Ego has no place in (winning) poker

[JKDStudent]

I've been playing online since the end of December, and with the help of bonuses have been building my bankroll slowly but surely. Now that the semester is over, I plan on putting a lot more time into it. However, I've noticed a problem with my game. While after 5,000 hands, I'm at 3.78BB/100 at .50/1, at 1/2 I'm at -1/100 after 8,500 hands. The number was closer to -1.6/100 about a week ago. Note that all of the 1/2 hands have been played at the Crypto sites while doing bonuses.

For a long time, I blamed the losses at 1/2 on my first major downswing, and I blamed that downswing on being on tilt. However, I have never made it into the positive after that downswing. Also, at the beginning of this month, I suffered another downswing, and tilt was not a factor. I realized that at the Crypto sites, my play was accomplishing the exact opposite of what I wanted: I was winning a lot of small pots (stealing a lot of blinds, and winning pots no larger than 3-4BB), but when I lost, it was huge (the pot itself could be 15BB, and I contributed 1/3 of it). Well, that was the result, but what was the cause?

Ego. I was not playing for the money, I was playing for the pots. If I tried to steal a blind and a guy played back at me, it wasn't about cards or the miniscule amount of money in the pot. It was just about me beating him. I wasn't going to let him bully me around, and I was going to make him fold with my king-high. What was the result? Well, with the weak-tight Crypto crowd, I was winning a LOT of small pots. But my ego would get the best of me, and whenever the opponents actually had a hand, I was spewing like college freshman.

It wasn't just blind steals, mind you. Let's say I picked up AQs from MP and came in for a raise and had two callers. An ace hit, and there was a lot of aggression. To any other player, it would be obvious that I was behind. Be it two-pair, a set, or whatever, I was not in the lead in the hand. Ego, though, did not want to hear it. Ego said, "Uh uh. AQ is a damned good hand, and there's no way you should lose with it. Keep putting money into that pot. Make them fold. MAKE THEM PAY!" Yeah... essentially, I was becoming the exact player that we all want to play against. Granted, I wasn't playing more hands than I should, but I was getting carried away with the hands I did play.

Well, that's changed. If I defend a blind but the flop has nothing to do with my cards, that 1.5BB in the pot isn't worth a pissing contest. Ok, so I'm in the BB with K3o. Flop comes Q-high with two to a flush, and it gets checked through five players. Turn comes with a 3 and I get bet into. The pot is only 3BB. There's no reason to fight over that one. Or if I have AK in EP, raise, and get four callers, I don't feel the need to bet out on the flop if it's missed me completely. Calling a bet w/ overs and a backdoor, sure, but betting out in that situation is just ego saying, "Hey, you raised PF and you have AK! You HAVE to bet the flop, NO MATTER WHAT!"

I don't necessarily know that there's a point to all this rambling, except to talk about a psychological leak. Since I've figured out the problem, I've watched that red number next to 1/2 get smaller and smaller. Is part of it variance? Of course. But I feel that a bigger part is finally understanding that ego has no place in winning poker. Now I'm calmer when playing and minimizing my losses while focusing on the bigger pots.

I really thought this post would be far better than it has turned out. For that, you have my apologies. But I already typed it up, so it's going up regardless. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Al Schoonmaker]

Thank you for an excellent post. You seem young, and you're playing for tiny stakes, but you have correctly identified a leak that some players NEVER recognize.

In addition to identifying a specific leak, you have shown that you are self-critical. You looked at your data and made some correct inferences from them. Many people can't do it.

As many readers know, denial is one of my favorite subjects, and you have shown the opposite characteristic: open-mindedness.

Keep it up and you will become a better player and person.

Regards,

Al

[etgryphon]

I have this same problem.

I hate to be bullied and I tend to think of only the times that people have been bluffing with garbage.

This is why two of my hands that have lost the most are: AQ and KK

I also need to work on my TPTK hands. I don't have the right mental state yet to make these profitable.

-Gryph

[poker-penguin]

Nice post. I had / have a similar problem. Heck, I think everyone apart from a few gurus has some sort of ego problem

Mine is people not laying down hands when I come out firing - dammit I'm an eagle, you have to fold when I check raise you with trash.

The secret to beating weak tighties (although some crypto players are maniacs) is, as you've learned, learning when to back off.

I hate folding mid pot, always have, probably always will. Thankfully I hate losing money and looking like an idiot even more than I hate folding.

Mike Caro has a good article about how poker is about winning money, not pots. I re-read it every couple of weeks when I find myself getting too worked up about "making that ***er fold".

[psyduck]

excellent post. I too have this very same problem. I thought that I had fully received everything that SSHE could teach me, but I haven't. Ego really does get in the way of progress.