Uncomfortable situation -- Being nice at the table.

This is something that has come up more than a couple of times in my poker playing days and wanted to get everyone's opinion. I am usually a chatty player, and often engage in some pleasent conversation with the players around me.

Sometimes I annoy players near me, but thats another topic. Anyhow, often when someone has position on me and they have the nuts, they will only call me. For example, I have the nut flush, and the end pairs the board. I bet, player who clearly know better just calls his full house.

I am pretty sure that they are doing this because I struck up a friendly conversation with them(or they with I), but it makes me very uncomfortable. I have yet to be in a situation where a player had given me this "gift" and I have been in a situation to return it, but I don't think I would. I like bsing with people at the table, especially when playing a tight game and not seeing many flops, but when a player does this I almost want to hand him a big bet and tell him to raise me next time. After all, I enjoy the game and my objective is to do as well as possible at it.

Have you ever saved someone a bet intentionally? Have you ever been the recipient of a big bet gift? How did it make you feel?

Huh?

[PokerBabe(aka)]

Well....it's ok to be nice, but not ok to cost yourself money. I once had a (very strong) player in a 30-60 game bet in the dark when he made a full house so I would know to fold my hand. /forums/images/icons/smile.gif I have on several occassions not raised the river vs. a player who was badly stuck. I wrote a post about something similar called "the Sympathy fold", where I didn't call vs. a pal who was stuck in a 10-20 game. I simply didnt' want to beat him. /forums/images/icons/ooo.gif In general, I think this is bad poker. If you have the best of it, you should play accordingly. LGPG, Babe

I would consider asking the person "why didn't you raise?". Then you could politely make it clear that you WOULD raise in that spot.

You're right that is bad poker (although otherwise very nice). If you feel bad about winning your pal's money you're better off just quitting the game. Better to just LG and not play then to LGPB.

[Herb N.]

No NO NO Don't ask him why he didnt raise[teaching].If you say anything say something like:I owe you one.You dont want to imbaress that player.Keep the game friendly like your doing.I get this once and a while too,while I do feel like saying something{or kissing the girl}who said "I know I should have raised but your SO nice"I know I'm doing my job keeping the game friendly[good].Thier is a post below this one dealing with just the opposite. /forums/images/icons/smile.gif

[bernie]

separate your game from your pleasantries.

ive recieved the 'gift'. but the player realizes later that i dont give those gifts. i dont like soft play. i think its crap. unless im on the receiving end of it /forums/images/icons/grin.gif some regulars i play with ive seen them expecting me to give them a freebie, then i bet into them. they dont get mad usually, and they shouldnt. you didnt ask them to softplay you. but it does tend to build a little more respect for your game i think.

it can also have the affect of forcing them out of their comfort zone and into playing a way theyre not accustomed to. i hate it when i see 3 'buddies' check it down from the flop, but then hard play others that they dont 'know'. ive seen this happen too many times including to myself way back, so i said [censored] em.... i hard play everyone. no favorites.

do i feel bad about not reciprocating? absolutely not. im not obligated to return something i didnt ask for. maybe a name for those that expect the same could be the 'hare krishnas' of the table.

b

[bernie]

do you want them to charge you extra? nothing can be gained by informing them of 'why' you wouldve raised and that they shouldve. let them save you all the bets you can. your not there to teach, your there to win chips.

b

[brad]

if you have a range of limits i think its ok to sort of softplay at the lowest limits because everybody plays bad anyway and you make your money off of big family pots anyway, but always remember when you do this to only do it when it will cost you a fraction of a bet at most.

as to not being comfortable i dont see why youre not. actually the real benefit comes when you softplay a little tiny bit (every once in a while give up a fraction of a bet (did guy with full house have bottom full house against someone he knows is a very tight player perhaps?) ) and then certain people (especially the chatty ones) are like literally 10x easier to read. so think about that when you think youre getting something for free.


brad

You shouldn't be nice at the table. I am never nice and occasionally yell at others just to take them off of there game. Try it some time.be as unpleasant as you can be without really distorting the game.At poker tables nice guys finish second. I am never nice at cards or golf

I think your attitude is misdirected Jerry. If yelling at players works for you then go ahead, but I think it annoys all and the weak players may start playing better against you. I have no problem betting into or raising a person who has slowplayed me in the past b/c I make a percentage of my income from poker so I can not afford to be that nice and the point is to win the chips though I don't disrespect my opponents.. nick