Hypothetical Trade-offs

[RocketManJames]

I was bored, and so I thought a bit about a few random hypotheticals. Curious how others would change their life if these hypothetical trade-offs were a reality.

What if...

1) Every time you had sex, you'd lose a week of your life expectancy.

2) Each time you shampooed your hair, you'd increase your rate of balding by a not-so-insignificant amount.

3) Every time you flushed the toilet in your own home you'd have to pay a $5 toilet flushing tax.

4) For non-smokers, every pack of cigarettes smoked, you'd be given 1 month of free healthcare and a $250 gift card to the store of your choice.

5) Go 2 days straight without eating any solid foods, and you'd be assured a first date with the lady of your choice.

How would you change your life to adapt to each of these scenarios, if at all?

-RMJ

[BusterStacks]

no sex

shave head

piss outside

smoke more

[censored] #5

[daryn]

is a bj sex? sex is overrated anyway.

i think i am going bald anyway, not much change /images/graemlins/smile.gif

like buster said

i still wouldn't smoke. and people start for free!

i can go 2 days w/out solid food very easily, and would likely do it often.

[PoBoy321]

1) Go to an early grave
2) What if you're never going to go bald? A balding rate of 0 can be increased exponentially and remain 0.
3) Take shits in my friend's houses
4) I smoke, so I guess I'd smoke more
5) Hmmmm, I guess that I'd eat like a pig for 1 day, drink my face off for 2 and then go out with that girl who used to be in that show Freaks and Geeks (not really that hot, but I don't know, I always had a thing for her).

[daryn]

did everyone conveniently miss the fact that #4 is for non-smokers only?

i think it's funny though that you smokers would accelerate your deadly habit just to get a free gift card at best buy or something.

[PoBoy321]

Well there was no "if you're already a smoker..." option, so I just put down the obvious. BTW, you're already getting a week knocked off your life for getting laid, why should you care about smoking?

Also, it's a $250 gift certificate, plus a free month of healthcare. Even a light smoker would be making $500+ a week off gift certificates alone, plus free health care to cover expenses for your bad habits.

[PoBoy321]

And no offense, I understand you being anti-smoking and everything, but don't get all preachy about bad habits on a website devoted to GAMBLING.

[daryn]

#1 i don't really get preachy. i don't care if people smoke, as long as i'm not in the area.


#2 gambling is somehow even with smoking? i do play poker for a living you know. let's see.. one of these things provides me with green $$$$.. the other provides me with green mucous in my lungs /images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Tron]

I think I'd probably smoke if I needed to, provided I didn't get addicted.

Example: I NEED a new 60" Plasma-screen. Smoke 80 packs of cigarettes.

EDIT: I just thought about it, and I'm thinking there's probably a good chance I get addicted after EIGHTY PACKS. Mabye that was a bad example.

[The Dude]

1) Hmmm.
2) I'd make much of an effort to keep my hair short (I get it cut to about 1 inch). Probably shampoo it once between cuts.
3) Piss in my back yard or shower, but I'll pay $100/ mo to sh[/i]it in my own home.
4) I'd smoke one pack per month, methinks.
5) Yeah, I can think of a few girls I'd be willing to fast 48 hours for a date with. Do you think it would impress her if I told her on the date what I went through to get there?

[PoBoy321]

My point was that gambling generally falls in the "bad habits" category. I'm not saying that there aren't people out there who can make a great living playing poker, and I'm not saying that gambling is necessarily as detrimental as smoking, but I take issue with a non-smoker making "all you smoker"-type posts, in a place where any non-gambler could come and make a lot of "all you gambler"-type posts.

[daryn]

i think the difference is, a non-gambler can come to this site and rant about "you gambling types" and i don't have to care, mainly because i am making silly bank. if i was a problem gambler and just pissing away $$$ at online casinos or something, i'd probably get offended!

so when someone says bad stuff about smoking, all these smokers come out and get offended and try to stand up for themselves... but smoking has NO POSITIVE QUALITIES. that is the difference i think.

still, like i said before, i don't really care if people smoke. it's a pretty stupid thing to do, but there are a lot of stupid things people do that don't bother me.

[PoBoy321]

The reason why smokers get offended when people bring up how bad smoking is, is because most of us take it as an insult to our intelligence. Like, what are you expecting when you tell a smoker that smoking's bad for them? For them to turn around and say "Bullshit, are you kidding me? Well then christ, I'm gonna stop today!"
More importantly, we all have our bad habits, and I don't care about what kinds of bad habits anyone else has, so I'm not going to make an issue of it; live and let live, as it were. So I'm not trying to stand up for my bad habit and try to convince anyone that smoking is a good thing, I just don't appreciate having my bad habits thrown in my face when everyone has bad habits of their own.

[Nick B.]

[ QUOTE ]

so when someone says bad stuff about smoking, all these smokers come out and get offended and try to stand up for themselves... but smoking has NO POSITIVE QUALITIES. that is the difference i think.


[/ QUOTE ]

Smoking has plenty of positive qualities. Like making your and everybody around you's clothes stink. Can cause people around you to have difficulty breathing. Can disrupt somebody's meal.....

[fatmongo]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

so when someone says bad stuff about smoking, all these smokers come out and get offended and try to stand up for themselves... but smoking has NO POSITIVE QUALITIES. that is the difference i think.


[/ QUOTE ]

Smoking has plenty of positive qualities. Like making your and everybody around you's clothes stink. Can cause people around you to have difficulty breathing. Can disrupt somebody's meal.....

[/ QUOTE ]
Yeah, but don't forget the reason that most people start... It makes you look cool!!!

[PoBoy321]

Good god, I've created a monster... smokers aren't going to quit because you don't like it, but if it makes you feel better to talk about how much better you are than me because you don't smoke, go right ahead.

[daryn]

ok, we're way better off than you.


i don't know.. maybe it was just me, but i made a conscious decision to NOT start smoking. i think it was a good decision.

can you honestly sit there and say your decision to start smoking was a good one?

[fatmongo]

Hey I don't think its anything personal. No reason for you to take the heat for hundreds of millions of smokers. But yeah, you did create a monster.

[PoBoy321]

OK, this is the last thing I'm posting here, so if you respond to this, go [censored] yourself. I never at any point said that smoking was a good thing. I never said that I think I'm a better person than I would be if I didn't smoke. What I did say was that I smoke, it's a decision I made, so leave me be. I'm not standing next to you blowing smoke in your face, so it's none of your [censored] business what I do to myself.

Oh, just to add one thing, I don't think you're better off than me. I'd rather be a smoker and die early than be a self-righteous [censored] for the rest of my life.

[daryn]

you're evil!! eeeeeeeevillllll!!!!!!!





again, i really don't care that people smoke. i hate all those "truth" ads. i do hate people smoking within 25 ft of me inside a closed building though. that's about it.

even my girlfriend smokes. i can't dig it at all but really, i don't flip out on her or preach to her. she really should quit though, for her own good. she wants to at least. do you?

[AngryCola]

This is silly.

I have smoked for years, and I don't care what anyone says about my habit. I would never defend it, and fully expect to be looked down on for it.

You know why?

Because it is a completely stupid and careless thing to be doing. When I do stupid and careless things, I fully expect people will call me out, or even look down on me for it. Why should smoking be any different?

Nobody else forced me to start smoking. I did that all by myself. Nobody forced me to continue to smoke when I knew I was starting to get addicted and should quit. That's my own responsibility.

It's stupid to be a smoker.

I am stupid for being a smoker.

It's my choice to basically wear a sign around my neck that reads, "I'm destroying my own body."
Why should I expect anyone to think I'm not a careless fool?
No smoker should be expecting that.

[daryn]

thank you. some are just blind i guess, and they get mad at me for pointing it out!

i'm sure if that dude looked at my life, and my habits, he could find a ton of stupid stuff that i do. say he does and calls me out on it... what can i say? he would be right!

we all do stupid things.

[RocketManJames]

Was interesting to read others' responses... here are my own:

1) I'd cut down, but no way I'd give it up completely. In cutting down, I'd also have to increase my stamina so I can get the most out of the times I decide to cut my life down by a week.

2) I think I'd still keep shampooing, but again, cut down just a tad.

3) As someone else said, piss outside, but I'd pay $100 a month to [censored] in my own home, too. Anyone dare flush every other time? Not worth saving $50 in my opinion.

4) I'd probably smoke a pack a year... right before the Christmas holidays.

5) If I were single, I'd surely be fasting about once every couple of weeks. But, with smelly hair, smoker's breath, and no food in my stomach leading to my grumpiness, I really wonder if I'd be able to lose a week of my life with the lady... probably wouldn't be able to close the deal.

-RMJ

[daryn]

i was just thinking. it might be worth it to just build a toilet with a bucket underneath and have some kind of tank outside that you would empty every so often. think of the savings!

[fatmongo]

I was wondering that too. Would you still get charged $5 if you just flushed to your own septic tank?

[tolbiny]

1. to tought, if you switched it to a day or two then sex would be ok, but a week? ouch. I mean i already would have lost like, two months of my life expectancy by now /images/graemlins/grin.gif.

2. skip the shampoo- regular soap will do in a pinch. But if that fell into the shampoo catagory then getting my hair buzzed real short would be my choice.

3. already covered adequetly.

4. one pack a week every november = not buying christmass gifts ever again.

5. This is easy- no solid foods for a date with any girl ( i assume you mean any girl youve me, not any person in the world) io wanted? I used to fast for days at a time so i could roll around on the floor with a sweaty guy who was trying to beat me up. Also you said that no solid foods? milkshakes for 2 days to get a date would be no problem.

[tolbiny]

"Hmmmm, I guess that I'd eat like a pig for 1 day"

Never do this, eat half as much as usual on day 1 and it makes the two day fast much easier.

[Nick B.]

[ QUOTE ]

2) Each time you shampooed your hair, you'd increase your rate of balding by a not-so-insignificant amount.

[/ QUOTE ]

Does anyone else think it is funny that some of the responses to keep from shampooing and increasing the rate of baldness is to shave their head? What is the point? Just keep your hair and when you bald then shave your head.

[dr. klopek]

1)If this were true, I'd be immortal.
2)There's nothing I can do to stop this freight-train of baldness.
3)only take shits in other people's houses.
4)I smoke but if I didn't, I'd sure as hell start.
5)I do this all the time. I wish it would get me a date. This makes #3 a lot easier too.

[dr. klopek]

[ QUOTE ]
so leave me be.

[/ QUOTE ]

ugh.

[WDC]

Ive gone 20 days without solid food. Do I get my top 10.

But if its 10 weeks off my life I am only doing each one 5 times. That's just about a year right.