Small school dilemma

[Popinjay]

so I'm sitting in class today while the professor is lecturing and this sort of ugly chick turns to me and makes a "funny" (in quotes because i'm sure she thought it was, i did not) comment about something he said. now i really didn't like this because i quite dislike it when people talk when the prof is talking (small class too).

so here's where i'm faced with the dilemma. it would be kind of awkward and kind of rude to just say nothing but i definitely don't want to say something back and risk further commentary. so instead i flashed her a smile and said nothing. in retrospect i am not too sure this was the best route as it has possibly promoted the prospect of this happening again in the future.

did i play it right or not? how does my play change if this is a hot chick?

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

uhh... stick it in her pooper?

[pshreck]

Ya played it the only way you can. You can add some sarcasm to the smile (maybe by raising your eyes) to hint a little that you dont agree.

[fluxrad]

I play this the same way.

If it's a hot chick, you are probably best here. Tend to raise.

[Dead]

I really wonder how some people on this forum manage to function in real life.

Far be it from me to comment on useless posts, but some of this stuff is just common sense.

[PoBoy321]

I hate to say it, but I completely agree with Dead.

If this is a difficult social situation, how do you not drool all over yourself all day?

[Popinjay]

[ QUOTE ]
I hate to say it, but I completely agree with Dead.

If this is a difficult social situation, how do you not drool all over yourself all day?

[/ QUOTE ]

no i don't drool. say if i see a professor on campus out of class and a conversation seems imminent or say i accidently brush up against a chick and she looks at me, in both of these situations i run away and/or scream according to the magntitude of the moment

[Dead]

I'll elaborate.

Does it really matter what you do? You've already determined that she is ugly and so you have no interest in her.

Why not just ignore her?

Or talk to her if you want and get in trouble when the professor yells at you for doing it.

Or just smile. Maybe you should frown. Why doesn't someone calculate the EV for all of these situations?

[PoBoy321]

[ QUOTE ]
in both of these situations i run away and/or scream according to the magntitude of the moment

[/ QUOTE ]

Ignore my first post. This seems reasonable.

[Dead]

Girls aren't gods, you know.

And shyness doesn't impress most of them, unless they are shy themselves.

Just be outgoing with them. If you bump into one, just say I'm sorry and look sheepish.

[ethan]

Turn your head slightly towards her, raise an eyebrow, pause, turn back to the front and smirk. If done right you've just been dismissive, patronizing, and made her feel awkward while at the same time looking like you're laughing with her. She'll never speak to you again.

Or you could just do what you did but worry less about it.

[istewart]

The correct play is to do Adam Sandler's Borophyll play from Billy Madison.

[J_V]

It's not difficult. It's a curious situation - you [censored] losers.

[willie]

if it's a hot chick, my default play is to giggle like mad and begin groping her boobs.



if it's a fatty i simply say "shut up stupid you're sweating"

[Dead]

[ QUOTE ]
The correct play is to do Adam Sandler's Borophyll play from Billy Madison.

[/ QUOTE ]

I just spit iced tea all over my keyboard. Now, pshreck might attribute this to the fact that I am a retard, but I think it's because that comment was hella funny and original.

[PoBoy321]

How is it even a curious situation? An ugly girl makes an awkward comment in the middle of a class. What's so curious about this situation? You either smile, or ignore her. It's not difficult, it's not curious, it's something that normal people deal with every day.

[istewart]

Okay, here's one. I was a bit confused; this happened a few weeks ago before finals.

This girl I know tells me, at 5:00, to meet her in the lounge at 7:30ish to study. At 7:30 I go up and see her books and bag strewn across a desk, but she's not there. So I sit down and begin going through her notes.

A few minutes later this chick comes in, stops behind my shoulder, and says "what the [censored] are you doing?" It's her stuff, and I've never seen her before. She looks really pissed.

Description of girl:

She's got big breasts, she's fairly hot, she's definitely a JAP, she probably drives a Mercedes, and she's short.

Give me turn and river lines to make up for my lack of a flop 3-bet.

[ethan]

Whatever you do, try to work the following joke into the conversation:

You: "I just met this girl...I'm absolutely nuts over her."
Her: "Oh?"
You: "Yea...she's like 3 feet tall."

Once she gets it, she'll forget all about you going through her notes.

[fluxrad]

[ QUOTE ]
Whatever you do, try to work the following joke into the conversation:

You: "I just met this girl...I'm absolutely nuts over her."
Her: "Oh?"
You: "Yea...she's like 3 feet tall."

Once she gets it, she'll forget all about you going through her notes.

[/ QUOTE ]

ror.

[willie]

[ QUOTE ]


Give me turn and river lines to make up for my lack of a flop 3-bet.

[/ QUOTE ]

well my normal line in this scenario

is to whip it out and JO on her notebook while screaming "What does it look like JAPPY!?!"

[Popinjay]

yell back at her "Who are you and what have you done with Katie!" (or whatever the other girl's name was)

actually that is a really sh.tty route. but it's hilarious to you and there is a small chance that you are somehow living in a truman show type of thing and it just got a lot of laughs from the viewers

[istewart]

[ QUOTE ]
yell back at her "Who are you and what have you done with Katie!" (or whatever the other girl's name was)

actually that is a really sh.tty route. but it's hilarious to you and there is a small chance that you are somehow living in a truman show type of thing and it just got a lot of laughs from the viewers

[/ QUOTE ]

hahahahaha

[ethan]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Whatever you do, try to work the following joke into the conversation:

You: "I just met this girl...I'm absolutely nuts over her."
Her: "Oh?"
You: "Yea...she's like 3 feet tall."

Once she gets it, she'll forget all about you going through her notes.

[/ QUOTE ]

ror.

[/ QUOTE ]

It's probably funnier if you imagine it coming from Bob Saget, since that's where I heard it.

[fluxrad]

I gotta say, Bob Saget is the weirdest goddamned commedian of all time. I saw his routine once on like HBO back in the day (some small club) and was just floored at how much profanity was coming from his mouth. The contrast between that routine and Full House was just unbelievable.

That being said...he was pretty damned funny.

[ethan]

article (http://www.observer.com/pages/frontpage8.asp)
[ QUOTE ]

In comedy circles, there’s a famous Saget story about the night his first daughter was born. After a very difficult birth, during which Sherri Saget and her baby almost died, a friend showed up to find Mr. Saget looking utterly destroyed, unshaven, unrecognizable, but holding his newborn.

“Oh my God, Bob, she’s beautiful,” the friend said.

“For a dollar, you can finger her,” Mr. Saget replied.


[/ QUOTE ]

[DemonDeac]

[ QUOTE ]
article (http://www.observer.com/pages/frontpage8.asp)
[ QUOTE ]

In comedy circles, there’s a famous Saget story about the night his first daughter was born. After a very difficult birth, during which Sherri Saget and her baby almost died, a friend showed up to find Mr. Saget looking utterly destroyed, unshaven, unrecognizable, but holding his newborn.

“Oh my God, Bob, she’s beautiful,” the friend said.

“For a dollar, you can finger her,” Mr. Saget replied.


[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

but then in the end, they all talked it out with soft music playing in the background and hugged each other knowing they just learned a life lesson, you dont let someone finger your wife for a dollar

THANKS FULL HOUSE!!!

[Dead]

His baby, not his wife.

That is quite disturbing if true.

[DemonDeac]

yea
real f'in disturbing
no wonder Mary Kate Olson had an eating disorder

[ethan]

[ QUOTE ]
His baby, not his wife.

That is quite disturbing if true.

[/ QUOTE ]

Penn and Teller put together a movie called 'The Aristocrats', which is about a famous joke. The point of the joke is to be as offensive as possible - the basic pretext is the same in every telling, but the middle section is ad-libbed. The article I linked claims that Saget told the most obscene version of the 100 or so P&T filmed.

For reference, here's a .wmv link (http://www.spschat.com/RareMedia/videos/southparkjoke-thearistocrats.wmv) to the South Park rendition of the joke. (Warning. It's really, really offensive. Really.)

edit - this joke has been known to go on for 20-30 minutes. The only required parts are that it's a family going to a talent agency and that it ends with "The Aristocrats".

[fluxrad]

Ahhh, thanks. That reminded me to watch The Aristocrats (http://www.somefoolwitha.com/2004/06/09/the-aristocrats-south-park/) as done by Trey Parker.

Second time I've seen it.

I laughed so hard I cried.

Window seat please.

[ethan]

My roommate's girlfriend works in public relations, which means he gets to go to press screenings from time to time. He went to The Aristocrats maybe 6-8 weeks ago, and said it was everything you'd hope it would be.