Is 21 and 15 cool? [Archive] - Two Plus Two Older Archives

blackaces13

08-12-2004, 05:20 AM

[ QUOTE ]
does anyone think there's a problem wtih a 23 yr old guy and an 18 yr old girl? one of my friends just couldn't believe i could consider it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Let's apply my equation. 1/2 of 23 is 11.5, add 7 and you get 18.5. So you're right on the cusp here but some people choose to round down in situations with a .5 at the end and in general I have no problem with that policy.

Strictly by the book though she would have to have been born before February 12th 1986.

daryn

08-12-2004, 05:29 AM

here's a funny story... this took place like 2 years ago. that might be important. anyway..

i was at this wedding and met this girl. this was like an early wedding and early reception, got out at like 4pm. anyway me and this girl fooled around a bit after the reception. we were all in the same hotel so obviously she came to my room, and we fooled around some more.

anyway then we go to bed. i wake up in the morning and i'm looking to brush my teeth. i go into my suitcase and i have this old ass travel kit from way back in the day. i open it and there's a toothbrush and toothpaste. hey why not right? i notice the toothpaste has the classic old colgate logo on it. you know how you can tell stuff is from the 80s? like remember diet coke cans? anyway...

this toothpaste is old as hell! i check it out to see if there is some kind of expiration date on it. there it is, AUG 85.

i tell this chick.. i'm like, wow, this toothpaste expired in august of 1985!!

she's like, oh, that's when i was born!

/images/graemlins/ooo.gif

BadBoyBenny

08-12-2004, 08:07 AM

I've always used a round down version of the rule. No half years necessary.

MMMMMM

08-12-2004, 08:18 AM

I really don't think so. She should at least have graduated high school to be dating a 21 year old. I think it isn't fair to her. Plus you could get in some very serious trouble in many states. Just being close to the age of consent isn't good enough in the eyes of the law and you could end up with major problems.

I don't see a terrible problem with say a 24-year old (or even older) dating a 19-year old: a bit odd but not nearly in the same ballpark as what you are talking about here. Also, she is still in many ways a kid emotionally speaking and in her place in life at this time, and your world and hers are too far apart. In a few years things just might be different but by then you and she will have probably gone your separate ways.

elwoodblues

08-12-2004, 08:26 AM

In general, I think she's too young. Would you think it was weird if she wanted to date a 9 year old?

Serious question - what does a 21 year old have in common with someone who doesn't have a driver's license, can't get into a rated R movie without adult supervision, and just finished their Freshman year in High School (presumably).

Utah

08-12-2004, 09:04 AM

I asked a bunch of girls. Its suprising how many of them had their first experiences in relationships like this and they all have good memories of it.

I would say way too young. However, several girls disagree.

elwoodblues

08-12-2004, 09:25 AM

and your favorite movie is taxi driver...someone needs to do some soul-searching. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

Gamblor

08-12-2004, 09:32 AM

I was fooling around with an 18 year old freshman earlier in the year.

She was hot, so I figured I'd hang out with her. But when she started talking about llamas and giving her computer a name and talking about her adventures to Atlantis, it quickly became "let's bang her and get the hell out of here."

I'd never agree to see one exclusively unless she was Lindsey Lohan and even then I expect daily road head.

That being said, if there's grass on the field, play ball.

Oh, and age of consent in Canada is 14 unless you're in a position of authority. I asked a lawyer buddy if banging her from behind counted. It didn't. /images/graemlins/cool.gif

Gamblor

08-12-2004, 09:35 AM

Does she even have boobs?

James Boston

08-12-2004, 09:43 AM

[ QUOTE ]
....unless you're in a position of authority. I asked a lawyer buddy if banging her from behind counted.

[/ QUOTE ]

LMAO

NoPeak

08-12-2004, 10:45 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I'm 21 and starting to see this 15 year old I work with. Do you guys think that is cool? I realize alot of people will hate but I think it's alright. What is your take? Also the age of consent in half the states is 16.

[/ QUOTE ]

If there is grass on the field, then play ball.

The once and future king

08-12-2004, 10:51 AM

[ QUOTE ]
unless you're in a position of authority. I asked a lawyer buddy if banging her from behind counted.

[/ QUOTE ]

Isnt a missionary a figure of authority.

In these cases the panda approach is the only way to go(eats shoots and leaves) as conversation with anyone under the age of 22 is immensly painfull and grating (Im 31).

However it has to be said that 95% of girls under said age all seem hot to me.

As you get older youth in and of itself gets more and more attractive as girls your own age suffer more and more from wear and tear and gravity.

ThaSaltCracka

08-12-2004, 10:56 AM

[censored] no, that ain't cool. You better hope she doesn't have an older brother, because if I was her brother I would kick your ass.

scotnt73

08-12-2004, 11:10 AM

[ QUOTE ]
[censored] no, that ain't cool. You better hope she doesn't have an older brother, because if I was her brother I would kick your ass.

[/ QUOTE ]

id be more worried about her parents filing rape charges.

ThaSaltCracka

08-12-2004, 11:49 AM

or both, haha

Clarkmeister

08-12-2004, 11:53 AM

I don't get it. Are you dating her because you can't pick up a girl near your own age?

nothumb

08-12-2004, 12:03 PM

I'm with the Cracka here. I'd probably kick the crap out of you.

I'm 21 and I can't tell the difference between about 13 and 17 anymore. My rule of thumb is to assume she's 13, that settles me right down.

A lot of girls that age get involved with older guys because they think it will give them a more mature introduction to relationships or something. How mature is a guy our age dating a girl too young to drive?

Then again, I know a lot of 21 year olds with a mental age of 15 or so. This complicates matters somewhat, though from a legal perspective I think it's pretty clear.

Is this one of those "I'm stuck at work with a kind of cute chick who grows on me" kind of situations, or do you actually think you can have a meaningful exchange with this girl? Cause I want to bang fifteen year old girls all the time. I just don't.

I think 18 and 23 is fine.

NT

benfranklin

08-12-2004, 12:09 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I don't get it. Are you dating her because you can't pick up a girl near your own age?

[/ QUOTE ]

The fact that he is doing it, and that he is seeking approval from a bunch of poker players, indicates that they are probably of a similar emotional age. As are some of the responders above, particularly those discussing groundskeeping.

jdl22

08-12-2004, 12:22 PM

So she just graduated from high school?

I think a big factor is college. If somebody is 18 and a freshman in college and you are 22 or 23 and a senior it's definately fine. If however you were both seniors that's a little dodgy.

CollegePlayer

08-12-2004, 12:32 PM

ArchAngel71857

08-12-2004, 12:42 PM

15 get ya 20!

Daryn,

you are fine (awesome story btw). but if it was two years ago, you were 21 and she was 16?

16 get ya 20!

but you know what they say, if they are crawling on all fours, they're in the right position. Heyyyyy yooooooooo.

-AA

tolbiny

08-12-2004, 12:57 PM

Daryn,
since all we have is our own personal experiences here's mine.
A couple of years ago i was a month shy of my 23rd birthday and i met this really nice, cute girl who asked me out.
She had just graduated High school, and it was her 18th birthday. I turned her down, but i didnt want to. If she had been a year into college and i had been 24 or even 25 i probably would have accepted. I dont know if i could really explain my reasoning, except to say that experience counts a lot more than actual age, and my was she niave. I know how easy it would have been to talk her into thinks that she may or may not have wanted to do on her own, to really dominate the relationship (while still seeming to be a sweet, decent guy about it). I dont want to be that guy, but i also know that part of me DID want to be that guy.

(and for the record- 21/15- uhhhh no)

tolbiny

08-12-2004, 12:58 PM

if she is an only child can we volunteer to become surrogate older brothers and kick his ass?

Malarky

08-12-2004, 01:00 PM

HALF YOUR AGE PLUS SEVEN

That is the rule.

ThaSaltCracka

08-12-2004, 01:06 PM

yes, yes we can.

B00T

08-12-2004, 01:29 PM

[ QUOTE ]

but you know what they say, if they are crawling on all fours, they're in the right position. Heyyyyy yooooooooo.

-AA

[/ QUOTE ]

I always thought it was... "Old enough to crawl, already in the right position"

astroglide

08-12-2004, 03:08 PM

23/18 is fine

B Dids

08-12-2004, 03:37 PM

As one of my friends pointed out- the best thing about turning 28 is that I can now legally date somebody 10 years younger than I am.

BeerMoney

08-12-2004, 04:25 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I don't get it. Are you dating her because you can't pick up a girl near your own age?

[/ QUOTE ]

That's disappointing Clark. Its very unimaginative and lacks any real thought. Maybe the girls got a body 10X better than the girls his age. Maybe she has a ton of charm. Maybe she looks up to him and he likes that. Maybe she's flirty. Ever seen the movie "Beautiful Girls"? See the way that Natalie Portman charms the older guy? I could have fallen in love with her.. You have to resist it, but the feelings are understandable. What the poster is doing is only legally wrong, not necessarily morally wrong. If he was driving around high-schools trying to pick up 14 year olds, that would be different. He works with someone who happens to be younger that he's developed a crush on. The law is what is unfortunate here, not his morals.

Rick Nebiolo

08-12-2004, 04:28 PM

I don't think so. That said, I believe 51 and 45 is quite proper.

~ Rick

ThaSaltCracka

08-12-2004, 04:46 PM

[ QUOTE ]
What the poster is doing is only legally wrong, not necessarily morally wrong.

[/ QUOTE ] Bull [censored], its both. There is a serious difference between a 15 and a 21 year old. Spare me the BS about being on the same emotional level, the only way this would be possible would be if the 21 is somewhat handicapped or mentaly retarded. 21 year olds have done far more than a 15 year could ever imagine. Not to mention the fact that alcohol(which would be absurdly easy to acquire) would definitely be a factor. This is wrong on a lot of levels, IMO, and the poster should be intelligent enough to know this. In fact he shouldn't even be asking this question, this is a no-brainer.

Cleveland Guy

08-12-2004, 04:57 PM

IT's PLAIN SICK!!!!!

What could you possibly have in common with her?

Malarky

08-12-2004, 05:00 PM

scotnt73

08-12-2004, 05:03 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I don't think so. That said, I believe 51 and 45 is quite proper.

~ Rick

[/ QUOTE ]
i think 24 and 18 would be ok. but 15 is a child. for christ sake she was in junior high 4 months ago.

BeerMoney

08-12-2004, 05:03 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
What the poster is doing is only legally wrong, not necessarily morally wrong.

[/ QUOTE ] Bull [censored], its both. There is a serious difference between a 15 and a 21 year old. Spare me the BS about being on the same emotional level, the only way this would be possible would be if the 21 is somewhat handicapped or mentaly retarded. 21 year olds have done far more than a 15 year could ever imagine. Not to mention the fact that alcohol(which would be absurdly easy to acquire) would definitely be a factor. This is wrong on a lot of levels, IMO, and the poster should be intelligent enough to know this. In fact he shouldn't even be asking this question, this is a no-brainer.

[/ QUOTE ]

If he legitimately likes the girl, then what's the big deal? You can't say if he is or isn't a scumbag. You really don't know his intentions.. Just that he is older than her. Guess what, 15 year old guys would try banging her too. Who cares about the alcohol.. That's another law. IF I saw a 16 yr old getting tanked, I wouldn't call them a bad person. In fact I did it myself and I'd still thank the guys that had the ballz to buy me the beer.

CollegePlayer

08-12-2004, 05:04 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I don't get it. Are you dating her because you can't pick up a girl near your own age?

[/ QUOTE ]

That's disappointing Clark. Its very unimaginative and lacks any real thought. Maybe the girls got a body 10X better than the girls his age. Maybe she has a ton of charm. Maybe she looks up to him and he likes that. Maybe she's flirty. Ever seen the movie "Beautiful Girls"? See the way that Natalie Portman charms the older guy? I could have fallen in love with her.. You have to resist it, but the feelings are understandable. What the poster is doing is only legally wrong, not necessarily morally wrong. If he was driving around high-schools trying to pick up 14 year olds, that would be different. He works with someone who happens to be younger that he's developed a crush on. The law is what is unfortunate here, not his morals.

[/ QUOTE ]
i love that movie -- but only the scenes with Nat Portman. She is amazing. I agree with what you wrote in some cases. The fact that OP stated the age of consent makes me believe this isnt one of those instances.

CollegePlayer

08-12-2004, 05:07 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
What the poster is doing is only legally wrong, not necessarily morally wrong.

[/ QUOTE ] Bull [censored], its both. There is a serious difference between a 15 and a 21 year old. Spare me the BS about being on the same emotional level, the only way this would be possible would be if the 21 is somewhat handicapped or mentaly retarded. 21 year olds have done far more than a 15 year could ever imagine. Not to mention the fact that alcohol(which would be absurdly easy to acquire) would definitely be a factor. This is wrong on a lot of levels, IMO, and the poster should be intelligent enough to know this. In fact he shouldn't even be asking this question, this is a no-brainer.

[/ QUOTE ]

If he legitimately likes the girl, then what's the big deal? You can't say if he is or isn't a scumbag. You really don't know his intentions.. Just that he is older than her. Guess what, 15 year old guys would try banging her too. Who cares about the alcohol.. That's another law. IF I saw a 16 yr old getting tanked, I wouldn't call them a bad person. In fact I did it myself and I'd still thank the guys that had the ballz to buy me the beer.

[/ QUOTE ]
Again. Lets be honest. Most 23 year olds dating 15 year olds are doing so for the wrong reasons. If they are only after sex, than no it is not okay. The 15 year old isnt emotionally mature enough to ahve some 23 year old loser want her only for sex.

Would you let your daughter date a 23 year old?

offTopic

08-12-2004, 05:19 PM

Bump-en-Stein

08-12-2004, 05:37 PM

"I met him 15 years ago. I was told there was nothing left, no concience, no reason, no understanding. Even the most rudimentary sense of life or death; of good or evil; right or wrong. I met this six year old child with this blank, pale emotionless face and the blackest eyes.........the Devil's eyes. I spent eight years trying to reach him and then another seven trying to keep him locked up because I realised that what was living behind those boys eyes was purely and simply.....evil."

Senor Choppy

08-12-2004, 05:43 PM

Even if it was cool it would be incredible stupid. At least wait until she's 16, then do whatever you like and don't worry about what other people think.

ThaSaltCracka

08-12-2004, 05:47 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Guess what, 15 year old guys would try banging her too.

[/ QUOTE ] Guess what, a 15 year old banging a 15 year old is not even close to a 15 yeard old banging a 21 year old.

[ QUOTE ]
Who cares about the alcohol.. That's another law.

[/ QUOTE ] ?????
what???? When people drink they make(for the most part) decisions they wouldn't normally make. If you can't see a problem with a 15 year old girl potentially getting drunk around an older male who is interested in, then you must be crazy.

[ QUOTE ]
IF I saw a 16 yr old getting tanked, I wouldn't call them a bad person. In fact I did it myself and I'd still thank the guys that had the ballz to buy me the beer.

[/ QUOTE ] This has zero relevance to the situation being discussed. Most people don't have a problem with underage drinking.

astroglide

08-12-2004, 05:49 PM

while i don't think 21 and 15 is cool, i think people may be out of touch with how "advanced" 15 year olds are. i was doing drugs and sexually active when i was 15 (11 years ago), and so were virtually all of my friends. not to say that's any kind of a credit to maturity or anything else, it's just that i think the "she's 4 months away from junior high!" puts a leave it to beaver kind of spin on things.

scotnt73

08-12-2004, 05:54 PM

[ QUOTE ]
while i don't think 21 and 15 is cool, i think people may be out of touch with how "advanced" 15 year olds are. i was doing drugs and sexually active when i was 15 (11 years ago), and so were virtually all of my friends. not to say that's any kind of a credit to maturity or anything else, it's just that i think the "she's 4 months away from junior high!" puts a leave it to beaver kind of spin on things.

[/ QUOTE ]

im not arguing a 15 year olds right to do drugs and have sex. im arguing a grown man doing it with them.

WC64

08-12-2004, 06:46 PM

Why would you even ask such a question? I am 22 and have actually hit on at least one 15 year old (who looked a lot older), but once I found out there age I was pretty embarrassed. I got made fun of for a long time.

I have a daughter who is almost 4 and if she was 15 and dating someone who was 21 probably even 19 or 20. I would be pretty pissed.

I see nothing wrong with a 23 year old and a 18 year old although in my experiences most 18 year old girls have been pretty immature but I am sure some of them are ok lol.

BeerMoney

08-12-2004, 07:34 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Guess what, 15 year old guys would try banging her too.

[/ QUOTE ] Guess what, a 15 year old banging a 15 year old is not even close to a 15 yeard old banging a 21 year old.

[ QUOTE ]
Who cares about the alcohol.. That's another law.

[/ QUOTE ] ?????
what???? When people drink they make(for the most part) decisions they wouldn't normally make. If you can't see a problem with a 15 year old girl potentially getting drunk around an older male who is interested in, then you must be crazy.

[/ QUOTE ]

What's the matter saltcracka, are you mad that some older guy in your neighborhood took your virginity and now you can't get it back.

ThaSaltCracka

08-12-2004, 07:41 PM

You are so childish man. I guess the only way you can "refute" my rational argument and concern is by resorting to name calling and personal attacks. Your posts have lost any validity they MAVE have had.

Sponger15SB

08-12-2004, 07:44 PM

i think its fine for a 23 year old to go out with an 18 year old, however, i would never do it.

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 08:22 PM

BeerMoney is correct. Also I live in a secluded area and most of the young people moved after high school. So there is a very small dating pool. I think she is physically and mentally mature for her age. In my circumstance it's alright.

Clarkmeister

08-12-2004, 08:23 PM

"That's disappointing Clark. Its very unimaginative and lacks any real thought."

I didn't know it was necessary to be creative and witty when condemning child molestation.

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 08:26 PM

I didn't know we were discussing child molestation?

Kurn, son of Mogh

08-12-2004, 08:30 PM

You need to ask yourself one question, and if you don't know the answer, you *must* find it out, because your very life may depend on it.

What question?

Does her father own a gun? /images/graemlins/cool.gif

J_V

08-12-2004, 08:31 PM

I stopped talking to a 19yr old girl cause I thought it was inappropriate (I was 23 at the time). 21 to 15 is illegal and should be.

Ray Zee

08-12-2004, 08:31 PM

you may get a thrill now but big bubba in prison will get his with you, after you go there and they find out what you are in for. thats no joke.
you may be just 21 and stupid. but you are likely to be in jail soon stupid.

J_V

08-12-2004, 08:33 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I don't get it. Are you dating her because you can't pick up a girl near your own age?

[/ QUOTE ]

This is sort've predatory in my book. Pretty soon, you'll be going door to door.

Utah

08-12-2004, 08:36 PM

Do you object to the age or is it simply a legal matter? If memory serves me correctly, I believe a year or so ago you said that it was okay for a 50 year old to be with a 17 year old. I think that is worse than 21 and 15.

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 09:06 PM

Plus she was in junior high 15 months ago, not 4.

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 09:06 PM

He lives on the other side of the country!

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 09:08 PM

I'm not breaking any laws. Also if I was statutory rape is pretty much impossible to prosecute if the girl isn't pregnant.

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 09:08 PM

Lol @ Ray Zee being for 51 and 17 but not 21 and 15. Let me guess, Ray is 51?

BeerMoney

08-12-2004, 09:16 PM

[ QUOTE ]
BeerMoney is correct.

[/ QUOTE ]

Where else do you get to read something like this?

The Ocho

08-12-2004, 09:21 PM

[ QUOTE ]
statutory rape is pretty much impossible to prosecute if the girl isn't pregnant

[/ QUOTE ]

I wouldn't press your luck. Just being accused of this sort of crime can really mess up your life.

I'm sure she's cool and all but she's just not worth it dude. Nobody is.

Ray Zee

08-12-2004, 09:46 PM

i dont remember that, find the post and the context. 17 is still ilegal in some states i think. if not then i suppose if its not illegal than it might not be okay but still legal. this is clearly illegal.

banditbdl

08-12-2004, 10:06 PM

I guess I don't have any sort of moral or ethical problem, but I don't think I'd say it was cool either. I mean if you're 21 years old and going out with a 15 year old it's still kinda pathetic even if I don't have any moral or ethical problems with it. Of course, my statement that this is pathetic is pretty prejudicial and I'd really have to know you and the girl to make a true judgment call, but I just can't imagine how anyone over the age of 20 could possibly wanna date a 15 year old. 15-year old girls are frightening.

banditbdl

08-12-2004, 10:09 PM

[ QUOTE ]
He lives on the other side of the country!

[/ QUOTE ]

You didn't answer the question...

vulturesrow

08-12-2004, 10:12 PM

I have 2 daughters with a third on the way. If my daughter came home and told me that she was in this situation , I would give serious consideration to shooting him.

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 10:30 PM

16 is the age in half the states, and it's 14 in Hawaii too.

Ulysses

08-12-2004, 10:35 PM

Just FYI, in California, the age of consent is 18. What you're doing is a special no-no.

(d) Any person over the age of 21 years who engages in an act of
unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor who is under 16 years of age
is guilty of either a misdemeanor or a felony, and shall be punished
by imprisonment in a county jail not exceeding one year, or by
imprisonment in the state prison for two, three, or four years.

California Age of Consent Statute (http://www.ageofconsent.com/california.htm)

nothumb

08-12-2004, 11:11 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Also if I was statutory rape is pretty much impossible to prosecute if the girl isn't pregnant.

[/ QUOTE ]

Not really true. If her parents force a confession and she cooperates, you'll need to learn how to fight, and fast. It really depends 99% on the parents once they find out.

Aside from this, getting away from legal nitpicky things, I say no, it's not cool. Fifteen year old girls are confused and scared, even when they project an image of calmness or excitement. If you actually try to have sex with her you will find this out pretty quickly.

I don't think it's good for either of you. Even if you get away with it, you will not be looked at the same way.

NT

Diplomat

08-12-2004, 11:19 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I'm not breaking any laws. Also if I was statutory rape is pretty much impossible to prosecute if the girl isn't pregnant.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, that makes it ok. It's only illegal or wrong if you are caught, right?

I don't care how small your dating pool is. If you want to get laid that bad, buy a bus ticket and head to a bigger city.

-Diplomat

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 11:42 PM

The victim accusing the defendent isn't proof beyond a reasonable doubt.

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 11:43 PM

I'm not a predator. That's not all I care about.

RPatterson

08-12-2004, 11:44 PM

Good thing I'm not over 21, she is almost 16, and we haven't had sex.

BadBoyBenny

08-12-2004, 11:56 PM

[ QUOTE ]
she was in junior high 15 months ago

[/ QUOTE ]

You are old enough to buy beer. She just got out of junior high. This is not a compelling arguement.

bwana devil

08-13-2004, 12:10 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I'm not breaking any laws. Also if I was statutory rape is pretty much impossible to prosecute if the girl isn't pregnant.

[/ QUOTE ]

do you not find a moral problem by trying to defend yourself as a rapist using statutory laws?

MarkL444

08-13-2004, 01:12 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I'd never agree to see one exclusively unless she was Lindsey Lohan and even then I expect daily road head.

[/ QUOTE ]

You are a better man having said this.

Utah

08-13-2004, 01:24 AM

Hi Ray,

I tried to find the post but I could not. I believe the context was congressmen and young ladies.

I believe I said it was odd for a very yound girl (eg. intern) to be hooked up with a 50 something congressman. I believe you and everyone else on ther board disagreed with me. I am trying to remember who married the 17 year old. Sorry I cant remember more.

Ray Zee

08-13-2004, 01:46 AM

i dont remember responding or even the post. i hope no one does as i think i am against a 50 year old and a 17 year old. she is too young. even if legal. but if legal i cant really condem them. but i cant blame the 50 year old man. but he should show better choice.

RPatterson

08-13-2004, 01:51 AM

I haven't commited statutory rape so I don't really find a moral dillema in defending myself of those accusations.

RPatterson

08-13-2004, 01:55 AM

If 17 is legal then 16 would be since that is the age of consent in half the states, not 17. So Ray you are for a girl 1 year over the age of consent seeing a 50 year old, and opposed to a girl a year under seeing a 20 year old?

What a bunch of bullshit.

nothumb

08-13-2004, 02:03 AM

E,

You obviously don't want to be swayed by the opinions of posters, from either a legal or a personal standpoint. So do what you're gonna do. But why ask in the first place?

NT

ZeeJustin

08-13-2004, 02:08 AM

21+15 seems like a poor decision on your part for multiple reasons. IF laws were not in place, strictly in terms of morality, I think there's nothing wrong with it. There are many things that are a lot more important to consider IMO.

TimM

08-13-2004, 02:13 AM

[ QUOTE ]
If 17 is legal then 16 would be since that is the age of consent in half the states, not 17. So Ray you are for a girl 1 year over the age of consent seeing a 50 year old, and opposed to a girl a year under seeing a 20 year old?

What a bunch of bullshit.

[/ QUOTE ]

21 into 15 is not cool.

23 into 18 is fine, not even a shadow of a doubt there.

But then I thought 34 into 21 was very cool at the time. /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

But if you're not doing the deed, it could be O.K. I guess it depends where it goes and what your intentions are.

ThaSaltCracka

08-13-2004, 02:28 AM

I agree with NT, why did you ask this question? Everyone here is telling you not to do it and you still think its okay.

Sundevils21

08-13-2004, 03:03 AM

Is the 15yr old gay and/or your fav athelete or teammate?
Would you have promblems showering with said 15yr old?

CollegePlayer

08-13-2004, 06:16 AM

[ QUOTE ]
Good thing I'm not over 21, she is almost 16, and we haven't had sex.

[/ QUOTE ]
Its 21 and over. You fall into the category.

stripsqueez

08-13-2004, 07:11 AM

[ QUOTE ]
The victim accusing the defendent isn't proof beyond a reasonable doubt.

[/ QUOTE ]

just a victim accusing a defendant isnt usually a strong case but it can certainly be proof beyond reasonable doubt - at least where i come from it can - there are probably a bunch of evidentiary rules about how such evidence is to be considered or presented but i would surprised if your statement was accurate

stripsqueez - chickenhawk

CollegePlayer

08-13-2004, 08:25 AM

elwoodblues

08-13-2004, 08:50 AM

[ QUOTE ]
What could you possibly have in common with her?

[/ QUOTE ]

Same question I asked ---- still unanswered.

tolbiny

08-13-2004, 09:17 AM

I believe 51 and 45 is quite proper.

Come on rick- there should definately be laws against people over 40 haveing sex...(at least for the next 15 years or so that is)

tolbiny

08-13-2004, 09:19 AM

One of my favorits from clueless....

"if anything happens to my daughter i own a .44 and a shovel- i doubt anyone would miss you"

tolbiny

08-13-2004, 09:23 AM

If this was Salem MA a couple of hundred years ago, the vast majority of people would be ok with burning "witches" alive- the simple fact that people have found an action acceptable in the past does not mean you should find it acceptable in the present.

elwoodblues

08-13-2004, 09:28 AM

[ QUOTE ]
IF THIS WERE ANCIENT GREECE YOU'D BE TOTALLY COOL WITH IT BRO

[/ QUOTE ]

It's not and I'm not.

MMMMMM

08-13-2004, 09:40 AM

"If 17 is legal then 16 would be since that is the age of consent in half the states, not 17. So Ray you are for a girl 1 year over the age of consent seeing a 50 year old, and opposed to a girl a year under seeing a 20 year old?

What a bunch of bullshit."

Erostratus,

I agree it looks like an arbitrary and illogical disctinction, but there are good reasons for it, in my opinion.

Here is what it comes down to:

Laws have to be in place to protect children from predatory or irresponsible adults (you don't sound predatory so that's not what I'm saying). For these laws to exist, an arbitrary cutoff age has to be spelled out legally as age of consent. So that explains the seeming arbitrariness of it. I think you would agree that the age of consent has to be legally spelled out to be some age.

On moral or ethical side of things, it is true that everyone matures emotionally at different rates. Some 25-year olds may even be less emotionally mature than some 18-year olds.

If you had to pick a minimum age where the average person could be presumed to have at least a half-decent sense of maturity, responsibility, and decision-making skills, where would that age be? I would say the senior year of high school if I had to pin it down to a specific year. That is in my opinion the minimum average age at which people start to act and think maturely.

A freshman or sophomore in high school is really at a very different place in life than someone who graduated a few years ago.

I think you would be very wise to cool it for a while. I'm not saying stop talking to her altogether, maybe you and she could even still have lunch together in the work day once in a while. But I think you would be very wise to not let it go any further than that right now. And very foolish to do the opposite.

If you and she truly do have a lot in common besides the hots for each other, you might pick it back up in a couple of years. But right now it is a very bad idea in my opinion. Cool it for a while 'til she is older and then maybe see if you are both still interested in each other. Chances are you will be dating someone else by then anyway, or she will, or both. But who knows for sure.

You really don't want to screw your life up badly at this point and that is a chance you are taking if you pursue this now. Not only that, but she really needs time with people more her age until she is at least a senior or she graduates or enters college.

tolbiny

08-13-2004, 09:43 AM

The problem i have with this situation is the basis for the statutory rape laws. When you deal with somone younger than you, or are in a position of athority it tends to make the subordinate in the raltionship feel the need to please (not nessicarily sexually) the one in authority. This makes it very difficult for the subordinate to actually be honestly able to make up their mind about what they want. Child molestors often go for years without suspicion/accusations from their victims becaseu fo this (Note:i am not trying to compare you to a child molester, just trying to show how dramatic the influence of age/authority can be).
If you are content to hold hands, and kiss, and leave it at that for quite a long time (and i dont mean a month or two) then you might be one of the very few 21 yr olds who are emotionally mature enough to actually date a 15 yr old. Once it goes any further she will (most likely) feel pressure to have sex with you, and this is when things can take a dubious turn in her decision making process. I hope you are mature enough to handle the situation well.

Note: the fact that there is a small dating pool doesnt change a thing.

adios

08-13-2004, 09:45 AM

You can get into lots of trouble over this. I know of someone who got 10 years in prison for an escapade with a minor (under 16) in the state they live in.

moondogg

08-13-2004, 09:57 AM

[ QUOTE ]
Also I live in a secluded area and most of the young people moved after high school. So there is a very small dating pool.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is the same thing lonely sheep farmers say.

Cleveland Guy

08-13-2004, 10:04 AM

21 years and 1 day is over 21.

Utah

08-13-2004, 10:38 AM

Hi Ray,

I apologize. I didnt mean to make any controversial statements attributed to you, especially since I didnt provide the reference. I guess I didnt think it was controversial because everyone agreed with you. My facts certainly could be wrong.

I was just more curious as to what you thought. I do think that most people would have a problem with a 21/15 relationship but they are more understanding on a congressman and an intern. I am curious why. For example, in Clinton's case I dont remember their being too much focus on the fact that he was over 30 when Monica was born.

elwoodblues

08-13-2004, 10:56 AM

Monica was an adult. A 15 year old is a little girl.

BeerMoney

08-13-2004, 11:12 AM

Dude, While the situation is understandable, I would break it off. The chance of going to jail or getting in trouble is just too great. Call it off for now, it will make her want you more.. Or, let her break it off so she feels no scar and doesn't want any vengeance.

Or, you might want to think about getting the permission of her parents and stuff. If you talk to her dad, explain the situation, etc... Go from there. What else can you do? You do NOT want to end up on the front page. Just be a good guy and things will work out..

Utah

08-13-2004, 11:14 AM

That was the crux of my original question.

Rick Nebiolo

08-13-2004, 11:20 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I believe 51 and 45 is quite proper.

Come on rick- there should definately be laws against people over 40 haveing sex...(at least for the next 15 years or so that is)

[/ QUOTE ]

Are you saying the sex improves or looks better if I wait 15 years? /images/graemlins/grin.gif

~ Rick

Toro

08-13-2004, 11:26 AM

[ QUOTE ]
1/2 your age +7.

That's all you need to know and it works with ALL ages.

[/ QUOTE ]

So lets see if this works. 55/2=27.5+7=34.5 Nope, doesn't work for me.

adios

08-13-2004, 11:32 AM

[ QUOTE ]
Or, you might want to think about getting the permission of her parents and stuff. If you talk to her dad, explain the situation, etc...

[/ QUOTE ]

This would probably be the best way to break it off. I'd bet the parents would not allow their 15 year old to data a 21 year old and he could use the legitimate reason that he can't go against her parent's rules.

B00T

08-13-2004, 01:13 PM

The relationship cant possibly work out...

You are dating a 15 yr old because you cannot get anyone else. If you could you would realize someone your own age and status makes a lot more sense. The fact you have to ask about it shows your hesitance towards the issue. You are in it for sex, which you wont get because of the fact it is illegal. You cant possibly have "so much in common with her". What could that be? The same favorite color?

Here is why it wont work...If you are in it for the sex, the sex will grow old and even someone this pathetic could continue to get laid by *someone* in this world. The novelty of sex would wear off and then if you were to sleep with her, your self esteem would finally go up, and you would go after someone that would actually know how to go down on a guy. You wont be in it for the love or the hopes of getting married.

If by some unforseen way, you can up a front to defend all of that, then move onto her thinking...

She clearly is many "rites of passage" phases behind you. Has not graduated high school, cannot drink legally, CANT EVEN DRIVE A CAR, etc etc. When she develops and matures her wants will be different then they are now. I can assure you they will not be you. You may like the person she is now, but she will be VERY different in the next 5-7 years.

A long-term relationship is not feasible. She will change dramatically. Are you the same person you are now as you were when you were 15? No, you were not. Women change. She will want to have a one-night stand in college, or at least see what sleeping with another guy would be like. The relationship would never last.

So with that being the case, why get involved with a 15 year old which is ILLEGAL to begin with? What are you trying to accomplish? You proved my arguement yourself by saying there is not much of a dating pool. Dating a minor out of desperation, and forcing a situation. If there were 2,000 19-22 yr old women around you, would you be going after this 15 yr old? Nope.

Like another poster wrote, go drive to the nearest big city and get laid. You clearly are using her for her proximity, and as a substitution. You should be the mature one and realize this is doomed to fail (since its about love), and avoid the situation before in 3 years you magically fall in love with her and she moves to her next stage in life and drops you like the bad habit you are.

lu_hawk

08-13-2004, 01:33 PM

Come on, if he talks to the dad do you think he will just tell him to cut it off. He will punch him in the teeth and call him a pervert.

sleepyjoeyt

08-13-2004, 01:48 PM

If by cool you mean, like Statutory Rape Cool, then yeah, its way cool.

THIS IS A JAILABLE OFFENSE. GET OUT NOW.

Not cool at all.

And if it was my daughter, you'd better watch your back.

Jaycie

08-13-2004, 02:57 PM

We talk about this at my work from time-to-time cause I work with a 22 year old that thinks this 16 year old is hot but says he wouldn't touch her if she paid him. Although the sr law in LV ends at 16 he says young girls are far more trouble than they are worth. IMO, as a chick, I would wonder why you'd have to go robbing the cradle when there's plenty hot chicks in this world closer to your age.

adios

08-14-2004, 02:03 AM

I'd recommend handling it by a phone call /images/graemlins/smile.gif. Actually upon further review I'd recommend just getting as far away from that situation as possible as quickly as possible.

Dominic

08-14-2004, 03:33 PM

hey, I dated a 19 yr. old when I was 34...for two years...

not looking for approval, just braggin'

/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Apocalypse

08-14-2004, 06:54 PM

[ QUOTE ]
I stopped talking to a 19yr old girl cause I thought it was inappropriate (I was 23 at the time).

[/ QUOTE ]

now thats just silly...

Apocalypse

08-14-2004, 07:08 PM

That said, i think its just about mental equality to some extend for me. And there is no no way a 15 year old can be anywhere near the same level as a "normal" 23 year old. Well...yes it can but in that case hes accountable for that, not her. In any other case, theres no healthy balance between the two persons. The older one is the dominator, and the other the dominated. Wether they are aware of their rolls or not.

im just cutting things short because im going to bed, and i know theres a lot to be said in between the sentences i put down here, but i trust most of you can fill in the blanks /images/graemlins/smirk.gif

Toro

08-16-2004, 03:26 PM

Formula didn't apply to Miss Hilton, age 20 who just married a 33 year old in LV this weekend.

jagoff

08-16-2004, 04:50 PM

You are going to end up in jail really fast so cut the relationship off! Ask the kid in GA that got thrown in the slammer for doing the same thing with a 15 yr old!

jagoff

08-16-2004, 04:52 PM

does anyone think there's a problem wtih a 23 yr old guy and an 18 yr old girl? one of my friends just couldn't believe i could consider it.

So you are on a date with this vixen? Where does a 23 yr old take a 18 yr old? Chuck E Cheese? The movies? Make out point? A high school beer party (great fun when the cops bust it and you are the only one old enough to buy beer so you get the big fine!) Can't take her to a bar! Nix that idea and move on to the drunken 21 year olds.