Poker haiku

[the shadow]

Man, what's with all the haiku? With just a little looking, I found some great ones out there. Here're a few of my favs.

ChrisV:

Wind stirs the blossoms
With eight or less blinds preflop
Move allin or fold.

ColdestCall:

Two all-ins pre-flop.
Should I fold my rockets here?
I have no scrotum.

Many poker hands
have more than one way to play.
People need to chill.

With many cold calls
Top pair, top kicker no good.
Don't blow your stack here.

rory:

Late frost burns the bloom
Does a fool defend his blind
With unsuited trash?

Bob Ciaffone:

Bet Bet Bet Bet Bet
Better Than Slowplaying Hands
What an Easy Game!

If you flop the nuts
And it's checked around to you
You should bet it out

parttimepro:

Tree grows where seed lands
Playing Ace Seven offsuit
Root of all error.

irisheyes:

Ace and King offsuit
Few callers, but I won't limp
Less chance of suck out

young nut:

Fish at the table
Must relieve them of their cash
As quick as I'm able.

And thanks to google:

I see an orange
Lying on a poker table
Johnny Chan is here

Wow, mid connectors
Please, just give me a flop, please
[censored], maybe I bluff

Why did I call him
With middle pair, no kicker?
It was not a bluff.

Flopped a straight-flush draw
so many outs, but of course
a pair of twos wins

This hand will raise now.
There is no I who does this;
The cards themselves act

[The Yugoslavian]

This post of shadow
I cannot see more clearly
As his best post ever.

Spring sun overhead
Shadows abound all around
Bask in the haiku.

El D would approve
With a poem of reknown
But not here, not now.

Aleo is back
To put us all at our ease,
Where is my spreadsheet?!

Yugoslav
Who has never written one of these awkward thingies b4...

[GrekeHaus]

I call with pot odds
Brilliant in my opinion
four five offsuit wins!

[The Yugoslavian]

[ QUOTE ]
<font color="red"> Value call my nuts </font>
Brilliant in my opinion
<font color="red"> King Jack NOT suited! </font>

[/ QUOTE ]

Couldn't help it...

Yugoslav

[eastbay]

Folding here is fine
Smarter, though, to bet all-in
Those blinds are juicy

eastbay

[Apathy]

Nice post... Heres mine about a cash game played a month or so ago.

I flop bottom set
All-in, uh oh, theres the nuts
can I river quads?

-Apathy

[mackthefork]

[ QUOTE ]
I call with pot odds
Brilliant in my opinion
four five offsuit wins!



[/ QUOTE ]

I curse this forum
Haiku bad beats posted here
People never learn

/images/graemlins/mad.gif /images/graemlins/grin.gif /images/graemlins/wink.gif

Just kidding Mack

[Apathy]

From a recent thread

Another Apathy Haiku:

Do not play for first
Or to finish in-the-money
listen: PROFIT BITCH!

-Apathy

[Geordie Ramone]

Long time lurker
I know my results are unsustainable
sample size too small

[dfscott]

Limit grind wears thin
I search for greener pastures
SnGs, I'm home!

[Scuba Chuck]

BisonBison please
Review your hand history
EZ for to read

[ColdestCall]

LOL - posted this in another thread today b4 stumbling upon this one, but I guess is makes more sense here (particularly since someone had like 12 syllables in the second line of one of these....)

Take five syllables
Next add a line of seven
Five more makes haiku.

and, while I'm at it...

Limping pokcet pairs
EP in the fifty-fives
Is overrated.

-Coldest Call
who started doing this haiku thing as an attention getting ploy after a number of serious posts were roundly ignored...


and, what the heck, while I'm here....

Tight till level four
Then start pushing your chips in
What an easy game.

When I am first in,
The other guy isn't sure
That I have nothing.

and

The pain increases
Another big hand busted
I should drink more beer.

[the shadow]

Clarkmeister:

Never fold headsup
Especially with a pair
Often one pair wins

[Costanza]

Pocket kings: reraise!
Respect my authority!
Oh... you have aces.

[tomdemaine]

can I get rakeback?
I want to cheat poker sites.
Oh why am i banned


I have a great plan
to beat roulette, just bet red
over and over.

[the shadow]

Some more, from RGP, courtesy of Google:

slamster:

the Way of Poker
is simply to play the game
not to win or lose

the cards do not care
What happens: flop, turn, river
push the chips. next hand


gmr:

ace and king of spades
fantastic, I flopped two pair!
oh no! running flush!


Eleaticus:

me pocket-rockets
and small blind 5-2 offsuit
the poker gods chuckle


Saint Cad:

aces in the hand
sitting at a tight table
only buys the blinds


DP75089:

my kings are beaten
it cannot be my playing
on-line poker cheats


Perry Friedman:

Omaha hi/lo
Unfuckingbelievable
I'm rivered again


Doctor K:

Pocket Aces. Cracked.
He flopped a straight with deuce-five.
Nice hand, sir. Well played.


Terrence Chan:

Discipline like monk
Skillful with game selection
Adequate bankroll


Dan Kimberg:

It takes more to play
poker than I can express
in twenty-five words


Karlon West:

The fish want to call
The fish do not want to fold
Make them call, get rich


Mr. Bob:

a haiku on poker
more precise term is needed
i suggest poku


anonymous:

money you don't lose
matters more in the long run
than money you win

good holdem players
must remain aggressive. oops,
ran into aces