Dr Wogga
09-20-2004, 11:50 PM
......."Good evening. This is Dan Rather and I am truly sorry that my smear piece, in support of my "Anybody-but-Bush" political views, was ripped apart by such vast right-wing conspirators as the L.A. Times" ha, ha, ha, ha, ha
"Yes ladies and gentlemen, I did not check and re-check my facts, and was ambushed by somebody named Burkett - who told me a white lie (Camera zooms in to find Rather nose growing at rapid rate - a 'Pinnochio-ism' says RNC reporter-emeritus Michael Moore in a hushed tone).
"In fact, ladies and gentlemen, I got caught with my pants down Mr and Mrs America..........err literally I think. Cause, aw shucks, I kinda got caught doing to Bush what I've been accusing him and his daddy of doing - you know, making up facts as you go along....ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha........"However, at this time, I believe the honest thing to do is to moon the very country that has brought me great wealth and opportunity by being the pompous, arrogant A-hole that the right has been accusing me of for decades. Witness my response when confronted with the obvious questions of validity of a document that mysteriously surfaced roughly 40 years later - "Who is putting you up to question this (the CBS news repoprt)?" Never addressing whether there was any merit to the question, but Rather (ha, ha, ha great coincidence, huh?) "How dare you challenge me, the Pompous, the Arrogant, the Anti-Bush???"
Rather continues his diatribe: "The only difference? This time I got caught (camera zooms in further to do facial close-up of danny-boy in his best Clinton-esque "I did not have sex with that woman" hurtful expression designed to elicit sympathy from the strap-on crowd). Let me further say, Mr and Mrs America everyday working stiff, that it is now apparent that the mainstream TV stations, are no longer capable of presenting honest reportage of a political campaign, but Rather (ha, ha, ha very coincidental choice of words) we feel the need to insert ourselves dis-honestly, in the hopes of:
A.not getting caught and
B.getting back our ratings from the cable news monsters who took them by being fair (which of course we no longer can be) and
C. Trying our damnest to influence an election by being downright LIARS....because
D. We think the American public is dumb enough that we can put any sh%t on TV, put our name to it, and the American public will buy it without reservation.........
Ha, ha, ha..........those days are over demagogues. Those days are over.......ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha..... Double digits and growing...........Foe mo' yo'
"Yes ladies and gentlemen, I did not check and re-check my facts, and was ambushed by somebody named Burkett - who told me a white lie (Camera zooms in to find Rather nose growing at rapid rate - a 'Pinnochio-ism' says RNC reporter-emeritus Michael Moore in a hushed tone).
"In fact, ladies and gentlemen, I got caught with my pants down Mr and Mrs America..........err literally I think. Cause, aw shucks, I kinda got caught doing to Bush what I've been accusing him and his daddy of doing - you know, making up facts as you go along....ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha........"However, at this time, I believe the honest thing to do is to moon the very country that has brought me great wealth and opportunity by being the pompous, arrogant A-hole that the right has been accusing me of for decades. Witness my response when confronted with the obvious questions of validity of a document that mysteriously surfaced roughly 40 years later - "Who is putting you up to question this (the CBS news repoprt)?" Never addressing whether there was any merit to the question, but Rather (ha, ha, ha great coincidence, huh?) "How dare you challenge me, the Pompous, the Arrogant, the Anti-Bush???"
Rather continues his diatribe: "The only difference? This time I got caught (camera zooms in further to do facial close-up of danny-boy in his best Clinton-esque "I did not have sex with that woman" hurtful expression designed to elicit sympathy from the strap-on crowd). Let me further say, Mr and Mrs America everyday working stiff, that it is now apparent that the mainstream TV stations, are no longer capable of presenting honest reportage of a political campaign, but Rather (ha, ha, ha very coincidental choice of words) we feel the need to insert ourselves dis-honestly, in the hopes of:
A.not getting caught and
B.getting back our ratings from the cable news monsters who took them by being fair (which of course we no longer can be) and
C. Trying our damnest to influence an election by being downright LIARS....because
D. We think the American public is dumb enough that we can put any sh%t on TV, put our name to it, and the American public will buy it without reservation.........
Ha, ha, ha..........those days are over demagogues. Those days are over.......ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha..... Double digits and growing...........Foe mo' yo'