Pocket Kings= worst hand ever, help me please understand poker!!!

[ThaSaltCracka]

okay, so I just started playing poker today. I took $50 out of my bank account and deposited it on Party Poker because thats where the fish are, right?

anyways, so I look around for a table, I have no clue what to play so I decided on a $1/$2 table, after all I am bankrolled for this game.

So I sit down and luckily I am to the right of the little red marker, whatever that means. So I am sitting there watching people play, wow this is exciting, just like TV. Okay some thing is prompting me to do something, wtf??? Oh post a blind, why though I am behind the damn red thing. GRRRRRR!!!! FINE FUC[/b]K YOU PARTY I'LL PAY. SO get to play my first hand, EL YEAH! so I am watching the cards fly around, fun. Well I was dealt crap so I fold and watch the rest of the hand, these people all suck. I fold for a while and a while(damn where are the pocket Ace's, Hellmuth says only play those). Whats this, K /images/graemlins/spade.gif K /images/graemlins/heart.gif, okay, well this isn't Aces, but I guess it works.

I am two to the right of the small blind, what is that called?

so the person to the left of the BB calls the blind

3 fold

then one caller
then 2 folds

then one caller

Now its my turn, I raise, right move right?

SB folds
everyone else calls my raise

Flop is K /images/graemlins/diamond.gif 8 /images/graemlins/diamond.gif 7 /images/graemlins/heart.gif

well its checked to the person to my right, he bets, I raise him, BB folds, everyone calls

Turn is the T /images/graemlins/diamond.gif

DAMN!!! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS, DAMN FLUSH DRAWS. DOUCHES!

Checked again to the guy to my right, he bets, I raise, everyone calls.

River is 3 /images/graemlins/diamond.gif

I swear this site is rigged man, wtf.

its checked to me, so what am I gonna do, I check because some tool probably has a flush.

results in white:
<font color="white"> The first guy had a flush, with 64s. </font>


Dude, what the hell, I thought KK wins all the time, atleast thats what that bastard hellmuth said, fuc[/b]kin a-hole. Based upon this one hand I am confident Party cheats and pocket Kings suck, god damnit. If only I had aces I would have won.

How do you guys deal with bad beats like this? I am pretty sure no one can beat that.


Okay, so this is my first real hand played, how did I do? I want to get better, but I am not sure how. Everytime I come on this site all I do is talk about beer and boobies, then sports. You know what I think it is. I think you just have to get lucky to win at this game, after all its gambling right? I dunno if I can take this though, I may stop right now and just continue playing roulette.

I mean man, I played for like 30 minutes and didn't win a damn thing, I even followed what that damn book Small Stakes Hold 'Em said to do too! Ed said call everything if you think you have a chance to win, and I felt like I had a chance every hand. Man, poker is so gay.

Fuc[/b]k all you guys.

/images/graemlins/tongue.gif



-TSC aka total poker n00b

btw, 10,000th post.

/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

one of my favorite threads (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showthreaded.php?Cat=&amp;Number=1152942&amp;page=&amp;view=&amp;s b=5&amp;o=&amp;vc=1)

My all time favorite though (http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&amp;Number=969201&amp;page=&amp;view=&amp;sb=5&amp;o =&amp;fpart=1&amp;vc=1)

Its classic OOT too for all ya'll too good to go there.

[jakethebake]

CONGRATS!!!

[Sponger15SB]

THIS POST SUCKS!

[ethan]

perfect

[razor]

wOOt

[stabn]

SHIP IT

Edit:

I had like 6th reply, wtf. You guys stalk TSC gut.

[mmbt0ne]

nice

[Sponger15SB]

[ QUOTE ]
CONGRATS!!!

[/ QUOTE ]

BAH I MUST HAVE BEEN SO CLOSE!

[IndieMatty]

Muck Pre-Flop - I win.

[MarkL444]

you clever bitch

[fnord_too]

This was supposed to be the post you passed El D with! LISTEN TO SFER'S PLAN NEXT TIME!!!

Grats, im going to bed now.

[MEbenhoe]

Congrats TSC

BTW

I WIN THE POOL FOR CALLING WHAT HIS 10K POST WOULD BE /images/graemlins/grin.gif /images/graemlins/grin.gif /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Edge34]

Boom. Nice work, man.

Congrats on making 10k, FINALLY. Just don't make all this happen again if (OK, when) you get 20k! /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
CONGRATS!!!

[/ QUOTE ]

BAH I MUST HAVE BEEN SO CLOSE!

[/ QUOTE ]
i was first. and it wasn't close. do u see why?

[ilya]

WWOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOHJOTOOTOTO

[BusterStacks]

pwn

[MarkL444]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
CONGRATS!!!

[/ QUOTE ]

BAH I MUST HAVE BEEN SO CLOSE!

[/ QUOTE ]
i was first. and it wasn't close. do u see why?

[/ QUOTE ]

because you didnt read the post?

[stabn]

Did anyone before posting? I sure as hell didn't.

[JinX11]

10K!!!!!111!

Congrats, dude. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Chris Daddy Cool]

it's a damn shame 10,000 doesn't move you beyond carpal\`tunnel. they should at least remove the "\`" part so you could be cool like bernie and homer.

let's all petition so that 10k posts gets a new title!

suggestions?

[TSC'sLilBrother]

I'm so proud of you bro!!

You are the apple of Mom and Dads eye!!!!

[Sponger15SB]

[ QUOTE ]

i was first. and it wasn't close. do u see why?

[/ QUOTE ]

because instead of just posting, i checked to see if i would be the first reply, which screwed me up by a fraction of a second.

I even had what I was going to say copied so I could paste it

[Sponger15SB]

[ QUOTE ]
suggestions?

[/ QUOTE ]

Legend

and yeah, there are tons more levels that the mod's can add to this forum, i wonder why they don't do any more.

[MarkL444]

[ QUOTE ]
suggestions?

[/ QUOTE ]

ThaSaltCracka

[DemonDeac Holding Rockets]

i woulda played the Ks differently

o wait............CONGRATS!!!

[GuyOnTilt]

This post is obviously a lie. Pssh.

GoT

[Slacker13]

http://www.bargainranch.com/images/firew.gif

[IndieMatty]

All these ootiots in small stakes, it's like ECW invading RAW.

[[censored]]

[ QUOTE ]
All these ootiots in small stakes, it's like ECW invading RAW.

[/ QUOTE ]

LMAO

[CrazyEyez]

To steal a line from Bill Simmons' dad:

It happened in my lifetime! It happened in my lifetime!

[TSC'sLilBrother]

[ QUOTE ]
This post is obviously a lie. Pssh.

GoT

[/ QUOTE ]no, he told me it happened. He doesn't lie to his little brother. wait would he???????? /images/graemlins/confused.gif

[ilya]

[ QUOTE ]

let's all petition so that 10k posts gets a new title!

suggestions?

[/ QUOTE ]

TSC......obviously....

[Slacker13]

I would like to congratulate you, now I have to throw up and pass out. OOT!

[A_C_Slater]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

let's all petition so that 10k posts gets a new title!

suggestions?

[/ QUOTE ]

TSC......obviously....

[/ QUOTE ]

How about "Obsessive compulsive?"

[ilya]

All the poor SSHers must be so confused and bewildered

[jakethebake]

anyone post it over on the QLC board yet? /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[_2000Flushes]

[ QUOTE ]
All these ootiots in small stakes, it's like ECW invading RAW.

[/ QUOTE ]


Or like 2+2 invading QLC.

-2kF

[DemonDeac Holding Rockets]

[ QUOTE ]
it's a damn shame 10,000 doesn't move you beyond carpal\`tunnel. they should at least remove the "\`" part so you could be cool like bernie and homer.

let's all petition so that 10k posts gets a new title!

suggestions?

[/ QUOTE ]

Grand Master
Master Chief

[Ianco15]

[ QUOTE ]
SHIP IT

[/ QUOTE ]
Ship__It

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
Master Chief

[/ QUOTE ]
this aint the navy

[Emmitt2222]

Haha, I love how this is the biggest thing to happen on these forums since SSH came out. Congrats. Anyone who gets past 10k posts should get the almighty title of 'no/life', I would say 'poker-god' but I dont think that exactly fits for TSC.

btw awesome how this 1/2 post was put in SS, just adds to the idiocy of it, nice touch

[A_C_Slater]

Small stakes is for 2/4 limit and higher you goddamn NOOB.


1/2 hands go in Micro limit hold em . Please read small stakes hold em guidelines at the top of the thread.

[jakethebake]

congrats again, tsc. g'night all.

[TSC'sLilBrother]

you better watch it, I will wake my brother up and have him go kick your ass.

[Slacker13]

I just realized that this is the first time I have ever been in this forum.

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]


Quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All these ootiots in small stakes, it's like ECW invading RAW.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------




Or like 2+2 invading QLC.

-2kF

[/ QUOTE ]


No no..because in this case (like RAW and ECW) both scenes are cool.

[stabn]

Congrats TSC. I'm going to hit the stack too. Tired as hell after the flury of posts everyone put in to help you get to 10k.

[CrazyEyez]

This feels like when McGwire hit #62. I guess that makes El Diablo Sammy Sosa.

[sthief09]

Waste


yes, I'm bitter

[IndieMatty]

[ QUOTE ]
Small stakes is for 2/4 limit and higher you goddamn NOOB.


1/2 hands go in Micro limit hold em . Please read small stakes hold em guidelines at the top of the thread.

[/ QUOTE ]

Good point. Mat, should probably remove this.

/images/graemlins/shocked.gif /images/graemlins/shocked.gif /images/graemlins/shocked.gif

[CrazyEyez]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Small stakes is for 2/4 limit and higher you goddamn NOOB.


1/2 hands go in Micro limit hold em . Please read small stakes hold em guidelines at the top of the thread.

[/ QUOTE ]

Good point. Mat, should probably remove this.

/images/graemlins/shocked.gif /images/graemlins/shocked.gif /images/graemlins/shocked.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

How funny would that be. Post 10k =
* DELETED *

[partygirluk]

Mazeltov.

[MarkL444]

[ QUOTE ]
Waste


yes, I'm bitter

[/ QUOTE ]

i added up it took him 485 days to get there. you can still beat that /images/graemlins/laugh.gif

[illunious]

wrong forum n00b.

[Slacker13]

[ QUOTE ]
wrong forum n00b

[/ QUOTE ]
I just choked on a Heinekin. That was funny. /images/graemlins/laugh.gif

[Nagoo81]

10k posts, and he has the audacity to call me a poker nerd.

[GuyOnTilt]

Small stakes is for 2/4 limit and higher you goddamn NOOB. 1/2 hands go in Micro limit hold em .

Good call. Hopefully a mod will delete this trash.

Moderator(s) notified In a moment you will be automatically returned to the forum.

GoT

[nothumb]

I had a poll about that a long time ago, I think. I forget what came of it.

NT

[BottlesOf]

It's SSers. SSH is a book dumbass.

[GuyOnTilt]

SSH is a book dumbass.

Such hostility... /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

GoT

[tyfromm]

When you get a few more posts under your belt, we will take your poker questions more seriously. Welcome to the forum.

[dr. klopek]

Congratulations. You make it o.k. for me to spend 95% of my time on 2+2 in OOT. Quick, somebody: how many words total?

[CCx]

congrats /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[spamuell]

You made me post for the first time in like a week. Congrats.

[Homer]

Wrong forum. This belongs in Micro-Limits. Noob.

[AngryCola]

Very nice TSC. The new avatar goes will with the 10k posts.

/images/graemlins/grin.gif

I hope the forum powers that be will take notice and allow a new designation for 10k posts.

It should be in honor of TSC. I've heard "Salty Dog" thrown around. Not bad, but it's bound to be just one idea out of many.

[Number4]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
suggestions?

[/ QUOTE ]

ThaSaltCracka

[/ QUOTE ]

This is where I was going.

[sfer]

Everyone who pledged, remember to give to TSC for hitting his milestone.

TSC, PM me your Party name. I just cashed out of Stars.

Also, ni han, fish.

[sfer]

[ QUOTE ]
Waste


yes, I'm bitter

[/ QUOTE ]

There's always 100K.

[jar]

Congrats man. Tough hand though.

To all the doubters, this hand ACTUALLY HAPPENED! I was the SB that folded. I feel so special to indirectly be a part of TSC's ten thousandth.

[partygirluk]

Move up to 5/10. They will respect your raises and you won't get sucked out on like this.

[Peca277]

Congrats man... too bad I was asleep when the time finally came.

[SomethingClever]

Who is ThaSaltCracka? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Cracka. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.

[jakethebake]

[ QUOTE ]
Who is ThaSaltCracka? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Cracka. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.

[/ QUOTE ]
I watched this twice last night. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Demana]

10,000 posts and still can't play poker...

Congrats TSC! /images/graemlins/cool.gif

[kyro]

I'm loving the "congratulations" he's getting from all these people. He did nothing impressive. You suck TSC.

No I'm not jealous.

[colgin]

Clearly the POTD!!

Congratulations on the 10,000th post. That is a mighty accomplishment, although I am wondering if you need to get outside a little more. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

All the best.

Colgin

[stabn]

In true TSC fashion:

BUMP

[Lazymeatball]

Just remember that if any special designation is given to people with 10k posts, El D will have to wear that badge in a month or two. Wasn't Andyfox in the running for a while there too?

[[censored]]

[ QUOTE ]
Who is ThaSaltCracka? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Cracka. You never knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.

[/ QUOTE ]

=clever

[jakethebake]

sup bro?

[nolanfan34]

The best part of this isn't the post, but the locator asking for the free shirt. Nice work.

/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[ThaSaltCracka]

can I get some damn advice or what?

[Shajen]

[ QUOTE ]
can I get some damn advice or what?

[/ QUOTE ]

This is an obvious fold. Do you see why? I'll let others elaborate.

Congrats yo.

[wacki]

Salt, you played this just fine. The flop is a 5 way. You had 10.5 SB in pot which means it's big and you don't want to fold. PF raise is standard. So is the flop raise. 8 more SB on the 4 way flop brings the pot to 18.5 SB or ~9 BB on turn. The card is a bad news 3 card flush. Still, you can't back off. You might not have the best hand, but you have 10 outs for the full house which you are going to make 21.7% of the time on the river. Your getting your odds (need 3.6:1) to call, but raising is probably best to knock out any straight draws/weak flushes(doesn't happen all of the time). The river is a nightmare. A 4 flush in a multiway pot. You got screwed, it happens. You check fold in a multiway pot at these lower stakes.

At higher stakes against tougher/thinking opponents a bluff check raise is a reasonable option when HU, but here it's suicide. At low stakes you have to show the best hand. No bluffing against these opponents. Buy pokertracker, it will help you a ton. Swings can be pretty intense in poker and poker tracker will help you identify if the cards are just not going your way. Click in the top right of the Party window for the hand history and use bisons converter next time.