Tosh
08-11-2004, 05:11 PM
I did say I wasn't going to post new threads, but for today I had a lot to say. Its been a strange day for me but I felt some of the experience might be worthwhile reading for others in my position.
Today I got up at 4:00am to see my sister off for her holiday across the Atlantic. After she was gone at about 6:00am I was far too awake to sleep again, so I decided to jump into the games. Get together 4 tables of 15/30 and a coffee an I'm good to go!
I start well winning a nice pot with unimproved 99 and flop trips twice with BB cheese. I've been playing half an hour and I'm up just over 1k, but then the beats start coming. The usual list of sob stories seeing all my premium hands go down to some very fishy players. The tables are great but that doesn't matter and after I finish a 2 hour session, I am down about 2k overall. Nothing major in the swings of the game but these losses still get to me. Coupled with a generally bad week in SNGs/Multis as well as ring games, leaving me stuck about 4.5k.
<15/30 interlude>
I still don't have too much experience at 15/30 - not even 10k hands over a couple of months - but emotionally the games can be exhausting. There are abundant fish, as everyone loves to point out, but for me its not about beating the players, I am playing myself and my emotions. I can easily beat the game, I am stubborn in believing otherwise, but can I beat myself and keep control?
<end 15/30 interlude>
Well after today's session I just felt dejected and frustrated, afterall it was before breakfast time and I had lost more money than the average persons earns in a fortnight. I made a snap decision to quit the games and return to the 5/10 games, I withdrew most of my money from Empire/Party and Stars leaving enough to play 5/10 only.
Not interested in poker I went out for a drive and saw a few friends, all the while I was thinking about if I was too hasty in my decision - this would be the 4th time I have reacted badly to a loss like this. Each time I have learned a lot and its improved me, but each time I've wished I stuck it out.
I came back and sat down in a couple of 5/10 games; I lasted 1 orbit in each, but I couldn't be bothered with them, I honestly believe I should be playing higher than those games and just couldn't motivate. So what to do? Well I wasn't sure but then the thought occurred, what am I actually worried about? I have built a bankroll able to take the swings of the game, I have confidence in my ability and constantly try to improve my game, letting these set backs affect me so badly is just crazy. Whatsmore I am young, I have no family to support and very few essential expenses, the money is my bankroll and needs to be viewed as such. I decided to not let it beat me and redeposited into Empire upto 12k (for the time being). I had certainly had enough of poker for one day but all the same I had made my decision and was pysched up to get going again. Tomorrow is another day and win lose or draw I shall keep going.
Day 3: 488 hands, -$1716.50
Overall: 787/5000.
Today I got up at 4:00am to see my sister off for her holiday across the Atlantic. After she was gone at about 6:00am I was far too awake to sleep again, so I decided to jump into the games. Get together 4 tables of 15/30 and a coffee an I'm good to go!
I start well winning a nice pot with unimproved 99 and flop trips twice with BB cheese. I've been playing half an hour and I'm up just over 1k, but then the beats start coming. The usual list of sob stories seeing all my premium hands go down to some very fishy players. The tables are great but that doesn't matter and after I finish a 2 hour session, I am down about 2k overall. Nothing major in the swings of the game but these losses still get to me. Coupled with a generally bad week in SNGs/Multis as well as ring games, leaving me stuck about 4.5k.
<15/30 interlude>
I still don't have too much experience at 15/30 - not even 10k hands over a couple of months - but emotionally the games can be exhausting. There are abundant fish, as everyone loves to point out, but for me its not about beating the players, I am playing myself and my emotions. I can easily beat the game, I am stubborn in believing otherwise, but can I beat myself and keep control?
<end 15/30 interlude>
Well after today's session I just felt dejected and frustrated, afterall it was before breakfast time and I had lost more money than the average persons earns in a fortnight. I made a snap decision to quit the games and return to the 5/10 games, I withdrew most of my money from Empire/Party and Stars leaving enough to play 5/10 only.
Not interested in poker I went out for a drive and saw a few friends, all the while I was thinking about if I was too hasty in my decision - this would be the 4th time I have reacted badly to a loss like this. Each time I have learned a lot and its improved me, but each time I've wished I stuck it out.
I came back and sat down in a couple of 5/10 games; I lasted 1 orbit in each, but I couldn't be bothered with them, I honestly believe I should be playing higher than those games and just couldn't motivate. So what to do? Well I wasn't sure but then the thought occurred, what am I actually worried about? I have built a bankroll able to take the swings of the game, I have confidence in my ability and constantly try to improve my game, letting these set backs affect me so badly is just crazy. Whatsmore I am young, I have no family to support and very few essential expenses, the money is my bankroll and needs to be viewed as such. I decided to not let it beat me and redeposited into Empire upto 12k (for the time being). I had certainly had enough of poker for one day but all the same I had made my decision and was pysched up to get going again. Tomorrow is another day and win lose or draw I shall keep going.
Day 3: 488 hands, -$1716.50
Overall: 787/5000.