Daliman
11-11-2004, 07:21 AM
Ok, so, my mom always sends me emails of stuff SHE gets enails of and likes, and lately, Ive ben getting a lot of closeminded crap sent my way by her, espousing itself as "How great things used to be" type thinking, but actually crap. This is what she sent me earlier tonight...
"HOW OLD IS GRANDMA?
Stay with this -- the answer is at the end - it will blow you away.
One evening, a grandson was talking to his grandmother about current events. The grandson asked his grandmother what she thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.
The Grandma replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the pill..
There were no credit cards, laser beams or ball-point pens.
Man had not invented pantyhose, air conditioners, dishwashers, clothes dryers, and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and man had yet to walk on the moon.
Your Grandfather and I got married first and then lived together.
Every family had a father and a mother.
Until I was 25, I called every man older than I, "Sir"- - and after! I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir."
We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, day-care centers, and group therapy.
Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense.
We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.
Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege.
We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.
Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.
Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started.
Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends - not purchasing condominiums.
We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.
We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios. And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.
If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan' on it, it was junk.
The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam.
Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.
We had 5&10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents. Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel.
And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail one letter and two postcards.
You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, but who could afford one?
Too bad because, gas was 11 cents a gallon.
In my day, "grass" was mowed, "coke" was a cold drink, "pot" was something your mother cooked in, and "rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby.
"Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office,"chip" meant a piece of wood, "hardware" was found in a hardware store and software" wasn't even a word.
And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby.
No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap.
And how old do you think grandma is???
Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time.
This is something to think about. How time has changed......
Grandma is 58 (born 1946)
How could so much go wrong in such a short time?"
Coincidentally, MY mother is 58 8and was born in 1946.
Anyways, here was my quick response( getting REAL sick of this type of crap floating around...)
" Mom, seriously. You gotta stop sending me this hateful crap. Back then women were subservient too. Black people were still called niggers, and werent allowed to go to school with white children, or drink from the same fountains. In your day, womens couldn't leave abusive husbands, and were allowed to legally be beaten with a stick by their husbands, as long as it was no thicker than his thumb.
This whole line of thinking disgusts me. Join the 21st century mom, I know you're not this crotchety."
Anyways, as I was having problems getting to sleep tonight,(this morning...), this reminded me of a HORRENDOUS song by Tim Mcgraw called "Back When", which, other than the fact that my wife listens to this album all the time and it sucks donkey balls, except for one half-decent song,(Live like you were dying), just pisses me off for its veiled bigotry. Here are the lyrics...
"Don't you remember
The fizz in a pepper
Peanuts in a bottle
At ten, two and four
A fried bologna sandwich
With mayo and tomato
Sittin' round the table
Don't happen much anymore
We got too complicated
It's all way over-rated
I like the old and out-dated
Way of life
Back when a hoe was a hoe
Coke was a coke
And crack's what you were doing
When you were cracking jokes
Back when a screw was a screw
The wind was all that blew
And when you said I'm down with that
Well it meant you had the flu
I miss back when
I miss back when
I miss back when
I love my records
Black, shiny vinyl
Clicks and pops
And white noise
Man they sounded fine
I had my favorite stations
The ones that played them all
Country, soul and rock-and-roll
What happened to those times?
I'm readin' Street Slang For Dummies
Cause they put pop in my country
I want more for my money
The way it was back then
Back when a hoe was a hoe
Coke was a coke
And crack's what you were doing
When you were cracking jokes
Back when a screw was a screw
The wind was all that blew
And when you said I'm down with that
Well it meant you had the flu
I miss back when
I miss back when
I miss back when
Give me a flat top for strumming
I want the whole world to be humming
Just keep it coming
The way it was back then
Back when a hoe was a hoe
Coke was a coke
And crack's what you were doing
When you were cracking jokes
Back when a screw was a screw
The wind was all that blew
And when you said I'm down with that
Well it meant you had the flu
I miss back when
I miss back when
I miss back when"
Notice most of the "Back when's" seem to bemoan a term usually associated with black slang/culture? Also that he bitches about "Pop in my country", when HE is when of the leading proponents of this crappy "Write the title, then the song" genre that seems to have taken over country music, where a cliche, country or not, is flogged to death by some dumbass in a cowboy hat who thinks its funny how stupid us city slickers are. Songs like;
"Do you want fries with that?"-Mcgraw
"A little less talk and a lot more Action." Toby Keith
"How do you like me now?" Keith
"Who's your Daddy?" Keith
"Here's a quarter, call someone who cares." Travis Tritt
Thankfully, I cant think of any others off the top of my head, but I think you get the jist of it.
Anyways, it just really pisses me off when people talk about how great things used to be way back when and how they suck now, especially in cases like the initial quoted email where it talks about comptuter terms that used to mean something else. Yeah, computers are TERRIBLE things, easily causing the downfall of society. I also like the "draft dodger" comment, considering the fact that "her" generation was the one that ushered the term in, and I'm not even sure if there WAS a draft for Korea.
So, the main crux of my posting here is to have some of the warped minds here make up a few lines of rebuttal of their own, sort of like I did back to my mom, that I can compile and send out en masse via email. I'll throw in a few more to get the ball officially rolling;
Back in YOUR day, lead paint was used on childrens toys, and caused numerous deaths and cases of permanent brain damage.
Back in YOUR day, if a woman happened to get pregnent before marriage, she was ostracized by society.
Back in YOUR day, a DUI, or "Dewey", was the guy that lived at the end of the block, as drinking and driving wasn't illegal unless you hurt someone in an accident, and often not even then.
Back in YOUR day, we lived under the constant threat of nuclear war from the russians.
Let's get some more, my warped brethren!
"HOW OLD IS GRANDMA?
Stay with this -- the answer is at the end - it will blow you away.
One evening, a grandson was talking to his grandmother about current events. The grandson asked his grandmother what she thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.
The Grandma replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the pill..
There were no credit cards, laser beams or ball-point pens.
Man had not invented pantyhose, air conditioners, dishwashers, clothes dryers, and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and man had yet to walk on the moon.
Your Grandfather and I got married first and then lived together.
Every family had a father and a mother.
Until I was 25, I called every man older than I, "Sir"- - and after! I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir."
We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, day-care centers, and group therapy.
Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense.
We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.
Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege.
We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.
Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.
Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started.
Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends - not purchasing condominiums.
We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.
We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios. And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.
If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan' on it, it was junk.
The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam.
Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.
We had 5&10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents. Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel.
And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail one letter and two postcards.
You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, but who could afford one?
Too bad because, gas was 11 cents a gallon.
In my day, "grass" was mowed, "coke" was a cold drink, "pot" was something your mother cooked in, and "rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby.
"Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office,"chip" meant a piece of wood, "hardware" was found in a hardware store and software" wasn't even a word.
And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby.
No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap.
And how old do you think grandma is???
Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time.
This is something to think about. How time has changed......
Grandma is 58 (born 1946)
How could so much go wrong in such a short time?"
Coincidentally, MY mother is 58 8and was born in 1946.
Anyways, here was my quick response( getting REAL sick of this type of crap floating around...)
" Mom, seriously. You gotta stop sending me this hateful crap. Back then women were subservient too. Black people were still called niggers, and werent allowed to go to school with white children, or drink from the same fountains. In your day, womens couldn't leave abusive husbands, and were allowed to legally be beaten with a stick by their husbands, as long as it was no thicker than his thumb.
This whole line of thinking disgusts me. Join the 21st century mom, I know you're not this crotchety."
Anyways, as I was having problems getting to sleep tonight,(this morning...), this reminded me of a HORRENDOUS song by Tim Mcgraw called "Back When", which, other than the fact that my wife listens to this album all the time and it sucks donkey balls, except for one half-decent song,(Live like you were dying), just pisses me off for its veiled bigotry. Here are the lyrics...
"Don't you remember
The fizz in a pepper
Peanuts in a bottle
At ten, two and four
A fried bologna sandwich
With mayo and tomato
Sittin' round the table
Don't happen much anymore
We got too complicated
It's all way over-rated
I like the old and out-dated
Way of life
Back when a hoe was a hoe
Coke was a coke
And crack's what you were doing
When you were cracking jokes
Back when a screw was a screw
The wind was all that blew
And when you said I'm down with that
Well it meant you had the flu
I miss back when
I miss back when
I miss back when
I love my records
Black, shiny vinyl
Clicks and pops
And white noise
Man they sounded fine
I had my favorite stations
The ones that played them all
Country, soul and rock-and-roll
What happened to those times?
I'm readin' Street Slang For Dummies
Cause they put pop in my country
I want more for my money
The way it was back then
Back when a hoe was a hoe
Coke was a coke
And crack's what you were doing
When you were cracking jokes
Back when a screw was a screw
The wind was all that blew
And when you said I'm down with that
Well it meant you had the flu
I miss back when
I miss back when
I miss back when
Give me a flat top for strumming
I want the whole world to be humming
Just keep it coming
The way it was back then
Back when a hoe was a hoe
Coke was a coke
And crack's what you were doing
When you were cracking jokes
Back when a screw was a screw
The wind was all that blew
And when you said I'm down with that
Well it meant you had the flu
I miss back when
I miss back when
I miss back when"
Notice most of the "Back when's" seem to bemoan a term usually associated with black slang/culture? Also that he bitches about "Pop in my country", when HE is when of the leading proponents of this crappy "Write the title, then the song" genre that seems to have taken over country music, where a cliche, country or not, is flogged to death by some dumbass in a cowboy hat who thinks its funny how stupid us city slickers are. Songs like;
"Do you want fries with that?"-Mcgraw
"A little less talk and a lot more Action." Toby Keith
"How do you like me now?" Keith
"Who's your Daddy?" Keith
"Here's a quarter, call someone who cares." Travis Tritt
Thankfully, I cant think of any others off the top of my head, but I think you get the jist of it.
Anyways, it just really pisses me off when people talk about how great things used to be way back when and how they suck now, especially in cases like the initial quoted email where it talks about comptuter terms that used to mean something else. Yeah, computers are TERRIBLE things, easily causing the downfall of society. I also like the "draft dodger" comment, considering the fact that "her" generation was the one that ushered the term in, and I'm not even sure if there WAS a draft for Korea.
So, the main crux of my posting here is to have some of the warped minds here make up a few lines of rebuttal of their own, sort of like I did back to my mom, that I can compile and send out en masse via email. I'll throw in a few more to get the ball officially rolling;
Back in YOUR day, lead paint was used on childrens toys, and caused numerous deaths and cases of permanent brain damage.
Back in YOUR day, if a woman happened to get pregnent before marriage, she was ostracized by society.
Back in YOUR day, a DUI, or "Dewey", was the guy that lived at the end of the block, as drinking and driving wasn't illegal unless you hurt someone in an accident, and often not even then.
Back in YOUR day, we lived under the constant threat of nuclear war from the russians.
Let's get some more, my warped brethren!