One liners to call poker as a profession

[kurosh]

Got some good ones? Saw this on IRC and thought it was interesting. I'm borrowing these:

B_Dids:"I take money from stupid people"
khole:"I'm a participant in pure capitalism"

[jakethebake]

http://us.news2.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/p/ap/20050223/capt.nyet25602231617.manure_pile_nyet256.jpg

[zaxx19]

I peddle nuts 56 tables at a time.

[Gin 'n Tonic]

I’m a nut flusher

I fill houses from the river

I deal in nut futures

Knight of the pwned table

[fsuplayer]

i work with retards.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
i work with retarts.

[/ QUOTE ]

fixed your post, moran.

[The once and future king]

I import foreign currency in bulk.

[Gamblor]

psychology and statistics analyst

[Victor]

im retired

im small stakes daytrader

expectation value analyst

[Daliman]

I'm in short term investments. VERY short term.

[kurosh]

I thought of one.

"I help compulsive gamblers with their addiction"

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
I thought of one.

"I help compulsive gamblers with their addiction"

[/ QUOTE ]

How about just "I work with compulsive gamblers".

[kurosh]

"I clean fish tanks"

[Bulbarainey]

"I buy and sell chances"

[Shilly]

Not my idea, but "fisherman."

[TimTimSalabim]

People pay me to show them my nuts.

[JTrout]

I'm a pigeon plucker.

[Jazza]

I'm an entertainer

[EliteNinja]

I'm a starving musician/squeegie-kid.

[BreakEvenPlayer]

One-eyed purple yogurt slinger.

[tac252]

I flop my nuts on a felt table while fish stuff money in my rack.

That one gets alllll the chicks.

[broodwitch]

i stack instead of trying to be fly