanting to do bad things with me. /images/graemlins/blush.gif

[scotty34]

I ended up hooking up with the girl I asked to prom, and we started going out after that (April I believe). I really only wanted to go to prom as friends, but things just sort of happened. Once summer rolled around though, she was never around, and I never even knew where she was. I would call her house, and her dad would tell me she just left for a week for a b-ball tourney or other weird things I didn't even know about. WTF?

So in July, a few of my friends and I went on a grad trip to Mexico. It was done through a tour company, and there were 700 grad students from across the province all booked into the same hotel on the beach. I'm pretty sure the entire purpose of the trip for 90% of people was to get laid (for many to lose their virginity). I ended up hooking up with two girls down there. I didn't even really feel guilty about it, as I was never really even seeing my "g/f" anyways, plus there is the whole area code argument.

I came back (didn't tell her) and saw her maybe two or three more times the rest of the summer, which is ridiculous seeing as we live like 20 mins from each other. She was just never around. In September we both moved to Vancouver - me to UBC, and her to SFU. Again, I would never see her. I saw her twice between September and mid October, and one of those times it was because it was her b-day. I lived in Totem Park residence which is notorious for young sluts wanting to get laid. During the mad partying for the first few weeks, I would get drunk and couldn't resist. I hooked up with four other girls, until I finally realized I was a horrible person and broke up with my g/f. I never did have the balls to tell her about the cheating though.

PS: she never put out anyway

[DBowling]

no

[Pocket Trips]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Wow- my idea of "kinda" is "oral".

[/ QUOTE ]

Its pretty much a given that you are cheating if your d!ck is currently inserted in any other girls wet orfice, who is not currently going by the title of girlfriend.

[/ QUOTE ]


ok so using lube = cheating

no lube is perfectly ok /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[gorie]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
my boyfriend did the "kinda" cheating thing.. comparable to what you described .. as far as i know though it was just all on the computer (though we both knew the girl in person previously). i'll never really know if he really anything in person or not and in a way i guess i'd rather not know.

[/ QUOTE ]

Internet cheat that's awesome! He was doing some dirty cybering eh?? LOL!!

[/ QUOTE ]
i dunno, probably. i meant more the "mental/emotional" cheating. which could have very easily been real cheating, since she lived in the same city most of the time.

the 3 of us use to hang out sometimes. when he and i started dating she always had to try to get him to choose her over me any chance she could get and "fake flirt" etc. she had no interest in him she just was one of those girls. she wasn't really a good friend to me, so i stopped being her friend at some point (i was never mean to her, but this made her hate me).

anyway, he stayed in contact with her online and still liked her. i accepted it but didn't like it. i didn't feel it was my place to tell him who he could be friends with. i found out most of their conversation revolved around me.. she complained to him a lot about her fiance, he complained a lot to her about needing a new girlfriend (this came from me not having a job and that frustrated him a lot. me not having a job came from my depression related to our relationship and my issues that Dead often refers to! when we had our talks everything was always good and he wanted to be with me [agreeing he treated me like crap and would 'get better']. behind my back was another story.). her calling me names, him laughing along making fun of me.. flirting a lot, talking about personal stuff, talking about how they should hook up, etc.

at first i just found out she was saying mean things about me in IMs cuz a couple times i'd just notice it as i walked by. after awhile i started to get hurt that he'd even want to talk to someone like her if he cared about me because it was very disrespectful. so he said he'd stop talking to her. then he started lying to me about talking to her.. and getting really (obviously) sneaky about it.

i ended up getting "sneaky" back and logging some of their conversations (haha, suckers!), reading emails etc. normally i am not the type that would do stuff like that, but i knew something bad was going on, and he would never admit to it.

that's when i found out the context of their conversation and that it was really bad stuff. so i broke up with him and moved back into my parents house.

but then i couldn't stand living at my parents, i didn't even have a bed there anymore, so within a week i came back to him. he didn't even try to get me back until i came back to him. yeah lame i know. we had a big talk (well mostly me talking at/for him). he promised not to talk to her anymore, we both agreed she is the devil.

basically she was on a mission to break us up. he was just too dumb to see that.

he did stop talking to her for awhile, and later he got caught when he started again (like a year later i felt something was up again). i forgave him for some reason. and i'm pretty sure he doesn't talk to her anymore, at least he swears he doesn't. this all happened like 6 years ago, we've been together like 7 years. he is a lot nicer to me now i know that.

and yes that "i had permission" vote came from me. you can probably figure that out somehow. i was pretty close to realizing i deserved better, and had the chance to find out. i was always very honest to him about my feelings, and my curiosity, so he knew all about it. i still want to think i deserve better, sometimes. then others would say i am lucky. in some ways i am, in some ways i am not. but he's actually a great boyfriend we both love each other a lot, but there's always going to be something missing. sometimes i don't know what to expect because he is my first boyfriend, and it's hard to know what is important sometimes. oddly enough, he has treated me much better since i "cheated" on him.

i know, more than anyone cares to know, but you got me going!

[cnfuzzd]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
my boyfriend did the "kinda" cheating thing.. comparable to what you described .. as far as i know though it was just all on the computer (though we both knew the girl in person previously). i'll never really know if he really anything in person or not and in a way i guess i'd rather not know.

[/ QUOTE ]

Internet cheat that's awesome! He was doing some dirty cybering eh?? LOL!!

[/ QUOTE ]
i dunno, probably. i meant more the "mental/emotional" cheating. which could have very easily been real cheating, since she lived in the same city most of the time.

the 3 of us use to hang out sometimes. when he and i started dating she always had to try to get him to choose her over me any chance she could get and "fake flirt" etc. she had no interest in him she just was one of those girls. she wasn't really a good friend to me, so i stopped being her friend at some point (i was never mean to her, but this made her hate me).

anyway, he stayed in contact with her online and still liked her. i accepted it but didn't like it. i didn't feel it was my place to tell him who he could be friends with. i found out most of their conversation revolved around me.. she complained to him a lot about her fiance, he complained a lot to her about needing a new girlfriend (this came from me not having a job and that frustrated him a lot. me not having a job came from my depression related to our relationship and my issues that Dead often refers to! when we had our talks everything was always good and he wanted to be with me [agreeing he treated me like crap and would 'get better']. behind my back was another story.). her calling me names, him laughing along making fun of me.. flirting a lot, talking about personal stuff, talking about how they should hook up, etc.

at first i just found out she was saying mean things about me in IMs cuz a couple times i'd just notice it as i walked by. after awhile i started to get hurt that he'd even want to talk to someone like her if he cared about me because it was very disrespectful. so he said he'd stop talking to her. then he started lying to me about talking to her.. and getting really (obviously) sneaky about it.

i ended up getting "sneaky" back and logging some of their conversations (haha, suckers!), reading emails etc. normally i am not the type that would do stuff like that, but i knew something bad was going on, and he would never admit to it.

that's when i found out the context of their conversation and that it was really bad stuff. so i broke up with him and moved back into my parents house.

but then i couldn't stand living at my parents, i didn't even have a bed there anymore, so within a week i came back to him. he didn't even try to get me back until i came back to him. yeah lame i know. we had a big talk (well mostly me talking at/for him). he promised not to talk to her anymore, we both agreed she is the devil.

basically she was on a mission to break us up. he was just too dumb to see that.

he did stop talking to her for awhile, and later he got caught when he started again (like a year later i felt something was up again). i forgave him for some reason. and i'm pretty sure he doesn't talk to her anymore. i dunno, this all happened like 6 years ago, we've been together like 7 years. he is a lot nicer to me now i know that.

and yes that "i had permission" vote came from me. you can probably figure that out somehow. i was pretty close to realizing i deserved better, and had the chance to find out. i was always very honest to him about my feelings, and my curiosity, so he knew all about it. i still want to think i deserve better, sometimes. then others would say i am lucky. in some ways i am, in some ways i am not. but he's actually a great boyfriend we both love each other a lot, but there's always going to be something missing. sometimes i don't know what to expect because he is my first boyfriend, and it's hard to know what is important sometimes. oddly enough, he has treated me much better since i "cheated" on him.

i know, more than anyone cares to know, but you got me going!

[/ QUOTE ]

you are a better person that one who sneaks around logging conversations and silently fuming about your paramours attempts to broaden his horizons with this two-bit home-wrecking hussy. Clearly the better option is sweet payback. IM me anytime.

a/s/l?

peace

john nickle

[gorie]

[ QUOTE ]
you are a better person that one who sneaks around logging conversations and silently fuming about your paramours attempts to broaden his horizons with this two-bit home-wrecking hussy. Clearly the better option is sweet payback. IM me anytime.

a/s/l?

peace

john nickle

[/ QUOTE ]
pics plz.

[cnfuzzd]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
you are a better person that one who sneaks around logging conversations and silently fuming about your paramours attempts to broaden his horizons with this two-bit home-wrecking hussy. Clearly the better option is sweet payback. IM me anytime.

a/s/l?

peace

john nickle

[/ QUOTE ]
pics plz.

[/ QUOTE ]

uh uh. Ive played that game. I send you the pictures of me in my giant banana suit smearing myself with corn huskers lotion, and then instead of getting any action, they just get spread all over the internet. You first.

"She's uh... she's got sandy blonde hair. She's uh... pretty good looking face, but I'm just getting really... just kinda TOO'd because... I mean she hasn't even sent me a full body shot yet."

Oh, and wtf is any sane person doing up at this hour on a saturday morning, and more to the point, is that cheating sack of overactive hormones up also? I enjoy breaking up relationships before breakfast.

peace

john nickle

[LaggyLou]

[ QUOTE ]
i still want to think i deserve better, sometimes. then others would say i am lucky. in some ways i am, in some ways i am not.

[/ QUOTE ]

Unless he thinks that you're the greatest thing in the world and would never think of getting emotionally envolved with someone else again, you deserve better.

[ QUOTE ]
but there's always going to be something missing

[/ QUOTE ]

Living together is hard. Always being faithful is hard, in some ways. You have to be really, really into each other for it to work out. If you really believe the above quote -- and understanding that I know nothing of this 7-year-relationship other than some of the snippets you've posted on here -- I suggest that you think seriously about whether you want to spend the rest of your life this way.

[gorie]

[ QUOTE ]
Oh, and wtf is any sane person doing up at this hour on a saturday morning, and more to the point, is that cheating sack of overactive hormones up also? I enjoy breaking up relationships before breakfast.

[/ QUOTE ]
well you're too late i just finished my apple jacks!
besides it is 9am here, is it really that insane to be awake this early on a saturday ? well, i never claimed to be normal ! i went to bed at midnight, i get tired cuz i hardly get any sleep during the week. i don't go out.

[cnfuzzd]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Oh, and wtf is any sane person doing up at this hour on a saturday morning, and more to the point, is that cheating sack of overactive hormones up also? I enjoy breaking up relationships before breakfast.

[/ QUOTE ]
well you're too late i just finished my apple jacks!
besides it is 9am here, is it really that insane to be awake this early on a saturday ? well, i never claimed to be normal ! i went to bed at midnight, i get tired cuz i hardly get any sleep during the week. i don't go out.

[/ QUOTE ]

funny, its nine oclock here also. Maybe we are soulmates.

perhaps its just more unusual for me to be awake during this time. Huh. Oh well.

still waiting on more pics. Especially the sexy "i just got done eating apple jacks" pose. ooooooooooooooooowwwweeeeeeeeeeeee.

peace

john nickle

[tbach24]

[ QUOTE ]
apple jacks!

[/ QUOTE ]

Excellent choice. I am eating them too.

[tbach24]

[ QUOTE ]
no. i would never even consider it.

[/ QUOTE ]

I haven't been in a relationship. I have been at all boys school for a while so thats my excuse. I just watched Closer for the second time and it makes me not want to cheat. It just seems so horrible. Throw in what you guys are saying and I never will. I have the horrible premonition that I will be cheated on tho.

[gorie]

[ QUOTE ]
Unless he thinks that you're the greatest thing in the world and would never think of getting emotionally envolved with someone else again, you deserve better.

[/ QUOTE ]
thanks for saying this, and i agree. this is where a lot of my problems use to come from, because he never made me feel that way. but when confronted on it, it was always about how he didn't mean to treat me bad, he just doesn't know how to be a good boyfriend, and how he sucks, etc. usually turning around to him needing the comfort :P but he is also emotionally-retarded (admittedly) and really hard to talk with sometimes about things, to really understand where he is at. it's like i have to talk for him. we both seem happier now, we don't have to have those talks. partly because things changed, and partly because some of those original problems (things that are problems for me, but not problems to him) are still there i just accept them now. i know he wants to be with me, and i can't see him cheating on me. but he likes me because i am cool, he likes who i am. not because he is insanely attracted to me. but i can't be hurt by that, because i feel the same towards him. we have a weird relationship.

[ QUOTE ]
Living together is hard. Always being faithful is hard, in some ways. You have to be really, really into each other for it to work out. If you really believe the above quote -- and understanding that I know nothing of this 7-year-relationship other than some of the snippets you've posted on here -- I suggest that you think seriously about whether you want to spend the rest of your life this way.

[/ QUOTE ]
i use to think about "do i want to spend the rest of my life this way" question a lot.. now not so much. though i can't say i am sure i want to be with him forever (the idea of marriage scares the crap out of me) i just know that even if i thought i needed something else, it is really difficult to imagine him not in my life because he is very important to me.

relationships are confusing ! for the most part we're happy though, it's only every once and awhile if i really think about it, or watch a movie that'll get to me or something, then i get depressed for awhile or something.. i dunno. and for him, i think as long as i have a job he is happy :P

[cnfuzzd]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Unless he thinks that you're the greatest thing in the world and would never think of getting emotionally envolved with someone else again, you deserve better.

[/ QUOTE ]
thanks for saying this, and i agree. this is where a lot of my problems use to come from, because he never made me feel that way. but when confronted on it, it was always about how he didn't mean to treat me bad, he just doesn't know how to be a good boyfriend, and how he sucks, etc. usually turning around to him needing the comfort :P but he is also emotionally-retarded (admittedly) and really hard to talk with sometimes about things, to really understand where he is at. it's like i have to talk for him. we both seem happier now, we don't have to have those talks. partly because things changed, and partly because some of those original problems (things that are problems for me, but not problems to him) are still there i just accept them now. i know he wants to be with me, and i can't see him cheating on me. but he likes me because i am cool, he likes who i am. not because he is insanely attracted to me. but i can't be hurt by that, because i feel the same towards him. we have a weird relationship.

[ QUOTE ]
Living together is hard. Always being faithful is hard, in some ways. You have to be really, really into each other for it to work out. If you really believe the above quote -- and understanding that I know nothing of this 7-year-relationship other than some of the snippets you've posted on here -- I suggest that you think seriously about whether you want to spend the rest of your life this way.

[/ QUOTE ]
i use to think about "do i want to spend the rest of my life this way" question a lot.. now not so much. though i can't say i am sure i want to be with him forever (the idea of marriage scares the crap out of me) i just know that even if i thought i needed something else, it is really difficult to imagine him not in my life because he is very important to me.

relationships are confusing ! for the most part we're happy though, it's only every once and awhile if i really think about it, or watch a movie that'll get to me or something, then i get depressed for awhile or something.. i dunno. and for him, i think as long as i have a job he is happy :P

[/ QUOTE ]

Im young and not commited and willing to put up with this blah blah blah...

so no more pics?

j/k, seriously, if you are happy with this dude, cool, just dont be dependent on him, especially after the hussy episode. Just enjoy the time you spend together, and when its time to duck out, dont fret about ditching him. (might i suggest next friday? Im free) You are waaaaaaaaay too young to even be thinking about long term commitment.

ok, i wasnt *really* kidding about the pics. Send em along anytime.

peace

john nickle

[gorie]

dear john nickle,

let's hump.

best,
carey

[cnfuzzd]

[ QUOTE ]
dear john nickle,

let's hump.

best,
carey

[/ QUOTE ]


totally...

peace

john nickle

[Jakesta]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
apple jacks!

[/ QUOTE ]

Excellent choice. I am eating them too.

[/ QUOTE ]

Lucky Charms are far superior.

[tbach24]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
apple jacks!

[/ QUOTE ]

Excellent choice. I am eating them too.

[/ QUOTE ]

Lucky Charms are far superior.

[/ QUOTE ]

Sugar Cereals:

CTC > Honey Nut Cheerio's > Froot Loops/Apple Jacks > Everything else.

[OtisTheMarsupial]

I have never cheated, but twice people have cheated on their significant others with me. Luckily, I've never been cheated on.

[gorie]

hmm. that got me thinking. i could never knowingly be the girl a guy was cheating on his girlfriend with. i know i just couldn't do that.

actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
I have never cheated, but twice people have cheated on their significant others with me. Luckily, I've never been cheated on.

[/ QUOTE ]
Did you know at the time that they were cheating with you? Did that affect things, or did you just go on with it like normal? Did you care? Who initiated the relationship - you or the cheater? Sorry for so many questions - I'm just curious. If you don't care to answer them, that's fine.

I've had girls break up with their boyfriends to go out with me and my wife had a few guys interested in her that I kind of swooped in ahead of to get her when I started dating her, but I never did anything with someone who wasn't single (aside from my sortakinda almost scenario described earlier).

[Dead]

[ QUOTE ]


actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Not a surprise.

[gorie]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]


actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Not a surprise.

[/ QUOTE ]
neither are you. wanna make out ?

[Dead]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]


actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Not a surprise.

[/ QUOTE ]
neither are you. wanna make out ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Nope

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]


actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Not a surprise.

[/ QUOTE ]
Not a surprise because of your little childish thing you have going on with gorie, or not a surprise because it's actually reasonable. I think I feel the same way she does. I'd feel terrible being the one that some woman cheated on her bf/husband with. Of course I'd feel terrible being the cheater too, but being the one she's cheating with would be just a bit worse - it's 1a and 1b for me.

[Dead]

Not a surprise for both reasons.

[Clarkmeister]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]


actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Not a surprise.

[/ QUOTE ]
neither are you. wanna make out ?

[/ QUOTE ]

And the score becomes more of a rout by the second.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
Not a surprise for both reasons.

[/ QUOTE ]
I see.

[durron597]

[ QUOTE ]
Not a surprise for both reasons.

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
*** You are ignoring this user ***

[/ QUOTE ]

[OtisTheMarsupial]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I have never cheated, but twice people have cheated on their significant others with me. Luckily, I've never been cheated on.

[/ QUOTE ]
Did you know at the time that they were cheating with you? Did that affect things, or did you just go on with it like normal? Did you care? Who initiated the relationship - you or the cheater?

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

The 1st one I didn't know we were cheating. When I found out, I broke it off. Yes, I cared.

The 2nd one I was drunk out of my mind and it was a one time thing. I felt horrible and we never saw each other again.

Both times the other person initiated. Also, both times I was far less mature than I am now. And like I said before, now that I am in a fantastic, committed relationship, I would never ever cheat.

[TimM]

[ QUOTE ]
I'd feel terrible being the one that some woman cheated on her bf/husband with.

[/ QUOTE ]

The last time I did this happened (and I really don't want to make a habit of it, it just happened), I worked with the girl for about a year beforehand. I knew she had a bf and she also smoked so I wasn't really interested in her.

Then, her bf started working with us, and at about the same time, she quit smoking. At this point I started to become more attracted to her, and got jealous seeing them together and was thinking that he doesn't deserve her, etc.

Their relationship seemed to be going downhill, probably not helped by their working together. At the same time, she and I were talking more and more. After a few months of this she invited me over one night. I felt bad about it, but I really didn't want to say no at that point, and I knew she was on the verge of dumping him anyway.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I have never cheated, but twice people have cheated on their significant others with me. Luckily, I've never been cheated on.

[/ QUOTE ]
Did you know at the time that they were cheating with you? Did that affect things, or did you just go on with it like normal? Did you care? Who initiated the relationship - you or the cheater?

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

The 1st one I didn't know we were cheating. When I found out, I broke it off. Yes, I cared.

The 2nd one I was drunk out of my mind and it was a one time thing. I felt horrible and we never saw each other again.

Both times the other person initiated. Also, both times I was far less mature than I am now. And like I said before, now that I am in a fantastic, committed relationship, I would never ever cheat.

[/ QUOTE ]
I'm sorry if my post came across like I was judging (the "did you care" part). I'm not - I was just curious.

[Pocket Trips]

I have actually been in this situation. Ended up falling in love with a married woman. Her husband was a truck driver who spent a lot of time on the road and as we spent more and more time together niether of us could deny our feelings for each other and we acted on them.

It was both the best and worst thing that ever happened to me. We were deeply in love and I have never felt that way about a woman before or since. But we were both kidding ourselves since we both knew we could never be together.

She was married with 2 kids and I was in no position to even think about supporting her and them, plus i could not live with being the reason she left her husband. She would always resent me for being the person responsible for breaking up her family. It would've been easier if he was a horrible guy but he was just on the road a lot which left her lonely, not exactly a crime by him.

Also its amazing how stupid I felt when he would come home and she spent the night with him. I mean how could i get jealous? he was her husband! yet i still felt horrible.

I eventually broke it off because even though she was the smartest and sexiest woman i have ever been with, I deserve to have a relationship with someone like that I don't have to share with someone else.

So Gorie you are very right when you said you would rather cheat than be the cheatee... At least if you heat you can correct the situation by either stopping cheating or breaking up with your b/f

[kerssens]

Maybe I misread but I think she was saying that she wouldn't want to be the cheater.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
Maybe I misread but I think she was saying that she wouldn't want to be the cheater.

[/ QUOTE ]
I'm pretty sure she said she doesn't want to be the third person who the husband was cheating with. So... yeah, I guess I'm backing you up.

[Pocket Trips]

you missed.. it happens... can't read every post in OOT or you'd be no better than Dead /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[ QUOTE ]
hmm. that got me thinking. i could never knowingly be the girl a guy was cheating on his girlfriend with. i know i just couldn't do that.

actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

[kerssens]

[ QUOTE ]
you missed.. it happens... can't read every post in OOT or you'd be no better than Dead /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[ QUOTE ]
hmm. that got me thinking. i could never knowingly be the girl a guy was cheating on his girlfriend with. i know i just couldn't do that.

actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, I didn't display my reading comprehension very well there...what Patrick said is what I was trying to say and I'm sure you're story jived with the whole point so I just created a little unnecessary confusion.

[gorie]

[ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
hmm. that got me thinking. i could never knowingly be the girl a guy was cheating on his girlfriend with. i know i just couldn't do that.

actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, I didn't display my reading comprehension very well there...what Patrick said is what I was trying to say and I'm sure you're story jived with the whole point so I just created a little unnecessary confusion.

[/ QUOTE ]

just to be clear, (since i was only trying to make a point of not wanting to be the 3rd person involved) i can't really see myself cheating either. so when i say i would "rather cheat than do that" i don't mean to make it sound like cheating is not a big deal to me. i think it's terrible - i try to be an honest person, and i wouldn't want to hurt someone i cared about like that.

but at least with cheating, if i were the one to cheat on a boyfriend - for me to even consider it would mean that things would have to be messed up pretty good to even get to that point. like at least i could know the person i was hurting was me/him by choice and know my reasons.

though i'm sure it is all situational, and i can't really judge someone who chooses to involve themselves in anothers relationship. i just meant it was something that i personally couldn't do, and can't think of any reason i'd need/want to... i dunno.

[cnfuzzd]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
hmm. that got me thinking. i could never knowingly be the girl a guy was cheating on his girlfriend with. i know i just couldn't do that.

actually, i think i'd rather cheat than do that. how messed up is that ?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, I didn't display my reading comprehension very well there...what Patrick said is what I was trying to say and I'm sure you're story jived with the whole point so I just created a little unnecessary confusion.

[/ QUOTE ]

just to be clear, (since i was only trying to make a point of not wanting to be the 3rd person involved) i can't really see myself cheating either. so when i say i would "rather cheat than do that" i don't mean to make it sound like cheating is not a big deal to me. i think it's terrible - i try to be an honest person, and i wouldn't want to hurt someone i cared about like that.

but at least with cheating, if i were the one to cheat on a boyfriend - for me to even consider it would mean that things would have to be messed up pretty good to even get to that point. like at least i could know the person i was hurting was me/him by choice and know my reasons.

though i'm sure it is all situational, and i can't really judge someone who chooses to involve themselves in anothers relationship. i just meant it was something that i personally couldn't do, and can't think of any reason i'd need/want to... i dunno.

[/ QUOTE ]

but we can still hump, right?

peace

john nickle