How Can I Join "The Crew"

[RPatterson]

I'm a 21 year old jerk with an inflated sense of how good I am at poker. I'd like to get down with the crew. Where are they located at?

[Vehn]

Do you still have your front teeth?

[RPatterson]

Yeah, don't most of them? Are you saying they have had their teeth punched out? Or they are drug addicts and their teeth fall out? Maybe they eat alot of sweets and don't brush? The crew isn't down with what your saying man. The crew is wondering what's going on.

[ThaSaltCracka]

no, if you still have your front teeth, you won't be able to suck dick like they do.

[RPatterson]

Are you kidding me? Everyone knows the crew scores women like crazy! In fact, there are girls that are "friends of the crew" if you know what I mean.

[JalKelly]

that is really really funny stuff. I am crying

[jagoff]

From the "official" THE CREW Website:

To join the crew you MUST meet the following criteria...
1. Have a gaping crap hole that looks like it was wrecked with a crow bar.
2. Must have an immense knowledge of Advanced Dungeons and Dragons
3. Must be gay.
4. On circle jerk night, you must be well versed in both left and right handed jerking as well as have a taste for "oogie cookie".
5. Must suck at reading opposing poker players
6. Teeth are optional. False teeth are optimal for teeth out knob jobs.

[cassise]

Jagoff you forgot to scroll down on the official website, if you did you would have seen:
7. Must be willing to jerk off a fellow crew member during a tournament.
8. Must be concinved that you are far better than you are.
9. Must be able to convince ESPN that being able to do basic chip tricks makes you the coolest person in the world and a good poker player.
10. Must not be opposed to spending your time with somebody who stole\squandered the money of many online poker players.

[jedi]

You've also got to cheer really loudly and obnoxiously every time you're hopelessly behind and manage to catch the miracle 2 outer on the river to win. This tends to work better A) the further it is from the end of the tournament and B) the greater the celebration. See Mark Madsen's dancing moves during the Lakers championship run of the early 2000s.

[jwvdcw]

Very funny thread, but lol at those who think they aren't good poker players...what did they win THREE braclets this year just by luck?

[jagoff]

Thanks for the correction. I know you guys like full reports.

[BarronVangorToth]

I still can't believe people feel the need to bash guys just because they "made it" to the point where they are world-renowned and winning bracelets.

You have to remember that 90% of their "image" is 100% the contrivance of ESPN trying to make up good television.

That's all it is -- some director wanting to fill in 5 minutes and give "an angle" to who is at the final table.

It's Storyline 101 -- you see it on the news, you see it in wrestling, you see it everywhere.


Barron Vangor Toth
www.BarronVangorToth.com (http://www.BarronVangorToth.com)
"President of Barron's Crew"

[ QUOTE ]
I still can't believe people feel the need to bash guys just because they "made it" to the point where they are world-renowned and winning bracelets.

You have to remember that 90% of their "image" is 100% the contrivance of ESPN trying to make up good television.

That's all it is -- some director wanting to fill in 5 minutes and give "an angle" to who is at the final table.

It's Storyline 101 -- you see it on the news, you see it in wrestling, you see it everywhere.


Barron Vangor Toth
www.BarronVangorToth.com (http://www.BarronVangorToth.com)
"President of Barron's Crew"

[/ QUOTE ]

I agree with your points, however, they still come off as idiots. They need to cool it with this "we are going to take over the poker world" crap. No one is going to take over the poker world. There are too many people playing poker and with the luck factor involved, no one person or group will dominate.

[italianstang]

If the ESPN producer guy came to my house and explained the segment and said that he wanted me and my friends to walk down the middle of the street a bunch of times looking tough so they could put it in slow motion I would tell him to fu*k off.

[Peter_rus]

This thread is indeed funny. I thought I remember reading last year about The Crew right after the WSOP, how all of them shared a house together in Culver City, pooling their money together so they could try to take over the world. Anyone know if they all still live together? Do they share their winnings? And I thought there was a woman also amongst them back then?