03-05-2002, 04:10 AM
It's amazing how badly some people play poker. Sometimes I just think to myself, "how is it possible he doesn't realize how much he sucks?"
The last time I played cards, I saw so many bad plays and ridiculous moves it literally had me laughing. I couldn't help it.
One grumbling old curmudgeon in the game was one of the worst players I've EVER played with. His entire strategy appeared to be as follows:
1. Nurse a short stack for a couple hours until dealt AA, KK, or QQ.
2. Raise all-in.
3. Start shaking and sweating and mumbling until everyone folds. If it looks like someone might actually call you, say "let's see who's got the real hand here. Let's see who's got a hand." He actually stated at one point, and I'm not making this up, that he wasn't brave enough to raise with AK on the button. Thanks for the info! Just in case it wasn't clear.
Another grumpy old man had a similarly flawed strategy. He would buy in for $100 and then wait a couple rounds until he found an ace or any pair. Then he would move all-in. Alternatively, he would wait until he flopped any top pair, then move all-in.
One time he moved in with A8 and got called by TT for, of course, $100. He happened to catch an A on the turn, only to lose to a T on the river. You should have heard the man bitch and moan about his awful luck. Everytime he lost a pot, he would snap his cards in disgust and look at the board for a few seconds and then mumble "Yeah, that looks about right, what possible card would come besides that one? Of course." and then muck in disgust. NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENED. He did this even when he had been behind the whole way.
Another player refused to bet ever unless he had the nuts. One time I made a cursory stab at the pot with absolutely nothing. He called BEHIND me, so I was completely done, period. We check the turn and river and I win when I pair a 6 on the river. He practically tore his cards in two because I "rivered" his king high flush draw. He couldn't believe his awful luck. "They always get what they need!" he moaned, as the dealer pushed me my monster $50 pot.
Another wily player who actually was pretty good just couldn't resist the thought of busting out a big pair. He would make interesing moves like call $70 preflop with 62s in the BLINDS when the blinds are 1-2-2.
Yes, some stacks were deep but surely you can wait for a better situation to snap someone off than this? Six-deuce? The other good thing about this player was that he had such contempt for all the rest of us, he was so aggressive, that all you had to do was check to him if you wanted some money in the pot. It was that simple.
I watched a player who plays a lot of limit hold'em join the game and proceed to slowplay AA and KK preflop, doubling up against a flopped two pair TWICE by catching up on the river. Then, he flops top pair with AQ in an UNRAISED pot and gets about $350 in the middle and somehow pulls out of that one. Of course, at one point everyone folds to him on the button and he raises $25 to win the $4 worth of blinds.
Unfortunately, the old man who only raises with three hands goes all-in. The limit player thinks for a good two minutes and finally decides to lay down, flipping over KQs to show his big laydown! It apparently took him two minutes to deduce that his opponent wasn't on a completely naked re-steal I guess.
Unreal.
natedogg
The last time I played cards, I saw so many bad plays and ridiculous moves it literally had me laughing. I couldn't help it.
One grumbling old curmudgeon in the game was one of the worst players I've EVER played with. His entire strategy appeared to be as follows:
1. Nurse a short stack for a couple hours until dealt AA, KK, or QQ.
2. Raise all-in.
3. Start shaking and sweating and mumbling until everyone folds. If it looks like someone might actually call you, say "let's see who's got the real hand here. Let's see who's got a hand." He actually stated at one point, and I'm not making this up, that he wasn't brave enough to raise with AK on the button. Thanks for the info! Just in case it wasn't clear.
Another grumpy old man had a similarly flawed strategy. He would buy in for $100 and then wait a couple rounds until he found an ace or any pair. Then he would move all-in. Alternatively, he would wait until he flopped any top pair, then move all-in.
One time he moved in with A8 and got called by TT for, of course, $100. He happened to catch an A on the turn, only to lose to a T on the river. You should have heard the man bitch and moan about his awful luck. Everytime he lost a pot, he would snap his cards in disgust and look at the board for a few seconds and then mumble "Yeah, that looks about right, what possible card would come besides that one? Of course." and then muck in disgust. NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENED. He did this even when he had been behind the whole way.
Another player refused to bet ever unless he had the nuts. One time I made a cursory stab at the pot with absolutely nothing. He called BEHIND me, so I was completely done, period. We check the turn and river and I win when I pair a 6 on the river. He practically tore his cards in two because I "rivered" his king high flush draw. He couldn't believe his awful luck. "They always get what they need!" he moaned, as the dealer pushed me my monster $50 pot.
Another wily player who actually was pretty good just couldn't resist the thought of busting out a big pair. He would make interesing moves like call $70 preflop with 62s in the BLINDS when the blinds are 1-2-2.
Yes, some stacks were deep but surely you can wait for a better situation to snap someone off than this? Six-deuce? The other good thing about this player was that he had such contempt for all the rest of us, he was so aggressive, that all you had to do was check to him if you wanted some money in the pot. It was that simple.
I watched a player who plays a lot of limit hold'em join the game and proceed to slowplay AA and KK preflop, doubling up against a flopped two pair TWICE by catching up on the river. Then, he flops top pair with AQ in an UNRAISED pot and gets about $350 in the middle and somehow pulls out of that one. Of course, at one point everyone folds to him on the button and he raises $25 to win the $4 worth of blinds.
Unfortunately, the old man who only raises with three hands goes all-in. The limit player thinks for a good two minutes and finally decides to lay down, flipping over KQs to show his big laydown! It apparently took him two minutes to deduce that his opponent wasn't on a completely naked re-steal I guess.
Unreal.
natedogg