The world is a bitch

[augie00]

So here's the scoop. My roommate is nothing but annoying and stupid. He's also got bitch tits, a beer belly, hair all over his body, this stupid annoying laugh, a small penis, and this stupid speech impediment that makes him talk really fast and studder. He's the messiest person I've ever met, he leaves all his [censored] everywhere, his desk is one huge pile of books/papers/dirty clothes/all the random [censored] that he couldn't CRAM in his side of the closet. In short, I hate my roommate. I will give him credit for being a nice guy though.

But then there's this hot chick who thinks he's good looking, funny, and smart. He's probably nailing her. She always comes over. You don't have to call me on it, cause of course I'm jealous.

Why is life so unfair?

[private joker]

[ QUOTE ]
He's also got ... a small penis

[/ QUOTE ]

You shouldn't know this.

[augie00]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
He's also got ... a small penis

[/ QUOTE ]

You shouldn't know this.

[/ QUOTE ]


Why not? I've lived with the man for quite a while now. Him and some other douchebags were playing "strip-mario kart" with said hot chick and her friend.

[SmileyEH]

Rub $100 bills all over yourself. It will make you feel better.

-SmileyEH

[KDawgCometh]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
He's also got ... a small penis

[/ QUOTE ]

You shouldn't know this.

[/ QUOTE ]

yeah, this is info we really don't need to know. where's Jasont with his care bear picture when you need it

[sublime]

You shouldn't know this.

if he lived with me he would. i walk around naked all the time.

[shant]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
He's also got ... a small penis

[/ QUOTE ]

You shouldn't know this.

[/ QUOTE ]


Why not? I've lived with the man for quite a while now. Him and some other douchebags were playing "strip-mario kart" with said hot chick and her friend.

[/ QUOTE ]
I've lived with my current roomate for almost 5 years now. I have no idea what size his penis is.

[jason_t]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
He's also got ... a small penis

[/ QUOTE ]

You shouldn't know this.

[/ QUOTE ]

yeah, this is info we really don't need to know. where's Jasont with his care bear picture when you need it

[/ QUOTE ]

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y73/jason_t712/bear.jpg

[thatpfunk]

[ QUOTE ]

I've lived with my current roomate for almost 5 years now. I have no idea what size his penis is.

[/ QUOTE ]

How?

[istewart]

Popping up out of nowhere was so Dead-like, but the picture is worth it. NH.

[istewart]

augie, the problem might lie in the fact that she likes white men with good dental care. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[augie00]

Ok, but I bet your roommate has never played a game of "strip mario kart" with three other guys, taken a picture, and showed it to you. Then, you would know how bit it was. Enough of these shananagins, on with the discussion.

[gamblore99]

Is it possible he is good looking, funny, and smart and you are just to jealous to see these qualities?

[shant]

[ QUOTE ]
Ok, but I bet your roommate has never played a game of "strip mario kart" with three other guys, taken a picture, and showed it to you. Then, you would know how bit it was. Enough of these shananagins, on with the discussion.

[/ QUOTE ]
OK, fair enough. As for your original post, your thread title sums up my thoughts on the situation.

[Sponger15SB]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

I've lived with my current roomate for almost 5 years now. I have no idea what size his penis is.

[/ QUOTE ]

How?

[/ QUOTE ]

Probably because he has never seen it?

[tech]

[ QUOTE ]
Ok, but I bet your roommate has never played a game of "strip mario kart" with three other guys, taken a picture, and showed it to you.

[/ QUOTE ]

??? You are correct. In fact I am quite confident that no dude has ever shown me a naked picture of himself, particularly with other naked dudes.

[augie00]

[ QUOTE ]
Is it possible he is good looking, funny, and smart and you are just to jealous to see these qualities?

[/ QUOTE ]

No.

[KDawgCometh]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
He's also got ... a small penis

[/ QUOTE ]

You shouldn't know this.

[/ QUOTE ]

yeah, this is info we really don't need to know. where's Jasont with his care bear picture when you need it

[/ QUOTE ]

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y73/jason_t712/bear.jpg

[/ QUOTE ]

this picture never gets old. thanks jason

[Stuey]

warning! I am currently doing fat chicks. They are much nicer people and very thankful souls.

[ QUOTE ]


Quote:
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Is it possible he is good looking, funny, and smart and you are just to jealous to see these qualities?


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No.

[/ QUOTE ]

I believe you.

Girls like action and attention. This dude sounds like a idiot. But he seems to know how to have fun. He keeps the girl excited, entertained. Lots of chicks don't care much what a guy looks like. They are so into themselves all they want is attention.

I use to live my entire life based on how it would help me get laid. It worked and I am no catch. I struck out more than I scored but I swung nonstop! I use to work sooo hard at it and I would always find a weak one.

So then you get a hot girl liking you, great. The sex is great but then you have to put up with her. Sure she looks hot and it will be fun for awhile but you will get bored of her. She will be shallow and self absorbed.

These women are HIGH maintance! You have to reasure them constantly, they are very insecure. So you have this good looking peice of ass that is self centered, shallow, inmature, and requires constant attention. Even if she is older than you what you got here is a child.

And yah there are good looking ones that are normal but try and trick one of them into the sack. Sure it can be done with enough effort but she won't keep you around for long. /images/graemlins/ooo.gif

I am currently doing fat chicks. They are much nicer people and very thankful souls.

[jason_t]

[ QUOTE ]
Popping up out of nowhere was so Dead-like, but the picture is worth it. NH.

[/ QUOTE ]

If you ever compare me to Dead again you will be dead.

[JaBlue]

[ QUOTE ]


I am currently doing fat chicks. They are much nicer people and very thankful souls.

[/ QUOTE ]

if you had just put this at the front of your post I would have known not to read it

[Stuey]

[ QUOTE ]
Quote:
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I am currently doing fat chicks. They are much nicer people and very thankful souls.


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if you had just put this at the front of your post I would have known not to read it

[/ QUOTE ]

fixed it for the next guy

[mmbt0ne]

Calm down. The world isn't really a bitch until you come home and see them christening your sex chair.

[jason_t]

[ QUOTE ]
Calm down. The world isn't really a bitch until you come home and see them christening your sex chair.

[/ QUOTE ]

If it's your sex chair, you must have already used it. So they can't be using it for the first time so you must mean they are naming it. What's the big deal?

[Matty]

[ QUOTE ]
of course I'm jealous.

[/ QUOTE ]If this is a common dilemma of yours, perhaps you should look into sexual reassignment surgery.

But there are a lot of straight-acting gay guys out there who would love you for who you are. Tons of fish in the sea. Cheer up bucko.

[Jazza]

put a blanket over his head and then rape him. savagely.

[jakethebake]

Try showing her your new sex chair and I';m sure she'll be yours. If that doesn't work, point out how much larger your penis is than your roommates'.

On a side note, he was losing strip-mario-kart to a girl?

[beerbandit]

for a second i thought i was your roomate until you mentioned the hot chick part

[augie00]

thanks for all the replies so far! here are some comments!

[ QUOTE ]
I am currently doing fat chicks. They are much nicer people and very thankful souls

[/ QUOTE ]

This might qualify as post of the century

[ QUOTE ]
Calm down. The world isn't really a bitch until you come home and see them christening your sex chair.

[/ QUOTE ]

If that happens I might have to choke a bitch

[ QUOTE ]
put a blanket over his head and then rape him. savagely.


[/ QUOTE ]

he does sleep a lot...

[ QUOTE ]
Try showing her your new sex chair and I';m sure she'll be yours.

[/ QUOTE ]

yeah, well, my roommate has this cool habit of INVITING PEOPLE UP TO MY ROOM TO SHOW THEM MY CHAIR LIKE IT'S HIS CHAIR so believe me, she's already sat in it. in fact, the first time she did, she mentioned that it's better than sex

[ QUOTE ]
If that doesn't work, point out how much larger your penis is than your roommates'.


[/ QUOTE ]

this may be the only thing to save me now

[ QUOTE ]
On a side note, he was losing strip-mario-kart to a girl?


[/ QUOTE ]

he got completley owned. the picture is three dudes, completley naked, and two chicks in bras and shorts. maybe the girls put on clothes for the picture; i didn't ask any questions, my roommate showed me the picture, i punched him in the arm, and told him i was going to kill him.

[daryn]

this is easy.

girls are not as superficial as guys on a whole. they don't care about a guy's penis, or if he is the best looking guy around. they just don't care. it really is all about personality.

[Sponger15SB]

[ QUOTE ]
this is easy.

girls are not as superficial as guys on a whole. they don't care about a guy's penis, or if he is the best looking guy around. they just don't care. it really is all about personality.

[/ QUOTE ]

Phew, thanks for clearing that one up. For a second there I thought life was unfair.

[Dex]

[ QUOTE ]
augie, the problem might lie in the fact that his penis is bigger than yours. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Fixed your post. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[augie00]

cuntrag

[Hoopster81]

[ QUOTE ]
playing "strip-mario kart" with said hot chick and her friend.

[/ QUOTE ]

That is GOLD. Face it - your roommate is a pimp and you just can't get out from his shadow.