Useless Superpowers

[Danenania]

Try to think of truly useless superpowers. Also: come up with uses for the powers others invent.

I'll start.

Invisibility that only works in temperatures below -80 Degrees F.

[NLSoldier]

Dude just move to minnesota, you would be invisible like 6 months out of the year.

[Rounder041]

Well, I'm sure we've all seen the family guy where Meg can grow her fingernails as much as she pleases, that would just be lame. But I would have to say a pointless superpower would be ... the ability to slowly shoot Snicker bars out your butt, because no one would EVER believe they are actually Snickers, its too risky to find out. Plus you would just look sick: especially when you felt like eating one of your own Snickers.

[NLSoldier]

This is one of the few posts that have actually brought me to tears.

My roomate just HAD to know what was SO funny so I told him to come read it.

His reaction: "what the hell is wrong with these people!"

Yep, I still have tears streaming down my face.

Post of the month by far.

[Blarg]

Hmm, how about Ambidextrous Man? Nobody would care about his superpower.

Or Correct Spelling man? Everyone would just tell him to shut up.

Then there's Calligraphy Man, and Stick Shift man, who can drive you home when you're drunk even if your car isn't an automatic. Laundry Hamper Man could accept your dirty clothes and hang onto them until you're ready to do the wash, and You're Welcome Man could pipe in after anyone thanks you, just in case.

[thirddan]

[ QUOTE ]
Stick Shift man, who can drive you home when you're drunk even if your car isn't an automatic.

[/ QUOTE ]

Nice /images/graemlins/smile.gif

[Dynasty]

Wrong Forum Man

[Popinjay]

slowly shoot snickers out of your butt... BRILLIANT!

[nicky g]

Flightless-Bird Man.

[GWB]

[ QUOTE ]
Flightless-Bird Man.

[/ QUOTE ]

When are you going to stop attacking John Kerry? /images/graemlins/smirk.gif

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v180/helograd/kerry_osterich.jpg

[Jman28]

The Snickers-out-of-butt power can be used when you need to convince someone that you are insane. Like, if you kill a dude, and you plead insanity and then eat a butt-snickers.

[nicky g]

Must you really continue to hijack everything now that the election is over?

[BonJoviJones]

I had a bizarre dream once.

In it, I was talking to this guy who had a superpower. His power the ability to teleport between luggage compartments of greyhound buses. Not different buses, but like he could climb in one luggage compartment and climb out of another one on the same bus. (I have no idea if buses even have multiple compartments)

But it had to be a greyhound bus.

I thought the power was pretty cool, my buddy who was with me thought it was pretty lame.

The guy with the power didn't care much.

[nolanfan34]

I thought this thread would be about real superheros who had the most useless powers. I'd vote for Aquaman - what the hell is underwater anyway?

[ThaSaltCracka]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Flightless-Bird Man.

[/ QUOTE ]

When are you going to stop attacking John Kerry? /images/graemlins/smirk.gif

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v180/helograd/kerry_osterich.jpg

[/ QUOTE ]


dude, that is classic.

[YourFoxyGrandma]

The power to become Newt Gingrich for 5 minute intervals. You would be able to inhabit his body and control him for 5 minutes and then you would go back to normal. In 5 minutes you could do it again.

There's not much that you could get done in 5 minutes, plus, why would you even bother?

[WDC]

The former Soviet Union.

The ability to read a anyone at at 3-6 hod'em table.

[nicky g]

The power to morph into a coathanger.

[Matt Flynn]

Useless superpowers? That's what they said about Molecule Man.

Matt

[PokerNoob]

Isn't this the same as being Large Cranium Man?

[daryn]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">In risposta di:</font><hr />
This is one of the few posts that have actually brought me to tears.

My roomate just HAD to know what was SO funny so I told him to come read it.

His reaction: "what the hell is wrong with these people!"

Yep, I still have tears streaming down my face.

Post of the month by far.

[/ QUOTE ]


funny, somehow i managed to read it without so much as a snicker.

[nolanfan34]

I was thinking the same thing. Maybe I've finally outgrown poop jokes! /images/graemlins/laugh.gif

[NLSoldier]

Meh, whatever, you guys are no fun /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

[GWB]

[ QUOTE ]
I was thinking the same thing. Maybe I've finally outgrown poop jokes! /images/graemlins/laugh.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, poop is so passe.

http://img116.exs.cx/img116/4122/LBT3DLogo4-HillaryMedium.gif