Rules for life

[Whistler]

I, along with my friends, have compiled a small list of rules, to live a good, healthy life, i figure you guys would be a good group to add some more rules.
1. never turn down a free T-shirt
2. never drink anything out of a box
3. never eat any kind of sausage out of a can
4. never trust a girl with brown eyebrowes and blonde hair.
5. never buy anything other than a drink from a guy in a bowtie.

[Bob Moss]

That list is a good start, but I must disagree with #2, as there is nothing wrong with box wine.

Bob

[TimM]

[ QUOTE ]
There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese.

[/ QUOTE ]

[bisonbison]

That list is a good start, but I must disagree with #2, as there is nothing wrong with box wine.

Maybe it's a bit of a dodge, though. Box wine actually comes from a space age bag within the box.

[Turning Stone Pro]

Teen Wolf, the ultimate '80s movie. I like it when the coach says "it doesnt matter how you play the game it's if you win or lose . . . and even that doesnt matter all that much".

TSP

[Whistler]

timm whats that line from poolhall junkies? sounds really familiar....and lets be serious, box wine sucks. BUT if you have never had a "space party" where you take the bag out of the box and strap it to your back with a hose coming out to drink from, you havent lived.

[thirddan]

" is this a poker forum up in here? cuz now its as quiet as a church..." Didn't really care for the movie except Walkens line at the end "IM A MILLIONAIRE, i lose this 80 and i go get another 80..."

[coffeecrazy1]

6. Never turn down a massage.
7. Never be THAT guy(situation unimportant).
8. Never think that your father couldn't take you in a fight.
9. Never assume that someone else can make adequate travel arrangements.

[Q8offsuit]

Don't eat the yellow snow.

[J.Brown]

Never play leap frog with a unicorn.

Never shave on while on acid.

Never pet a burning dog.

and most importantly.......

Never ever run with an ax in your mouth.

J.Brown

[TheArtist]

-Never turn down Sex
-Always pay attention


ThArtist

[Duke]

[ QUOTE ]
3. never eat any kind of sausage out of a can

[/ QUOTE ]

Is this some sort of anal sex/fellatio guideline?

~D

[Duke]

[ QUOTE ]
Never turn down Sex

[/ QUOTE ]

Unless it involves sausage that was recently in a can.

~D

[Duke]

[ QUOTE ]
" is this a poker forum up in here? cuz now its as quiet as a church..."

[/ QUOTE ]

You say it wrong anyways.

~D

[Myrtle]

Never break a fart bubble with your nose when in a hot tub.........

Never swat a fly when standing in front of your toilet while peeing.....

[Phat Mack]

[ QUOTE ]
Paige's rules originally appeared in the June 13, 1953 issue of Collier's. The version below is taken from his autobiography, Maybe I'll Pitch Forever (as told to David Lipman, 1962):

Avoid fried meats which angry up the blood.

If your stomach disputes you, lie down and pacify it with cool thoughts.

Keep the juices flowing by jangling around gently as you move.

Go very light on the vices, such as carrying on in society -- the social ramble ain't restful.

Avoid running at all times.

Don't look back -- something might be gaining on you.

[/ QUOTE ]

[Andy B]

How 'bout when I'm standing in front of your toilet?

[berya]

Here is a gambling one.

Rule#1
Never land money to anybody and I mean anybody in a casino.

[Matt Flynn]

if it flies, floats or phucks, rent it.


"Abrahim, your grandmother was the most expensive piece of a$$ I ever had."

- Lucky Chances' Abe's grandfather, as told by Abe.

[RocketManJames]

My personal favorite:

If you're not wasted, then the day is.

-RMJ

[Knockwurst]

Never let a woman put anything in your mouth before finding out what it is first. /images/graemlins/shocked.gif

[Duke]

Great choice of smiley!

"She might not be a woman" is the obvious continuation.

~D